Re: OT? HSDLA and Gay Marriage
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/13/2003 7:56:37 AM Eastern Standard Time,
[email protected] writes:
ok, wanting to make sure I understand
- not knowing that your friend's mom was gay for many years after middle
school -rather, believing some incorrect assumption...helped you to 'normalize' it?
Please forgive what may come accross as...offensive, I am new here and even
if I wasn't (new) I assure you, attacking is not my line, promise.
but something isnt sitting right here, with me anyways,
and its not about gay, good/bad/normal or anything controversial,
its about being open and honest with my kids...about MY feelings...and
allowing my kids to have feelings of their own about the subject, objectively, and
to do that, they would have to KNOW what the subject is...
Avoiding entirely the issue of normalcy, and other potential controversies I
would suggest an example;
every time you have ever seen a bowl of fruit it contained apples and
bananas, you have seen green, yellow and red apples, and bananas in many fruit bowls,
all of your friends have them on their tables, in their dining rooms, apples
and bananas.
Your best friend had a green looking roundish object in her bowl, with her
banana, her mother always referred to the bowl as the bowl, and your mother
never said anything, never brought attention to it, you knew she had seen it,and
it was sitting in front of everyone- on the dining table. You assumed it was an
apple,
Later you found out it was an avacado, and your mom was very matter of fact
and accepting. This helped you to understand that avacados are normal.
ummm
I read this differently. I read it as if her mom didn't make a big deal about
it one way or another -- that this was a family she visited, and it happened
to be a same-sex couple. It's likely they weren't out (since the other woman
was referred to as an "aunt"), and that it wouldn't, at the time, be
appropriate to share with her daughter, "Oh, they're lesbians."
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected] writes:
ok, wanting to make sure I understand
- not knowing that your friend's mom was gay for many years after middle
school -rather, believing some incorrect assumption...helped you to 'normalize' it?
Please forgive what may come accross as...offensive, I am new here and even
if I wasn't (new) I assure you, attacking is not my line, promise.
but something isnt sitting right here, with me anyways,
and its not about gay, good/bad/normal or anything controversial,
its about being open and honest with my kids...about MY feelings...and
allowing my kids to have feelings of their own about the subject, objectively, and
to do that, they would have to KNOW what the subject is...
Avoiding entirely the issue of normalcy, and other potential controversies I
would suggest an example;
every time you have ever seen a bowl of fruit it contained apples and
bananas, you have seen green, yellow and red apples, and bananas in many fruit bowls,
all of your friends have them on their tables, in their dining rooms, apples
and bananas.
Your best friend had a green looking roundish object in her bowl, with her
banana, her mother always referred to the bowl as the bowl, and your mother
never said anything, never brought attention to it, you knew she had seen it,and
it was sitting in front of everyone- on the dining table. You assumed it was an
apple,
Later you found out it was an avacado, and your mom was very matter of fact
and accepting. This helped you to understand that avacados are normal.
ummm
I read this differently. I read it as if her mom didn't make a big deal about
it one way or another -- that this was a family she visited, and it happened
to be a same-sex couple. It's likely they weren't out (since the other woman
was referred to as an "aunt"), and that it wouldn't, at the time, be
appropriate to share with her daughter, "Oh, they're lesbians."
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
pam sorooshian
Those of you using AOL 9.0 - your "quoting" isn't working automatically
and so it is nearly impossible to tell, from your posts, what you are
quoting versus what you are writing yourself because it is all run
together.
If anybody has figured out how to make it work - please feel free to
post it here so that others can fix it too.
If not - maybe those on AOL 9.0 can manually edit their own posts,
before hitting send, to put quote marks of some sort around their
quoted material? I know I'd sure appreciate it because I do WANT to be
able to read and comprehend what you've written.
-pam
and so it is nearly impossible to tell, from your posts, what you are
quoting versus what you are writing yourself because it is all run
together.
If anybody has figured out how to make it work - please feel free to
post it here so that others can fix it too.
If not - maybe those on AOL 9.0 can manually edit their own posts,
before hitting send, to put quote marks of some sort around their
quoted material? I know I'd sure appreciate it because I do WANT to be
able to read and comprehend what you've written.
-pam
Andrea
At 10:13 AM 10/13/03 -0400, Kathryn wrote:
were a few couples like this that we knew. Everyone (or just about) knew
they were lesbians but no one ever said it out loud. It was only when I was
in my teens I realized the full nature of the relationships. My cousin has
been in a long-term relationship for twenty years or more and no one talks
about it, they just accept it, and her partner is present at all family
events. I'm sure some people don't like it but they are free to suffer in
private :-)
Donna
>I read this differently. I read it as if her mom didn't make a big deal aboutMe too. When I was growing up in small-town Nova Scotia in the 70's there
>it one way or another -- that this was a family she visited, and it happened
>to be a same-sex couple. It's likely they weren't out (since the other woman
>was referred to as an "aunt"), and that it wouldn't, at the time, be
>appropriate to share with her daughter, "Oh, they're lesbians."
were a few couples like this that we knew. Everyone (or just about) knew
they were lesbians but no one ever said it out loud. It was only when I was
in my teens I realized the full nature of the relationships. My cousin has
been in a long-term relationship for twenty years or more and no one talks
about it, they just accept it, and her partner is present at all family
events. I'm sure some people don't like it but they are free to suffer in
private :-)
Donna
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/13/2003 10:25:26 AM Central Standard Time,
pamsoroosh@... writes:
stay two versions behind for them to work out the bugs. We're on aol 7.0 now.
Elizabeth
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
pamsoroosh@... writes:
> Those of you using AOL 9.0 - your "quoting" isn't working automaticallyI asked Mark about this. He said this is one of the reasons why we always
> and so it is nearly impossible to tell, from your posts, what you are
> quoting versus what you are writing yourself because it is all run
> together.
>
stay two versions behind for them to work out the bugs. We're on aol 7.0 now.
Elizabeth
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 10-13-2003 9:25:50 AM Mountain Daylight Time,
pamsoroosh@... writes:
maybe those on AOL 9.0 can manually edit their own posts,
before hitting send, to put quote marks of some sort around their
quoted material?
****************************
I just put in a line between the quote and my input :) (see above!)
diana,
The wackiest widow westriver...
"You can follow your book and your map of wars, but I'll go and follow my
kids." -- Woody Guthrie
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
pamsoroosh@... writes:
maybe those on AOL 9.0 can manually edit their own posts,
before hitting send, to put quote marks of some sort around their
quoted material?
****************************
I just put in a line between the quote and my input :) (see above!)
diana,
The wackiest widow westriver...
"You can follow your book and your map of wars, but I'll go and follow my
kids." -- Woody Guthrie
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]