Carli

Tracy, thank you for sharing that article. I will save it and pass it on
to some of my friends. It was very enlightening to me.
~Carli

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From: Tracy Oldfield <Tracy@...-online.co.uk>
To: [email protected]
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: breastfeeding - Stephanie, Bridget and
Wendy
Date: Sunday, April 09, 2000 9:21 PM

If this looks odd, it's cos it was 3 separate emails that I decided should
go together, but I don't want to spend time editing them now. Hope no-one
minds :-)

Bridget, I know what you mean. I don't want to get offensive, but I don't
mean that formula is 'just as good.' It's an inferior product, but babies
can still thrive on it, my own daughter, touch wood, has no physical
problems with it. The point is that unless people take breastfeeding down
from it's pedestal and say 'This is the natural thing to do,' some people
are going to hold it up as an unapproachable ideal, which I did to an
extent with the general lifestyle portrayed in the Art of Breastfeeding (GB
and NZ version from about 10 years ago.) I was heartbroken when I couldn't
continue breastfeeding Heather, partly because I'd held it up so high.
Anyway, I've been sent the article I was talking about, I'll attach it. If
the group doesn't accept attachments, I can send it privately to anyone who
wants it, or if the consensus of the list agrees, I can cut-and-paste it to
the list. It explains what I mean much better than I can :-)

Tracy

PS Support for parents interested in child-led weaning can be found at
[email protected]

--------------------------------------------------

Stephanie, you both deserve a big round of applause for being open to
discussion, with your past experiences, and your dh's reservations about
the benefits. I know you wanted the discussion closed, but I would like to
add a few more thoughts. You don't have to read them if you don't want :-)

I am glad that you have reached a decision that works for you both. And
while I understand the desire for the husband to bond with the child, I
think I have to point out that there are so many ways that we bond with our
babies, feeding is only one of them. There are many breastfeeding fathers
who feel well-connected to their children, and their partners no doubt feel
indebted for their commitment to their families' well-being. Yes,
expressing milk is the next best thing to breastfeeding, with, according to
the WHO other mothers' expressed milk next and formula fourth and last on
the priority list. I would add other mother breastfeeding (in cases where
maternal breastfeeding is not possible, rather than not desired) 'wet
nursing,' below maternal breastfeeding in this list, because there is much
more to breastfeeding than nutritional content. This is what was so
upsetting for me. I knew that while some babies have allergic reactions to
formula, some babies suffer medical problems later in life due to
bottlefeeding, I have not suffered any visible effects (yet) from being
bottlefed. I wanted my children to experience the whole experience of
breastfeeding, the skin contact, the physical developmental differences...
I wanted to experience breastfeeding, the hormonal rush, the skin contact.
It was particularly important for me since Heather had spent time in SCBU
that I become the only person who could provide this for my daughter.
Other people can do anything else for a baby, and in some societies, even
breastfeeding is widely shared. But it is a very special thing for a
mother to share with her baby, and I am glad that I experienced it, and
still do, with my second child. Now, if only I could persuade her to
stop.... <g>

Thanks for listening here, and I hope your dialogue continues, since I
think that parenting issues are never really closed.

Tracy

PS I have to admire your commitment to expressing, I found it to be very
difficult and did not produce enough to feed my daughter fully after a few
weeks, even though I had provided for her completely while she was on the
SCBU.

-----------------------------------

Wendy, you're right, that's why I made the point that I don't speak for LLL
earlier :-)

But I'd be interested to know what exactly you think gave LLL a bad name,
either on or off list.

Tracy