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In a message dated 8/7/03 10:11:57 AM, kbcdlovejo@... writes:

<< My favorite ages are toddlers and teens---the two that *most* people find
the
most "choresome" and difficult. >>

Mine too, I think, though Holly has been a joy at all stages. Maybe I just
like girls better! (But I like my boys more than most other boys' moms seem to
like theirs.)

Marty was never as difficult as Kirby, either. I've liked all my kids all
the time, but that doesn't keep some parts of their lives from standing out
almost magically. Marty was the sweetest four year old I've ever met.

-=-I expected backlash because all these groups are clique-y and I'm not
stupid.-=-


The same way it helps to think well of our children, it helps to think well
of others we deal with if we possibly can. Looking for trouble isn't smart,
nor helpful to the list nor helpful to others trying to get unschooling.

-=-. . . and I'm not stupid.-=-

The movie Forrest Gump has a famous line:

"Stupid is as stupid does."

It's a play on a southern idiom: "Beauty is as beauty does." Appearance
doesn't make one good.

If this list seems to outsiders to have "a clique," then that's the paranoid
lost feeling in the reader. The "clique," if there is one, consists of those
who are being consistently helpful to others and who are actually living
successful unschooling lives and then spending their spare time trying to help
others do the same. Yes, I will defend ANYone here who is goodheartedly trying to
help, against anyone who is pointedly trying to make them look small. And
then some people WILL say "OH well, the I guess she's in your clique TOO!"

There is a deep immaturity in that. Immaturity can be overcome. Paranoia
can be overcome. Feeling like an outsider can be overcome, IF you can see it
for what it is.

If one posts to make trouble instead of to help others understand
unschooling, one is not being goodhearted nor helpful. If one posts "Kelly, you make me
sick, Kelly," one is not posting about issues, but about individuals.

Sandra