seeking feedback from those with 'late' readers
sally mabelle
Hi-
I'm new to the list and am in the process of leaving waldorf teaching to
live in an 'unschooling' way with my almost 11-year old son. I am gathering
other folks here on Kauai to create a democratic school / homeschool
resource center together, yet I'm finding I'm judging myself as hypocritical
for preaching 'just relax and trust the process' while secretly harboring
fears that I'm being neglectful in allowing my son to unfold at his pace
without more directive intervention.
I'd love to hear your success stories in allowing your children to unfold
and trusing that they will eventually enjoy or perhaps have an inkling of
interest in things like reading and figuring things out with numbers.
My son is an intelligent, sweet boy who has grown up being read to nightly.
He adores being read to, he just has not interest in reading. He also is
not very skilled - reads very, very slowly without any degree of fluency.
I'm fighting the urge within myself to 'go to the authorities' and have him
'tested', etc. I'm trying to remind myself that he is unique and he will
bloom in his own time, but I need some support!
Will you please write to me?!
Thanks-
Sally Mabelle
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I'm new to the list and am in the process of leaving waldorf teaching to
live in an 'unschooling' way with my almost 11-year old son. I am gathering
other folks here on Kauai to create a democratic school / homeschool
resource center together, yet I'm finding I'm judging myself as hypocritical
for preaching 'just relax and trust the process' while secretly harboring
fears that I'm being neglectful in allowing my son to unfold at his pace
without more directive intervention.
I'd love to hear your success stories in allowing your children to unfold
and trusing that they will eventually enjoy or perhaps have an inkling of
interest in things like reading and figuring things out with numbers.
My son is an intelligent, sweet boy who has grown up being read to nightly.
He adores being read to, he just has not interest in reading. He also is
not very skilled - reads very, very slowly without any degree of fluency.
I'm fighting the urge within myself to 'go to the authorities' and have him
'tested', etc. I'm trying to remind myself that he is unique and he will
bloom in his own time, but I need some support!
Will you please write to me?!
Thanks-
Sally Mabelle
_________________________________________________________________
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Jon and Rue Kream
Hi Sally -
Valerie Fitzenreiter. Her unschooled daughter is 23 now, and the book is
about unschooling and parenting. I really enjoyed it. It's not about
'later' readers, but it might help you with any lingering unschooling
doubts.
It really is true that your son will blossom in his own time if you give him
the space to do so. I'm loving watching my kids unfold and grow. Reading,
helping with housework, learning to do their part in relationships,
mathematical understanding - it all comes to them when they are ready, and
they accept it with joy and excitement. Unschooling is a wonderful way to
live.
Cherish his sweetness, enjoy those snuggled up reading times, and, yes, just
relax :0). ~Rue
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>>I'd love to hear your success stories**First of all, I want to recommend a new book, The Unprocessed Child, by
Valerie Fitzenreiter. Her unschooled daughter is 23 now, and the book is
about unschooling and parenting. I really enjoyed it. It's not about
'later' readers, but it might help you with any lingering unschooling
doubts.
It really is true that your son will blossom in his own time if you give him
the space to do so. I'm loving watching my kids unfold and grow. Reading,
helping with housework, learning to do their part in relationships,
mathematical understanding - it all comes to them when they are ready, and
they accept it with joy and excitement. Unschooling is a wonderful way to
live.
Cherish his sweetness, enjoy those snuggled up reading times, and, yes, just
relax :0). ~Rue
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
The only help testing will do is to put pressure on you in the beginning. The
tests gauge areas most kids are not tested in so who knows what a typical
public school child would score on say reading comprehension?
If you test you will be able to say later that you Unschooled and he turned
out fine but is it worth the stress on you both.
I myself did the worry last October. I took Dustin to Sylvan Learning Centers
and I came out with a 1st grade 9th month reading comprehension level when he
read out loud. THAT is what the focused on. It didn't matter to me because he
is at home so the need to read out loud over the next couple years didn't
matter one bit. In his reading to himself he was 3.1. His History/Social Studies
was grade 6! Some where he was getting it and the tests did not show it at
all.
I can say now almost a year later he is reading everything he can. He is not
a book worm at all. He reads military history esp Marine Corps, Comic books,
surfing magazines, XBox games, local swap and sell it guides and good ol' Ebay.
It wasn't text books or the 800 hours = 4-6000.00 (suggested we take out a
loan on our home) Sylvan said he needed but rather in my opinion TRUST, age,
video games, and his love for surfing! And he also told me he just colored in
stuff on the test cuz he was hungry and it was taking too long.
So 175.00 later I can test forever but why, its all about the all mighty
dollar and selling tutor time.
Stay on the list all will be ok......: )
BTW welcome to the list
Laura D
Dustin 11 , Cassidy 3 & Nicholas 13 mo
Maine
<<<I'm fighting the urge within myself to 'go to the authorities' and have
him
'tested', etc. I'm trying to remind myself that he is unique and he will
bloom in his own time, but I need some support!
Will you please write to me?!
Thanks-
Sally Mabelle
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
tests gauge areas most kids are not tested in so who knows what a typical
public school child would score on say reading comprehension?
If you test you will be able to say later that you Unschooled and he turned
out fine but is it worth the stress on you both.
I myself did the worry last October. I took Dustin to Sylvan Learning Centers
and I came out with a 1st grade 9th month reading comprehension level when he
read out loud. THAT is what the focused on. It didn't matter to me because he
is at home so the need to read out loud over the next couple years didn't
matter one bit. In his reading to himself he was 3.1. His History/Social Studies
was grade 6! Some where he was getting it and the tests did not show it at
all.
I can say now almost a year later he is reading everything he can. He is not
a book worm at all. He reads military history esp Marine Corps, Comic books,
surfing magazines, XBox games, local swap and sell it guides and good ol' Ebay.
It wasn't text books or the 800 hours = 4-6000.00 (suggested we take out a
loan on our home) Sylvan said he needed but rather in my opinion TRUST, age,
video games, and his love for surfing! And he also told me he just colored in
stuff on the test cuz he was hungry and it was taking too long.
So 175.00 later I can test forever but why, its all about the all mighty
dollar and selling tutor time.
Stay on the list all will be ok......: )
BTW welcome to the list
Laura D
Dustin 11 , Cassidy 3 & Nicholas 13 mo
Maine
<<<I'm fighting the urge within myself to 'go to the authorities' and have
him
'tested', etc. I'm trying to remind myself that he is unique and he will
bloom in his own time, but I need some support!
Will you please write to me?!
Thanks-
Sally Mabelle
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 8/3/2003 5:32:47 PM Mountain Daylight Time, HMSL2@...
writes:
Tests don't help.
The best they do is justify teacher's salaries, where applicable. They like
to pretend kids wouldn't do better on tests just by gettig older, but that ANY
improvements are directly to the credit of a teacher or to materials
ordisciplineor better school morale. All nonsense, but they have money to spend and
justify.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
writes:
>That's not help.
> The only help testing will do
Tests don't help.
The best they do is justify teacher's salaries, where applicable. They like
to pretend kids wouldn't do better on tests just by gettig older, but that ANY
improvements are directly to the credit of a teacher or to materials
ordisciplineor better school morale. All nonsense, but they have money to spend and
justify.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
You are right Sanda.
I had started to re-write that statement but in my situation that was a big
part of what had convinced "me" that I was done with testing and to him that
the numbers didn't matter. At the time I didn't know it but was close. It
wasn't until "he" choose "his" path that I had begun to relax in my head.
I never would have believed that they will read when they are ready until I
saw it with my own eyes.
The testing showed us all that even out of school one must beware. Not to
mention the guilt trip they played if we didn't "invest" the 800 hrs "in our sons
future". We did just at home and he did it not us. No pushing, no comments a
few capachinos at B & N and mom and son conversations.
May not sound like much but sitting here thinking about our families turning
point my eyes still well up..
Laura D
<<<In a message dated 8/3/2003 5:32:47 PM Mountain Daylight Time,
HMSL2@...
writes:> The only help testing will do
That's not help.
Tests don't help.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I had started to re-write that statement but in my situation that was a big
part of what had convinced "me" that I was done with testing and to him that
the numbers didn't matter. At the time I didn't know it but was close. It
wasn't until "he" choose "his" path that I had begun to relax in my head.
I never would have believed that they will read when they are ready until I
saw it with my own eyes.
The testing showed us all that even out of school one must beware. Not to
mention the guilt trip they played if we didn't "invest" the 800 hrs "in our sons
future". We did just at home and he did it not us. No pushing, no comments a
few capachinos at B & N and mom and son conversations.
May not sound like much but sitting here thinking about our families turning
point my eyes still well up..
Laura D
<<<In a message dated 8/3/2003 5:32:47 PM Mountain Daylight Time,
HMSL2@...
writes:> The only help testing will do
> In a message dated 8/3/2003 8:24:20 PM Eastern Standard Time,SandraDodd@... writes:
That's not help.
Tests don't help.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Julie Solich
>>> I'd love to hear your success stories in allowing your children tounfold and trusing that they will eventually enjoy or perhaps have an
inkling of
interest in things like reading and figuring things out with numbers.>>>
My 9 yos, Jesse, is loving the freedom of unschooling. He has had no problem
learning to read but has had no concept of numbers at all, even after three
years of workbooks (hmm, or maybe because of them?). It has been such a
relief for me to be able to just stop trying to *help* him to understand.
We have been playing Monopoly lately (waiting until Mark is home and we've
had dinner. It's such a great way to end the day.) and he is starting to get
it. He was adding up numbers himself the last time we played which is huge.
I'm just glad that he never felt like a failure because he wasn't
understanding it when I was ready for him to.
Children will learn what they need to when they need to if we let them be. I
have just been reminding myself of this over and over again and I am finding
that I don't need to do it so often anymore. I can see the reality of it
unfolding around me. It's magical.
Julie
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