Re: Unschooling sex
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Do we unschool sex education?
Well, here's the deal.I think unschooling is supporting one another in
learning through passion and relationship. So we talk to one another all the time. I
initiate conversations about all kinds of things, as does Julian. Sex and
development are some of those things. Do I always wait for a spark of interest
before initiating a conversation? Nope. Do I force stuff on Julian he has no
interest in? Also nope, but I have to tell you that something that interests or
matters to the conversation initiator is unlikely to totally disinterest the
initiatee. (Yes, I am pretty sure that's not a word.)
I've talked to many adults who remember being unprepared for the changes
their bodies make in puberty. Most girls are at least warned about menstruation,
but apparently lots of boys aren't about wet dreams, and are scared that
they've started wetting the bed, that they have cancer, etc. I wanted Julian never
to have to be afraid of that, and long before it was an issue we talked about
it. When it finally happened, he knew immediately what it was, and told us.
I also made sure there were good books about puberty, relationships, etc.
around. I handed them to Julian (not all at once) and said, "You might be
interested." He'd usually dash off and read them, rarely, but sometimes, asking
questions.
I am a great proponent of Car Sex Education. We have lots of conversations
about sex in the car driving places. Think about it. Uninterrupted time, and the
driver and kid are prevented from much eye-contact, which makes having a
casual conversation about a possibly embarassing subject much easier.
I've never planned or carried out a structured sex education plan. Just like
we talk about spirituality, what form of matter smoke is, civil rights,
whether Klingon or Esperanto is a more useful or noble second language to learn (I
know, weird kid), we talk. Sexuality is about relationship, and so is learning
about it.
So...yeah. We unschool sexuality. That said, if we can figure out a way to
pull it off, our church denomination offers a fabulous sexuality program called
Our Whole Lives, and I would love to have Julian do it. Not that he can't
learn otherwise, and not that I would make him if he were disinterested, but
because it's such an amazing opportunity.
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Well, here's the deal.I think unschooling is supporting one another in
learning through passion and relationship. So we talk to one another all the time. I
initiate conversations about all kinds of things, as does Julian. Sex and
development are some of those things. Do I always wait for a spark of interest
before initiating a conversation? Nope. Do I force stuff on Julian he has no
interest in? Also nope, but I have to tell you that something that interests or
matters to the conversation initiator is unlikely to totally disinterest the
initiatee. (Yes, I am pretty sure that's not a word.)
I've talked to many adults who remember being unprepared for the changes
their bodies make in puberty. Most girls are at least warned about menstruation,
but apparently lots of boys aren't about wet dreams, and are scared that
they've started wetting the bed, that they have cancer, etc. I wanted Julian never
to have to be afraid of that, and long before it was an issue we talked about
it. When it finally happened, he knew immediately what it was, and told us.
I also made sure there were good books about puberty, relationships, etc.
around. I handed them to Julian (not all at once) and said, "You might be
interested." He'd usually dash off and read them, rarely, but sometimes, asking
questions.
I am a great proponent of Car Sex Education. We have lots of conversations
about sex in the car driving places. Think about it. Uninterrupted time, and the
driver and kid are prevented from much eye-contact, which makes having a
casual conversation about a possibly embarassing subject much easier.
I've never planned or carried out a structured sex education plan. Just like
we talk about spirituality, what form of matter smoke is, civil rights,
whether Klingon or Esperanto is a more useful or noble second language to learn (I
know, weird kid), we talk. Sexuality is about relationship, and so is learning
about it.
So...yeah. We unschool sexuality. That said, if we can figure out a way to
pull it off, our church denomination offers a fabulous sexuality program called
Our Whole Lives, and I would love to have Julian do it. Not that he can't
learn otherwise, and not that I would make him if he were disinterested, but
because it's such an amazing opportunity.
Kathryn
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]