leaving yard w/o permission
Mary
I can imagine how you must have felt when she didn't answer and you didn't see her. I think a lot of us parents have had seconds of fright from something similar. I also think the first gut reaction when you see the child would be to say something you didn't really mean because you were scared.
I would try and talk to her a lot about what you went through, how you felt and why you were so scared. I would talk about what she said to the grandparent of one of the kids. Maybe it might not have been exactly "well my mom said I could go now." She knew you were going to let her go to the pool and well, being a kid, in her eyes she wasn't really lying about you letting her. So forget the lying part and any disobeying part you might want to mention. Talk about it as long as she can and when things get too intense, leave it for another time. But keep talking.
And I would, if it were me, say I made a mistake about the punishment. That I was just very upset and scared. I would not ground her or punish her for what she seems to not really have done on purpose.
Mary B
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I would try and talk to her a lot about what you went through, how you felt and why you were so scared. I would talk about what she said to the grandparent of one of the kids. Maybe it might not have been exactly "well my mom said I could go now." She knew you were going to let her go to the pool and well, being a kid, in her eyes she wasn't really lying about you letting her. So forget the lying part and any disobeying part you might want to mention. Talk about it as long as she can and when things get too intense, leave it for another time. But keep talking.
And I would, if it were me, say I made a mistake about the punishment. That I was just very upset and scared. I would not ground her or punish her for what she seems to not really have done on purpose.
Mary B
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Fausey-Khosraviani
Thanks, Mary. It's nice to know that some many people care about Margaux and me in this situation. Thank you for your kind words.
Nichole
Nichole
----- Original Message -----
From: Mary
To: Unschooling list.com
Sent: Monday, June 16, 2003 7:09 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] leaving yard w/o permission
I can imagine how you must have felt when she didn't answer and you didn't see her. I think a lot of us parents have had seconds of fright from something similar. I also think the first gut reaction when you see the child would be to say something you didn't really mean because you were scared.
I would try and talk to her a lot about what you went through, how you felt and why you were so scared. I would talk about what she said to the grandparent of one of the kids. Maybe it might not have been exactly "well my mom said I could go now." She knew you were going to let her go to the pool and well, being a kid, in her eyes she wasn't really lying about you letting her. So forget the lying part and any disobeying part you might want to mention. Talk about it as long as she can and when things get too intense, leave it for another time. But keep talking.
And I would, if it were me, say I made a mistake about the punishment. That I was just very upset and scared. I would not ground her or punish her for what she seems to not really have done on purpose.
Mary B
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