My bad bully day
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Today I had finally had it with some kids that have been bugging Dustin.
There are three boys and when two are put together they are mean to him.
A couple days ago this one boy Zack took his watch and threatened to also
take his bike. Dustin told him to knock it off and that he was a typical public
schooler bully.
He was upset that they where being mean and began to cry. The boy told him to
run home baby.
Today the other boy called him an F***ing A** hole and the Zack kid smashed
into his bike and messed up his front end.
Dustin came home all upset and told me. With in 15 minutes the nice boy
Jarred came by and told him to come back over. I explained nicely (Jarred stutters
when he gets nervous so I was really talking softly) that I was concerned
about what was happening and I want to make sure Dustin isn't being treated
poorly.
THEN.. the two other boys showed up and I told them that I was NOT going to
tolerate ANYONE touching him or his property. That we choose to Homeschool
because of bullies and public school crap and I'll be darned if I am going to
allow it or put up with it.
The kid Zack is sitting on his bike with a shit eaten grin on his face. I
said ZACK do you think this is funny??? I said as a matter a fact if I see or
find out this has continued I will be visiting your parents and oh by the way
maybe you both should go home and tell your parents exactly what I have said and
if they would like to discuss this have them come by I would love to talk with
them!
They left and later told my son I was a witch, lol. Then I guess the father
of the nice boy told them that if they couldn't be nice that they should stay
away also.
Who knows what will happen now. I actually stayed out in the yard with
Cassidy and Nicholas waiting for a parent to come by (pulled then in the wagon, not
stood and waited). I know who they are so no surprise to me.
I really hope this doesn't continue. I want to see my son happy and this just
totally broke his heart.
Laura D
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
There are three boys and when two are put together they are mean to him.
A couple days ago this one boy Zack took his watch and threatened to also
take his bike. Dustin told him to knock it off and that he was a typical public
schooler bully.
He was upset that they where being mean and began to cry. The boy told him to
run home baby.
Today the other boy called him an F***ing A** hole and the Zack kid smashed
into his bike and messed up his front end.
Dustin came home all upset and told me. With in 15 minutes the nice boy
Jarred came by and told him to come back over. I explained nicely (Jarred stutters
when he gets nervous so I was really talking softly) that I was concerned
about what was happening and I want to make sure Dustin isn't being treated
poorly.
THEN.. the two other boys showed up and I told them that I was NOT going to
tolerate ANYONE touching him or his property. That we choose to Homeschool
because of bullies and public school crap and I'll be darned if I am going to
allow it or put up with it.
The kid Zack is sitting on his bike with a shit eaten grin on his face. I
said ZACK do you think this is funny??? I said as a matter a fact if I see or
find out this has continued I will be visiting your parents and oh by the way
maybe you both should go home and tell your parents exactly what I have said and
if they would like to discuss this have them come by I would love to talk with
them!
They left and later told my son I was a witch, lol. Then I guess the father
of the nice boy told them that if they couldn't be nice that they should stay
away also.
Who knows what will happen now. I actually stayed out in the yard with
Cassidy and Nicholas waiting for a parent to come by (pulled then in the wagon, not
stood and waited). I know who they are so no surprise to me.
I really hope this doesn't continue. I want to see my son happy and this just
totally broke his heart.
Laura D
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Laura wrote: Today I had finally had it with some kids that have been bugging Dustin.
Raine replies: I have this same problem with my 12 yr. old son. It seems all the boys he comes into contact with are bullys. It's awful for him because, not only is he subjected to their abuse, but he has no friends. On occassion he has been so desperate for playmates that he has endured certain kids for a time (we put our foots down only with the ones who are physically abusive), but quickly decides it's simply not worthwhile.
Anyway, just thought it was interesting that this is not an isolated problem. What is happening to the boys in our culture to make them unable to be kind to each other??
Shalom,
Raine
**"What we learn to do, we learn by doing."
-Thomas Jefferson **
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Raine replies: I have this same problem with my 12 yr. old son. It seems all the boys he comes into contact with are bullys. It's awful for him because, not only is he subjected to their abuse, but he has no friends. On occassion he has been so desperate for playmates that he has endured certain kids for a time (we put our foots down only with the ones who are physically abusive), but quickly decides it's simply not worthwhile.
Anyway, just thought it was interesting that this is not an isolated problem. What is happening to the boys in our culture to make them unable to be kind to each other??
Shalom,
Raine
**"What we learn to do, we learn by doing."
-Thomas Jefferson **
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
I wrote: we put our foots down only with the ones who are physically abusive
ROFL! Ummm, yeah.. foots. Feets too... :o)
**"There is, on the whole, nothing on earth intended
for innocent people so horrible as a school."
- George Bernard Shaw**
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
ROFL! Ummm, yeah.. foots. Feets too... :o)
**"There is, on the whole, nothing on earth intended
for innocent people so horrible as a school."
- George Bernard Shaw**
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Have A Nice Day!
What is happening to the boys in our culture to make them unable to be kind to each other??<<<<<
Well, I'm running into the same problem here, only my son is caving to all the peer pressure to avoid the lonliness. It seems he has also been tolerating plenty of physical abuse in order to have someone to hang out with.
I just wish I knew what I could do to help him establish some good long-term, local friends.
Kristen
Well, I'm running into the same problem here, only my son is caving to all the peer pressure to avoid the lonliness. It seems he has also been tolerating plenty of physical abuse in order to have someone to hang out with.
I just wish I knew what I could do to help him establish some good long-term, local friends.
Kristen
----- Original Message -----
From: raineluvsj@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, June 13, 2003 12:38 AM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] My bad bully day
Laura wrote: Today I had finally had it with some kids that have been bugging Dustin.
Raine replies: I have this same problem with my 12 yr. old son. It seems all the boys he comes into contact with are bullys. It's awful for him because, not only is he subjected to their abuse, but he has no friends. On occassion he has been so desperate for playmates that he has endured certain kids for a time (we put our foots down only with the ones who are physically abusive), but quickly decides it's simply not worthwhile.
Anyway, just thought it was interesting that this is not an isolated problem. What is happening to the boys in our culture to make them unable to be kind to each other??
Shalom,
Raine
**"What we learn to do, we learn by doing."
-Thomas Jefferson **
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tim and Maureen
IMHO, Bullying comes from a lack of power to control oneself, so you control those you see as weaker. Hence, if school controlled where I had to sit, when I had use the loo, who I had to pass the ball to, then I controlled my lil brother when I got home. The more out-of-control I felt (which was made worse by my "feelings" nature, the more I needed to control him. If bullies beat me up, then I beat him up too. If I had to stay afterschool and do math problems, I made him miserable.
If my Dad was doing his usual 25 hour days catching poachers, then I watched TV and had no one around to model male behaviours. So I yelled "Gilligan" at my brother and whacked him repeatedly with my hat/toy/hand.
We lived in a town where the boys were esp. vicious for 2 years. Awful. Farming community in S. Alberta.
Other thots?
My (cultural) thots,
Tim T
If my Dad was doing his usual 25 hour days catching poachers, then I watched TV and had no one around to model male behaviours. So I yelled "Gilligan" at my brother and whacked him repeatedly with my hat/toy/hand.
We lived in a town where the boys were esp. vicious for 2 years. Awful. Farming community in S. Alberta.
Other thots?
My (cultural) thots,
Tim T
>What is happening to the boys in our culture to make them unable to be kind to each other??[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Heidi Wordhouse-Dykema
>I just wish I knew what I could do to help him establish some goodYou could always move in next to us!
>long-term, local friends.
HeidiWD
"Self-reliance is the antidote to institutional stupidity." JTGatto,
Monarch Notes guide to One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
Have A Nice Day!
LOL..thanks!
So far, I'm just taking it one day at a time. Each day I try to find things to keep them busy. Yesterday, I offered the brand spankin new lawn tractor to him so he could mow both yards. He took me up on it.
Today he is working.
Tomorrow is a picnic. Ok, thats 3 days covered LOL.
Where do you live??? I"m thinking as soon as I get the bills paid through July I'm going to start planning some trips for next year. Maybe I'll have to call upon all you unschooler hostesses that offered your homes for traveling unschoolers.
Might be fun!
Kristen
So far, I'm just taking it one day at a time. Each day I try to find things to keep them busy. Yesterday, I offered the brand spankin new lawn tractor to him so he could mow both yards. He took me up on it.
Today he is working.
Tomorrow is a picnic. Ok, thats 3 days covered LOL.
Where do you live??? I"m thinking as soon as I get the bills paid through July I'm going to start planning some trips for next year. Maybe I'll have to call upon all you unschooler hostesses that offered your homes for traveling unschoolers.
Might be fun!
Kristen
----- Original Message -----
From: Heidi Wordhouse-Dykema
To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, June 13, 2003 12:26 PM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] My bad bully day
>I just wish I knew what I could do to help him establish some good
>long-term, local friends.
You could always move in next to us!
HeidiWD
"Self-reliance is the antidote to institutional stupidity." JTGatto,
Monarch Notes guide to One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Heidi Wordhouse-Dykema
>Where do you live??? I"m thinking as soon as I get the bills paid throughCal-eee-Forn-eeah!
>July I'm going to start planning some trips for next year. Maybe I'll
>have to call upon all you unschooler hostesses that offered your homes for
>traveling unschoolers.
Full time in the Bay Area, part time in the middle of nowhere (northern
California!)
Unschooling folks are always welcome to visit our tiny but fabulous home -
and if they don't mind dirt, camping or showering surrounded by nothing but
a water tank, a few mosquitoes and a whole lotta space and mountains,
they're welcome up at the northernly space too! (...or, you could take a
really big bath in the Eel River if you don't like showers...)
Consider it an engraved invite.
HeidiWD
"Self-reliance is the antidote to institutional stupidity." JTGatto,
Monarch Notes guide to One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
[email protected]
In a message dated 6/12/03 10:39:37 PM, rainelovesj@... writes:
<< What is happening to the boys in our culture to make them unable to be
kind to each other?? >>
School?
<< What is happening to the boys in our culture to make them unable to be
kind to each other?? >>
School?