[email protected]

> >>>As we're speaking of conversation and interrupting;
> Our problem is different.....but a major annoyance
>
> The problem we have here - our neighbor upstairs has Aspergers - he's a
> text book case!
> He interrupts constantly - really.<<<


Janis--
I imagine it IS annoying to constantly be interrupted.

>>>He's been at our powwow tent - and walked up to me while a customer was
speaking - as soon as there's any pause - like someone asked a question and
someone else hasn't actually started to speak - he talks.<<<

I've read everything I could get my eyes on concerning autism. From this,
I've learned that social contact, including conversing, can be bewildering
for someone with Aspergers. He may have difficulty reading your "cues".
Perhaps, from his "experience" with conversations, he's deduced that when one
person stops talking, it's time for someone else (him) to begin.
If you have several years to spare, you can start reading here:
<A HREF="http://www.isn.net/~jypsy/autilink.htm">The MAZE - Ooops... Wrong Planet! Syndrome Master Link Page</A>

>>>>Brianna doesn't know what to do.
Should she answer him?
If we ignore him. he repeats and repeats and gets louder.<<<<

Me personally? I'd talk to him. Introduce him to your aunt. At the pow
wow? I'd acknowledge him, finish business, then talk to him. (John! Nice
to see you here! I can talk to you as soon as I finish talking to this
gentleman.)

My son has some autistic behaviors. Any conversation starter from "Are you
taking the bus to town?" to "No school today?" will be met with a monologue,
usually about trains. Often he'll initiate the "conversation" himself.
Some people--a few neighbors, the cashier at the grocery store--talk to him
like he's a human being. One bank teller looks through him like he's
invisible. I seethed for a few weeks, couldn't take it anymore, and told
her, clearly and distinctly, "He's talking to you." (He wasn't interrupting
anyone here. He started talking to her, and she never looked at him,
answered him, or acknowledged him in any way.)

>>>There are others who do that - 'cross conversing" or "cross interrupting"
...gads ....I hate it!
It is rude and annoying,<<<

If we're still talking about the same guy, he's not trying to be rude.
Really. As for the "others"--I don't know enough about the circumstances to
offer an opinion.

Sometimes it's hard to know how to act around someone who's "different". I'm
glad you asked.

Mary J




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

coyote's corner

Hi,
Thanks so much for your insight.
We do introduce him to folks - again sometimes it's hard. I know he doesn't mean to do/say these things - but it's hard.

He's an adult male and there have been a few instances where he was going to get hurt !

But I will try that one about acknowledging him at powwow (in front of the customer)

Thanks again.
You know, he's a sweetheart, but he can be very annoying.

Thanks again,
Janis
PS - my older children & I used to shop at a market in Prov. One of the butchers developed a little crush on me. Whenever we went in, he would leave his counter and walk around the store with me. He ignored my kids. Usually, he didn't acknowledge them w/ anything more than a nod. One day, my youngest, JL, asked him a question - point blank. The guy ignored - totally! JL asked again. Again, he was ignored. His sister, my oldest ( she was around 5-6; said "Excuse me, Mr. Butcher Man. Our Mommy isn't going to go out with you" Well, that got his attention. He looked down at her - my two kids were looking right up at him. He asked "And how do you know that?"
Channa said "Our mommy won't waste her time on anyone that doesn't 'spect us"
She looked at me and said "Isn't that right Mommy?"
I smiled and said "Yes, sweetheart - that's exactly right."

I hate it when adults ignore kids. We see so much of that. How can kids think well of themselves if their parents accept other folks disrespecting them??

Okay, let me get off my soap box before I trip and hurt myself!

Janis
----- Original Message -----
From: mc1mommy@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, May 17, 2003 9:27 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] annoying neighbor



> >>>As we're speaking of conversation and interrupting;
> Our problem is different.....but a major annoyance
>
> The problem we have here - our neighbor upstairs has Aspergers - he's a
> text book case!
> He interrupts constantly - really.<<<


Janis--
I imagine it IS annoying to constantly be interrupted.

>>>He's been at our powwow tent - and walked up to me while a customer was
speaking - as soon as there's any pause - like someone asked a question and
someone else hasn't actually started to speak - he talks.<<<

I've read everything I could get my eyes on concerning autism. From this,
I've learned that social contact, including conversing, can be bewildering
for someone with Aspergers. He may have difficulty reading your "cues".
Perhaps, from his "experience" with conversations, he's deduced that when one
person stops talking, it's time for someone else (him) to begin.
If you have several years to spare, you can start reading here:
<A HREF="http://www.isn.net/~jypsy/autilink.htm">The MAZE - Ooops... Wrong Planet! Syndrome Master Link Page</A>

>>>>Brianna doesn't know what to do.
Should she answer him?
If we ignore him. he repeats and repeats and gets louder.<<<<

Me personally? I'd talk to him. Introduce him to your aunt. At the pow
wow? I'd acknowledge him, finish business, then talk to him. (John! Nice
to see you here! I can talk to you as soon as I finish talking to this
gentleman.)

My son has some autistic behaviors. Any conversation starter from "Are you
taking the bus to town?" to "No school today?" will be met with a monologue,
usually about trains. Often he'll initiate the "conversation" himself.
Some people--a few neighbors, the cashier at the grocery store--talk to him
like he's a human being. One bank teller looks through him like he's
invisible. I seethed for a few weeks, couldn't take it anymore, and told
her, clearly and distinctly, "He's talking to you." (He wasn't interrupting
anyone here. He started talking to her, and she never looked at him,
answered him, or acknowledged him in any way.)

>>>There are others who do that - 'cross conversing" or "cross interrupting"
...gads ....I hate it!
It is rude and annoying,<<<

If we're still talking about the same guy, he's not trying to be rude.
Really. As for the "others"--I don't know enough about the circumstances to
offer an opinion.

Sometimes it's hard to know how to act around someone who's "different". I'm
glad you asked.

Mary J




[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

In a message dated 5/17/2003 10:21:19 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
jana@... writes:


> "Excuse me, Mr. Butcher Man. Our Mommy isn't going to go out with you" Well,
> that got his attention. He looked down at her - my two kids were looking
> right up at him. He asked "And how do you know that?"
> Channa said "Our mommy won't waste her time on anyone that doesn't 'spect
> us"
> She looked at me and said "Isn't that right Mommy?"
>

PERFECT!

~Kelly


[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]