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I think Jennifer's email speaks volumes. Learn to trust your own inner
judgment. If something about the child and the family "bother" you, even if
you can't exactly nail what it is, your innate judgment is trying to protect
you and your family. Trust it! Keep your distance from the entity that
gives you bad vibes. While you don't want to be mean to the neighbor child,
you want to protect and nurture YOUR CHILD, first and foremost. Always keep
the focus on that. . . .

Susan

In a message dated 5/7/2003 11:11:42 PM Central Standard Time,
jmcseals@... writes:

> <<<Any of you ever deal with the friend issues and what did you do? Do I
> speak
> or zip it?>>>
>
> This is extremely long, but here goes...
>
> My daughter had a friend, E, that lived just around the corner. They
> became
> friends around the age of 8 or so. E always made me feel uncomfortable.
> She was a bit overbearing and pushy which irritated me a lot of the time,
> but it never seemed to bother Haleigh at all. I'd ask if 'xyz' bothered
> her
> and most of the time she acted like she had no idea what I was talking
> about. There were a lot of little things that bothered me about E, so I
> figured it was my own biases or experiences that were coming through...not
> really reflecting E so much as myself.
>
> For example: E always 'picked' at her crotch. Somewhat like picking a
> wedgie but in a constant, obvious kind of way and up front, not behind. I
> know children who are sexually abused ten to have these sort of reactions
> and that thought never left my mind. She was also always dirty, wore
> clothes that were either way too big or way too small. She was overweight
> and had very large breasts, in proportion to her overall size and never
> wore
> a training bra. She really needed one. Much of the time, her breasts were
>
> exposed through huge armholes of shirts without sleeves.
>
> There were other things that bothered us as well...my husband and I. She
> made a very big deal about whispering and telling secrets. I realize girls
>
> love to do these things and it is quite normal. However, there seemed to
> be
> something different about it with E. Not really something I could put my
> finger on, but something my husband and I just couldn't get past.
>
> She was ALWAYS at our house. She



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