Re: Spank Out Day..lost childhood memories
[email protected]
Spank Out Day!
I was spanked/whiped with a belt when I was little for pooping my pants.
Every time I pooped I was sent to my room and told to pull my pants down and
my Dad came in a hut me with his belt. When he was drinking he would
sometimes use the buckle end unknowingly.
One night he made me sit on the potty for hours on end. He would keep coming
in and asking me if I went yet. Mom who at the time was working nights came
home at 2am to me still there dazed. She tells me I was out of it in her
words.
I eventually just stopped pooping. After a couple months I finally got sick
enough and they noticed I hadn't gone. I was in Boston Children's Hospital
for two weeks at seven and once at ten. The second for dehydration I have no
idea why?
My Parents got divorced and all was good until I was 12 and I ended up living
with him because my Mother remarried, had another child and we (my sister and
I) where old news. The last day my Father touched me was when I was running
out of his house after he had tried to strangle me, picked me up by my hair
and pulled a good clump out. My father and Step mother where both running
after me but I ran out the door to a neighbor.
I am now 32 with three of my own. My sister with four. We both broke the
cycle in our family by being there for each other.
My parents where good people otherwise. My dad knows now the damage he did. I
am fine now but I dont recall any of my child hood I blocked most of it out.
I can only recall pieces when I look at photo's or when I am in conversation
with them and they say you don't remember this and that? Ahh, no I dont.
We have friends that are religious (Their church advocates this) who spank
and for stupid things. Why do people hit their kids to get them to stop
hitting what's up with that!
Sorry for the depressing story, someday I will find my way to help others to
stop damaging their children.
Laura
Maine
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I was spanked/whiped with a belt when I was little for pooping my pants.
Every time I pooped I was sent to my room and told to pull my pants down and
my Dad came in a hut me with his belt. When he was drinking he would
sometimes use the buckle end unknowingly.
One night he made me sit on the potty for hours on end. He would keep coming
in and asking me if I went yet. Mom who at the time was working nights came
home at 2am to me still there dazed. She tells me I was out of it in her
words.
I eventually just stopped pooping. After a couple months I finally got sick
enough and they noticed I hadn't gone. I was in Boston Children's Hospital
for two weeks at seven and once at ten. The second for dehydration I have no
idea why?
My Parents got divorced and all was good until I was 12 and I ended up living
with him because my Mother remarried, had another child and we (my sister and
I) where old news. The last day my Father touched me was when I was running
out of his house after he had tried to strangle me, picked me up by my hair
and pulled a good clump out. My father and Step mother where both running
after me but I ran out the door to a neighbor.
I am now 32 with three of my own. My sister with four. We both broke the
cycle in our family by being there for each other.
My parents where good people otherwise. My dad knows now the damage he did. I
am fine now but I dont recall any of my child hood I blocked most of it out.
I can only recall pieces when I look at photo's or when I am in conversation
with them and they say you don't remember this and that? Ahh, no I dont.
We have friends that are religious (Their church advocates this) who spank
and for stupid things. Why do people hit their kids to get them to stop
hitting what's up with that!
Sorry for the depressing story, someday I will find my way to help others to
stop damaging their children.
Laura
Maine
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
marji
At 20:59 4/28/03 -0400, Laura wrote:
telling it could not have been easy. Thanks for doing it.
Marji
P.S. I heard someone say very recently (my foggy brain doesn't remember
who - sorry!) that we are all doing the best we can with the choices we
have available to us at the time; what we all need is to be able see that
there are, or at least may be, more choices. I don't believe that can
excuse people for heinous behavior, but sometimes I think it might be good
to know.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>Sorry for the depressing story, someday I will find my way to help others toLaura, if your gut-wrenching story doesn't do it, nothing will! Just
>stop damaging their children.
telling it could not have been easy. Thanks for doing it.
Marji
P.S. I heard someone say very recently (my foggy brain doesn't remember
who - sorry!) that we are all doing the best we can with the choices we
have available to us at the time; what we all need is to be able see that
there are, or at least may be, more choices. I don't believe that can
excuse people for heinous behavior, but sometimes I think it might be good
to know.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Olga
--- In [email protected], HMSL2@a... wrote:
same with us. Although I never had bruises, it didn't help my pride
any! So I hear you!
I have a friend who attended a religious "class" on parenting. Their
solution was to take the child out for a reminder, i.e. spanking.
Apparently, she never spanks them for doing something wrong like
throwing something. Instead, they are always told they get spanked
soley for disobeying mom. Okay, am I the only one that sees a
probelm with this. These children will certinaly not be independent
thinkers and how can they possibly make moral evaluations. How can
you have a discussion with your child about making better choices
when the only option is Mom. It is just a bit scary to me!
Olga
> Spank Out Day!help others to
>
> > Sorry for the depressing story, someday I will find my way to
> stop damaging their children.Thanks for sharing with us. My Dad was beaten as a child and did the
>
> Laura
> Maine
>
same with us. Although I never had bruises, it didn't help my pride
any! So I hear you!
I have a friend who attended a religious "class" on parenting. Their
solution was to take the child out for a reminder, i.e. spanking.
Apparently, she never spanks them for doing something wrong like
throwing something. Instead, they are always told they get spanked
soley for disobeying mom. Okay, am I the only one that sees a
probelm with this. These children will certinaly not be independent
thinkers and how can they possibly make moral evaluations. How can
you have a discussion with your child about making better choices
when the only option is Mom. It is just a bit scary to me!
Olga
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
coyote's corner
Laura,
Thank you o very much. Telling this took much courage and much love.
I send you all the healing I can.
There is a saying - From evil can come much good.
Obviously - you have proven this true.
Peace,
Healing,
Love,
Janis
Thank you o very much. Telling this took much courage and much love.
I send you all the healing I can.
There is a saying - From evil can come much good.
Obviously - you have proven this true.
Peace,
Healing,
Love,
Janis
----- Original Message -----
From: HMSL2@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Monday, April 28, 2003 8:59 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: Spank Out Day..lost childhood memories
Spank Out Day!
I was spanked/whiped with a belt when I was little for pooping my pants.
Every time I pooped I was sent to my room and told to pull my pants down and
my Dad came in a hut me with his belt. When he was drinking he would
sometimes use the buckle end unknowingly.
One night he made me sit on the potty for hours on end. He would keep coming
in and asking me if I went yet. Mom who at the time was working nights came
home at 2am to me still there dazed. She tells me I was out of it in her
words.
I eventually just stopped pooping. After a couple months I finally got sick
enough and they noticed I hadn't gone. I was in Boston Children's Hospital
for two weeks at seven and once at ten. The second for dehydration I have no
idea why?
My Parents got divorced and all was good until I was 12 and I ended up living
with him because my Mother remarried, had another child and we (my sister and
I) where old news. The last day my Father touched me was when I was running
out of his house after he had tried to strangle me, picked me up by my hair
and pulled a good clump out. My father and Step mother where both running
after me but I ran out the door to a neighbor.
I am now 32 with three of my own. My sister with four. We both broke the
cycle in our family by being there for each other.
My parents where good people otherwise. My dad knows now the damage he did. I
am fine now but I dont recall any of my child hood I blocked most of it out.
I can only recall pieces when I look at photo's or when I am in conversation
with them and they say you don't remember this and that? Ahh, no I dont.
We have friends that are religious (Their church advocates this) who spank
and for stupid things. Why do people hit their kids to get them to stop
hitting what's up with that!
Sorry for the depressing story, someday I will find my way to help others to
stop damaging their children.
Laura
Maine
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
MARK and JULIE SOLICH
>Okay, how's this for scary. I was lent a homeschooling book. I knew it was
> I have a friend who attended a religious "class" on parenting. Their
> solution was to take the child out for a reminder, i.e. spanking.
> Apparently, she never spanks them for doing something wrong like
> throwing something. Instead, they are always told they get spanked
> soley for disobeying mom. Okay, am I the only one that sees a
> probelm with this. These children will certinaly not be independent
> thinkers and how can they possibly make moral evaluations. How can
> you have a discussion with your child about making better choices
> when the only option is Mom. It is just a bit scary to me!
>
> Olga
going to be awful from the first page but read it till the bitter end. Page
135, The Swat Chart
Causing Trouble = 1 swat, aggressive behaviour (hitting, biting etc) = 3
swats, name calling = 2 swats but bad language = 10 swats.
Moral of the story, hit your brother if you have to, but don't freakin
swear!!!
It's insane. How can kids trust their parents to help them make *good*
choices when their parents are stupid!
Julie
> > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]the moderator, Joyce Fetteroll (fetteroll@...), or the list owner,
>
>
>
> ~~~~ Don't forget! If you change topics, change the subject line! ~~~~
>
> If you have questions, concerns or problems with this list, please email
Helen Hegener (HEM-Editor@...).
>email to:
> To unsubscribe from this group, click on the following link or address an
> [email protected]
>
> Visit the Unschooling website: http://www.unschooling.com
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/29/03 8:06:54 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
mjsolich@... writes:
homeschooling mom I know gets her stuff. She puts a number of swats to every
offense. Just like this chart
Pam G.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
mjsolich@... writes:
> Okay, how's this for scary. I was lent a homeschooling book. I knew it wasOh my word. I didn't know their was a chart. Maybe that is where this
> going to be awful from the first page but read it till the bitter end. Page
> 135, The Swat Chart
> Causing Trouble = 1 swat, aggressive behaviour (hitting, biting etc) = 3
> swats, name calling = 2 swats but bad language = 10 swats.
> Moral of the story, hit your brother if you have to, but don't freakin
> swear!!!
>
homeschooling mom I know gets her stuff. She puts a number of swats to every
offense. Just like this chart
Pam G.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/29/2003 1:29:48 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
britcontoo@... writes:
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
britcontoo@... writes:
> Apparently, she never spanks them for doing something wrong likeShe's raising liers. Natural consequence of spanking.
> throwing something. Instead, they are always told they get spanked
> soley for disobeying mom. Okay, am I the only one that sees a
> probelm with this. These children will certinaly not be independent
> thinkers and how can they possibly make moral evaluations. How can
> you have a discussion with your child about making better choices
> when the only option is Mom. It is just a bit scary to me!
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/29/03 5:54:59 PM Eastern Daylight Time, genant2@...
writes:
herself.. LOL. ..
Teresa
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
writes:
> Oh my word. I didn't know their was a chart. Maybe that is where thisYep, I bet you're right.. Surely she didnt make that elaborate plan up all by
> homeschooling mom I know gets her stuff. She puts a number of swats to
> every
> offense. Just like this chart
> Pam G.
>
herself.. LOL. ..
Teresa
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/29/2003 5:38:18 PM Central Daylight Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
their obedience to God. They don't need any independent thinking, because
God is going to tell them everything they need to do.
Little do they know....
Tuck
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
> Apparently, she never spanks them for doing something wrong likeWhat she *thinks* she's doing is raising kids who will automatically transfer
> >throwing something. Instead, they are always told they get spanked
> >soley for disobeying mom. Okay, am I the only one that sees a
> >probelm with this. These children will certinaly not be independent
> >thinkers and how can they possibly make moral evaluations. How can
> >you have a discussion with your child about making better choices
> >when the only option is Mom. It is just a bit scary to me!
>
> She's raising liers. Natural consequence of spanking.
>
their obedience to God. They don't need any independent thinking, because
God is going to tell them everything they need to do.
Little do they know....
Tuck
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/29/03 3:54:53 PM, genant2@... writes:
<< She puts a number of swats to every
offense. Just like this chart >>
My mom put a number of swats to every offense. Even tattling.
She pulled those numbers out of her butt.
"Never hit in anger," and she was proud of that little principle, but if she
was angry when she passed sentence you got five instead of two, and come to
think of it she was usually angry (or at least agitated) if it was earlier in
the day than the time she had decided was okay to start drinking (which
backed up earlier in the day as years went by, naturally) or if she was out
of beer.
It's stupid. No amount of mental contortion or justification makes it smart.
Sandra
<< She puts a number of swats to every
offense. Just like this chart >>
My mom put a number of swats to every offense. Even tattling.
She pulled those numbers out of her butt.
"Never hit in anger," and she was proud of that little principle, but if she
was angry when she passed sentence you got five instead of two, and come to
think of it she was usually angry (or at least agitated) if it was earlier in
the day than the time she had decided was okay to start drinking (which
backed up earlier in the day as years went by, naturally) or if she was out
of beer.
It's stupid. No amount of mental contortion or justification makes it smart.
Sandra