Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: balance/sex on tv
[email protected]
In a message dated 09/04/2003 19:34:23 Pacific Daylight Time,
wenrom31@... writes:
son is 7, and he asked me to get rid of the picture for April on our
calendar. It is a painting byMaxfield Parrish, called Egypt. It depicts two
female nudes by a pool, one pre-adolescent, one woman. Neither is full on.
Quite beautiful. I asked why, and he said it just made him feel
uncomfortable, he wasn't sure why. I asked if he could find a way to see the
beauty, or atleast just put up with it for a while and see what he thought
about it later. This boy has always been Very modest about nudity.(his). We
are nude a lot in this house(hideous mental picture time, Maureen!!) and I am
not sure why he is so not into his own nudity. Even as a very little guy was
uncomfortable with being naked. Has explored with his buddy, is somewhat
curious, but very reserved.
I don't think it is anything we have done because his sister is the nudity
queen!
Just wondering, in light of the conversations. Any ideas?
Nancy, in PG
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
wenrom31@... writes:
> ?") He is actually moreDon't these children come with their own feelings about sexuality as well? My
> comfortable with sexuality than I am for him. I just
son is 7, and he asked me to get rid of the picture for April on our
calendar. It is a painting byMaxfield Parrish, called Egypt. It depicts two
female nudes by a pool, one pre-adolescent, one woman. Neither is full on.
Quite beautiful. I asked why, and he said it just made him feel
uncomfortable, he wasn't sure why. I asked if he could find a way to see the
beauty, or atleast just put up with it for a while and see what he thought
about it later. This boy has always been Very modest about nudity.(his). We
are nude a lot in this house(hideous mental picture time, Maureen!!) and I am
not sure why he is so not into his own nudity. Even as a very little guy was
uncomfortable with being naked. Has explored with his buddy, is somewhat
curious, but very reserved.
I don't think it is anything we have done because his sister is the nudity
queen!
Just wondering, in light of the conversations. Any ideas?
Nancy, in PG
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/9/2003 10:34:02 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
wenrom31@... writes:
morning for me to put on the bus for school, this morning he shows up with
the DVD eight mile. I haven't seen it, I know it's the eminem movie, I
wonder if he's supposed to see it. I know his grandparents only let him
watch veggie tales when they watch him over the summer. So, I call his mom
at work, make him wait the hour until she gets in. Do you know Jordan
brought over the eight mile DVD? Yes, she says. Is he allowed to watch it?
Of course, he's seen it before. There's nothing bad in it except for a few
words. OK, she's his mother (although I feel like I've raised him since two,
really really absent mom) she's seen it, I haven't.
He's watching away, I bring him his breakfast and I notice he's furiously
trying to pause the movie every time I come near the doorway. I ask him
what's the problem, he first says he thinks he has it in the wrong "input".
Which of course I know nothing about and tell him to stop pushing the buttons
it was playing fine. Then I come back by and I SEE, there it is in living
color Eminem and the girl friend he asked out on Friday night going at it at
work. They are clothed, but the movements and sounds are very clear that sex
is happening in this corner and it's just totally close up on the upper body
and face so you get the full glorious experience.
That was a total panic moment. Obviously he KNEW about this part and was
trying to stop it before I saw it. Soooooo I picked up a magazine and looked
at it while I'm sure he sat nervously wondering if I was going to say
anything about it.
Awkward moment? Yes, longest three minutes I've had lately. But I guess it
was MY being uncomfortable with it. I guess he was a little embarassed about
it or he wouldn't have tried to let me NOT see that scene.
But I guess the real question is what kind of impact does it have on a child
to see or not see stuff like that? I don't know, I'm sure there are others
that do. I'm sure there are varying opinions on the subject.
I think probably the worst thing about it was the uncomfortable tension that
was in the room. Maybe had I KNOWN it was in the movie, maybe if he had
KNOWN I was going to take that particular time to sit down with him and
watch? Mabye the catching us both off guard is what made it uncomfortable.
I think I won't mention it to him at all. But I think I will probably be
watching it with him again and maybe take the opportunity to say something
like, well geez no wonder their relationship didn't last, look how it started
out, sex before you even had a first date! Then say no more about that scene
and leave it at that.
But I think you are right, it just might be OUR nervousness about this issue.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
wenrom31@... writes:
> I really have to snap out ofI know it's mostly my problem. My 9 year old neighbor comes over every
> it. For goodness sakes, he IS 11. When I was that age, I'm sure I
> was exposed to sex on TV. Maybe not as intense as nowadays, but who
> knows.
>
morning for me to put on the bus for school, this morning he shows up with
the DVD eight mile. I haven't seen it, I know it's the eminem movie, I
wonder if he's supposed to see it. I know his grandparents only let him
watch veggie tales when they watch him over the summer. So, I call his mom
at work, make him wait the hour until she gets in. Do you know Jordan
brought over the eight mile DVD? Yes, she says. Is he allowed to watch it?
Of course, he's seen it before. There's nothing bad in it except for a few
words. OK, she's his mother (although I feel like I've raised him since two,
really really absent mom) she's seen it, I haven't.
He's watching away, I bring him his breakfast and I notice he's furiously
trying to pause the movie every time I come near the doorway. I ask him
what's the problem, he first says he thinks he has it in the wrong "input".
Which of course I know nothing about and tell him to stop pushing the buttons
it was playing fine. Then I come back by and I SEE, there it is in living
color Eminem and the girl friend he asked out on Friday night going at it at
work. They are clothed, but the movements and sounds are very clear that sex
is happening in this corner and it's just totally close up on the upper body
and face so you get the full glorious experience.
That was a total panic moment. Obviously he KNEW about this part and was
trying to stop it before I saw it. Soooooo I picked up a magazine and looked
at it while I'm sure he sat nervously wondering if I was going to say
anything about it.
Awkward moment? Yes, longest three minutes I've had lately. But I guess it
was MY being uncomfortable with it. I guess he was a little embarassed about
it or he wouldn't have tried to let me NOT see that scene.
But I guess the real question is what kind of impact does it have on a child
to see or not see stuff like that? I don't know, I'm sure there are others
that do. I'm sure there are varying opinions on the subject.
I think probably the worst thing about it was the uncomfortable tension that
was in the room. Maybe had I KNOWN it was in the movie, maybe if he had
KNOWN I was going to take that particular time to sit down with him and
watch? Mabye the catching us both off guard is what made it uncomfortable.
I think I won't mention it to him at all. But I think I will probably be
watching it with him again and maybe take the opportunity to say something
like, well geez no wonder their relationship didn't last, look how it started
out, sex before you even had a first date! Then say no more about that scene
and leave it at that.
But I think you are right, it just might be OUR nervousness about this issue.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]