Nuclear families, was Re: handling conflict
Robin Clevenger
> From: "averyschmidt" <patti.schmidt2@...>I agree and we've really seen how well the tribe situation works when our
> I just want to say something else that I've been mulling over in my
> mind. Isolated nuclear families are a very recent development in
> human evolution. I don't think that it necessarily reflects poorly
> on a parent if the kids have a hard time of living in this way-
> being only around their siblings for days on end. If we lived in a
> tribe, or had a sense of an immediate larger community right outside
> our door, it would be different- there would always be another adult
> handy if two children who couldn't stand being together every
> instant *also* both wanted an adult's company. There would always
> be other children as buffers and distractions.
group of homeschoolers goes camping together (which is usually at least once
a week during the summer). With the tents in a big circle and the kids
roaming in the grass and trees and sand and streams, there's rarely a harsh
word said or a need to intervene in anything. The moms can cook, clean,
chat, read books, it's so stress-free! Just glance up and make sure the kids
are all accounted for, put a bandaid on a hurt knee or snuggle with a kid in
a chair who wants their mom and then they run back to the group or groups of
kids. I'm always amazed at how few problems there are between kids in a
tribe situation. Put those same kids and same loving moms in an isolated
house for just a few hours and all hell breaks loose. I just don't think
we're meant to live that way.
We're fortunate in that we're part of an "intentional neighborhood" where we
know our neighbors, have weekly potlucks and get-togethers, etc. The kids
all know all the adults and feel safe going in and out of houses. I think it
makes a huge difference when children feel that they're a part of a larger
community.
Blue Skies!
-Robin-
litlrooh
Your intentional community sounds wonderful. I wish there were more
of those. I could really get into that!
We've lost so much of the "personal touch" in this world we live in
today. Being "anonymous" makes it much easier for kids to think
nobody really cares what they do....which can and does lead to
trouble.
Kristen
--- In [email protected], "Robin Clevenger"
<diamondair@e...> wrote:
of those. I could really get into that!
We've lost so much of the "personal touch" in this world we live in
today. Being "anonymous" makes it much easier for kids to think
nobody really cares what they do....which can and does lead to
trouble.
Kristen
--- In [email protected], "Robin Clevenger"
<diamondair@e...> wrote:
> > From: "averyschmidt" <patti.schmidt2@v...>my
> > I just want to say something else that I've been mulling over in
> > mind. Isolated nuclear families are a very recent development inpoorly
> > human evolution. I don't think that it necessarily reflects
> > on a parent if the kids have a hard time of living in this way-a
> > being only around their siblings for days on end. If we lived in
> > tribe, or had a sense of an immediate larger community rightoutside
> > our door, it would be different- there would always be anotheradult
> > handy if two children who couldn't stand being together everywhen our
> > instant *also* both wanted an adult's company. There would always
> > be other children as buffers and distractions.
>
>
> I agree and we've really seen how well the tribe situation works
> group of homeschoolers goes camping together (which is usually atleast once
> a week during the summer). With the tents in a big circle and thekids
> roaming in the grass and trees and sand and streams, there's rarelya harsh
> word said or a need to intervene in anything. The moms can cook,clean,
> chat, read books, it's so stress-free! Just glance up and make surethe kids
> are all accounted for, put a bandaid on a hurt knee or snuggle witha kid in
> a chair who wants their mom and then they run back to the group orgroups of
> kids. I'm always amazed at how few problems there are between kidsin a
> tribe situation. Put those same kids and same loving moms in anisolated
> house for just a few hours and all hell breaks loose. I just don'tthink
> we're meant to live that way.where we
>
> We're fortunate in that we're part of an "intentional neighborhood"
> know our neighbors, have weekly potlucks and get-togethers, etc.The kids
> all know all the adults and feel safe going in and out of houses. Ithink it
> makes a huge difference when children feel that they're a part of alarger
> community.
>
> Blue Skies!
> -Robin-
Robin Clevenger
From: "litlrooh" <litlrooh@...>
the world. And each of them were started by people who felt community was
important. Living in a community was a choice for us, and living without
community is the choice most people in our society make, whether or not they
are aware that they have made that choice. Here's a website that has one
list of some of the hundreds of communities in the U.S. But it's not a
comprehensive list. I know there's at least 6 or 7 communities and cohousing
groups within our town of 140,000 people. They're out there!
it. We felt that we owed it to our children to intentionally choose to live
in community with our neighbors. The choice was not easy, and sometimes it
continues to not be easy. We enjoy the weekly potlucks and get-togethers, we
don't always enjoy the process of working through community issues by
consensus, but it's a learning experience. We enjoy knowing and appreciating
our neighbors, we don't always enjoy the financial strain we took on to move
away from big jobs and easy money to someplace where such things come much
harder. It all fits with the idea of unschooling and the post someone made
about their refridgerator quote - life is about the choices we make every
day. We choose unschooling, we choose community.
Blue Skies!
-Robin-
>Your intentional community sounds wonderful. I wish there were moreThere are tons of them, in every state of the U.S. and countries all over
>of those. I could really get into that!
the world. And each of them were started by people who felt community was
important. Living in a community was a choice for us, and living without
community is the choice most people in our society make, whether or not they
are aware that they have made that choice. Here's a website that has one
list of some of the hundreds of communities in the U.S. But it's not a
comprehensive list. I know there's at least 6 or 7 communities and cohousing
groups within our town of 140,000 people. They're out there!
>We've lost so much of the "personal touch" in this world we live in"We've" lost it as a society. But we as individuals can choose to reclaim
>today. Being "anonymous" makes it much easier for kids to think
>nobody really cares what they do....which can and does lead to
>trouble.
it. We felt that we owed it to our children to intentionally choose to live
in community with our neighbors. The choice was not easy, and sometimes it
continues to not be easy. We enjoy the weekly potlucks and get-togethers, we
don't always enjoy the process of working through community issues by
consensus, but it's a learning experience. We enjoy knowing and appreciating
our neighbors, we don't always enjoy the financial strain we took on to move
away from big jobs and easy money to someplace where such things come much
harder. It all fits with the idea of unschooling and the post someone made
about their refridgerator quote - life is about the choices we make every
day. We choose unschooling, we choose community.
Blue Skies!
-Robin-
Marjorie Kirk
The web site didn't come through, could you re-post it please?
Marjorie
Here's a website that has one
list of some of the hundreds of communities in the U.S. But it's not a
comprehensive list.
Marjorie
Here's a website that has one
list of some of the hundreds of communities in the U.S. But it's not a
comprehensive list.
Have a Nice Day!
Thanks for the information!
I didn't see the website link though. Can you repost?
THanks!
Kristen
I didn't see the website link though. Can you repost?
THanks!
Kristen
----- Original Message -----
From: Robin Clevenger
To: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, April 05, 2003 10:02 AM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: Nuclear families, was Re: handling conflict
From: "litlrooh" <litlrooh@...>
>Your intentional community sounds wonderful. I wish there were more
>of those. I could really get into that!
There are tons of them, in every state of the U.S. and countries all over
the world. And each of them were started by people who felt community was
important. Living in a community was a choice for us, and living without
community is the choice most people in our society make, whether or not they
are aware that they have made that choice. Here's a website that has one
list of some of the hundreds of communities in the U.S. But it's not a
comprehensive list. I know there's at least 6 or 7 communities and cohousing
groups within our town of 140,000 people. They're out there!
>We've lost so much of the "personal touch" in this world we live in
>today. Being "anonymous" makes it much easier for kids to think
>nobody really cares what they do....which can and does lead to
>trouble.
"We've" lost it as a society. But we as individuals can choose to reclaim
it. We felt that we owed it to our children to intentionally choose to live
in community with our neighbors. The choice was not easy, and sometimes it
continues to not be easy. We enjoy the weekly potlucks and get-togethers, we
don't always enjoy the process of working through community issues by
consensus, but it's a learning experience. We enjoy knowing and appreciating
our neighbors, we don't always enjoy the financial strain we took on to move
away from big jobs and easy money to someplace where such things come much
harder. It all fits with the idea of unschooling and the post someone made
about their refridgerator quote - life is about the choices we make every
day. We choose unschooling, we choose community.
Blue Skies!
-Robin-
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