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In a message dated 2/3/03 1:06:50 PM Eastern Standard Time,
litlrooh@... writes:

> Anyway, the only way I seem to be able to maintain many of these kinds of
> friendships is just not to talk about what I do or how I do it, and not to
> have our kids spend time together, or at least under certain circumstances.
> I share very little of my philosophy with these people.
>
>

My brothers are that way. Children are property and of course they have
nothing intelligent to say they haven't been "taught that in school yet."
But I still have relationships with them. We live very far apart so I see
them only on vacations. We take regular vacations together every year or so.
I maintain the relationship by not being physically close with them. I
don't share my parenting philosophies unless they ask. I know people are
very sensitive about that and vacations are a time to be happy. And I ALWAYS
make sure that we stay at separate hotels. Without telling them of course.
But that allows my family time to be away from them. We also take vacations
to theme parks, etc., so there isn't a time where they would have to think
about "disciplining" my children. Have separate vehicles. Etc. That is how
I maintain my relationship.
Pam G.


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