"I'm not learning anything at home"
Have a Nice Day!
Ok,
My son told me today that he feels like he is not learning anything at home. He is 14. This was after I asked him if he wanted to go back to school next year (something he said he wanted to do earlier this year).
So, we had a discussion of sorts.
I pointed out all the things he *has* learned, and *how* he learned them. I explained that schools take 6 hours/day making a production of education because they have to do *something* for 6 hours or parents would be upset. But learning doesn't have to be like schools make it.
I pointed out that he could learn anything he wants at home, at any time he wants. At school he will be limited to a particular subject that the school or teacher chooses. I also made it clear that there is so much more out there to learn than what the schools teach.
He did say he doesn't want to spend 6 hours/day there.
I also explained that even if he goes to school, and he has a teacher giving him all kinds of information, it is *still* his responsibility to learn whatever it is *he* thinks he needs to learn.
I told him we could talk about what he was interested in and I could try to get whatever he needed, and I can continue exposing them to different ideas, but in the end, learning was *his* domain.
I pointed out other advantages too, like being able to work more hours and have more money (there's a big one!!).
I think he got it this time. When we've had discussions like this before, he always blamed me, like I didn't "flip his head open and dump all the necessary info in there" for him.
Then he said something like, "Well, I'm a fast learner anyway". I'm not sure what he meant by that in the context of our conversation, but it sure is a nice change from hearing "I'm dumb".
He still might go to school next year, and if he decides to go, thats fine with me. I think I have finally come to peace with the idea that the kids have to make their own decisions. When my daughter went back this year it was a struggle for me, but I'm glad she went. She has her *own* reasons for being home now.
I don't like the culture at school, but that culture is everywhere in some form or another. You can't control what they do when they leave your sight, and the older they get, the more often they can leave your sight and make their own choices.
You can only hope they'll talk to you and that they'll listen when you have something to say.
Kristen
****************************************************************
Today is even more important than tomorrow because "today" is a gift, and "tomorrow" might never come.
Today is where hope lives because today is when we can make things better than yesterday.
The only thing we can be sure of is today and life isn't worth living if it isn't lived in joy for as many moments of today as we can manage.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
My son told me today that he feels like he is not learning anything at home. He is 14. This was after I asked him if he wanted to go back to school next year (something he said he wanted to do earlier this year).
So, we had a discussion of sorts.
I pointed out all the things he *has* learned, and *how* he learned them. I explained that schools take 6 hours/day making a production of education because they have to do *something* for 6 hours or parents would be upset. But learning doesn't have to be like schools make it.
I pointed out that he could learn anything he wants at home, at any time he wants. At school he will be limited to a particular subject that the school or teacher chooses. I also made it clear that there is so much more out there to learn than what the schools teach.
He did say he doesn't want to spend 6 hours/day there.
I also explained that even if he goes to school, and he has a teacher giving him all kinds of information, it is *still* his responsibility to learn whatever it is *he* thinks he needs to learn.
I told him we could talk about what he was interested in and I could try to get whatever he needed, and I can continue exposing them to different ideas, but in the end, learning was *his* domain.
I pointed out other advantages too, like being able to work more hours and have more money (there's a big one!!).
I think he got it this time. When we've had discussions like this before, he always blamed me, like I didn't "flip his head open and dump all the necessary info in there" for him.
Then he said something like, "Well, I'm a fast learner anyway". I'm not sure what he meant by that in the context of our conversation, but it sure is a nice change from hearing "I'm dumb".
He still might go to school next year, and if he decides to go, thats fine with me. I think I have finally come to peace with the idea that the kids have to make their own decisions. When my daughter went back this year it was a struggle for me, but I'm glad she went. She has her *own* reasons for being home now.
I don't like the culture at school, but that culture is everywhere in some form or another. You can't control what they do when they leave your sight, and the older they get, the more often they can leave your sight and make their own choices.
You can only hope they'll talk to you and that they'll listen when you have something to say.
Kristen
****************************************************************
Today is even more important than tomorrow because "today" is a gift, and "tomorrow" might never come.
Today is where hope lives because today is when we can make things better than yesterday.
The only thing we can be sure of is today and life isn't worth living if it isn't lived in joy for as many moments of today as we can manage.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kayb85 <[email protected]>
Has he read the Teenage Liberation Handbook?
Sheila
--- In [email protected], Have a Nice Day!
<litlrooh@c...> wrote:
back to school next year (something he said he wanted to do earlier
this year).
of education because they have to do *something* for 6 hours or
parents would be upset. But learning doesn't have to be like schools
make it.
that the school or teacher chooses. I also made it clear that there
is so much more out there to learn than what the schools teach.
responsibility to learn whatever it is *he* thinks he needs to learn.
to different ideas, but in the end, learning was *his* domain.
dump all the necessary info in there" for him.
but it sure is a nice change from hearing "I'm dumb".
idea that the kids have to make their own decisions. When my
daughter went back this year it was a struggle for me, but I'm glad
she went. She has her *own* reasons for being home now.
leave your sight, and the older they get, the more often they can
leave your sight and make their own choices.
can manage.
Sheila
--- In [email protected], Have a Nice Day!
<litlrooh@c...> wrote:
> Ok,at home. He is 14. This was after I asked him if he wanted to go
>
> My son told me today that he feels like he is not learning anything
back to school next year (something he said he wanted to do earlier
this year).
>them. I explained that schools take 6 hours/day making a production
> So, we had a discussion of sorts.
>
> I pointed out all the things he *has* learned, and *how* he learned
of education because they have to do *something* for 6 hours or
parents would be upset. But learning doesn't have to be like schools
make it.
>time he wants. At school he will be limited to a particular subject
> I pointed out that he could learn anything he wants at home, at any
that the school or teacher chooses. I also made it clear that there
is so much more out there to learn than what the schools teach.
>teacher giving him all kinds of information, it is *still* his
> He did say he doesn't want to spend 6 hours/day there.
>
> I also explained that even if he goes to school, and he has a
responsibility to learn whatever it is *he* thinks he needs to learn.
>could try to get whatever he needed, and I can continue exposing them
> I told him we could talk about what he was interested in and I
to different ideas, but in the end, learning was *his* domain.
>hours and have more money (there's a big one!!).
> I pointed out other advantages too, like being able to work more
>before, he always blamed me, like I didn't "flip his head open and
> I think he got it this time. When we've had discussions like this
dump all the necessary info in there" for him.
>not sure what he meant by that in the context of our conversation,
> Then he said something like, "Well, I'm a fast learner anyway". I'm
but it sure is a nice change from hearing "I'm dumb".
>thats fine with me. I think I have finally come to peace with the
> He still might go to school next year, and if he decides to go,
idea that the kids have to make their own decisions. When my
daughter went back this year it was a struggle for me, but I'm glad
she went. She has her *own* reasons for being home now.
>in some form or another. You can't control what they do when they
> I don't like the culture at school, but that culture is everywhere
leave your sight, and the older they get, the more often they can
leave your sight and make their own choices.
>you have something to say.
> You can only hope they'll talk to you and that they'll listen when
>gift, and "tomorrow" might never come.
> Kristen
>
>
>
>
> ****************************************************************
>
> Today is even more important than tomorrow because "today" is a
>better than yesterday.
> Today is where hope lives because today is when we can make things
>living if it isn't lived in joy for as many moments of today as we
> The only thing we can be sure of is today and life isn't worth
can manage.
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Have a Nice Day!
No not yet. We don't have it and to get it from the library is an ordeal. I did check it out long ago, but that was before he would have been interested in it. I'll have to check it out again I guess.
It takes a few weeks to get hold of it.
Kristen
It takes a few weeks to get hold of it.
Kristen
----- Original Message -----
From: kayb85 <sheran@...>
To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, December 20, 2002 4:50 PM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: "I'm not learning anything at home"
Has he read the Teenage Liberation Handbook?
Sheila
--- In [email protected], Have a Nice Day!
<litlrooh@c...> wrote:
> Ok,
>
> My son told me today that he feels like he is not learning anything
at home. He is 14. This was after I asked him if he wanted to go
back to school next year (something he said he wanted to do earlier
this year).
>
> So, we had a discussion of sorts.
>
> I pointed out all the things he *has* learned, and *how* he learned
them. I explained that schools take 6 hours/day making a production
of education because they have to do *something* for 6 hours or
parents would be upset. But learning doesn't have to be like schools
make it.
>
> I pointed out that he could learn anything he wants at home, at any
time he wants. At school he will be limited to a particular subject
that the school or teacher chooses. I also made it clear that there
is so much more out there to learn than what the schools teach.
>
> He did say he doesn't want to spend 6 hours/day there.
>
> I also explained that even if he goes to school, and he has a
teacher giving him all kinds of information, it is *still* his
responsibility to learn whatever it is *he* thinks he needs to learn.
>
> I told him we could talk about what he was interested in and I
could try to get whatever he needed, and I can continue exposing them
to different ideas, but in the end, learning was *his* domain.
>
> I pointed out other advantages too, like being able to work more
hours and have more money (there's a big one!!).
>
> I think he got it this time. When we've had discussions like this
before, he always blamed me, like I didn't "flip his head open and
dump all the necessary info in there" for him.
>
> Then he said something like, "Well, I'm a fast learner anyway". I'm
not sure what he meant by that in the context of our conversation,
but it sure is a nice change from hearing "I'm dumb".
>
> He still might go to school next year, and if he decides to go,
thats fine with me. I think I have finally come to peace with the
idea that the kids have to make their own decisions. When my
daughter went back this year it was a struggle for me, but I'm glad
she went. She has her *own* reasons for being home now.
>
> I don't like the culture at school, but that culture is everywhere
in some form or another. You can't control what they do when they
leave your sight, and the older they get, the more often they can
leave your sight and make their own choices.
>
> You can only hope they'll talk to you and that they'll listen when
you have something to say.
>
> Kristen
>
>
>
>
> ****************************************************************
>
> Today is even more important than tomorrow because "today" is a
gift, and "tomorrow" might never come.
>
> Today is where hope lives because today is when we can make things
better than yesterday.
>
> The only thing we can be sure of is today and life isn't worth
living if it isn't lived in joy for as many moments of today as we
can manage.
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Gerard Westenberg
<I pointed out other advantages too, like being able to work more hours and have more money (there's a big one!!).>
Its been really important for my teens to have some things to do outside the home, without younger siblings. I don't know - independence? Makes their life interesting and school look boring. Things like volunteer work, part time work, regular games days with friends, etc. And I have offered money to teens if they read certain homeschool/teen books - the choice is theirs but books like Real Lives : 11 teenagers who don't go to School have a lot in them for teens and some of mine wouldn't read them on their own without an added incentive ( money!). Yet, reading these sorts of books gave them ideas.. and ammunition...Leonie W.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Its been really important for my teens to have some things to do outside the home, without younger siblings. I don't know - independence? Makes their life interesting and school look boring. Things like volunteer work, part time work, regular games days with friends, etc. And I have offered money to teens if they read certain homeschool/teen books - the choice is theirs but books like Real Lives : 11 teenagers who don't go to School have a lot in them for teens and some of mine wouldn't read them on their own without an added incentive ( money!). Yet, reading these sorts of books gave them ideas.. and ammunition...Leonie W.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]