Need help on finding the balance
[email protected]
In a message dated 12/11/02 3:14:13 PM Central Standard Time,
[email protected] writes:
<< And if the child is saying that he can't go
to sleep without mom laying with him first, that mom says, "If you
want me to lay with you, it has to be by 11 pm because after that
point I'll be too tired. Because one child might want to be up until
2 am but another child might want mom to get up at 7 am. >>
But that isn't setting arbitrary limits. That's telling them honestly what
your needs are.
If you're tired, no one is suggesting ignoring your body to do only what
other people want!
But arbitrary limits and bodily needs are two different things.
I tell my children when I'm going to bed and if they want me to lay down and
tuck them in, that's the time they need to come, or I'll fall asleep and
they're on their own.
And I ask Trevor to shut down the tv long enough for me to get the baby and
Sierra through the bedtime ritual if they're getting tired (or me). They need
a quiet calm house to help them settle in.
After they are tucked in then Trevor and Jared can do as they wish (although
Jared usually comes when I tuck babsy boy in, as he likes to cuddle too).
Last night I was a Grinch and sent everyone to their rooms so the main part
of the house would be quiet.
We had a hectic morning coming up, and I needed to have some prep
time.....none of them were told to go to sleep, just be in their rooms quiet.
I went to cuddle with them and they were all asleep!! Even Trevor.
I guess Gameboy just wasn't captivating enough! Funny how those kids with all
the options will just fall asleep when they could be doing something else! lol
Ren
"Knowledge will not always take the place of simple observation."
~Arnold Lobel
Unschooling support at pensacolaunschoolers.com
[email protected] writes:
<< And if the child is saying that he can't go
to sleep without mom laying with him first, that mom says, "If you
want me to lay with you, it has to be by 11 pm because after that
point I'll be too tired. Because one child might want to be up until
2 am but another child might want mom to get up at 7 am. >>
But that isn't setting arbitrary limits. That's telling them honestly what
your needs are.
If you're tired, no one is suggesting ignoring your body to do only what
other people want!
But arbitrary limits and bodily needs are two different things.
I tell my children when I'm going to bed and if they want me to lay down and
tuck them in, that's the time they need to come, or I'll fall asleep and
they're on their own.
And I ask Trevor to shut down the tv long enough for me to get the baby and
Sierra through the bedtime ritual if they're getting tired (or me). They need
a quiet calm house to help them settle in.
After they are tucked in then Trevor and Jared can do as they wish (although
Jared usually comes when I tuck babsy boy in, as he likes to cuddle too).
Last night I was a Grinch and sent everyone to their rooms so the main part
of the house would be quiet.
We had a hectic morning coming up, and I needed to have some prep
time.....none of them were told to go to sleep, just be in their rooms quiet.
I went to cuddle with them and they were all asleep!! Even Trevor.
I guess Gameboy just wasn't captivating enough! Funny how those kids with all
the options will just fall asleep when they could be doing something else! lol
Ren
"Knowledge will not always take the place of simple observation."
~Arnold Lobel
Unschooling support at pensacolaunschoolers.com