La Leche League
Judy
that is such a shame, Myranda. You must have felt really crappy leaving
that Meeting.
I must add that I have been attending Meetings for 23 years ( yes,
years) and have not ever seen anything even remotely like that take place.
I have seen some women, who are so excited and passionate about their
babies, get more than a bit boisterous about the benefits of
breastfeeding. These are women who attend Meetings and a Leader never
knows what the make -up of a Meeting will be as they are open to the public.
It is the LLL Leaders' responsibility to lead the Meeting in such a way
that everyone's needs are met. Much easier said than done! but LLLI
Philosophy is certainly accepting of every woman's choices. Leaders
study a long time, attend sessions on communication skills, keep their
knowledge of research current, all on a volunteer basis, in order to
*prevent* what happened during the Meeting you attended.
Most of the women in the local Groups here are working Moms and some
have chosen to supplement with formula during their absences. I have
seen many single mothers whose babies spent time with their fathers away
from mom...women who nursed one twin and not the other.....
There are as many situations as there are babies; yet each Mother is
always treated with respect. *You* know what is best for your family and
you should not have been judged in any way.
I am so sorry that you had that experience....I can guarantee you would
not be treated that way at any Meeting near me. and it is likely that
you could have returned to that Group and met with an entirely different
gathering of Mothers and had the wonderful experience most people have
when they find LLL. I distinctly remember the first time I attended one-
I was pregnant with my 2nd, had weaned the first early ... no one said
a word about my past experiences but they did offer vast amounts of
information that made my breastfeeding relationship with the new baby
wonderful.
La Leche League is the 'World's Foremost Authority ' on breastfeeding, I
hope you will use the information the organization has available if you
should ever need it.
Fondly, Judy
Myranda wrote:
that Meeting.
I must add that I have been attending Meetings for 23 years ( yes,
years) and have not ever seen anything even remotely like that take place.
I have seen some women, who are so excited and passionate about their
babies, get more than a bit boisterous about the benefits of
breastfeeding. These are women who attend Meetings and a Leader never
knows what the make -up of a Meeting will be as they are open to the public.
It is the LLL Leaders' responsibility to lead the Meeting in such a way
that everyone's needs are met. Much easier said than done! but LLLI
Philosophy is certainly accepting of every woman's choices. Leaders
study a long time, attend sessions on communication skills, keep their
knowledge of research current, all on a volunteer basis, in order to
*prevent* what happened during the Meeting you attended.
Most of the women in the local Groups here are working Moms and some
have chosen to supplement with formula during their absences. I have
seen many single mothers whose babies spent time with their fathers away
from mom...women who nursed one twin and not the other.....
There are as many situations as there are babies; yet each Mother is
always treated with respect. *You* know what is best for your family and
you should not have been judged in any way.
I am so sorry that you had that experience....I can guarantee you would
not be treated that way at any Meeting near me. and it is likely that
you could have returned to that Group and met with an entirely different
gathering of Mothers and had the wonderful experience most people have
when they find LLL. I distinctly remember the first time I attended one-
I was pregnant with my 2nd, had weaned the first early ... no one said
a word about my past experiences but they did offer vast amounts of
information that made my breastfeeding relationship with the new baby
wonderful.
La Leche League is the 'World's Foremost Authority ' on breastfeeding, I
hope you will use the information the organization has available if you
should ever need it.
Fondly, Judy
Myranda wrote:
> Be careful what you say if you go to their meetings! I formula-fed[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> both my boys because I had to work full time. When I had my third
> baby, I had been staying home for over 4 years, so I wanted to
> breastfeed her. I went to a meeting.... they asked about how I'd fed
> the boys, and I told them. The rest of the meeting was spent with them
> attacking my choices and telling me what a bad mom I was. Absolutely
> no support for me wanting to breastfeed now, no help or advice,
> nothing. Just criticism for past choices. I was almost in tears by the
> time I left.
> Myranda
>
> From: Judy
> attending LL Meetings is a must do while pregnant
> and the LLLI website is VERY helpful:
>
> http://lalecheleague.org/
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
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>
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Myranda
Thanks Judy! One of the worst things was that it was the leader who started the criticism. She asked why I had formula fed, then went on to tell me that I should have done my homework about it, because I could have and should have still nursed at night. Then I said they both slept through the night starting at two months, and everyone jumped in about how I must have let them cry til they just gave up and slept (not true) and about how I dehydrated them, and several other things I don't remember now. The leader just sat there quietly frowning at me after the others started in. Three of them were in agreement that I wouldn't have enough dedication to nurse my new baby, and insinuated that I was wasting their time by coming. I'm glad to hear not everyone's like they were!!!
Myranda
that is such a shame, Myranda. You must have felt really crappy leaving
that Meeting.
I must add that I have been attending Meetings for 23 years ( yes,
years) and have not ever seen anything even remotely like that take place.
I have seen some women, who are so excited and passionate about their
babies, get more than a bit boisterous about the benefits of
breastfeeding. These are women who attend Meetings and a Leader never
knows what the make -up of a Meeting will be as they are open to the public.
It is the LLL Leaders' responsibility to lead the Meeting in such a way
that everyone's needs are met. Much easier said than done! but LLLI
Philosophy is certainly accepting of every woman's choices. Leaders
study a long time, attend sessions on communication skills, keep their
knowledge of research current, all on a volunteer basis, in order to
*prevent* what happened during the Meeting you attended.
Most of the women in the local Groups here are working Moms and some
have chosen to supplement with formula during their absences. I have
seen many single mothers whose babies spent time with their fathers away
from mom...women who nursed one twin and not the other.....
There are as many situations as there are babies; yet each Mother is
always treated with respect. *You* know what is best for your family and
you should not have been judged in any way.
I am so sorry that you had that experience....I can guarantee you would
not be treated that way at any Meeting near me. and it is likely that
you could have returned to that Group and met with an entirely different
gathering of Mothers and had the wonderful experience most people have
when they find LLL. I distinctly remember the first time I attended one-
I was pregnant with my 2nd, had weaned the first early ... no one said
a word about my past experiences but they did offer vast amounts of
information that made my breastfeeding relationship with the new baby
wonderful.
La Leche League is the 'World's Foremost Authority ' on breastfeeding, I
hope you will use the information the organization has available if you
should ever need it.
Fondly, Judy
Myranda wrote:
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Myranda
that is such a shame, Myranda. You must have felt really crappy leaving
that Meeting.
I must add that I have been attending Meetings for 23 years ( yes,
years) and have not ever seen anything even remotely like that take place.
I have seen some women, who are so excited and passionate about their
babies, get more than a bit boisterous about the benefits of
breastfeeding. These are women who attend Meetings and a Leader never
knows what the make -up of a Meeting will be as they are open to the public.
It is the LLL Leaders' responsibility to lead the Meeting in such a way
that everyone's needs are met. Much easier said than done! but LLLI
Philosophy is certainly accepting of every woman's choices. Leaders
study a long time, attend sessions on communication skills, keep their
knowledge of research current, all on a volunteer basis, in order to
*prevent* what happened during the Meeting you attended.
Most of the women in the local Groups here are working Moms and some
have chosen to supplement with formula during their absences. I have
seen many single mothers whose babies spent time with their fathers away
from mom...women who nursed one twin and not the other.....
There are as many situations as there are babies; yet each Mother is
always treated with respect. *You* know what is best for your family and
you should not have been judged in any way.
I am so sorry that you had that experience....I can guarantee you would
not be treated that way at any Meeting near me. and it is likely that
you could have returned to that Group and met with an entirely different
gathering of Mothers and had the wonderful experience most people have
when they find LLL. I distinctly remember the first time I attended one-
I was pregnant with my 2nd, had weaned the first early ... no one said
a word about my past experiences but they did offer vast amounts of
information that made my breastfeeding relationship with the new baby
wonderful.
La Leche League is the 'World's Foremost Authority ' on breastfeeding, I
hope you will use the information the organization has available if you
should ever need it.
Fondly, Judy
Myranda wrote:
> Be careful what you say if you go to their meetings! I formula-fed[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> both my boys because I had to work full time. When I had my third
> baby, I had been staying home for over 4 years, so I wanted to
> breastfeed her. I went to a meeting.... they asked about how I'd fed
> the boys, and I told them. The rest of the meeting was spent with them
> attacking my choices and telling me what a bad mom I was. Absolutely
> no support for me wanting to breastfeed now, no help or advice,
> nothing. Just criticism for past choices. I was almost in tears by the
> time I left.
> Myranda
>
> From: Judy
> attending LL Meetings is a must do while pregnant
> and the LLLI website is VERY helpful:
>
> http://lalecheleague.org/
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
> ADVERTISEMENT
> <http://rd.yahoo.com/M=233351.2428261.3848243.2225242/D=egroupweb/S=1705081972:HM/A=1213956/R=0/*http://www.gotomypc.com/u/tr/yh/grp/300_Cquo1/g22lp?Target=mm/g22lp.tmpl>
>
>
>
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> email the moderator, Joyce Fetteroll (fetteroll@...), or the
> list owner, Helen Hegener (HEM-Editor@...).
>
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
marji
After reading this, Myranda, all I can say is GRRRRR! How awful! I'm SO
sorry!!
Your friend,
Marji
At 17:00 10/3/02 -0400, you wrote:
sorry!!
Your friend,
Marji
At 17:00 10/3/02 -0400, you wrote:
>Thanks Judy! One of the worst things was that it was the leader who[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>started the criticism. She asked why I had formula fed, then went on to
>tell me that I should have done my homework about it, because I could have
>and should have still nursed at night. Then I said they both slept through
>the night starting at two months, and everyone jumped in about how I must
>have let them cry til they just gave up and slept (not true) and about how
>I dehydrated them, and several other things I don't remember now. The
>leader just sat there quietly frowning at me after the others started in.
>Three of them were in agreement that I wouldn't have enough dedication to
>nurse my new baby, and insinuated that I was wasting their time by coming.
>I'm glad to hear not everyone's like they were!!!
>Myranda
> that is such a shame, Myranda. You must have felt really crappy leaving
> that Meeting.
>
> I must add that I have been attending Meetings for 23 years ( yes,
> years) and have not ever seen anything even remotely like that take place.
> I have seen some women, who are so excited and passionate about their
> babies, get more than a bit boisterous about the benefits of
> breastfeeding. These are women who attend Meetings and a Leader never
> knows what the make -up of a Meeting will be as they are open to the
> public.
> It is the LLL Leaders' responsibility to lead the Meeting in such a way
> that everyone's needs are met. Much easier said than done! but LLLI
> Philosophy is certainly accepting of every woman's choices. Leaders
> study a long time, attend sessions on communication skills, keep their
> knowledge of research current, all on a volunteer basis, in order to
> *prevent* what happened during the Meeting you attended.
> Most of the women in the local Groups here are working Moms and some
> have chosen to supplement with formula during their absences. I have
> seen many single mothers whose babies spent time with their fathers away
> from mom...women who nursed one twin and not the other.....
> There are as many situations as there are babies; yet each Mother is
> always treated with respect. *You* know what is best for your family and
> you should not have been judged in any way.
> I am so sorry that you had that experience....I can guarantee you would
> not be treated that way at any Meeting near me. and it is likely that
> you could have returned to that Group and met with an entirely different
> gathering of Mothers and had the wonderful experience most people have
> when they find LLL. I distinctly remember the first time I attended one-
> I was pregnant with my 2nd, had weaned the first early ... no one said
> a word about my past experiences but they did offer vast amounts of
> information that made my breastfeeding relationship with the new baby
> wonderful.
> La Leche League is the 'World's Foremost Authority ' on breastfeeding, I
> hope you will use the information the organization has available if you
> should ever need it.
> Fondly, Judy
>
> Myranda wrote:
>
> > Be careful what you say if you go to their meetings! I formula-fed
> > both my boys because I had to work full time. When I had my third
> > baby, I had been staying home for over 4 years, so I wanted to
> > breastfeed her. I went to a meeting.... they asked about how I'd fed
> > the boys, and I told them. The rest of the meeting was spent with them
> > attacking my choices and telling me what a bad mom I was. Absolutely
> > no support for me wanting to breastfeed now, no help or advice,
> > nothing. Just criticism for past choices. I was almost in tears by the
> > time I left.
> > Myranda
> >
> > From: Judy
> > attending LL Meetings is a must do while pregnant
> > and the LLLI website is VERY helpful:
> >
> > http://lalecheleague.org/
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> >
> >
> > Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
> > ADVERTISEMENT
> >
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>
> >
> >
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> > email the moderator, Joyce Fetteroll (fetteroll@...), or the
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>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
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> ADVERTISEMENT
>
>
>
>
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>
>
>[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
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Judy
my thoughts EXACTLY.
marji wrote:
marji wrote:
> After reading this, Myranda, all I can say is GRRRRR! How awful! I'm SO[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> sorry!!
>
> Your friend,
>
> Marji
>
> At 17:00 10/3/02 -0400, you wrote:
> >Thanks Judy! One of the worst things was that it was the leader who
> >started the criticism. She asked why I had formula fed, then went on to
> >tell me that I should have done my homework about it, because I could
> have
> >and should have still nursed at night. Then I said they both slept
> through
> >the night starting at two months, and everyone jumped in about how I
> must
> >have let them cry til they just gave up and slept (not true) and
> about how
> >I dehydrated them, and several other things I don't remember now. The
> >leader just sat there quietly frowning at me after the others started
> in.
> >Three of them were in agreement that I wouldn't have enough
> dedication to
> >nurse my new baby, and insinuated that I was wasting their time by
> coming.
> >I'm glad to hear not everyone's like they were!!!
> >Myranda
> > that is such a shame, Myranda. You must have felt really crappy
> leaving
> > that Meeting.
> >
> > I must add that I have been attending Meetings for 23 years ( yes,
> > years) and have not ever seen anything even remotely like that
> take place.
> > I have seen some women, who are so excited and passionate about their
> > babies, get more than a bit boisterous about the benefits of
> > breastfeeding. These are women who attend Meetings and a Leader never
> > knows what the make -up of a Meeting will be as they are open to the
> > public.
> > It is the LLL Leaders' responsibility to lead the Meeting in such
> a way
> > that everyone's needs are met. Much easier said than done! but LLLI
> > Philosophy is certainly accepting of every woman's choices. Leaders
> > study a long time, attend sessions on communication skills, keep their
> > knowledge of research current, all on a volunteer basis, in order to
> > *prevent* what happened during the Meeting you attended.
> > Most of the women in the local Groups here are working Moms and some
> > have chosen to supplement with formula during their absences. I have
> > seen many single mothers whose babies spent time with their
> fathers away
> > from mom...women who nursed one twin and not the other.....
> > There are as many situations as there are babies; yet each Mother is
> > always treated with respect. *You* know what is best for your
> family and
> > you should not have been judged in any way.
> > I am so sorry that you had that experience....I can guarantee you
> would
> > not be treated that way at any Meeting near me. and it is likely that
> > you could have returned to that Group and met with an entirely
> different
> > gathering of Mothers and had the wonderful experience most people have
> > when they find LLL. I distinctly remember the first time I
> attended one-
> > I was pregnant with my 2nd, had weaned the first early ... no one
> said
> > a word about my past experiences but they did offer vast amounts of
> > information that made my breastfeeding relationship with the new baby
> > wonderful.
> > La Leche League is the 'World's Foremost Authority ' on
> breastfeeding, I
> > hope you will use the information the organization has available
> if you
> > should ever need it.
> > Fondly, Judy
> >
> > Myranda wrote:
> >
> > > Be careful what you say if you go to their meetings! I formula-fed
> > > both my boys because I had to work full time. When I had my third
> > > baby, I had been staying home for over 4 years, so I wanted to
> > > breastfeed her. I went to a meeting.... they asked about how I'd fed
> > > the boys, and I told them. The rest of the meeting was spent
> with them
> > > attacking my choices and telling me what a bad mom I was. Absolutely
> > > no support for me wanting to breastfeed now, no help or advice,
> > > nothing. Just criticism for past choices. I was almost in tears
> by the
> > > time I left.
> > > Myranda
> > >
> > > From: Judy
> > > attending LL Meetings is a must do while pregnant
> > > and the LLLI website is VERY helpful:
> > >
> > > http://lalecheleague.org/
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> > >
> > >
> > > Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
> > > ADVERTISEMENT
> > >
> >
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>
> >
> > >
> > >
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> line! ~~~~
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> > > an email to:
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Bronwen
>> One of the worst things was that it was the leader who started thecriticism. She asked why I had formula fed, then went on to tell me that I
should have done my homework about it, because I could have and should have
still nursed at night.>>
Hi Myranda :-)
I though I would reply to this thread because I have been a practicing LLL
Leader since my first baby was one (she is now 14).
We are expressly trained to focus on the positives of breastfeeding, not the
negatives of bottlefeeding. If a woman starts ragging on bottle feeding or
bottle feeding mothers, it is the leaders obligation and responsibility to
say something like, "We are not here to critizise bottlefeeding but to
support and encourage those wishing to breastfeed." And steer the meeting in
another direction.
Sometimes moms come to meetings having bottlefed wanting to find out why
breastfeeding didn't work for them. Then we can brainstorm for the possible
reasons so she has that information for the future. This is sometimes
painful, especially when the mom didn't want to stop breastfeeding. As a
leader, it is important to be sensitive to the feelings of the mothers at
the meeting.
I am very sorry you had such a bad experience.
I can tell by your posts that you care deeply about your children and only
want what is best for them. This is what the leader would have recognized
in you and enunciated in the meeting, (if I could have a wish from a LLL
genie).
(Hey, while I am at it, "I wish that all of my meetings were and will be
perfect! and that all of the mothers leave feeling that they are the most
important beautiful person in the world to their baby!")
Love to you,
Bronwen
Myranda
Hi Bronwen,
These are some of the things I'd always heard about LLL, which is why I wanted to go in the first place. I guess I should have driven the extra 30 miles to the other town meeting!
Myranda
Hi Myranda :-)
I though I would reply to this thread because I have been a practicing LLL
Leader since my first baby was one (she is now 14).
We are expressly trained to focus on the positives of breastfeeding, not the
negatives of bottlefeeding. If a woman starts ragging on bottle feeding or
bottle feeding mothers, it is the leaders obligation and responsibility to
say something like, "We are not here to critizise bottlefeeding but to
support and encourage those wishing to breastfeed." And steer the meeting in
another direction.
Sometimes moms come to meetings having bottlefed wanting to find out why
breastfeeding didn't work for them. Then we can brainstorm for the possible
reasons so she has that information for the future. This is sometimes
painful, especially when the mom didn't want to stop breastfeeding. As a
leader, it is important to be sensitive to the feelings of the mothers at
the meeting.
I am very sorry you had such a bad experience.
I can tell by your posts that you care deeply about your children and only
want what is best for them. This is what the leader would have recognized
in you and enunciated in the meeting, (if I could have a wish from a LLL
genie).
(Hey, while I am at it, "I wish that all of my meetings were and will be
perfect! and that all of the mothers leave feeling that they are the most
important beautiful person in the world to their baby!")
Love to you,
Bronwen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
These are some of the things I'd always heard about LLL, which is why I wanted to go in the first place. I guess I should have driven the extra 30 miles to the other town meeting!
Myranda
Hi Myranda :-)
I though I would reply to this thread because I have been a practicing LLL
Leader since my first baby was one (she is now 14).
We are expressly trained to focus on the positives of breastfeeding, not the
negatives of bottlefeeding. If a woman starts ragging on bottle feeding or
bottle feeding mothers, it is the leaders obligation and responsibility to
say something like, "We are not here to critizise bottlefeeding but to
support and encourage those wishing to breastfeed." And steer the meeting in
another direction.
Sometimes moms come to meetings having bottlefed wanting to find out why
breastfeeding didn't work for them. Then we can brainstorm for the possible
reasons so she has that information for the future. This is sometimes
painful, especially when the mom didn't want to stop breastfeeding. As a
leader, it is important to be sensitive to the feelings of the mothers at
the meeting.
I am very sorry you had such a bad experience.
I can tell by your posts that you care deeply about your children and only
want what is best for them. This is what the leader would have recognized
in you and enunciated in the meeting, (if I could have a wish from a LLL
genie).
(Hey, while I am at it, "I wish that all of my meetings were and will be
perfect! and that all of the mothers leave feeling that they are the most
important beautiful person in the world to their baby!")
Love to you,
Bronwen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]