Virginia Chiasson

Hello all,

My name is Virginia. I am new to the list and have been reading digests for two days and really wanted to add my two cents to this particular topic.



Two years ago a teacher "diagnosed" my son as having ADHD. The doctors took this diagnosis as gospel and I was bullied at the hands of DSS into medicating him. It has not worked and my son's "misbehavior" has only escalated. That is why I am taking him out of public school system. This is such an overused label.



I have bipolar disorder. A real doctor diagnosed this problem after tests and many sessions of me explaining how "weird" I am, how many days on end I do not sleep and how much stuff I get done and exactly what I call risk taking behaviors. But this is something I rarely share this with others because the label "Bipolar" get so misused in the popular media that people have asked me some pretty strange questions. People think those with bipolar disorder are prone to be mass murderers, can't have kids, never marry and are completely deranged, only being marginally normal because of the miracle of the drug, Lithium.



The truth is that I allowed myself to be minimally medicated so that I would sleep occasionally and so that I can function as a quasi- normal parent. I have a child, have been married three times, have never killed any one and I only get mildly deranged while suffering once a month from PMS (According to my son that's Pre Monster Syndrome). I can laugh at the label I have. My son cannot laugh at his.



This label is all over his school paperwork. Teachers make assumptions right from the beginning when they see that label and it colors their interaction for the rest of the year. They say my son is disruptive. I have been in class and witnessed this. He is excited to be learning and not shy about speaking out. He is impatient to show you that he knows the answer and gets frustrated with classmates who lag behind. He is ready to move on.right now. It causes problems, to be sure. But he is not being the monster that they describe in notes home to me.



Then there is this whole hyperactivity thing. He can't sit still. yes. I agree. So let the kid move. To her credit, his first grade teacher would let him move to a carpet near the books when he got too fidgety in his desk. He still participated in class while he was reading something totally off topic from the carpeted area. He was bothering no one. He was not disruptive and he passed the first grade with flying colors. except for writing. The kid's penmanship is atrocious. So what? I can read it.barely<G>. Mine is lousy too. I am a writer with the penmanship of a doctor.



As adults, when someone hangs us with a label we can choose whether or not to accept it, embrace it or ignore it. But when a child gets hung with a label they do not get to choose. I am not blind. Something is wrong with my son. He has wild mood swings, erratic moods, violent outbursts and unexplained crying spells. at school. It is not as bad or as pronounced at home.



We have finally found a doctor who will really listen to what we are telling him about our son. And eventually we will get to the heart of the problem and heal it. But until then I wish we could just get educators to drop these labels. Just describe what it is the child is doing and get on with it. ADD and ADHD are more than just labels. They are evaluations of where are children belong in some arbitrary pecking order. They are value judgments delineating how perfect or imperfect our babies are.



You can teach Math or English from a book but not so with self esteem. Until the school system and our society as a whole sees ADD and ADHD as what they are, labels for behavior that they disapprove of and excuses to medicate free souls into submission, then I am quite happy with my decision to remove my child from their diploma factory.



Wow. I did not realize just how badly this subject really pushed my buttons. I had not originally planned to write all of that, but now that I have I hope you all will forgive me for jumping upon such a big soapbox<ggg>. Before I fall off this thing, someone else jump up here with me.



I am new to unschooling. In fact, I am still waiting for my paperwork to be approved. My son will still be in school until early October. I have been keeping him home a day or two a week and beginning the process of unschooling him, getting him used to the idea of it and the rhythm of it. Considering that he sees his psychologist once a week and he has missed school several times because the school will no longer let us send him to the bus stop until the bus gets here and he was left behind (He kept pretending to be a dog and tried to chase the bus, according to the bus driver.), they don't really question me too hard about his attendance.

I look forward to meeting you all and shooting off my mouth when you all indulge me<G> Take care.



Brightest Blessings,

Virginia








---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.386 / Virus Database: 218 - Release Date: 9/9/2002



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Valerie

--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., Virginia Chiasson
<silverhuntress@c...> wrote:
>
>
> Hello all,
>
> My name is Virginia. I am new to the list and have been
reading digests for two days and really wanted to add my two cents
to this particular topic.
>
>
Best wishes to you Virginia. I bet his problems disappear once he's
home where he's accepted as he is. :-)

love, Valerie

MO Milligans

At 03:22 PM 9/14/02 -0400, you wrote:

>I look forward to meeting you all and shooting off my mouth when you all
>indulge me<G> Take care.
>
> Brightest Blessings,
>
> Virginia
==
Welcome to the list :)

Todd

Our HOME page
http://rambleman.tripod.com/index.html

ebmsc

Dear Virginia,

I can somewhat relate to your description of your son. I've never
sent my daughter (who's almost 6) to school, and I self-diagnose her to
be ADHD based on the checklist that can be found on almost any ADD
website. In addition, she has developed TICS, so I'm self-diagnosing
her as having Tourettes. She also has explosive outburts and blame
everybody for her problems. I'm looking into coping techniques from
"The Explosive Child". I joined a Tourette's list, because her tics
were so severe at one time, we panicked. Sad to say, the majority of
the list members advocated medication --- this list is not a homeschool
list, so I don't think the members can relate to me very well.
That's why I'm looking for a more homeschool-friendly list for
children with "special needs or gifted" (however you want to call it)
that doesn't immediately jump to meds as a quick-fix to all their
problems.
I also finished reading the book "ADD - A different perception" by Thom
Hartmann, and it's a very empowering book. He criticises the public
school system for failing to deal with gifted children, whom the
teachers easily dismiss as "problem" children. Another book that I
found empowering is Thomas Armstrong's "In Their Own Way" and "The
Myth of ADD".

I personally don't believe in the school system anymore, and anything
that requires interaction with the school system, I avoid as much as
possible.

I hope you will find homeschooling a more satisfying and rewarding
experience for you and your son. This list keeps people "sane",
instead of other lists e.g. for special needs or whatever, which seems
to advocate that people with "disorders" are outcasts and needs meds
to function completely in society. This is a very sad picture.

Best Wishes,
Merilyn


--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., Virginia Chiasson
<silverhuntress@c...> wrote:
>
>
> Hello all,
>
> My name is Virginia. I am new to the list and have been reading
digests for two days and really wanted to add my two cents to this
particular topic.
>
>
>
> Two years ago a teacher "diagnosed" my son as having ADHD. The
doctors took this diagnosis as gospel and I was bullied at the hands
of DSS into medicating him. It has not worked and my son's
"misbehavior" has only escalated. That is why I am taking him out of
public school system. This is such an overused label.
>
>
>
> I have bipolar disorder. A real doctor diagnosed this problem after
tests and many sessions of me explaining how "weird" I am, how many
days on end I do not sleep and how much stuff I get done and exactly
what I call risk taking behaviors. But this is something I rarely
share this with others because the label "Bipolar" get so misused in
the popular media that people have asked me some pretty strange
questions. People think those with bipolar disorder are prone to be
mass murderers, can't have kids, never marry and are completely
deranged, only being marginally normal because of the miracle of the
drug, Lithium.
>
>
>
> The truth is that I allowed myself to be minimally medicated so that
I would sleep occasionally and so that I can function as a quasi-
normal parent. I have a child, have been married three times, have
never killed any one and I only get mildly deranged while suffering
once a month from PMS (According to my son that's Pre Monster
Syndrome). I can laugh at the label I have. My son cannot laugh at his.
>
>
>
> This label is all over his school paperwork. Teachers make
assumptions right from the beginning when they see that label and it
colors their interaction for the rest of the year. They say my son is
disruptive. I have been in class and witnessed this. He is excited to
be learning and not shy about speaking out. He is impatient to show
you that he knows the answer and gets frustrated with classmates who
lag behind. He is ready to move on.right now. It causes problems, to
be sure. But he is not being the monster that they describe in notes
home to me.
>
>
>
> Then there is this whole hyperactivity thing. He can't sit still.
yes. I agree. So let the kid move. To her credit, his first grade
teacher would let him move to a carpet near the books when he got too
fidgety in his desk. He still participated in class while he was
reading something totally off topic from the carpeted area. He was
bothering no one. He was not disruptive and he passed the first grade
with flying colors. except for writing. The kid's penmanship is
atrocious. So what? I can read it.barely<G>. Mine is lousy too. I am a
writer with the penmanship of a doctor.
>
>
>
> As adults, when someone hangs us with a label we can choose whether
or not to accept it, embrace it or ignore it. But when a child gets
hung with a label they do not get to choose. I am not blind. Something
is wrong with my son. He has wild mood swings, erratic moods, violent
outbursts and unexplained crying spells. at school. It is not as bad
or as pronounced at home.
>
>
>
> We have finally found a doctor who will really listen to what we are
telling him about our son. And eventually we will get to the heart of
the problem and heal it. But until then I wish we could just get
educators to drop these labels. Just describe what it is the child is
doing and get on with it. ADD and ADHD are more than just labels. They
are evaluations of where are children belong in some arbitrary pecking
order. They are value judgments delineating how perfect or imperfect
our babies are.
>
>
>
> You can teach Math or English from a book but not so with self
esteem. Until the school system and our society as a whole sees ADD
and ADHD as what they are, labels for behavior that they disapprove of
and excuses to medicate free souls into submission, then I am quite
happy with my decision to remove my child from their diploma factory.
>
>
>
> Wow. I did not realize just how badly this subject really pushed my
buttons. I had not originally planned to write all of that, but now
that I have I hope you all will forgive me for jumping upon such a big
soapbox<ggg>. Before I fall off this thing, someone else jump up here
with me.
>
>
>
> I am new to unschooling. In fact, I am still waiting for my
paperwork to be approved. My son will still be in school until early
October. I have been keeping him home a day or two a week and
beginning the process of unschooling him, getting him used to the idea
of it and the rhythm of it. Considering that he sees his psychologist
once a week and he has missed school several times because the school
will no longer let us send him to the bus stop until the bus gets here
and he was left behind (He kept pretending to be a dog and tried to
chase the bus, according to the bus driver.), they don't really
question me too hard about his attendance.
>
> I look forward to meeting you all and shooting off my mouth when you
all indulge me<G> Take care.
>
>
>
> Brightest Blessings,
>
> Virginia
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ---
> Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
> Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
> Version: 6.0.386 / Virus Database: 218 - Release Date: 9/9/2002
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

beneficialbug

--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "ebmsc" <ebmsc@y...> wrote:
> Dear Virginia,
>
> I can somewhat relate to your description of your son. I've never
> sent my daughter (who's almost 6) to school, and I self-diagnose
her to
> be ADHD based on the checklist that can be found on almost any ADD
> website. In addition, she has developed TICS, so I'm self-
diagnosing
> her as having Tourettes. She also has explosive outburts and blame
> everybody for her problems. I'm looking into coping techniques from
> "The Explosive Child". I joined a Tourette's list, because her tics
> were so severe at one time, we panicked. Sad to say, the majority
of
> the list members advocated medication --- this list is not a
homeschool
> list, so I don't think the members can relate to me very well.
> That's why I'm looking for a more homeschool-friendly list for
> children with "special needs or gifted" (however you want to call
it)
> that doesn't immediately jump to meds as a quick-fix to all their
> problems.
> I also finished reading the book "ADD - A different perception" by
Thom
> Hartmann, and it's a very empowering book. He criticises the public
> school system for failing to deal with gifted children, whom the
> teachers easily dismiss as "problem" children. Another book that I
> found empowering is Thomas Armstrong's "In Their Own Way" and "The
> Myth of ADD".
>
> I personally don't believe in the school system anymore, and
anything
> that requires interaction with the school system, I avoid as much as
> possible.
>
> I hope you will find homeschooling a more satisfying and rewarding
> experience for you and your son. This list keeps people "sane",
> instead of other lists e.g. for special needs or whatever, which
seems
> to advocate that people with "disorders" are outcasts and needs meds
> to function completely in society. This is a very sad picture.
>
> Best Wishes,
> Merilyn
>
>
> --- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., Virginia Chiasson
> <silverhuntress@c...> wrote:
> >
> >
> > Hello all,
> >
> > My name is Virginia. I am new to the list and have been
reading
> digests for two days and really wanted to add my two cents to this
> particular topic.
> >
> >
> >
> > Two years ago a teacher "diagnosed" my son as having ADHD. The
> doctors took this diagnosis as gospel and I was bullied at the hands
> of DSS into medicating him. It has not worked and my son's
> "misbehavior" has only escalated. That is why I am taking him out of
> public school system. This is such an overused label.
> >
> >
> >
> > I have bipolar disorder. A real doctor diagnosed this problem
after
> tests and many sessions of me explaining how "weird" I am, how many
> days on end I do not sleep and how much stuff I get done and exactly
> what I call risk taking behaviors. But this is something I rarely
> share this with others because the label "Bipolar" get so misused in
> the popular media that people have asked me some pretty strange
> questions. People think those with bipolar disorder are prone to be
> mass murderers, can't have kids, never marry and are completely
> deranged, only being marginally normal because of the miracle of the
> drug, Lithium.
> >
> >
> >
> > The truth is that I allowed myself to be minimally medicated so
that
> I would sleep occasionally and so that I can function as a quasi-
> normal parent. I have a child, have been married three times, have
> never killed any one and I only get mildly deranged while suffering
> once a month from PMS (According to my son that's Pre Monster
> Syndrome). I can laugh at the label I have. My son cannot laugh at
his.
> >
> >
> >
> > This label is all over his school paperwork. Teachers make
> assumptions right from the beginning when they see that label and it
> colors their interaction for the rest of the year. They say my son
is
> disruptive. I have been in class and witnessed this. He is excited
to
> be learning and not shy about speaking out. He is impatient to show
> you that he knows the answer and gets frustrated with classmates who
> lag behind. He is ready to move on.right now. It causes problems, to
> be sure. But he is not being the monster that they describe in notes
> home to me.
> >
> >
> >
> > Then there is this whole hyperactivity thing. He can't sit still.
> yes. I agree. So let the kid move. To her credit, his first grade
> teacher would let him move to a carpet near the books when he got
too
> fidgety in his desk. He still participated in class while he was
> reading something totally off topic from the carpeted area. He was
> bothering no one. He was not disruptive and he passed the first
grade
> with flying colors. except for writing. The kid's penmanship is
> atrocious. So what? I can read it.barely<G>. Mine is lousy too. I
am a
> writer with the penmanship of a doctor.
> >
> >
> >
> > As adults, when someone hangs us with a label we can choose
whether
> or not to accept it, embrace it or ignore it. But when a child gets
> hung with a label they do not get to choose. I am not blind.
Something
> is wrong with my son. He has wild mood swings, erratic moods,
violent
> outbursts and unexplained crying spells. at school. It is not as bad
> or as pronounced at home.
> >
> >
> >
> > We have finally found a doctor who will really listen to what we
are
> telling him about our son. And eventually we will get to the heart
of
> the problem and heal it. But until then I wish we could just get
> educators to drop these labels. Just describe what it is the child
is
> doing and get on with it. ADD and ADHD are more than just labels.
They
> are evaluations of where are children belong in some arbitrary
pecking
> order. They are value judgments delineating how perfect or imperfect
> our babies are.
> >
> >
> >
> > You can teach Math or English from a book but not so with self
> esteem. Until the school system and our society as a whole sees ADD
> and ADHD as what they are, labels for behavior that they disapprove
of
> and excuses to medicate free souls into submission, then I am
quite
> happy with my decision to remove my child from their diploma
factory.
> >
> >
> >
> > Wow. I did not realize just how badly this subject really pushed
my
> buttons. I had not originally planned to write all of that, but now
> that I have I hope you all will forgive me for jumping upon such a
big
> soapbox<ggg>. Before I fall off this thing, someone else jump up
here
> with me.
> >
> >
> >
> > I am new to unschooling. In fact, I am still waiting for my
> paperwork to be approved. My son will still be in school until early
> October. I have been keeping him home a day or two a week and
> beginning the process of unschooling him, getting him used to the
idea
> of it and the rhythm of it. Considering that he sees his
psychologist
> once a week and he has missed school several times because the
school
> will no longer let us send him to the bus stop until the bus gets
here
> and he was left behind (He kept pretending to be a dog and tried to
> chase the bus, according to the bus driver.), they don't really
> question me too hard about his attendance.
> >
> > I look forward to meeting you all and shooting off my mouth when
you
> all indulge me<G> Take care.
> >
> >
> >
> > Brightest Blessings,
> >
> > Virginia
> >
> >
> >
> > Hi Virginia,
This is my first time checking out unschooling.com and my
first attempt to send a message... hope it gets through.

Just wanted to let you know, in case you are not aware, people
with bipolar disorder frequently are first diagnosed as ADD or ADHD,
especially kids, are put on meds, and often those meds create more
problems for them, according to a Dr. interviewed about bipolar
disorder just yesterday on KPFA, a Pacifica station (Berkeley, CA).
Unfortunately, I do not remember the Dr.'s name, nor do I remember
the name of the program, but it is one hosted by an arrogant Dr. The
Dr. he was interviewing was a bipolar specialist. KPFA's office # is
510-848-6767 1929 Martin Luther King, Jr. Ave., Berkeley, CA

Max Ventura
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > ---
> > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
> > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
> > Version: 6.0.386 / Virus Database: 218 - Release Date: 9/9/2002
> >
> >
> >
> > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

N.McV.

Many homeschooling parents choose to use medication as part of therapy for disorders such as ADD and Tourettes. Many parents (and more all the tie) who send children to schools are choosing to forego the use of medication if they feel it's not warranted to not helpful.

Some of us adults who are homeschooling our children have chosen to use medication in remediating our own neurological stumbling blocks. (And precious few of us were diagnosed when we were in school.)

It really isn't a cut-and-dried homeschooling issue. There are about a kazillion email lists out there now, and it may take a while before you find the list where you feel comfortable.

Nancy McVicker

>ebmsc wrote:>I've never
>sent my daughter (who's almost 6) to school, and I >self-diagnose her to
>be ADHD based on the checklist that can be found on >almost any ADD
>website. In addition, she has developed TICS, so I'm >self-diagnosing
>her as having Tourettes. She also has explosive >outburts and blame
>everybody for her problems. I'm looking into coping >techniques from
>"The Explosive Child". I joined a Tourette's list, >because her tics
>were so severe at one time, we panicked. Sad to say, >the majority of
>the list members advocated medication --- this list >is not a homeschool
>list, so I don't think the members can relate to me >very well.



---------------------------------
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Yahoo! News - Today's headlines

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

ebmsc

Why would an unschooler choose the path of medicating their children?
There's no need for ritalin, since the child doesn't need to be
confined in a classroom and forced to sit and behave. There's no
need for medication for Tourettes, since there is no classroom to be
complaining about the child's tics. Please tell me, why do you
choose to medicate?

It is very rare to hear that parents of schooled children take the
stand of not-medicating their children, because they are usually
pressured to do so by the school system.

Ideally, if there's such a list out there, I'd like to join which
advocates for attachment parenting, unschooling, healthy living,
homesteading, with gifted special needs children.


Merilyn

--- In Unschooling-dotcom@y..., "N.McV." <nmcvick@y...> wrote:
>
> Many homeschooling parents choose to use medication as part of
therapy for disorders such as ADD and Tourettes. Many parents (and
more all the tie) who send children to schools are choosing to forego
the use of medication if they feel it's not warranted to not helpful.
>
> Some of us adults who are homeschooling our children have chosen to
use medication in remediating our own neurological stumbling blocks.
(And precious few of us were diagnosed when we were in school.)
>
> It really isn't a cut-and-dried homeschooling issue. There are
about a kazillion email lists out there now, and it may take a while
before you find the list where you feel comfortable.
>
> Nancy McVicker
>
> >ebmsc wrote:>I've never
> >sent my daughter (who's almost 6) to school, and I >self-diagnose
her to
> >be ADHD based on the checklist that can be found on >almost any ADD
> >website. In addition, she has developed TICS, so I'm >self-
diagnosing
> >her as having Tourettes. She also has explosive >outburts and
blame
> >everybody for her problems. I'm looking into coping >techniques
from
> >"The Explosive Child". I joined a Tourette's list, >because her
tics
> >were so severe at one time, we panicked. Sad to say, >the
majority of
> >the list members advocated medication --- this list >is not a
homeschool
> >list, so I don't think the members can relate to me >very well.
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Do you Yahoo!?
> Yahoo! News - Today's headlines
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

N.McV.

>ebmsc wrote:
>Why would an unschooler choose the path of >medicating their children?
>There's no need for ritalin, since the child doesn't >need to be
>confined in a classroom and forced to sit and >behave. There's no
>need for medication for Tourettes, since there is no >classroom to be
>complaining about the child's tics. Please tell me, >why do you
>choose to medicate?


The notion that "medication=good classroom behavior" comes from the schools. It's always a disappointment to hear homeschoolers repeat that notion.



I take medication as part of my remediation of my own ADD. I'm not in school. I don't have to sit still for 6 hours a day. I was in my 30's before I discovered that I had ADD, so my use of medication isn't a residual "schoolish" habit, either.



I take medication so that I can concentrate well enough to do things that other people take for granted. The greatest enhancement that medication brought to my life was my new ability to drive a car. I couldn't do that until I had the assistance of the meds.



(Since I live in a rural area, that's a major widening of my life. No more carrying gallons of milk home in my backpack, buying only what other groceries I could balance in bags on my bicycle handles. Now I can take the kids places too far away to walk. Now I can go to the library even in a rainstorm.)



One of the first things that ADD adults talk about, when they start meds, is how they can complete tasks -- again, something that most people take for granted. We joke about flitting from task to task and ending the day exhausted, yet without having accomplished one single thing. We joke about how we've never seen an entire movie in one sitting, even if we did actually sit in front of the screen without moving away. We joke about how we bring books or knitting into the kitchen while we cook, because if our wandering attention leads us out of the kitchen, it's the smoke alarm that reminds us that we were supposed to be cooking.



We joke, but ADD often plays havoc with relationships, strains family life, increases stress and aggravates stress-induced illnesses, and closes many of life's options.





Knowing that, should we say to a child, "Schools over-medicate, so you don't get a chance to try meds."?



The choice to use or not use meds isn't permanent, either. My son (HFA/Asperger Syndrome with low-level TS) doesn't currently use meds. But during early adolescence, he used Catapres to help with his poor impulse control. His frustration-induced outbursts frightened him and us, as well as blocking particpation in activities from playing Hide-&-Seek to picking out books at the library.

(Can you imagine the terror of a parent whose highly-impulsive kids threatens to someday throw himself in front of a truck? Been there, done that. You don't get a t-shirt, you get dark circles under your eyes.)



I hope parents who opt out of meds don't implant medication-phobia in their kids. Someday those kids may need meds to bypass handicaps from their lives, and may feel like "failures" for "having to resort to" using meds. Meds are an option. The choise to not use them should be an action, not a reaction to bad behavior by schools.



Bright Blessings.

Nancy McVicker



---------------------------------
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Yahoo! News - Today's headlines

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Tia Leschke

>We joke about how we bring books or knitting into the kitchen while we
>cook, because if our wandering attention leads us out of the kitchen, it's
>the smoke alarm that reminds us that we were supposed to be cooking.

I wish that worked for me. I can be standing right next to the stove,
engrossed in a book, and not notice the burning food in front of me until I
smell it.
<G>
Tia, who isn't ADD but suffers from fibro-fog, part of fibromyalgia.


No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
*********************************************
Tia Leschke
leschke@...
On Vancouver Island

Kelli Traaseth

Nancy, I have to agree with you on the medication thing. My own family struggles with different sicknesses that have been difficult to handle without meds. ADD, my brother; MS/depression, my sister; depression, my other brother; and fibromyalgia/depression, me.
I probably could get by without meds if I only had to take care of myself, but when we threw in 3 children..my health was what went.
I used to think if I really tried I could do it without meds, but you know what? I couldn't. And without it, my children and family suffered.
So I also think there is a tendency to over medicate but there is a place for meds sometimes too. We can easily generalize and say the natural way is best, but if the quality of a persons life is being compromised, such as a child feeling unloved, as what happened to me growing up.....I say bring on the medication!! I am such a better, laid back person, my kids enjoy me and I enjoy them. When I can get more sleep, get more exercise and just plain take care of myself more,,, then I might beable to go off, but for now, this is what's best for me.
I suppose this has been said before to those of you who have been on the list for a long time but I felt like I needed to say it. Thanks for listening.
Blah, Blah, Blah, I'll stop rambling/ranting/standing on my soap box now!
Kelli T.
"N.McV." wrote:

>ebmsc wrote:
>Why would an unschooler choose the path of >medicating their children?
>There's no need for ritalin, since the child doesn't >need to be
>confined in a classroom and forced to sit and >behave. There's no
>need for medication for Tourettes, since there is no >classroom to be
>complaining about the child's tics. Please tell me, >why do you
>choose to medicate?


The notion that "medication=good classroom behavior" comes from the schools. It's always a disappointment to hear homeschoolers repeat that notion.



I take medication as part of my remediation of my own ADD. I'm not in school. I don't have to sit still for 6 hours a day. I was in my 30's before I discovered that I had ADD, so my use of medication isn't a residual "schoolish" habit, either.



I take medication so that I can concentrate well enough to do things that other people take for granted. The greatest enhancement that medication brought to my life was my new ability to drive a car. I couldn't do that until I had the assistance of the meds.



(Since I live in a rural area, that's a major widening of my life. No more carrying gallons of milk home in my backpack, buying only what other groceries I could balance in bags on my bicycle handles. Now I can take the kids places too far away to walk. Now I can go to the library even in a rainstorm.)



One of the first things that ADD adults talk about, when they start meds, is how they can complete tasks -- again, something that most people take for granted. We joke about flitting from task to task and ending the day exhausted, yet without having accomplished one single thing. We joke about how we've never seen an entire movie in one sitting, even if we did actually sit in front of the screen without moving away. We joke about how we bring books or knitting into the kitchen while we cook, because if our wandering attention leads us out of the kitchen, it's the smoke alarm that reminds us that we were supposed to be cooking.



We joke, but ADD often plays havoc with relationships, strains family life, increases stress and aggravates stress-induced illnesses, and closes many of life's options.





Knowing that, should we say to a child, "Schools over-medicate, so you don't get a chance to try meds."?



The choice to use or not use meds isn't permanent, either. My son (HFA/Asperger Syndrome with low-level TS) doesn't currently use meds. But during early adolescence, he used Catapres to help with his poor impulse control. His frustration-induced outbursts frightened him and us, as well as blocking particpation in activities from playing Hide-&-Seek to picking out books at the library.

(Can you imagine the terror of a parent whose highly-impulsive kids threatens to someday throw himself in front of a truck? Been there, done that. You don't get a t-shirt, you get dark circles under your eyes.)



I hope parents who opt out of meds don't implant medication-phobia in their kids. Someday those kids may need meds to bypass handicaps from their lives, and may feel like "failures" for "having to resort to" using meds. Meds are an option. The choise to not use them should be an action, not a reaction to bad behavior by schools.



Bright Blessings.

Nancy McVicker



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Brenda Rose

I have been lurking for a while now since school started back for me in
January. My boys think it's funny that Mom has to go to school and do a lot
of "schoolwork." They're glad they don't have to do that!

I frequently see posts from people who are in Virginia. I am in Staunton.
I would love to get together with other unschoolers in this area/state. Are
there any organized meetings, or do people just get together as families?

At UVa I am working on a PhD in Education (social foundations) and am trying
to focus my research on homeschooling/unschooling. Would any of you in VA
(or close by) be willing to let me come "observe" your family? I want to
help people see that not only is homeschooling a good way to raise/teach
kids, but that unschooling is also a good approach to life. By describing
what families do and believe, I hope to help others see the validity and
benefits of this philosophy. I definitely do not come to the research as an
"unbiased" researcher. Please contact me at blr6a@....

Many thanks,

Brenda Rose

Flicker-N-Suds

Hi Brenda I am in Waynesboro. I have a list JUST for this area:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/VaUnschoolersSupport/

I don't really know how observing us would help though as my kids are just kids every day. If we had someone watching they most likely would not carry on as normal. But I would love to get together. We are also new homeschoolers and even newer unschoolers (started in Oct)

Sherry
Unschooling Soap Diva WAHM to 4 :o)
www.flicker-n-suds.com
Welcome to the world of Sinful Suds, Luscious Lotions, Funky Fibers and MORE!
"Education is not the filling of a bucket, but the lighting of a fire."
Wm. Butler Yeats





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Shyrley

Brenda Rose wrote:

> I have been lurking for a while now since school started back for me in
> January. My boys think it's funny that Mom has to go to school and do a lot
> of "schoolwork." They're glad they don't have to do that!
>
> I frequently see posts from people who are in Virginia. I am in Staunton.
> I would love to get together with other unschoolers in this area/state. Are
> there any organized meetings, or do people just get together as families?
>

I hold an Ungroup meeting (nominally once a month but I forgot in Feb).
Anyone interested in cming to Sterling, NVA say, the week of March 10th?
Al Unschoolers welcome, from wherever.

Shyrley