[email protected]

In a message dated 11/3/99 8:10:47 AM Pacific Standard Time,
tn-k4of5@... writes:

> Incidentally, I have always had an image of myself as a quitter, not least
> because me parents were always telling me what a failure I was. They often
> tried to force me to do things, either initiating activities or trying to
> force me to finish.

I have this image of myself too. I would ask to be in girl scouts and found
out shortly after joining that this was not me at all (I was a tomboy) and
wanted out. Well, the made me go for awhile and I was finally able to quit.
I wanted a horse so they got me a horse and had me do 4-H. I stuck with
4-h because that was the only way I knew to do my favorite part, pole bending
and barrels. It amazes me sometimes that they didn't put me where I most
belonged like rodeo. Of course I eventually quit because I grew bored and
the horse was basically a runaway and gave me fits. Again I was the quiter,
capricious, never finished anything. Then I decided on the swim team. No
way, uh-uh, I would only quit again so they were going to waste their time
taking me. So I gave up on it until I got my drivers license and then
joined. I stuck with it until I was too old at 18 yrs. They never knew I'd
like it so much... blah blah blah. I always said that I would pay attention
to the wants of my kids.
So here I am with 3 kids of my own (only one of them is homeschooling right
now). My kids dabble in this and that. Recently it was flag football for
the one I am homeschooling. It turns out he hates it. He was in tears half
the practices and every game. His dad, my ex, made light of it and saying
basically he should tough it out. Other people were telling me he should at
least finish out the season. I was torn for a bit but I stopped worrying
about making the practices on time or taking him home early. Then I just
asked him one day, do you want to quit? He said yes so we haven't gone back.
It was torture for him and I hated to see him hurt (emotionally, there were
some mean kids on that team and an oblivious coach). My youngest at 6 tried
flag football two practices and got out. He knew it was not for him. My
older son only wanted to stick it out I think because it was his dad's
favorite playing sport.
Kids have feelings too. I guess because as an adult I've followed my heart
and I want that for my kids as they grow up. I still try a little of
everything. I get into things enough to learn the basics and I move on. I'm
happy this way. Maybe my kids will be happy that way too.
Chelle the desert dweller