chores?
audrey elwood
do you guys give your kids any regular work within your families? i'm always
running into stuff about chores for kids. my mom didn't make us do any, she
said i'd be making beds for the rest of my life...go play! yeah, she was
awesome...now one of my best friends. and guess what. i remember asking her
to give me chores at one point cuz all of my friends had them! and here i
am worrying if i'm doing the right thing being "so relaxed". another
interesting thing... i enjoy cleaning and organizing...one of my favorite
pastimes.
audrey
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running into stuff about chores for kids. my mom didn't make us do any, she
said i'd be making beds for the rest of my life...go play! yeah, she was
awesome...now one of my best friends. and guess what. i remember asking her
to give me chores at one point cuz all of my friends had them! and here i
am worrying if i'm doing the right thing being "so relaxed". another
interesting thing... i enjoy cleaning and organizing...one of my favorite
pastimes.
audrey
_________________________________________________________________
Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com
[email protected]
In a message dated 8/5/02 9:56:48 AM, audreyelwood@... writes:
<< do you guys give your kids any regular work within your families? >>
Regular meaning ordinary, sometimes.
Regular meaning scheduled, no.
There are expectations of a level of cooperation, sort of the same as I
expect them to do as guests in other houses--pick up their own dishes, not
leave stuff where others need to walk, if they're going to the garage for a
soda ask if anyone else wants one. Put dirty laundry where it goes, hang wet
towels up, wipe off the sink. Courtesy.
Last night I asked Marty to come and help me sort some laundry and put his
own stuff away. We had an interesting discussion about whether it would be
advantageous for him to do his own laundry and that he did know how. I said
"his own laundry" would need to include towels, dish towels, other public
stuff. And efficiency works better by sorting similar things than doing lots
of little loads. I told him I'd rather have the general help.
Sometimes they take trash or recycling out without being asked, but they
never whine if they are asked.
The deal on their rooms is they can leave it pretty ratty as long as they're
willing to straighten it if I ask them to (when they're going to have
company, or when we've reached a point of frustration because something can't
be found or not enough of their clothes are making it into the laundry, or
because I'm grumpy and just want to have more order where I'm walking).
Sandra
<< do you guys give your kids any regular work within your families? >>
Regular meaning ordinary, sometimes.
Regular meaning scheduled, no.
There are expectations of a level of cooperation, sort of the same as I
expect them to do as guests in other houses--pick up their own dishes, not
leave stuff where others need to walk, if they're going to the garage for a
soda ask if anyone else wants one. Put dirty laundry where it goes, hang wet
towels up, wipe off the sink. Courtesy.
Last night I asked Marty to come and help me sort some laundry and put his
own stuff away. We had an interesting discussion about whether it would be
advantageous for him to do his own laundry and that he did know how. I said
"his own laundry" would need to include towels, dish towels, other public
stuff. And efficiency works better by sorting similar things than doing lots
of little loads. I told him I'd rather have the general help.
Sometimes they take trash or recycling out without being asked, but they
never whine if they are asked.
The deal on their rooms is they can leave it pretty ratty as long as they're
willing to straighten it if I ask them to (when they're going to have
company, or when we've reached a point of frustration because something can't
be found or not enough of their clothes are making it into the laundry, or
because I'm grumpy and just want to have more order where I'm walking).
Sandra
Alan & Brenda Leonard
on 8/5/02 18:27, [email protected] at
[email protected] wrote:
Sandra had good ideas, and that's about how it works here. I tend to
regularly ask my son to do certain things, and if he notices that they need
doing, he may do it himself. He also does a lot of the odd little things
that come up, mainly because those aren't particularly hard, and he often is
the one who has a few spare minutes to do something between other
activities. It's always been expected he'd help out around the house, and
has never been a problem, really. The occasional whine, perhaps, but
nothing big. I don't tie housework to allowance, partly because I don't
think my son is old enough to remember failing to do something on Monday and
being penalized for it on Saturday night, and partly because it's just too
much trouble to keep track.
But mine is an only, so there's no one to bicker with about the work, and
he's just 6, so he still LIKES helping! Maybe it's different with more or
older children.
brenda
who's off to bed, tired from having way too much fun today!
[email protected] wrote:
> do you guys give your kids any regular work within your families? i'm alwaysAudrey,
> running into stuff about chores for kids.
Sandra had good ideas, and that's about how it works here. I tend to
regularly ask my son to do certain things, and if he notices that they need
doing, he may do it himself. He also does a lot of the odd little things
that come up, mainly because those aren't particularly hard, and he often is
the one who has a few spare minutes to do something between other
activities. It's always been expected he'd help out around the house, and
has never been a problem, really. The occasional whine, perhaps, but
nothing big. I don't tie housework to allowance, partly because I don't
think my son is old enough to remember failing to do something on Monday and
being penalized for it on Saturday night, and partly because it's just too
much trouble to keep track.
But mine is an only, so there's no one to bicker with about the work, and
he's just 6, so he still LIKES helping! Maybe it's different with more or
older children.
brenda
who's off to bed, tired from having way too much fun today!
[email protected]
In a message dated 8/5/2002 8:56:49 AM Pacific Daylight Time,
audreyelwood@... writes:
"Rosie - will you help clear off the table?" etc. They usually do it - but
not always right away. Sometimes they say, "Mom - can I do something else
later, I'm busy right now?" I say yes to that, usually. I don't nag - I might
remind them though, if I think they've forgotten I even asked - but if they
don't do it within a reasonable time period, I just do it. Sometimes, to be
totally honest, I'm just snotty enough to point out to them that I am doing
it, though <G>.
-pamS
National Home Education Network
http://www.NHEN.org
Changing the Way the World Sees Homeschooling!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
audreyelwood@... writes:
> do you guys give your kids any regular work within your families? i'm alwaysI just ask people to do things. "Rox - would you unload the dishwasher."
>
> running into stuff about chores for kids. my mom didn't make us do any, she
>
> said i'd be making beds for the rest of my life...go play! yeah, she was
> awesome...now one of my best friends. and guess what. i remember asking her
>
> to give me chores at one point cuz all of my friends had them! and here i
> am worrying if i'm doing the right thing being "so relaxed". another
> interesting thing... i enjoy cleaning and organizing...one of my favorite
> pastimes.
"Rosie - will you help clear off the table?" etc. They usually do it - but
not always right away. Sometimes they say, "Mom - can I do something else
later, I'm busy right now?" I say yes to that, usually. I don't nag - I might
remind them though, if I think they've forgotten I even asked - but if they
don't do it within a reasonable time period, I just do it. Sometimes, to be
totally honest, I'm just snotty enough to point out to them that I am doing
it, though <G>.
-pamS
National Home Education Network
http://www.NHEN.org
Changing the Way the World Sees Homeschooling!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 8/5/2002 3:54:24 PM Pacific Daylight Time,
abtleo@... writes:
needs to be unloaded."
Sometimes that results in somebody ELSE doing it. <G>
It happened just the other night - and what's MORE!!!! - the kids even
divided it up and worked together cooperatively <G>.
--pamS
National Home Education Network
http://www.NHEN.org
Changing the Way the World Sees Homeschooling!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
abtleo@... writes:
> Sandra had good ideas, and that's about how it works here. I tend toOh - that reminded me. Another thing I do is just announce, "The dishwasher
> regularly ask my son to do certain things, and if he notices that they need
> doing, he may do it himself.
needs to be unloaded."
Sometimes that results in somebody ELSE doing it. <G>
It happened just the other night - and what's MORE!!!! - the kids even
divided it up and worked together cooperatively <G>.
--pamS
National Home Education Network
http://www.NHEN.org
Changing the Way the World Sees Homeschooling!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
KT
>Hey, that's a big breakthrough, because they apparently have realized
>
>Sometimes they say, "Mom - can I do **something else**
>later, I'm busy right now?" I say yes to that, usually.
>
that you wouldn't ask it if you didn't need/want it done NOW.
My 3 boys do not not not get that. Even if I explain it, they're not
invested in my logical order of things, most of the time.
If one of mine said that it would be such a shock to me, but it would be
such an improvement! <g>
Tuck
Fetteroll
on 8/6/02 12:05 AM, PSoroosh@... at PSoroosh@... wrote:
attitude behind the requests. It's more like asking a spouse to do
something. It's a real request -- not a command phrased as a request -- and
the kid *can* say no. It's a "Can you help out?" rather than "That's your
job so do it" type of thing.
Age is also a big factor. Up until last year (when she was 10) most requests
were greeted with loud groans. Now Kathryn helps bring in and put away the
groceries. It's *not* because I've finally gotten her trained properly. ;-)
It's just because she's older and sees things differently than she did
before.
(Thank yous for any help they give also go a lot further than grousing about
how little they did! ;-)
Joyce
> Oh - that reminded me. Another thing I do is just announce, "The dishwasherI think part that might not be coming through in these stories is the
> needs to be unloaded."
>
> Sometimes that results in somebody ELSE doing it. <G>
attitude behind the requests. It's more like asking a spouse to do
something. It's a real request -- not a command phrased as a request -- and
the kid *can* say no. It's a "Can you help out?" rather than "That's your
job so do it" type of thing.
Age is also a big factor. Up until last year (when she was 10) most requests
were greeted with loud groans. Now Kathryn helps bring in and put away the
groceries. It's *not* because I've finally gotten her trained properly. ;-)
It's just because she's older and sees things differently than she did
before.
(Thank yous for any help they give also go a lot further than grousing about
how little they did! ;-)
Joyce