Alan & Brenda Leonard

> I told my hubby that if our kids aren't invited to eat
> with everyone, then I will also leave and stay with the kids, maybe
> go out with them to grab a bite to eat or something. If there is an
> issue with them not wanting young children making noise, then for
> goodness sake, have an adult party withought the "parade."
>
> Grandpa did offer to pay for our room when we told him we could not
> afford one. Am I being a real pain in the butt?

Laura,

I don't have any idea how old your kids are, but your suggestion of leaving
when they are asked to leave seems fairly reasonable to me. Would it be
possible to compromise a bit more -- perhaps feeding the kids before the
parade, so that you could spend an hour or so with them, and then go back
down to the party, assuming they are old enough to be left in the room alone
to sleep? Most adult parties tend to go long enough that you wouldn't miss
it all if you left and came back.

Obviously, if your children are too little to be left alone, someone is
going to have to stay with them, and you would be the natural choice rather
than your husband, since it's his father's party. (Or maybe spending a
night on a sofa bed at a fancy hotel would thrill your kid's favorite
babysitter.)

>My children are not trophies to show off and then pushed away.

No, they are not. I have in-law problems sometimes, and I try, when
possible, to take a deep breath and consider whether I care enough about
*this* (and only this) issue enough to make a fuss. If so, there's nothing
wrong with standing against it. However, sometimes it's worth going along
with an idea I'm not crazy about for the sake of family peace.

Just my thoughts.

brenda