peer pressure at school
[email protected]
In a message dated 5/22/02 9:03:03 AM, ninnyridge03@... writes:
<< Peer pressure carries a LOT of weight with kids. That's another thing to
be grateful for home/unschooling. >>
My son Marty has a friend who was in school until earlier this year. He had
been homeschooled in third grade, then gone back to school, and mid-year his
mom took him out again. He's 14 now, so maybe 8th grade (give or take a
year).
When he was in school, he would come over here with black nail polish, his
hair some color or another, freakish clothes, shocking t-shirts (all
expensive), etc. He HAD to be noticed, in public. He HAD to do something
worthy of scorn or irritation or comment.
He never influenced my boys to want to be that way. If anything, it
reassured them that school was a bad influence on people who needed attention.
Once he started homeschooling, he dropped most of the weirdness totally.
Because the group he was trying to impress and live in now was homeschoolers
who were NOT impressed with money spent to stand out, nor with
self-agrrandizing stunts. And so although he's still interested in fashion,
he's buying plainer, higher-quality things instead of garish shock-stuff.
And he doesn't always have to be the center of attention when he's with these
kids. They wouldn't let him be, and unlike the kids at school, these guys
don't HAVE to hang out with him. So he changed!
Sandra
<< Peer pressure carries a LOT of weight with kids. That's another thing to
be grateful for home/unschooling. >>
My son Marty has a friend who was in school until earlier this year. He had
been homeschooled in third grade, then gone back to school, and mid-year his
mom took him out again. He's 14 now, so maybe 8th grade (give or take a
year).
When he was in school, he would come over here with black nail polish, his
hair some color or another, freakish clothes, shocking t-shirts (all
expensive), etc. He HAD to be noticed, in public. He HAD to do something
worthy of scorn or irritation or comment.
He never influenced my boys to want to be that way. If anything, it
reassured them that school was a bad influence on people who needed attention.
Once he started homeschooling, he dropped most of the weirdness totally.
Because the group he was trying to impress and live in now was homeschoolers
who were NOT impressed with money spent to stand out, nor with
self-agrrandizing stunts. And so although he's still interested in fashion,
he's buying plainer, higher-quality things instead of garish shock-stuff.
And he doesn't always have to be the center of attention when he's with these
kids. They wouldn't let him be, and unlike the kids at school, these guys
don't HAVE to hang out with him. So he changed!
Sandra
[email protected]
In a message dated 5/22/02 10:00:38 AM, ninnyridge03@... writes:
<< My point exactly. The influence of home life will override the negative
influence. BUT if your children were exposed to 8 hrs per day, 5 days a week
(or more, depending on what they're involved in in PS)of the kind of peer
pressure they would be subjected to in PS , would they still react the same
as now?? >>
OH no.
I was agreeing with you.
The benefit of making decisions based on what THEY really like instead of
what will impress the ever-changing mutitudes is a big advantage to
unschooling!
I'm saying "unschooling" instead of "homeschooling," because there are some
pretty regimented homeschoolers whose clothing options are limited for
cultural and religious reasons, and there are inter-group pressures for some
of those kids too.
Sandra
<< My point exactly. The influence of home life will override the negative
influence. BUT if your children were exposed to 8 hrs per day, 5 days a week
(or more, depending on what they're involved in in PS)of the kind of peer
pressure they would be subjected to in PS , would they still react the same
as now?? >>
OH no.
I was agreeing with you.
The benefit of making decisions based on what THEY really like instead of
what will impress the ever-changing mutitudes is a big advantage to
unschooling!
I'm saying "unschooling" instead of "homeschooling," because there are some
pretty regimented homeschoolers whose clothing options are limited for
cultural and religious reasons, and there are inter-group pressures for some
of those kids too.
Sandra
Betty Holder
----- Original Message -----
From: SandraDodd@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Wednesday, May 22, 2002 8:26 AM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] peer pressure at school
:
>>>>>He never influenced my boys to want to be that way. If anything, it
reassured them that school was a bad influence on people who needed attention.
Once he started homeschooling, he dropped most of the weirdness totally.
<<<<<
My point exactly. The influence of home life will override the negative influence. BUT if your children were exposed to 8 hrs per day, 5 days a week (or more, depending on what they're involved in in PS)of the kind of peer pressure they would be subjected to in PS , would they still react the same as now?? That's what I was refering to. IF my child was exposed to it I don't think that he would think the way he does NOW, because his thinking is GREATLY influenced by how he lives at home and by how we as a famnily live daily. We spend 24 hrs a day together (give or take a few now and then) and that has a GREAT deal to do with how he thinks. AGREE??
I hope this doesn't sound like I have no confidence in my son, I'm just being realistic. I've seen children (whom I thought were so solid in their values), change drastically because of PS influence.
Hey, I'm just thankful daily that we are at home. Learning up a storm!!! I don't intend to find out what PS would or would not do to or for us!
Betty- Happy at home, yes, Mary, life is GOOD!!!
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Tim Traaseth
Gosh I love reading you bunch, Aren't we fortunate to come to all these
great realizations, for example that we have great kids and they are so fun
to be with! I still have one child in ps and can't wait for the school year
to be done, she has decided to finish out the year and then stay at home
with the rest of us after that, Thank goodness! I Love being home and I
love reading the words "Life is good!" Thank you for your optimism, Kelli
T (not Tim)
great realizations, for example that we have great kids and they are so fun
to be with! I still have one child in ps and can't wait for the school year
to be done, she has decided to finish out the year and then stay at home
with the rest of us after that, Thank goodness! I Love being home and I
love reading the words "Life is good!" Thank you for your optimism, Kelli
T (not Tim)
----- Original Message -----
From: "Betty Holder" <ninnyridge03@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Wednesday, May 22, 2002 1:59 PM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] peer pressure at school
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: SandraDodd@...
> To: [email protected]
> Sent: Wednesday, May 22, 2002 8:26 AM
> Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] peer pressure at school
>
>
>
> :
> >>>>>He never influenced my boys to want to be that way. If anything,
it
> reassured them that school was a bad influence on people who needed
attention.
> Once he started homeschooling, he dropped most of the weirdness totally.
> <<<<<
>
> My point exactly. The influence of home life will override the negative
influence. BUT if your children were exposed to 8 hrs per day, 5 days a
week (or more, depending on what they're involved in in PS)of the kind of
peer pressure they would be subjected to in PS , would they still react the
same as now?? That's what I was refering to. IF my child was exposed to it
I don't think that he would think the way he does NOW, because his thinking
is GREATLY influenced by how he lives at home and by how we as a famnily
live daily. We spend 24 hrs a day together (give or take a few now and
then) and that has a GREAT deal to do with how he thinks. AGREE??
> I hope this doesn't sound like I have no confidence in my son, I'm just
being realistic. I've seen children (whom I thought were so solid in their
values), change drastically because of PS influence.
> Hey, I'm just thankful daily that we are at home. Learning up a storm!!!
I don't intend to find out what PS would or would not do to or for us!
> Betty- Happy at home, yes, Mary, life is GOOD!!!
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Sponsor
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> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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>
>
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