Heather Woodward

----- Original Message -----
From: Bonni Sollars
To: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 21, 2002 11:25 AM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: Andrea Yates


I read in a book that it was King Solomon who advocated spanking. His
son grew up to be a harsh ruler who caused the kindom to divide because
of it.

I haven't read anywhere in the BIBLE where King Solomon advocated spanking. I guess it's in how you look at it. You could infer that because he wrote the Proverbs some of them could be interpreted that way.

However, I think where most people get the idea of spanking is the Proverb "spare the rod, spoil the child". I think your analogy to shepards and their rods is correct.


Also, in other places
in the Bible, the rod implies the one shepherds used to guide their sheep
to keep them from going over a cliff and as a visual aid so their sheep
would know where the shepherd was-not something to beat the sheep with.


The crux of this proverb - as well as the bible as a whole deals with guiding - which is where I see a divergence from an unschooling philosophy. The belief that the parent is responsible in guiding the way of a child. In other words, if a child does something wrong - there should be a consequence- albeit a logical, reasonable one. I think there are many logical, reasonable consequences, and they are different depending on the situation,. and the child. If you allow certain behavior (ex. hitting, biting of other children) and don't do anything, or the "punishment/consequence" doesn't work for that child - a child continues is the behavior. Also what I have seen from my kids is that - a certain neighbor boy pinches (he's 4) - the mother puts him in time-out when he does this. He still pinches - so the time-out isn't working for him. I'm not sure what the answer is for her- at least on my end - if he pinches while at my house - he is sent home.

Overall if you think about it logically, a Shepherd didn't beat or hit the sheep - but he was responsible for guiding and protecting them - the rod may have been used to ward off other animals that tried to attack the sheep. And we wouldn't then take that statement to mean we should hit other people who threaten our children -

And when you think of how Jesus referred to children - it was with the utmost respect - in order to be in the kingdom of God - you must become as one of these(little children) - children have some virtues that we lose as adults -

Heather


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Fetteroll

on 3/22/02 12:51 AM, Heather Woodward at bacwoodz@... wrote:

> The belief that the parent is responsible in guiding the way of a child. In
> other words, if a child does something wrong - there should be a consequence-
> albeit a logical, reasonable one.

Those might be other words, but not the only other words. Being a role model
and trusting that kids sometimes have to explore the pros and cons of the
"wrong" way in order to see the wisdom of the right way can also be "other
words" for guiding.

Joyce


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