[email protected]

In a message dated 12/18/01 2:37:21 AM Pacific Standard Time,
[email protected] writes:

<< That's all I meant. The other thing that occurs to me to clarify is that I
think it isn't only our own childhood experiences that affect us, but our
current situation. I am with our two-and-a-half-year-old son all day and
night, living in the suburbs, with a husband who works very long hours. I'm
practicing attachment parenting, which I think has helped me immensely in
avoiding a repeat in the cycle of violence. But I don't have a real "tribe"
(see Jean Liedloff's Continuum Concept). I think people often underestimate
the degree to which our problems with our kids are related to being in a
very unnatural situation (being a sole adult alone with a small child much
of the day, having to call friends on the phone to arrange social
interaction in advance, not finding a lot of places where we can do adult
things and just have the kids tag along, etc.). >>

Elsa,

Wow, are we living similar lives with the exception I have two children!? It
is a struggle to avoid that hitting (spanking is just a nicer word) when that
is what you were raised with and have no other tools in our parenting bags to
pull out when a child is having an off day for whatever reason. However, I
am happy to say we have overcoming these issues...but still a struggle
looking for other tools.

<Bryant case>Boy, this is scary!!!! It scares the wits out of me... makes me
want to run for the hills and hide.

Julie
who wants to pretend she didn't read that case and that such things didn't
happen in our world!

rumpleteasermom

Elsa and Julie,
. . . and all you others with little children out there.

I just want to warn you about what happens when you practice
attachment parenting and treat your children like human beings from
the begining . . . I know this from experience . . .
You end up in a few years with best friends!!!!!

My girls are 16 and 14. I suddenly feel like I live in a commune
with four other adults . . . my girls, my dh and our 18 yo exhange
student. It's truly amazing!

However, I do remember those days when it felt like it was me and a
toddler, me and the kidlets, me and the house but NEVER me and other
adults. So hang in there.

Bridget



I am with our two-and-a-half-year-old son all day and
> night, living in the suburbs, with a husband who works very long
hours. I'm
> practicing attachment parenting, which I think has helped me
immensely in
> avoiding a repeat in the cycle of violence. But I don't have a
real "tribe"
> (see Jean Liedloff's Continuum Concept). I think people often
underestimate
> the degree to which our problems with our kids are related to
being in a
> very unnatural situation (being a sole adult alone with a small
child much
> of the day, having to call friends on the phone to arrange social
> interaction in advance, not finding a lot of places where we can
do adult
> things and just have the kids tag along, etc.). >>
>
> Elsa,
>
> Wow, are we living similar lives with the exception I have two
children!? It
> is a struggle to avoid that hitting (spanking is just a nicer word)
when that
> is what you were raised with and have no other tools in our
parenting bags to
> pull out when a child is having an off day for whatever reason.
> Julie