Pam Hartley

I made a foolish assumption that people would know what I meant by shouting
at children. Mea culpa.

If you are shouting over the noise of the lawn mower for everyone to come
quick, the cat is having kittens, that's one kind of shouting. If you are
shouting to a distant child that his friend George is at the door, that's
another kind of shouting.

If you are standing in a child's face shouting at him because he broke a
glass, spilled the milk, woke you up, colored on the walls, then you need
help and I don't want my kids around you.

More examples available on request.

Pam

Lynda

I was thinking about how people who were outside our house might perceive
the shouting. Guess I wasn't very clear. You can hear the shouting outside
but not much of the background noise. We had just been having a
conversation about this. Hubby came home and wanted to know why I was
"screaming at the kids." Both the kids and I looked at him like he was
crazy with a huh expression on our faces. Then it dawned on us that inside
the house we had the stereo going, youngest was playing the piano and the
boys were upstairs and I had "screamed" to let them know that lunch was
ready.

Lynda, who needs to remember that folks on the net can't :"hear" the
conversation that is going on simutaneously in the house <g>
----- Original Message -----
From: Pam Hartley <pamhartley@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Saturday, September 01, 2001 7:14 AM
Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: shouting


> I made a foolish assumption that people would know what I meant by
shouting
> at children. Mea culpa.
>
> If you are shouting over the noise of the lawn mower for everyone to come
> quick, the cat is having kittens, that's one kind of shouting. If you are
> shouting to a distant child that his friend George is at the door, that's
> another kind of shouting.
>
> If you are standing in a child's face shouting at him because he broke a
> glass, spilled the milk, woke you up, colored on the walls, then you need
> help and I don't want my kids around you.
>
> More examples available on request.
>
> Pam
>
>
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>

jefferson academy

>
> If you are standing in a child's face shouting at
> him because he broke a
> glass, spilled the milk, woke you up, colored on the
> walls, then you need
> help and I don't want my kids around you.

My whole family is loud - I'm loud and so are my
children and so is the background noise etc. and we do
sometimes shout to be heard over it and sometimes yell
from one end of the house to the other. But I also
admit to getting loud when upset (or even excited - as
in happy excited) I definitely raise my voice when
exasperated! My dd and I often 'yell' when upset -
perhaps it's cathartic for us - laughter often
follows. But you know what, I really don't think any
of us need help, and I'm not sure who would be
qualified to be judgmental enough to say we did.


=====
Michele
(mom of 5dd: Justice 22, Felicity 20, Christian 18, Grace 13, Elysian (Mia)2)

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R Meyers

Pam,
I sometimes shout at my kids and I don't think I need help, and I think perhaps I wouldn't my kids around someone like you who is so quick to judge others.
Rachel



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[email protected]

Another sometimes yeller here. I don't verbally abuse them in any way but
yes, I yell at times. It doesn't happen often but it does happen...part of
being human in my opinion.
Cheers,
Nina
******************************************************************************

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Johanna SanInocencio

our family says...
"I'm not loud, I'm Puerto Rican!"
(If you ever saw the TV show Quantum Leap a few years back about an angel
named Anjelita, you might remember.)
Johanna
Life is the ultimate learning experience!
----- Original Message -----
From: "Lynda" <lurine@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Saturday, September 01, 2001 12:56 PM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: shouting


> I was thinking about how people who were outside our house might perceive
> the shouting. Guess I wasn't very clear. You can hear the shouting
outside
> but not much of the background noise. We had just been having a
> conversation about this. Hubby came home and wanted to know why I was
> "screaming at the kids." Both the kids and I looked at him like he was
> crazy with a huh expression on our faces. Then it dawned on us that
inside
> the house we had the stereo going, youngest was playing the piano and the
> boys were upstairs and I had "screamed" to let them know that lunch was
> ready.
>
> Lynda, who needs to remember that folks on the net can't :"hear" the
> conversation that is going on simutaneously in the house <g>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Pam Hartley <pamhartley@...>
> To: <[email protected]>
> Sent: Saturday, September 01, 2001 7:14 AM
> Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: shouting
>
>
> > I made a foolish assumption that people would know what I meant by
> shouting
> > at children. Mea culpa.
> >
> > If you are shouting over the noise of the lawn mower for everyone to
come
> > quick, the cat is having kittens, that's one kind of shouting. If you
are
> > shouting to a distant child that his friend George is at the door,
that's
> > another kind of shouting.
> >
> > If you are standing in a child's face shouting at him because he broke a
> > glass, spilled the milk, woke you up, colored on the walls, then you
need
> > help and I don't want my kids around you.
> >
> > More examples available on request.
> >
> > Pam
> >
> >
> > Message boards, timely articles, a free newsletter and more!
> > Check it all out at: http://www.unschooling.com
> >
> > To unsubscribe, set preferences, or read archives:
> > http://www.egroups.com/group/Unschooling-dotcom
> >
> > Another great list sponsored by Home Education Magazine!
> > http://www.home-ed-magazine.com
> >
> >
> >
> > Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to
http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
> >
> >
>
>
>
> Message boards, timely articles, a free newsletter and more!
> Check it all out at: http://www.unschooling.com
>
> To unsubscribe, set preferences, or read archives:
> http://www.egroups.com/group/Unschooling-dotcom
>
> Another great list sponsored by Home Education Magazine!
> http://www.home-ed-magazine.com
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>
>
>

Lynda

First hubby's father was Italian, born in Italy, mother and father from
Italy and everything you see in the movies was true of this family and all
the other big Italian families I ever met--loud, shouting at each other,
roaring fights, slamming doors, screaming, etc. BUT, there is no doubt
whatsoever that everyone loves everyone else AND absolutely no one (and I
asked because it is a real culture shock when you first land in one of those
large gatherings!) is offended or wounded by it--"Oh that's just cousin
[whomever], that's just the way he is" all said with a look of fond
acceptance.

One should walk in the shoes perhaps first of a shouting/hollering/screaming
family.

Personally, the nastier piece of work I ever met and the poster child for
sterilization never lifted her voice once!

Lynda
----- Original Message -----
From: jefferson academy <jeffersonacademy@...>
To: <[email protected]>
Sent: Saturday, September 01, 2001 12:53 PM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Re: shouting


>
> >
> > If you are standing in a child's face shouting at
> > him because he broke a
> > glass, spilled the milk, woke you up, colored on the
> > walls, then you need
> > help and I don't want my kids around you.
>
> My whole family is loud - I'm loud and so are my
> children and so is the background noise etc. and we do
> sometimes shout to be heard over it and sometimes yell
> from one end of the house to the other. But I also
> admit to getting loud when upset (or even excited - as
> in happy excited) I definitely raise my voice when
> exasperated! My dd and I often 'yell' when upset -
> perhaps it's cathartic for us - laughter often
> follows. But you know what, I really don't think any
> of us need help, and I'm not sure who would be
> qualified to be judgmental enough to say we did.
>
>
> =====
> Michele
> (mom of 5dd: Justice 22, Felicity 20, Christian 18, Grace 13, Elysian
(Mia)2)
>
> __________________________________________________
> Do You Yahoo!?
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Messenger
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>
>
> Message boards, timely articles, a free newsletter and more!
> Check it all out at: http://www.unschooling.com
>
> To unsubscribe, set preferences, or read archives:
> http://www.egroups.com/group/Unschooling-dotcom
>
> Another great list sponsored by Home Education Magazine!
> http://www.home-ed-magazine.com
>
>
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
>
>

Johanna SanInocencio

> It comes down to what you are saying, words hurt worse than tone.

I disagree with this point. I had an english grandmother that could say
things like "that's lovely, dear" in a tone that made you feel like it was
the worst thing you could have ever done. She was also adept at intense
guilt trips. She hardly ever raised her voice or shouted. I often felt like
I was an immense failure to her and often would avoid her company.
Johanna
Life is the ultimate learning experience!

jefferson academy

> > It comes down to what you are saying, words
> hurt worse than tone.
>
> I disagree with this point.

We're one of the loud yelling families and one of the
worst things you can say in the middle of an argument
is "Come here and give me a hug!" I'm not even sure
why, or who started it, but the girls do that to each
other and it really gets a reaction out of the
opponent! I asked one dd why that is and she gave me
one of those just because type answers.
But words count too - like name calling can be the
absolute worst, especially if the person called the
name thinks it is true.



=====
Michele
(mom of 5dd: Justice 22, Felicity 20, Christian 18, Grace 13, Elysian (Mia)2)

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