Thank you.......(on the 12yo girl moving in)
[email protected]
to everyone for all of the wonderful advice about Kaity coming here to stay.
I have gotten quite a bit of wonderful and useful information. I truly
appreciate it!
I plan on having Jessie write a letter giving me temporary custody of Katie
and that, in the event of her death, full custody comes to us and having it
notarized. I also plan on having her pay us $100 a month (or would $200 a
month be better? What do parents of 1 child have to pay for child support?)
for food for Katie. I am not too worried about the gas, electric or water
bills. Those are never too high anyway. And I would expect Jesse to pay for
any clothes Katie needs, outgrows. Is there anything I have left out? Maybe
$200 a month would be better. And now that I think about it, it is. I
mean...she would still be paying for Kaity to eat and would still be buying
her personal items if Kaity was with her and I am sure that broken down that
is more than $200 a month.
I plan on having open girl to girl talks with her. I know that in 1 1/2 mos.
she won't get a lot from being homeschooled but I believe she will learn and
retain more just from reading and talking than she would at home.
I am not going to have a start date to end date put on the temp. custody
papers just in case Kaity ends up wanting to stay longer than June. For all I
know this temporary situation may turn in to a permanent one.
Luckily for me Kaity is not interested in sex. She does like to have
boyfriends but not here. She is only 12 and I made the older 2 wait until I
felt they were old enough to handle having a girlfriend (13 for both) and
then there are strict rules about being alone, kissing, hugging and holding
hands. I only allow group situations and she would always have to be with the
boys. I think that these are fair rules. I also believe she is anorexic or
borderline and I plan on making sure she eats 3 healthy meals a day and has
only healthy snacks available.
I will also spend time with her doing "girl stuff" plus we have family game
night 3 nights a week, go to the 50 cent movies 2-3 times a month as a
family, etc.. She and I may even walk to the ice cream parlor once or twice a
month and treat ourselves. I will also do this with the boys...take one at a
time with me to the ice cream parlor. This way all 5 get the same special
treatment. And every Sunday when Gary and the boys go out to do their "guy
stuff" Kaity and I will sit around and watch movies, maybe have a makeup
session, etc..
For me....remembering when I was 12 and what I liked to do is very hard. I
lived in a very abusive home at her age and was never allowed to have
friends, my step-mother never had time to do things with me, etc.. I didn't
experience a childhood like many others. I had a mother who gave me away when
I was 8 to live with my grandma and at 12 I moved in with my dad until I was
17. I never had anyone to have a mother/daughter relationship with. I guess
that's why I feel for Kaity. I want her to have a chance. Luckily my dh and
sons understand my need.
I guess it's not so hard to believe that when the boys are grown I would LOVE
to be a real foster mom!
I will try my darndest to make sure that she understands that being here is
NOT a punishment. It is because she is WANTED that she will be here.
Tracy
Wife to Gary since 10/22/85
Unschooling Mom to 4 sweet boys:
Crisstoffer ~ born 8/29/86,
Andru ~ born 1/8/88,
Wylliam ~ born 8/17/90,
&
Danyel ~ born 12/12/91
My Homepage
Our Family Photo Album Index
I have gotten quite a bit of wonderful and useful information. I truly
appreciate it!
I plan on having Jessie write a letter giving me temporary custody of Katie
and that, in the event of her death, full custody comes to us and having it
notarized. I also plan on having her pay us $100 a month (or would $200 a
month be better? What do parents of 1 child have to pay for child support?)
for food for Katie. I am not too worried about the gas, electric or water
bills. Those are never too high anyway. And I would expect Jesse to pay for
any clothes Katie needs, outgrows. Is there anything I have left out? Maybe
$200 a month would be better. And now that I think about it, it is. I
mean...she would still be paying for Kaity to eat and would still be buying
her personal items if Kaity was with her and I am sure that broken down that
is more than $200 a month.
I plan on having open girl to girl talks with her. I know that in 1 1/2 mos.
she won't get a lot from being homeschooled but I believe she will learn and
retain more just from reading and talking than she would at home.
I am not going to have a start date to end date put on the temp. custody
papers just in case Kaity ends up wanting to stay longer than June. For all I
know this temporary situation may turn in to a permanent one.
Luckily for me Kaity is not interested in sex. She does like to have
boyfriends but not here. She is only 12 and I made the older 2 wait until I
felt they were old enough to handle having a girlfriend (13 for both) and
then there are strict rules about being alone, kissing, hugging and holding
hands. I only allow group situations and she would always have to be with the
boys. I think that these are fair rules. I also believe she is anorexic or
borderline and I plan on making sure she eats 3 healthy meals a day and has
only healthy snacks available.
I will also spend time with her doing "girl stuff" plus we have family game
night 3 nights a week, go to the 50 cent movies 2-3 times a month as a
family, etc.. She and I may even walk to the ice cream parlor once or twice a
month and treat ourselves. I will also do this with the boys...take one at a
time with me to the ice cream parlor. This way all 5 get the same special
treatment. And every Sunday when Gary and the boys go out to do their "guy
stuff" Kaity and I will sit around and watch movies, maybe have a makeup
session, etc..
For me....remembering when I was 12 and what I liked to do is very hard. I
lived in a very abusive home at her age and was never allowed to have
friends, my step-mother never had time to do things with me, etc.. I didn't
experience a childhood like many others. I had a mother who gave me away when
I was 8 to live with my grandma and at 12 I moved in with my dad until I was
17. I never had anyone to have a mother/daughter relationship with. I guess
that's why I feel for Kaity. I want her to have a chance. Luckily my dh and
sons understand my need.
I guess it's not so hard to believe that when the boys are grown I would LOVE
to be a real foster mom!
I will try my darndest to make sure that she understands that being here is
NOT a punishment. It is because she is WANTED that she will be here.
Tracy
Wife to Gary since 10/22/85
Unschooling Mom to 4 sweet boys:
Crisstoffer ~ born 8/29/86,
Andru ~ born 1/8/88,
Wylliam ~ born 8/17/90,
&
Danyel ~ born 12/12/91
My Homepage
Our Family Photo Album Index
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/19/01 4:12:45 PM, Momma24Ratz@... writes:
<< I am not going to have a start date to end date put on the temp. custody
papers just in case Kaity ends up wanting to stay longer than June. >>
I don't think it will be legal without start and end dates.
<< I am not going to have a start date to end date put on the temp. custody
papers just in case Kaity ends up wanting to stay longer than June. >>
I don't think it will be legal without start and end dates.
Vaughnde Edwards
Yes you can have legal papers without the start and end
dates on them. I did...and no problems in the state of idaho, but she still
might want to check with her legal aid for her state.
-----Original Message-----
From: SandraDodd@... <SandraDodd@...>
To: [email protected] <[email protected]>
Date: Thursday, April 19, 2001 4:19 PM
Subject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Thank you.......(on the 12yo girl moving in)
In a message dated 4/19/01 4:12:45 PM, Momma24Ratz@... writes:
<< I am not going to have a start date to end date put on the temp. custody
papers just in case Kaity ends up wanting to stay longer than June. >>
I don't think it will be legal without start and end dates.
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[email protected]
In a message dated 4/19/01 6:21:49 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
SandraDodd@... writes:
I messed up. We'll have a start date. But the mother isn't exactly sure when
she wants Kaity back.
Tracy
Wife to Gary since 10/22/85
Unschooling Mom to 4 sweet boys:
Crisstoffer ~ born 8/29/86,
Andru ~ born 1/8/88,
Wylliam ~ born 8/17/90,
&
Danyel ~ born 12/12/91
My Homepage
Our Family Photo Album Index
SandraDodd@... writes:
I don't think it will be legal without start and end dates.
I messed up. We'll have a start date. But the mother isn't exactly sure when
she wants Kaity back.
Tracy
Wife to Gary since 10/22/85
Unschooling Mom to 4 sweet boys:
Crisstoffer ~ born 8/29/86,
Andru ~ born 1/8/88,
Wylliam ~ born 8/17/90,
&
Danyel ~ born 12/12/91
My Homepage
Our Family Photo Album Index
Lynda
You need a begin date, you do not need an end
date. You need permission to provide medical care. You need this
notorized in some states. There should be a statement to the effect that
the document can be revoked at the will of either party (you two decide what a
reasonable time frame is, one week, two week, a month) but that it must be in
writing so that you are covered.
there should also be a clause that you are not
responsible for any injury that is not due to a deliberate negligent act on your
part.
If you are going to homeschool the girl you also
need that in your contract. It doesn't have to be in any fancy legal
language with 50 cent words. It just have to be clear as to intent.
Make two copies and have them notorized. Make a photocopy of yours
and put the original in a safe place.
We've done this for years because you never
can tell when something that is "friendly" can suddenly deteriorate into
something that isn't and suddenly you are the bad guy.
Lynda
----- Original Message -----From: Momma24Ratz@...Sent: Thursday, April 19, 2001 4:19 PMSubject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Thank you.......(on the 12yo girl moving in)In a message dated 4/19/01 6:21:49 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
SandraDodd@... writes:
I don't think it will be legal without start and end dates.
I messed up. We'll have a start date. But the mother isn't exactly sure when
she wants Kaity back.
Tracy
Wife to Gary since 10/22/85
Unschooling Mom to 4 sweet boys:
Crisstoffer ~ born 8/29/86,
Andru ~ born 1/8/88,
Wylliam ~ born 8/17/90,
&
Danyel ~ born 12/12/91
My Homepage
Our Family Photo Album Index
Message boards, timely articles, a free newsletter and more!
Check it all out at: http://www.unschooling.com
To unsubscribe, set preferences, or read archives:
http://www.egroups.com/group/Unschooling-dotcom
Another great list sponsored by Home Education Magazine!
http://www.home-ed-magazine.com
Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
Johanna
If you put a review statement it will be.
Example: We will determine later whether she will be staying beyond this date.
That is how we did it in regards to my niece, who is with us right now.
Johanna
Life is the ultimate learning experience!
Life is the ultimate learning experience!
----- Original Message -----From: SandraDodd@...Sent: Thursday, April 19, 2001 5:19 PMSubject: Re: [Unschooling-dotcom] Thank you.......(on the 12yo girl moving in)
In a message dated 4/19/01 4:12:45 PM, Momma24Ratz@... writes:
<< I am not going to have a start date to end date put on the temp. custody
papers just in case Kaity ends up wanting to stay longer than June. >>
I don't think it will be legal without start and end dates.
Message boards, timely articles, a free newsletter and more!
Check it all out at: http://www.unschooling.com
To unsubscribe, set preferences, or read archives:
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Another great list sponsored by Home Education Magazine!
http://www.home-ed-magazine.com
Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
[email protected]
In a message dated 4/19/01 5:28:33 PM, Momma24Ratz@... writes:
<< I messed up. We'll have a start date. But the mother isn't exactly sure
when
she wants Kaity back. >>
The end date could be longer than you think then. But for her to give you
custody forever after, she might need to relinquish parental rights.
Sandra
<< I messed up. We'll have a start date. But the mother isn't exactly sure
when
she wants Kaity back. >>
The end date could be longer than you think then. But for her to give you
custody forever after, she might need to relinquish parental rights.
Sandra