Re: What Exactly Do You Do with Your Kids?
Pam Hartley
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clean up messes they create and are polite to each other, us, pets, and
guests (that goes both ways, we are also expected to be polite to them;
we're working on the cats, who are not always polite ;). That pretty much
covers it here.
young (6 and 3) and I'm not comfortable with them roaming the house while my
husband and I are both asleep, I do sometimes send them "to bed" when I'm
going to bed -- but I'm a night owl and rarely do they want to stay up later
than I do. I also remind them if we have some kind of earlier-than-usual
wakeup time (on Tuesday and Wednesday mornings we have to be out of the
house at 9 a.m., which doesn't sound early to "normal" folk, but is to us!
<g>) so they can learn the cause-and-effect of stay up late, get up early,
feel cranky. At 35, I still stay up too late even if I know I'm getting up
early, so I'm not real militant about "making them go to sleep".
concerned. <g>
Mine are not self-motivated. Yet. Or at least, rarely. Sometimes they
surprise me. I remind myself of two things: 1) If I want the house neat and
they don't, why should they do as much work as I do? and 2) I,
Pam-the-Organized, Plucky Girl Cleaner Who Feels Fussy if not Surrounded by
Order, didn't like chore lists and orders until I lived in my own house.
"How's that working out for you?" <g> Some kids are messy. Some are neat.
Some will do things without being asked, but the secret there is usually
that you have to STOP asking them, and wait for them to bloom into natural
housekeepers. This can be a long wait <g>. And if they aren't ever going to
be natural housekeepers (see my sister), you'll trip over their Legos until
they move out.
Homeschooling is going to be messy. Especially unschooling. If they were in
school, you could clean the house in an hour or so, it would STAY CLEAN
::Pam pauses to drool copiously, then sternly reminds herself that she'll
miss even the mess when her children are grown:: until they got home. Even
THEN, between homework, afterschool activities, dinner, bathtime, early
bedtime, there wouldn't be TIME to make much mess, so it would still stay
pretty clean.
Such is not the homeschooler's life. <g> You can improve things by
decluttering, investing in bins, doing things like "Power Cleaning" as a
group, with much singing, dancing and heck, go for prizes <g>) for 20
minutes each morning and night (this should do for a quick pickup, vaccuum,
dishes) and do the real housework yourself (toilets, laundry, mopping), or
let them earn extra money if they want it doing things "above and beyond"
the 20 minute segments.
have a fairly busy activity schedule (dance, ice skating, French, play
rehearsal, park day, Girl Scouts). Ideally, Wally and I try to get the
upstairs excavated and one major upstairs chore done every morning; then we
try to get the downstairs excavated and one major downstairs chore done
every night. Realistically, we fall short as often as we succeed. We like to
think we're modelling Real Life in this regard. <g>
Pam
>From: [email protected]Sometimes (not often) they walk. <g> The requirements are that they help
>To: [email protected]
>Subject: [Unschooling-dotcom] Digest Number 1134
>Date: Wed, Apr 18, 2001, 8:17 AM
>
> what exatly does your family do on a daily basis and are your children
> required to help around the house? are they just free to run and have no
> requirements on them at all?
clean up messes they create and are polite to each other, us, pets, and
guests (that goes both ways, we are also expected to be polite to them;
we're working on the cats, who are not always polite ;). That pretty much
covers it here.
>do they have wake and sleep times that areOnly if we're going somewhere do I wake them up. Because they are still very
> set?
young (6 and 3) and I'm not comfortable with them roaming the house while my
husband and I are both asleep, I do sometimes send them "to bed" when I'm
going to bed -- but I'm a night owl and rarely do they want to stay up later
than I do. I also remind them if we have some kind of earlier-than-usual
wakeup time (on Tuesday and Wednesday mornings we have to be out of the
house at 9 a.m., which doesn't sound early to "normal" folk, but is to us!
<g>) so they can learn the cause-and-effect of stay up late, get up early,
feel cranky. At 35, I still stay up too late even if I know I'm getting up
early, so I'm not real militant about "making them go to sleep".
> what about computer time and tv time is it regulated ?Nope. I'm a Libertarian, the fewer regulations the better as far as I'm
concerned. <g>
> how do you balance house keeping with everything else and are your childrenway?
> self motivated in any way to help with the house? if so how di they get that
Mine are not self-motivated. Yet. Or at least, rarely. Sometimes they
surprise me. I remind myself of two things: 1) If I want the house neat and
they don't, why should they do as much work as I do? and 2) I,
Pam-the-Organized, Plucky Girl Cleaner Who Feels Fussy if not Surrounded by
Order, didn't like chore lists and orders until I lived in my own house.
> at this point two of my older children would do nothing for the householdWell, regarding expectations I'll just quote the Maddeningly Sane Dr. Phil:
> at all and unless I continually remind and hound them about what I have
> asked for like watering the dogs or unloading the dishwasher, they will
> just play and do nothing instead they are 14 and 10 I think they should be
> able to help out around here without me asking.
> what are your veiws on all of this
"How's that working out for you?" <g> Some kids are messy. Some are neat.
Some will do things without being asked, but the secret there is usually
that you have to STOP asking them, and wait for them to bloom into natural
housekeepers. This can be a long wait <g>. And if they aren't ever going to
be natural housekeepers (see my sister), you'll trip over their Legos until
they move out.
Homeschooling is going to be messy. Especially unschooling. If they were in
school, you could clean the house in an hour or so, it would STAY CLEAN
::Pam pauses to drool copiously, then sternly reminds herself that she'll
miss even the mess when her children are grown:: until they got home. Even
THEN, between homework, afterschool activities, dinner, bathtime, early
bedtime, there wouldn't be TIME to make much mess, so it would still stay
pretty clean.
Such is not the homeschooler's life. <g> You can improve things by
decluttering, investing in bins, doing things like "Power Cleaning" as a
group, with much singing, dancing and heck, go for prizes <g>) for 20
minutes each morning and night (this should do for a quick pickup, vaccuum,
dishes) and do the real housework yourself (toilets, laundry, mopping), or
let them earn extra money if they want it doing things "above and beyond"
the 20 minute segments.
> I really need some insight as to attitudes in other peoples homes not justIn my household, my husband and I have a home business and unschool. My kids
> what you beleive would be the idealistic way to unschool but how it is
> really going down in your own households!
> thank you for your help in advance
> I do not require any school type work from them, but do have alot of other
> controlls going on that I would like to learn to let go of!
have a fairly busy activity schedule (dance, ice skating, French, play
rehearsal, park day, Girl Scouts). Ideally, Wally and I try to get the
upstairs excavated and one major upstairs chore done every morning; then we
try to get the downstairs excavated and one major downstairs chore done
every night. Realistically, we fall short as often as we succeed. We like to
think we're modelling Real Life in this regard. <g>
Pam