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In a message dated 1/13/2006 9:14:13 AM Eastern Standard Time,
soggyboysmom@... writes:

>>That's something that is really important to DH - being able to
just go out and get something when it's wanted (within typical
budgetary constraints and store hours and such). He got the 'wait
for your birthday/Christmas/' or 'earn it - do chores, get high
grades, etc' for things he wanted as a kid. Part of his own healing
is being able to do for DS what he wished had been done for him.<<<

My husband grew up in a very poor home, and he tends to show his love to the
kids by buying them things. It makes him feel really good that he can do
that for them. I used to discourage him to do so, feeling the whole "spoiled
thing" until I realized how much it meant to him.

He loves to be the one that takes them clothes shopping. He used to mandate
what type of clothes they can get, and I would protest, but I've learned
that backing away and letting the KIDS express their feelings about it has
softened his heart tremendously. We went to see Narnia at the mall and JC Penney
is having a HUGE sale, and HE took them around to each section and let them
pick what they wanted while I went to the book store! :o) Seeing how happy
they were picking funky type stuff does so much more than me griping that they
don't get to make their own choices.

Nancy B.




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