Couple mommy questions....
Kim J. Flowers
These are things that I haven't experienced with such extremity before with
my other kids.....
For the last few weeks, Conner (12 months old) has been so incredibly clingy
that if I am not holding him or sitting on the floor with him he screams. I
can't get anything done. Also, if one of the other boys sits in my lap he
screams and tears and pulls their hair and skin until they get up. I cannot
even read a book sitting by him or he will scream and climb on me until I
put it down. Even if one of the other boys touches one of his toys he
screams bloody murder until they stop touching it. Right now as I am typing
with one finger, he is screaming at me. Any suggestions or ideas as to how
long this lasts or anything?? I know he isn't sick or not feeling well. He
is a completely different baby when he is sick or teething. I mean this is
so incredibly extreme. The other boys went through clingy stages, but not
like this. I have even tried having him help me when I need to do
something, but he won't. If my complete attention is not on him, he screams
at me. I have no idea what is going on. We have never just left him to
cry, or ignored his needs or anything like that. But he is acting like if
he doesn't scream, his needs won't get met which has never been the case.
Also, I have never experienced this either with any of the other boys.
Conner will NOT use a sippy cup, straw cup or anything else. We have tried
several different brands. I don't want to take his bottle away, but I would
like him to use a cup during awake times. Suggestions? I do eventually want
to wean him off his bottle, but I have to get him to take a cup first! He
simply won't do it and I don't want to force him or anything. I guess I was
just hoping he would want to use a cup.
He also still doesn't sleep through the night. Only one of my other kids
(who didn't sleep for longer than 2 hours until the age of 3) went through
this. I am not so much worried about this part, but any suggestions would
be helpful. He still eats at night too.
Thanks for any help or suggestions with my littlest guy!
Kim Flowers - Wife to Nolan for 10 years
Stay at Home Mama of 4 wonderful boys
"I would rather have someone hate me for who I am than like me for who
I am not".
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
my other kids.....
For the last few weeks, Conner (12 months old) has been so incredibly clingy
that if I am not holding him or sitting on the floor with him he screams. I
can't get anything done. Also, if one of the other boys sits in my lap he
screams and tears and pulls their hair and skin until they get up. I cannot
even read a book sitting by him or he will scream and climb on me until I
put it down. Even if one of the other boys touches one of his toys he
screams bloody murder until they stop touching it. Right now as I am typing
with one finger, he is screaming at me. Any suggestions or ideas as to how
long this lasts or anything?? I know he isn't sick or not feeling well. He
is a completely different baby when he is sick or teething. I mean this is
so incredibly extreme. The other boys went through clingy stages, but not
like this. I have even tried having him help me when I need to do
something, but he won't. If my complete attention is not on him, he screams
at me. I have no idea what is going on. We have never just left him to
cry, or ignored his needs or anything like that. But he is acting like if
he doesn't scream, his needs won't get met which has never been the case.
Also, I have never experienced this either with any of the other boys.
Conner will NOT use a sippy cup, straw cup or anything else. We have tried
several different brands. I don't want to take his bottle away, but I would
like him to use a cup during awake times. Suggestions? I do eventually want
to wean him off his bottle, but I have to get him to take a cup first! He
simply won't do it and I don't want to force him or anything. I guess I was
just hoping he would want to use a cup.
He also still doesn't sleep through the night. Only one of my other kids
(who didn't sleep for longer than 2 hours until the age of 3) went through
this. I am not so much worried about this part, but any suggestions would
be helpful. He still eats at night too.
Thanks for any help or suggestions with my littlest guy!
Kim Flowers - Wife to Nolan for 10 years
Stay at Home Mama of 4 wonderful boys
"I would rather have someone hate me for who I am than like me for who
I am not".
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sylvia Toyama
Also, I have never experienced this either with any of the other boys. Conner will NOT use a sippy cup, straw cup or anything else. We have tried several different brands. I don't want to take his bottle away, but I would like him to use a cup during awake times. Suggestions? I do eventually want to wean him off his bottle, but I have to get him to take a cup first! He simply won't do it and I don't want to force him or anything. I guess I was just hoping he would want to use a cup.
*****
If the bottle is what makes him happy, let him have it. I have three boys who nursed for varying lengths of time -- the oldest two weaned before 1 year, and both took a bottle well past one year. The oldest was a few months past 2, the second was a few months past 3 when we gave up bottles. The youngest is almost 5 and has promised he will wean on his birthday next month. None used a cup by 12 mos, or even 24 mos reliably.
I don't understand the big rush parents (more likely doctors) seem to have to get a child off the bottle by 12 mos. Figuring that current life expectancy is 85 yrs, then nursing, or using a bottle -- or whatever meets the sucking need (a valid physical and emotional need, btw) for even 4 years is a tiny portion of his whole life. It's not like a child who isn't using a cup at 12 mos will still be using a bottle & nipple at 7 or 8 (tho some do still thumb-suck at those ages).
Sylvia
Mom to Will (20) Andy (9) and Dan (4.5)
---------------------------------
Yahoo! DSL Something to write home about. Just $16.99/mo. or less
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
*****
If the bottle is what makes him happy, let him have it. I have three boys who nursed for varying lengths of time -- the oldest two weaned before 1 year, and both took a bottle well past one year. The oldest was a few months past 2, the second was a few months past 3 when we gave up bottles. The youngest is almost 5 and has promised he will wean on his birthday next month. None used a cup by 12 mos, or even 24 mos reliably.
I don't understand the big rush parents (more likely doctors) seem to have to get a child off the bottle by 12 mos. Figuring that current life expectancy is 85 yrs, then nursing, or using a bottle -- or whatever meets the sucking need (a valid physical and emotional need, btw) for even 4 years is a tiny portion of his whole life. It's not like a child who isn't using a cup at 12 mos will still be using a bottle & nipple at 7 or 8 (tho some do still thumb-suck at those ages).
Sylvia
Mom to Will (20) Andy (9) and Dan (4.5)
---------------------------------
Yahoo! DSL Something to write home about. Just $16.99/mo. or less
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Sandra Dodd
First I want to say that this discussion probably should be dealt
with lightly and we should go on to more directly unschooling-related
things. This question might be better for a list about very young
children. Maybe a La Leche League list would be better.
-=-I know he isn't sick or not feeling well.-=-
You don't *KNOW* that, so maybe the strongest you should've said was
"I don't think" or "I don't see symptoms that..."
My nephew seemed VERY unhappy for a long while when he was a year
old, and couldn't seem to get comfortable, and car seats made him
scream worse than anything, and after they tested everything they
could think of, it turned out one of his testicles was growing in a
weird kind of spirally way and it just hurt all the time. For that
he had no fever, no snot, no listlessness. There were no symptoms of
not feeling well.
I'm not suggesting your son has a testicular condition, I'm saying
you shouldn't be so sure that you *know* he's feeling fine.
-=-Conner will NOT use a sippy cup, straw cup or anything else. We
have tried
several different brands. I don't want to take his bottle away, but I
would
like him to use a cup during awake times. Suggestions? I do
eventually want
to wean him off his bottle-=-
OH...You're not nursing him?
Bummer. That itself could be helpful.
It's not worth "weaning" him off a bottle especially if he's needy
right now. What's the point? Are you in a competition with some
other family to get your kid "weaned"? Let him have the friggin'
bottle.
-=-but I have to get him to take a cup first! He
simply won't do it and I don't want to force him or anything. I
guess I was
just hoping he would want to use a cup.-=-
You're not just hoping, though. You're pressuring him with several
different brands.
Maybe he feels like you're trying to keep him from being the baby (or
a baby) and that's why he's exerting his babyness.
Sandra
with lightly and we should go on to more directly unschooling-related
things. This question might be better for a list about very young
children. Maybe a La Leche League list would be better.
-=-I know he isn't sick or not feeling well.-=-
You don't *KNOW* that, so maybe the strongest you should've said was
"I don't think" or "I don't see symptoms that..."
My nephew seemed VERY unhappy for a long while when he was a year
old, and couldn't seem to get comfortable, and car seats made him
scream worse than anything, and after they tested everything they
could think of, it turned out one of his testicles was growing in a
weird kind of spirally way and it just hurt all the time. For that
he had no fever, no snot, no listlessness. There were no symptoms of
not feeling well.
I'm not suggesting your son has a testicular condition, I'm saying
you shouldn't be so sure that you *know* he's feeling fine.
-=-Conner will NOT use a sippy cup, straw cup or anything else. We
have tried
several different brands. I don't want to take his bottle away, but I
would
like him to use a cup during awake times. Suggestions? I do
eventually want
to wean him off his bottle-=-
OH...You're not nursing him?
Bummer. That itself could be helpful.
It's not worth "weaning" him off a bottle especially if he's needy
right now. What's the point? Are you in a competition with some
other family to get your kid "weaned"? Let him have the friggin'
bottle.
-=-but I have to get him to take a cup first! He
simply won't do it and I don't want to force him or anything. I
guess I was
just hoping he would want to use a cup.-=-
You're not just hoping, though. You're pressuring him with several
different brands.
Maybe he feels like you're trying to keep him from being the baby (or
a baby) and that's why he's exerting his babyness.
Sandra
Sylvia Toyama
First I want to say that this discussion probably should be dealt with lightly and we should go on to more directly unschooling-related things. This question might be better for a list about very young children. Maybe a La Leche League list would be better.
****
I had wondered about this, but forgot which list it was. It would be a good topic for the Always Unschooled list at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlwaysUnschooled/ . Not so much LaLeche League as it's not really about nursing, tho I guess it could fit in the gentle parenting themes.
Sylvia
Mom to Will (20) Andy (9) and Dan (4.5)
---------------------------------
Yahoo! for Good - Make a difference this year.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
****
I had wondered about this, but forgot which list it was. It would be a good topic for the Always Unschooled list at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlwaysUnschooled/ . Not so much LaLeche League as it's not really about nursing, tho I guess it could fit in the gentle parenting themes.
Sylvia
Mom to Will (20) Andy (9) and Dan (4.5)
---------------------------------
Yahoo! for Good - Make a difference this year.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
NANCY OWENS
Get your little guy a sling. You don't even have to go out an spend $$$ on one. There are free patterns on-line. My sister has this great vintage sheet (twin sized, and the material used in sheets is perfect for slings) that she folds and ties at her shoulder or wraps it around her waist and back to sling her youngest behind her like Asian women do. There is a book called Baby-Gami or something like that (maybe baby origami?) anyway it shows all sorts of unique ways to bundle babies of all ages and it has quite a nice section on slings and how to make some great ones. I saw it the other day at the library and flipped through it, keeping it in mind for this spring. If you sling him, on your side or on your back he can always be with you and you can still have the other boys with you, you can cook, clean, what ever needs done at that moment. AND he gets in on allll the action.
It's too bad you aren't nursing. I assume there were some sort of issues. I think doctors and dentists want toddlers off the bottle because the nipple isn't natural and it (can?) affects tooth development. (I know I have personal beliefs that pop up when I see a child older than a year or so with a bottle or pacifier, but those are mostly those nasty little voices of friends and relatives that I have learned to ignore. Maybe if it is those voices, your mom, mom-in-law, who ever that is in your head telling you to get him off, can you work hard on ignoring them?) That aside, let him have that bottle for some more time. Both my kids nursed till around three. BUT Jack still had a need for me, my warmth, softness, smell, something. When he was hurt, tired, grumpy, he would climb on my lap, curl up against my breast, and slip a hand inside or up my shirt and put his hand between my breasts and kind of pet the top side, above my bra line. Used to drive Darin crazy. <g> He was so ready
for those to be *ours* again!
Darin got our Tinkerbell a little (very, omg, soft) stuffed monkey for Christmas. I'm already sleeping with it in anticipation of her birth. That way if there are times I absolutely can't hold her, or someone else is, I can wrap it up with her too. I did that for both the other kids. Moly loved her's, Jack must've known there was no substitute for mom. <g> If you don't already, can you start sleeping with your little guy? Bring his favorite animal or blanket to bed with you too. That way it starts smelling like you. I know this sounds like promoting a wookie or whatever, but if it works...
As for the others *touching* his toys and him not liking that at all... Are they old enough for you to explain that, for the time being, they need to let the youngest be the youngest? Does that make sense? I have a boy and girl, very close in age, so many toys are shared, but there are also (and more so as they have gotten older) many more things that are just Moly's or just Jack's. Are your others old enough to understand that concept? Its hard, I know, but not as hard as being attacked by a one year old, who doesn't have the capacity to understand sharing. And you really can't expect him to.
Good luck!
~Nancy
"Kim J. Flowers" <kim@...> wrote:
These are things that I haven't experienced with such extremity before with
my other kids.....
For the last few weeks, Conner (12 months old) has been so incredibly clingy
that if I am not holding him or sitting on the floor with him he screams.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
It's too bad you aren't nursing. I assume there were some sort of issues. I think doctors and dentists want toddlers off the bottle because the nipple isn't natural and it (can?) affects tooth development. (I know I have personal beliefs that pop up when I see a child older than a year or so with a bottle or pacifier, but those are mostly those nasty little voices of friends and relatives that I have learned to ignore. Maybe if it is those voices, your mom, mom-in-law, who ever that is in your head telling you to get him off, can you work hard on ignoring them?) That aside, let him have that bottle for some more time. Both my kids nursed till around three. BUT Jack still had a need for me, my warmth, softness, smell, something. When he was hurt, tired, grumpy, he would climb on my lap, curl up against my breast, and slip a hand inside or up my shirt and put his hand between my breasts and kind of pet the top side, above my bra line. Used to drive Darin crazy. <g> He was so ready
for those to be *ours* again!
Darin got our Tinkerbell a little (very, omg, soft) stuffed monkey for Christmas. I'm already sleeping with it in anticipation of her birth. That way if there are times I absolutely can't hold her, or someone else is, I can wrap it up with her too. I did that for both the other kids. Moly loved her's, Jack must've known there was no substitute for mom. <g> If you don't already, can you start sleeping with your little guy? Bring his favorite animal or blanket to bed with you too. That way it starts smelling like you. I know this sounds like promoting a wookie or whatever, but if it works...
As for the others *touching* his toys and him not liking that at all... Are they old enough for you to explain that, for the time being, they need to let the youngest be the youngest? Does that make sense? I have a boy and girl, very close in age, so many toys are shared, but there are also (and more so as they have gotten older) many more things that are just Moly's or just Jack's. Are your others old enough to understand that concept? Its hard, I know, but not as hard as being attacked by a one year old, who doesn't have the capacity to understand sharing. And you really can't expect him to.
Good luck!
~Nancy
"Kim J. Flowers" <kim@...> wrote:
These are things that I haven't experienced with such extremity before with
my other kids.....
For the last few weeks, Conner (12 months old) has been so incredibly clingy
that if I am not holding him or sitting on the floor with him he screams.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Su Penn
I have a 4 1/2 year old who never nursed (broke my heart). He still
takes a bottle, which we like because it keeps him so well hydrated.
Last summer, when my friends were all worrying about their kids
drinking enough, I knew Eric was drinking enough because he was
having 3-4 8 oz bottles of mixed (soy or dairy) milk and water every
day as well as whatever other drinks he wanted. It helped me relax
about him having it when a friend who is a pediatrician said to me,
"Su, why worry about it? It's just another way of having a drink!"
She also seconded the idea that kids have a strong need to suck until
they're 6 or even older.
Eric is also a thumb-sucker, and he has performed auto-orthodontia to
the extent that he has a perfect little thumb-sized gap between his
upper two left teeth. I was getting a lot of pressure from my dentist
to "make him stop" (as if I could!), so I did a lot of research, and
found that even though your dentist might tell you bottles, thumb-
sucking, pacifiers etc. can damage teeth (or even damage the bones of
the face), the research doesn't back that up. One article I found
that reviewed the literature from dental journals found that even
though kids can move their teeth with these things, any problems
usually self-correct if the kids stop by the time they're 6 or 7, and
that even if the kids don't, it doesn't create any additional need
for orthodontia beyond what they would have needed anyway. A big
relief to me. I'd be glad to hunt up a reference if anyone wants it
but I'm already making the whole family late so I won't do it right now.
I'm just tossing that out there. Nancy said she has a personal
reaction to older kids with pacifiers and bottles; since I have had a
personal investment in this question, I've done a little research and
thought I'd share it.
Su (who can remember getting uncomfortable when kids who were old
enough to talk were still nursing...how we change! And who still
hates to see kids carrying bottles of juice around the grocery
store :-/ )
takes a bottle, which we like because it keeps him so well hydrated.
Last summer, when my friends were all worrying about their kids
drinking enough, I knew Eric was drinking enough because he was
having 3-4 8 oz bottles of mixed (soy or dairy) milk and water every
day as well as whatever other drinks he wanted. It helped me relax
about him having it when a friend who is a pediatrician said to me,
"Su, why worry about it? It's just another way of having a drink!"
She also seconded the idea that kids have a strong need to suck until
they're 6 or even older.
Eric is also a thumb-sucker, and he has performed auto-orthodontia to
the extent that he has a perfect little thumb-sized gap between his
upper two left teeth. I was getting a lot of pressure from my dentist
to "make him stop" (as if I could!), so I did a lot of research, and
found that even though your dentist might tell you bottles, thumb-
sucking, pacifiers etc. can damage teeth (or even damage the bones of
the face), the research doesn't back that up. One article I found
that reviewed the literature from dental journals found that even
though kids can move their teeth with these things, any problems
usually self-correct if the kids stop by the time they're 6 or 7, and
that even if the kids don't, it doesn't create any additional need
for orthodontia beyond what they would have needed anyway. A big
relief to me. I'd be glad to hunt up a reference if anyone wants it
but I'm already making the whole family late so I won't do it right now.
I'm just tossing that out there. Nancy said she has a personal
reaction to older kids with pacifiers and bottles; since I have had a
personal investment in this question, I've done a little research and
thought I'd share it.
Su (who can remember getting uncomfortable when kids who were old
enough to talk were still nursing...how we change! And who still
hates to see kids carrying bottles of juice around the grocery
store :-/ )
On Dec 30, 2005, at 12:04 AM, NANCY OWENS wrote:
> It's too bad you aren't nursing. I assume there were some sort of
> issues. I think doctors and dentists want toddlers off the bottle
> because the nipple isn't natural and it (can?) affects tooth
> development. (I know I have personal beliefs that pop up when I see
> a child older than a year or so with a bottle or pacifier, but
> those are mostly those nasty little voices of friends and relatives
> that I have learned to ignore. Maybe if it is those voices, your
> mom, mom-in-law, who ever that is in your head telling you to get
> him off, can you work hard on ignoring them?) That aside, let him
> have that bottle for some more time.
NANCY OWENS
Su Penn <supenn@...> wrote: ****I'm just tossing that out there. Nancy said she has a personal
reaction to older kids with pacifiers and bottles; since I have had a
personal investment in this question, I've done a little research and
thought I'd share it.
Su (who can remember getting uncomfortable when kids who were old
enough to talk were still nursing...how we change! And who still
hates to see kids carrying bottles of juice around the grocery
store :-/ )*****
Well, I did write that my reaction was all about those nasty voices we were discussing on another thread. <g> Just one more thing to work on. And I tell myself, when I catch myself thinking bad things (when I see an older child with a bottle or pacifier), that these kids moms are the same moms who used to look badly at me when they saw me nursing my three year olds! (or worse when I was tandem nursing a newborn and a two year old) Now I say to myself, 'Why get upset? This isn't your concern, these kids are meeting their needs just like your kids met theirs.' And I ask myself where the negative thoughts come from. My mom, grandma, aunts, friends, MIL... the list is endless. All of these same women chastised me for nursing so long. But in the beginning it was all, 'oh wonderful, your doing whats best for the baby...' My sister will wink and nudge me as she asks if I'm going to be a lactivist or a breast-nazi with this new one. So really, it doesn't matter, are the kids happy? Are
they getting their suck needs met? Does it matter how? You are going to get looks if you nurse much past a year, or if your child has a bottle, pacifier, or thumb in his mouth past two. Its all about social acceptance. You already buck the norm by homeschooling, you've really rocked the boat by unschooling, let your little guy have his bottle till he's ready to give it up. Put all those nifty four and six dollar cups up until he asks for them. With three older brothers he'll want a cup soon enough. Then you'll start missing those baby days. <g> ~Nancy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
reaction to older kids with pacifiers and bottles; since I have had a
personal investment in this question, I've done a little research and
thought I'd share it.
Su (who can remember getting uncomfortable when kids who were old
enough to talk were still nursing...how we change! And who still
hates to see kids carrying bottles of juice around the grocery
store :-/ )*****
Well, I did write that my reaction was all about those nasty voices we were discussing on another thread. <g> Just one more thing to work on. And I tell myself, when I catch myself thinking bad things (when I see an older child with a bottle or pacifier), that these kids moms are the same moms who used to look badly at me when they saw me nursing my three year olds! (or worse when I was tandem nursing a newborn and a two year old) Now I say to myself, 'Why get upset? This isn't your concern, these kids are meeting their needs just like your kids met theirs.' And I ask myself where the negative thoughts come from. My mom, grandma, aunts, friends, MIL... the list is endless. All of these same women chastised me for nursing so long. But in the beginning it was all, 'oh wonderful, your doing whats best for the baby...' My sister will wink and nudge me as she asks if I'm going to be a lactivist or a breast-nazi with this new one. So really, it doesn't matter, are the kids happy? Are
they getting their suck needs met? Does it matter how? You are going to get looks if you nurse much past a year, or if your child has a bottle, pacifier, or thumb in his mouth past two. Its all about social acceptance. You already buck the norm by homeschooling, you've really rocked the boat by unschooling, let your little guy have his bottle till he's ready to give it up. Put all those nifty four and six dollar cups up until he asks for them. With three older brothers he'll want a cup soon enough. Then you'll start missing those baby days. <g> ~Nancy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kim J. Flowers
Well, he has been checked out by the doc. Nothing physical that they found.
BUT, I took the sling idea (sorta). I carried him around in the backpack
that we usually only use when we go hiking, well, it worked like a charm! I
carried him around in it all day! I got an amazing amount of work done
around the house! FANTASTIC IDEA!!!
Kim Flowers - Wife to Nolan for 10 years
Stay at Home Mama of 4 wonderful boys
"I would rather have someone hate me for who I am than like me for who
I am not".
_____
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of NANCY OWENS
Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2005 11:05 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [UnschoolingDiscussion] Couple mommy questions....
Get your little guy a sling. You don't even have to go out an spend $$$ on
one. There are free patterns on-line. My sister has this great vintage sheet
(twin sized, and the material used in sheets is perfect for slings) that she
folds and ties at her shoulder or wraps it around her waist and back to
sling her youngest behind her like Asian women do. There is a book called
Baby-Gami or something like that (maybe baby origami?) anyway it shows all
sorts of unique ways to bundle babies of all ages and it has quite a nice
section on slings and how to make some great ones. I saw it the other day at
the library and flipped through it, keeping it in mind for this spring. If
you sling him, on your side or on your back he can always be with you and
you can still have the other boys with you, you can cook, clean, what ever
needs done at that moment. AND he gets in on allll the action.
It's too bad you aren't nursing. I assume there were some sort of issues.
I think doctors and dentists want toddlers off the bottle because the nipple
isn't natural and it (can?) affects tooth development. (I know I have
personal beliefs that pop up when I see a child older than a year or so with
a bottle or pacifier, but those are mostly those nasty little voices of
friends and relatives that I have learned to ignore. Maybe if it is those
voices, your mom, mom-in-law, who ever that is in your head telling you to
get him off, can you work hard on ignoring them?) That aside, let him have
that bottle for some more time. Both my kids nursed till around three. BUT
Jack still had a need for me, my warmth, softness, smell, something. When he
was hurt, tired, grumpy, he would climb on my lap, curl up against my
breast, and slip a hand inside or up my shirt and put his hand between my
breasts and kind of pet the top side, above my bra line. Used to drive Darin
crazy. <g> He was so ready
for those to be *ours* again!
Darin got our Tinkerbell a little (very, omg, soft) stuffed monkey for
Christmas. I'm already sleeping with it in anticipation of her birth. That
way if there are times I absolutely can't hold her, or someone else is, I
can wrap it up with her too. I did that for both the other kids. Moly loved
her's, Jack must've known there was no substitute for mom. <g> If you don't
already, can you start sleeping with your little guy? Bring his favorite
animal or blanket to bed with you too. That way it starts smelling like you.
I know this sounds like promoting a wookie or whatever, but if it works...
As for the others *touching* his toys and him not liking that at all...
Are they old enough for you to explain that, for the time being, they need
to let the youngest be the youngest? Does that make sense? I have a boy and
girl, very close in age, so many toys are shared, but there are also (and
more so as they have gotten older) many more things that are just Moly's or
just Jack's. Are your others old enough to understand that concept? Its
hard, I know, but not as hard as being attacked by a one year old, who
doesn't have the capacity to understand sharing. And you really can't expect
him to.
Good luck!
~Nancy
"Kim J. Flowers" <kim@...> wrote:
These are things that I haven't experienced with such extremity before
with
my other kids.....
For the last few weeks, Conner (12 months old) has been so incredibly clingy
that if I am not holding him or sitting on the floor with him he screams.
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BUT, I took the sling idea (sorta). I carried him around in the backpack
that we usually only use when we go hiking, well, it worked like a charm! I
carried him around in it all day! I got an amazing amount of work done
around the house! FANTASTIC IDEA!!!
Kim Flowers - Wife to Nolan for 10 years
Stay at Home Mama of 4 wonderful boys
"I would rather have someone hate me for who I am than like me for who
I am not".
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From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of NANCY OWENS
Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2005 11:05 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [UnschoolingDiscussion] Couple mommy questions....
Get your little guy a sling. You don't even have to go out an spend $$$ on
one. There are free patterns on-line. My sister has this great vintage sheet
(twin sized, and the material used in sheets is perfect for slings) that she
folds and ties at her shoulder or wraps it around her waist and back to
sling her youngest behind her like Asian women do. There is a book called
Baby-Gami or something like that (maybe baby origami?) anyway it shows all
sorts of unique ways to bundle babies of all ages and it has quite a nice
section on slings and how to make some great ones. I saw it the other day at
the library and flipped through it, keeping it in mind for this spring. If
you sling him, on your side or on your back he can always be with you and
you can still have the other boys with you, you can cook, clean, what ever
needs done at that moment. AND he gets in on allll the action.
It's too bad you aren't nursing. I assume there were some sort of issues.
I think doctors and dentists want toddlers off the bottle because the nipple
isn't natural and it (can?) affects tooth development. (I know I have
personal beliefs that pop up when I see a child older than a year or so with
a bottle or pacifier, but those are mostly those nasty little voices of
friends and relatives that I have learned to ignore. Maybe if it is those
voices, your mom, mom-in-law, who ever that is in your head telling you to
get him off, can you work hard on ignoring them?) That aside, let him have
that bottle for some more time. Both my kids nursed till around three. BUT
Jack still had a need for me, my warmth, softness, smell, something. When he
was hurt, tired, grumpy, he would climb on my lap, curl up against my
breast, and slip a hand inside or up my shirt and put his hand between my
breasts and kind of pet the top side, above my bra line. Used to drive Darin
crazy. <g> He was so ready
for those to be *ours* again!
Darin got our Tinkerbell a little (very, omg, soft) stuffed monkey for
Christmas. I'm already sleeping with it in anticipation of her birth. That
way if there are times I absolutely can't hold her, or someone else is, I
can wrap it up with her too. I did that for both the other kids. Moly loved
her's, Jack must've known there was no substitute for mom. <g> If you don't
already, can you start sleeping with your little guy? Bring his favorite
animal or blanket to bed with you too. That way it starts smelling like you.
I know this sounds like promoting a wookie or whatever, but if it works...
As for the others *touching* his toys and him not liking that at all...
Are they old enough for you to explain that, for the time being, they need
to let the youngest be the youngest? Does that make sense? I have a boy and
girl, very close in age, so many toys are shared, but there are also (and
more so as they have gotten older) many more things that are just Moly's or
just Jack's. Are your others old enough to understand that concept? Its
hard, I know, but not as hard as being attacked by a one year old, who
doesn't have the capacity to understand sharing. And you really can't expect
him to.
Good luck!
~Nancy
"Kim J. Flowers" <kim@...> wrote:
These are things that I haven't experienced with such extremity before
with
my other kids.....
For the last few weeks, Conner (12 months old) has been so incredibly clingy
that if I am not holding him or sitting on the floor with him he screams.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
"List Posting Policies" are provided in the files area of this group.
Visit the Unschooling website and message boards:
<http://www.unschooling.info>
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