Adults Insulting Children
m59z85
We went for an outing yesterday with our homeschool group. As we
were walking along through a park my dd Sarah, age 6, sat down on a
bench and said, "Oh, I am so hungry," while holding her stomach.
Another mother was walking along beside us and said, "Oh, listen to
you, you drama queen."
Sarah asked, "What's a drama queen." I tried to explain it the best
I could--"like on TV or a show" and I acted it out a bit.
Sarah then became so angry she she stood in the path behind us and
began to sputter, "Well, I, but, but, but . . ."
The other mother looked back at Sarah and said, "I hope you're not
having an asthma attack."
I put my arm around Sarah and leaned down and she said, "But I don't
want her to call me a drama queen. I don't want to talk to her
anymore."
I said, "You are not a drama queen. I think she was joking. Now
let's
get back to the car where I have some snacks and drinks."
Sarah said, "I don't think it's funny. I don't like this joke."
The other mother then said, "Oh, I was just joking but I guess it
wasn't funny to you. I'm sorry. Can I call you Sleeping Beauty?"
Sarah said, "No, just call me Sarah."
The other mother then walked on ahead and I tried to explain labels
to Sarah. And how some grown-ups insult kids because they don't
want to hear what they have to say. And how it's OK to say you are
hungry when you are.
The funny part is this other mother had asked me about the Live and
Learn Conference and I had shown her Rue Kream's book which I had
brought for another friend to read. (Still working on Sandra's!)
This other mother opened the book to the part about doing things for
kids even when they are able to do for themselves. The other mother
and I got in to a discussion during which she said "kids have to do
for themselves or else they will always take the easy way out." I
disagreed and told her so. (BTW, her kids are 5, 3 and 1!)
This kept me awake last night as I felt that I should have done more
to protect Sarah. Wondering what I could have said or done
differently. I also pondered finding a new group to hang out with!
My opinion is the other mother was annoyed at my discussion with her
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.
I guess I'm just posting this to see if other people out there have
run in to adults who are threatened by little kids allowed to speak
their minds and say what they want when they want it.
were walking along through a park my dd Sarah, age 6, sat down on a
bench and said, "Oh, I am so hungry," while holding her stomach.
Another mother was walking along beside us and said, "Oh, listen to
you, you drama queen."
Sarah asked, "What's a drama queen." I tried to explain it the best
I could--"like on TV or a show" and I acted it out a bit.
Sarah then became so angry she she stood in the path behind us and
began to sputter, "Well, I, but, but, but . . ."
The other mother looked back at Sarah and said, "I hope you're not
having an asthma attack."
I put my arm around Sarah and leaned down and she said, "But I don't
want her to call me a drama queen. I don't want to talk to her
anymore."
I said, "You are not a drama queen. I think she was joking. Now
let's
get back to the car where I have some snacks and drinks."
Sarah said, "I don't think it's funny. I don't like this joke."
The other mother then said, "Oh, I was just joking but I guess it
wasn't funny to you. I'm sorry. Can I call you Sleeping Beauty?"
Sarah said, "No, just call me Sarah."
The other mother then walked on ahead and I tried to explain labels
to Sarah. And how some grown-ups insult kids because they don't
want to hear what they have to say. And how it's OK to say you are
hungry when you are.
The funny part is this other mother had asked me about the Live and
Learn Conference and I had shown her Rue Kream's book which I had
brought for another friend to read. (Still working on Sandra's!)
This other mother opened the book to the part about doing things for
kids even when they are able to do for themselves. The other mother
and I got in to a discussion during which she said "kids have to do
for themselves or else they will always take the easy way out." I
disagreed and told her so. (BTW, her kids are 5, 3 and 1!)
This kept me awake last night as I felt that I should have done more
to protect Sarah. Wondering what I could have said or done
differently. I also pondered finding a new group to hang out with!
My opinion is the other mother was annoyed at my discussion with her
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.
I guess I'm just posting this to see if other people out there have
run in to adults who are threatened by little kids allowed to speak
their minds and say what they want when they want it.
Princess
Hello, this is my first post on this group but I have been lurking
for a while now.
Yes, I have experienced this with my children and other adults.
Some people can be so rude. I used to do more or less what you did
and try to explain to my kids that some people feel threatened by a
child who speaks their mind or says things how they see them.
But then one day, a woman spoke to my son and I must have been having
an off day. I blasted her, please do not address my child unless your
comment is a friendly and discussion based one. Kindly refer all
snide and vaguely rude comments about any of my children towards me
then I can comment back to you on the same level, adult to adult.
Naturally this went down like a lead balloon but as we were in public
and I, normally calm and placid, raised my voice in a firm manner,
this has not happened again and my children all said how proud they
felt that they mother had spoke up for them when they did not know
how to react nor understand what the other woman was going on about.
Hope this helps.
Helen J.
for a while now.
Yes, I have experienced this with my children and other adults.
Some people can be so rude. I used to do more or less what you did
and try to explain to my kids that some people feel threatened by a
child who speaks their mind or says things how they see them.
But then one day, a woman spoke to my son and I must have been having
an off day. I blasted her, please do not address my child unless your
comment is a friendly and discussion based one. Kindly refer all
snide and vaguely rude comments about any of my children towards me
then I can comment back to you on the same level, adult to adult.
Naturally this went down like a lead balloon but as we were in public
and I, normally calm and placid, raised my voice in a firm manner,
this has not happened again and my children all said how proud they
felt that they mother had spoke up for them when they did not know
how to react nor understand what the other woman was going on about.
Hope this helps.
Helen J.
On 13 Oct 2005, at 14:20, m59z85 wrote:
> We went for an outing yesterday with our homeschool group. As we
> were walking along through a park my dd Sarah, age 6, sat down on a
> bench and said, "Oh, I am so hungry," while holding her stomach.
>
> Another mother was walking along beside us and said, "Oh, listen to
> you, you drama queen."
>
> Sarah asked, "What's a drama queen." I tried to explain it the best
> I could--"like on TV or a show" and I acted it out a bit.
>
> Sarah then became so angry she she stood in the path behind us and
> began to sputter, "Well, I, but, but, but . . ."
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Renee Seawell
I think this was written for me. My daughter Jessica is very outspoken and loves to take care of
children younger than her (she's 10). We were at Church last night and one of the little 2 year
old boys was crying and she way trying to console him and this lady (who by the way is a parapro
at public school) said to her "Jessica, if you were in my class at school you would stay in the
timeout chair all of the time until you realized that the adults are in charge." THEN, after
Church she brought out a craft that the kids had made and one belonged to my daughter. I told her
that I thought Jessica was going to get it and she said "That's what happens when they know their
parents will do it for them."
This morning my little girl said "Mama, I hope she's not going to be working with the youth all of
the time." I had to agree. By the way (this is not a judgment but fact) this all comes from a
woman who has a daughter who by 21 has already joined the Marines and gotten out on a medical
dischargeand has been married and divorced. She has a son who had his license suspended for about
6 months.
I am totally not judging because I have three teenage sons and but by the Grace of God go I
however my boys have thus far been wonderful and guess what, THEY ARE ALL HOMESCHOOLED!
Guess I needed a rant. Sorry.
Renee in GA
__________________________________
Yahoo! Mail - PC Magazine Editors' Choice 2005
http://mail.yahoo.com
children younger than her (she's 10). We were at Church last night and one of the little 2 year
old boys was crying and she way trying to console him and this lady (who by the way is a parapro
at public school) said to her "Jessica, if you were in my class at school you would stay in the
timeout chair all of the time until you realized that the adults are in charge." THEN, after
Church she brought out a craft that the kids had made and one belonged to my daughter. I told her
that I thought Jessica was going to get it and she said "That's what happens when they know their
parents will do it for them."
This morning my little girl said "Mama, I hope she's not going to be working with the youth all of
the time." I had to agree. By the way (this is not a judgment but fact) this all comes from a
woman who has a daughter who by 21 has already joined the Marines and gotten out on a medical
dischargeand has been married and divorced. She has a son who had his license suspended for about
6 months.
I am totally not judging because I have three teenage sons and but by the Grace of God go I
however my boys have thus far been wonderful and guess what, THEY ARE ALL HOMESCHOOLED!
Guess I needed a rant. Sorry.
Renee in GA
__________________________________
Yahoo! Mail - PC Magazine Editors' Choice 2005
http://mail.yahoo.com
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/13/2005 9:06:25 AM Central Standard Time,
Rseawell@... writes:
"Jessica, if you were in my class at school you would stay in the
timeout chair all of the time until you realized that the adults are in
charge." THEN, after
Church she brought out a craft that the kids had made and one belonged to my
daughter. I told her
that I thought Jessica was going to get it and she said "That's what happens
when they know their
parents will do it for them."
~~~
"Nasty people like you is why I don't go to school."
"If you were my teacher, I'd get you fired."
"I don't know what the HELL I'm doing in your class at church, then."
lol.
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Rseawell@... writes:
"Jessica, if you were in my class at school you would stay in the
timeout chair all of the time until you realized that the adults are in
charge." THEN, after
Church she brought out a craft that the kids had made and one belonged to my
daughter. I told her
that I thought Jessica was going to get it and she said "That's what happens
when they know their
parents will do it for them."
~~~
"Nasty people like you is why I don't go to school."
"If you were my teacher, I'd get you fired."
"I don't know what the HELL I'm doing in your class at church, then."
lol.
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kim J. Flowers
This is kind of like the thread I posted a couple weeks ago about people
being rude to my kids when they talk to them. I basically just talk to my
kids about how some people just aren't nice, or whatever the situation might
be. I try to make them feel like it isn't their fault someone wasn't nice to
them. Which it isn't.
It is really hard for me to bite my tounge, and I do most of the time, but
sometimes it just slips out and I say something to the adult. I try not to
let my kids think I am picking a fight, but I want them to know that it
isn't ok for people to treat others (even kids) like that.
Kim Flowers - Wife to Nolan for 10 years Stay at Home Mama of 4 wonderful
boys
_____
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of m59z85
Sent: Thursday, October 13, 2005 8:21 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [UnschoolingDiscussion] Adults Insulting Children
We went for an outing yesterday with our homeschool group. As we
were walking along through a park my dd Sarah, age 6, sat down on a
bench and said, "Oh, I am so hungry," while holding her stomach.
Another mother was walking along beside us and said, "Oh, listen to
you, you drama queen."
Sarah asked, "What's a drama queen." I tried to explain it the best
I could--"like on TV or a show" and I acted it out a bit.
Sarah then became so angry she she stood in the path behind us and
began to sputter, "Well, I, but, but, but . . ."
The other mother looked back at Sarah and said, "I hope you're not
having an asthma attack."
I put my arm around Sarah and leaned down and she said, "But I don't
want her to call me a drama queen. I don't want to talk to her
anymore."
I said, "You are not a drama queen. I think she was joking. Now
let's
get back to the car where I have some snacks and drinks."
Sarah said, "I don't think it's funny. I don't like this joke."
The other mother then said, "Oh, I was just joking but I guess it
wasn't funny to you. I'm sorry. Can I call you Sleeping Beauty?"
Sarah said, "No, just call me Sarah."
The other mother then walked on ahead and I tried to explain labels
to Sarah. And how some grown-ups insult kids because they don't
want to hear what they have to say. And how it's OK to say you are
hungry when you are.
The funny part is this other mother had asked me about the Live and
Learn Conference and I had shown her Rue Kream's book which I had
brought for another friend to read. (Still working on Sandra's!)
This other mother opened the book to the part about doing things for
kids even when they are able to do for themselves. The other mother
and I got in to a discussion during which she said "kids have to do
for themselves or else they will always take the easy way out." I
disagreed and told her so. (BTW, her kids are 5, 3 and 1!)
This kept me awake last night as I felt that I should have done more
to protect Sarah. Wondering what I could have said or done
differently. I also pondered finding a new group to hang out with!
My opinion is the other mother was annoyed at my discussion with her
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.
I guess I'm just posting this to see if other people out there have
run in to adults who are threatened by little kids allowed to speak
their minds and say what they want when they want it.
"List Posting Policies" are provided in the files area of this group.
Visit the Unschooling website and message boards:
<http://www.unschooling.info>
_____
YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
* Visit your group "UnschoolingDiscussion
<http://groups.yahoo.com/group/UnschoolingDiscussion> " on the web.
* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscrib
e>
* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> .
_____
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
being rude to my kids when they talk to them. I basically just talk to my
kids about how some people just aren't nice, or whatever the situation might
be. I try to make them feel like it isn't their fault someone wasn't nice to
them. Which it isn't.
It is really hard for me to bite my tounge, and I do most of the time, but
sometimes it just slips out and I say something to the adult. I try not to
let my kids think I am picking a fight, but I want them to know that it
isn't ok for people to treat others (even kids) like that.
Kim Flowers - Wife to Nolan for 10 years Stay at Home Mama of 4 wonderful
boys
_____
From: [email protected]
[mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of m59z85
Sent: Thursday, October 13, 2005 8:21 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: [UnschoolingDiscussion] Adults Insulting Children
We went for an outing yesterday with our homeschool group. As we
were walking along through a park my dd Sarah, age 6, sat down on a
bench and said, "Oh, I am so hungry," while holding her stomach.
Another mother was walking along beside us and said, "Oh, listen to
you, you drama queen."
Sarah asked, "What's a drama queen." I tried to explain it the best
I could--"like on TV or a show" and I acted it out a bit.
Sarah then became so angry she she stood in the path behind us and
began to sputter, "Well, I, but, but, but . . ."
The other mother looked back at Sarah and said, "I hope you're not
having an asthma attack."
I put my arm around Sarah and leaned down and she said, "But I don't
want her to call me a drama queen. I don't want to talk to her
anymore."
I said, "You are not a drama queen. I think she was joking. Now
let's
get back to the car where I have some snacks and drinks."
Sarah said, "I don't think it's funny. I don't like this joke."
The other mother then said, "Oh, I was just joking but I guess it
wasn't funny to you. I'm sorry. Can I call you Sleeping Beauty?"
Sarah said, "No, just call me Sarah."
The other mother then walked on ahead and I tried to explain labels
to Sarah. And how some grown-ups insult kids because they don't
want to hear what they have to say. And how it's OK to say you are
hungry when you are.
The funny part is this other mother had asked me about the Live and
Learn Conference and I had shown her Rue Kream's book which I had
brought for another friend to read. (Still working on Sandra's!)
This other mother opened the book to the part about doing things for
kids even when they are able to do for themselves. The other mother
and I got in to a discussion during which she said "kids have to do
for themselves or else they will always take the easy way out." I
disagreed and told her so. (BTW, her kids are 5, 3 and 1!)
This kept me awake last night as I felt that I should have done more
to protect Sarah. Wondering what I could have said or done
differently. I also pondered finding a new group to hang out with!
My opinion is the other mother was annoyed at my discussion with her
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.
I guess I'm just posting this to see if other people out there have
run in to adults who are threatened by little kids allowed to speak
their minds and say what they want when they want it.
"List Posting Policies" are provided in the files area of this group.
Visit the Unschooling website and message boards:
<http://www.unschooling.info>
_____
YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
* Visit your group "UnschoolingDiscussion
<http://groups.yahoo.com/group/UnschoolingDiscussion> " on the web.
* To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[email protected]
<mailto:[email protected]?subject=Unsubscrib
e>
* Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service
<http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/> .
_____
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
> -=-Naturally this went down like a lead balloon but as we were in publicI guess the word got around!! <g>
> and I, normally calm and placid, raised my voice in a firm manner,
> this has not happened again-=-
>
That adult-to-adult thing is what was missing in my "why does this bug me?"
thoughts. You're right! The same people who think it's okay to light into a
kid like that would probably NOT think it was even NEARLY fine for a kid to
respond in kind.
There is, though, in England, a thing we don't have here (and maybe it's
fading there, and maybe we have it here but it just doesn't have a name).
"Snipping." I was warned the first time I visited that I really needed to queue
at the bus stop, and not lounge around like Americans do, or the older women
would "snip" me. They don't limit it to kids, but if there's an expectation
that someone will say "Queue up" or "Stop running" to adults, the kids must
expect it.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Princess
HI Sandra
adult to adult is and has worked out best. If it were another kid
that was rude, then the kids would have just responded in their own way.
My son had to give evidence one day about a very rude adult here and
when the police officer asked him how he felt he said that he was
shocked and surprised as he did not know that adults spoke to kids
like that.
Good point!
Helen J.
adult to adult is and has worked out best. If it were another kid
that was rude, then the kids would have just responded in their own way.
My son had to give evidence one day about a very rude adult here and
when the police officer asked him how he felt he said that he was
shocked and surprised as he did not know that adults spoke to kids
like that.
Good point!
Helen J.
On 13 Oct 2005, at 16:25, SandraDodd@... wrote:
>
>
> > -=-Naturally this went down like a lead balloon but as we were in
> public
> > and I, normally calm and placid, raised my voice in a firm manner,
> > this has not happened again-=-
> >
>
> I guess the word got around!! <g>
>
> That adult-to-adult thing is what was missing in my "why does this
> bug me?"
> thoughts. You're right! The same people who think it's okay to
> light into a
> kid like that would probably NOT think it was even NEARLY fine for
> a kid to
> respond in kind.
>
> There is, though, in England, a thing we don't have here (and maybe
> it's
> fading there, and maybe we have it here but it just doesn't have a
> name).
> "Snipping." I was warned the first time I visited that I really
> needed to queue
> at the bus stop, and not lounge around like Americans do, or the
> older women
> would "snip" me. They don't limit it to kids, but if there's an
> expectation
> that someone will say "Queue up" or "Stop running" to adults, the
> kids must
> expect it.
>
> Sandra
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
> "List Posting Policies" are provided in the files area of this group.
>
> Visit the Unschooling website and message boards: <http://
> www.unschooling.info>
>
>
> YAHOO! GROUPS LINKS
>
> Visit your group "UnschoolingDiscussion" on the web.
>
> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
> [email protected]
>
> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Betsy Hill
** My opinion is the other mother was annoyed at my discussion with her
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.**
I think that sounds like an accurate assessment. Perhaps the other mom
wanted to be able to talk more, but used a bullying approach to get what
she wanted.
Betsy
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.**
I think that sounds like an accurate assessment. Perhaps the other mom
wanted to be able to talk more, but used a bullying approach to get what
she wanted.
Betsy
[email protected]
When we first moved to Albuquerque a couple of months ago, I bravely took
the kids to a homeschool park day after learning that there were kids close to
Logan's age (12). I say bravely because going into new situations for me is a
bit like going to get a root canal..only worse. We arrived and the kids
started playing Frisbee and a group of mom's sitting in a circle on the grass
were very welcoming.
Brenna (16) and Logan joined in a game they were playing and my perception
was that all was well...a nice fall day...kids playing. Apparently, two of
the girls were having a problem not following the "tag" rules. It seemed to
me, however, that the kids were working it out.
Suddenly, one of the mom's stood and marched over to a group of the kids
(Logan was in the group) and just started berating two girls in a voice that
could be heard all over the park.
She said very mean things and used words like "bitching" and I saw Logan
just getting smaller and smaller as he tried to edge away. I don't know if
either of the girls were her daughter. She went on and on and then proudly came
back to the circle and plopped down as if "her job was done."
It's not the first time I had seen a parent behave like this but I think it
might have been for Logan. I was surprised as in "I can't believe I just saw
that kind of way." He was shocked and sad and ready to leave. Brenna was
appalled and angry that anyone would speak to kids that way.
I didn't know any of them and had been brave enough to get there but not
brave enough to intervene. We left quietly and neither of the kids have any
interest in ever going back.
It was sad because we had hoped it would be a good opportunity to meet some
other people.. Mostly sad, though, because those other kids didn't seem at
all surprised by this women's outburst. And even sadder, that the other mom's
didn't even stop their conversations or seem to notice.
Gail
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
the kids to a homeschool park day after learning that there were kids close to
Logan's age (12). I say bravely because going into new situations for me is a
bit like going to get a root canal..only worse. We arrived and the kids
started playing Frisbee and a group of mom's sitting in a circle on the grass
were very welcoming.
Brenna (16) and Logan joined in a game they were playing and my perception
was that all was well...a nice fall day...kids playing. Apparently, two of
the girls were having a problem not following the "tag" rules. It seemed to
me, however, that the kids were working it out.
Suddenly, one of the mom's stood and marched over to a group of the kids
(Logan was in the group) and just started berating two girls in a voice that
could be heard all over the park.
She said very mean things and used words like "bitching" and I saw Logan
just getting smaller and smaller as he tried to edge away. I don't know if
either of the girls were her daughter. She went on and on and then proudly came
back to the circle and plopped down as if "her job was done."
It's not the first time I had seen a parent behave like this but I think it
might have been for Logan. I was surprised as in "I can't believe I just saw
that kind of way." He was shocked and sad and ready to leave. Brenna was
appalled and angry that anyone would speak to kids that way.
I didn't know any of them and had been brave enough to get there but not
brave enough to intervene. We left quietly and neither of the kids have any
interest in ever going back.
It was sad because we had hoped it would be a good opportunity to meet some
other people.. Mostly sad, though, because those other kids didn't seem at
all surprised by this women's outburst. And even sadder, that the other mom's
didn't even stop their conversations or seem to notice.
Gail
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
NANCY OWENS
m59z85 <maggioncalda@...> wrote:
My opinion is the other mother was annoyed at my discussion with her
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.
I guess I'm just posting this to see if other people out there have
run in to adults who are threatened by little kids allowed to speak
their minds and say what they want when they want it.
child, clutching stomach: 'I'm so hungry!'
mom, hands child snack of choice
other mom, with venom: 'My! Aren't you the little drama queen?'
child, takes bite of snack, thinks for a moment, looks other mom up and down, says: 'Drama queen?' pause 'Oh! I'm sorry did my hunger bring up food issues for you?' child (with lots of *tude*) turns on heel, flips hair, and walks away.
~Nancy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
My opinion is the other mother was annoyed at my discussion with her
and also with Sarah, who had been talking nonstop to all of the
adults in the group during our walk. I think this other mother
meant to put Sarah "in her place." I told Sarah adults say things
like this to make kids be quiet and feel bad about asking for things.
I guess I'm just posting this to see if other people out there have
run in to adults who are threatened by little kids allowed to speak
their minds and say what they want when they want it.
child, clutching stomach: 'I'm so hungry!'
mom, hands child snack of choice
other mom, with venom: 'My! Aren't you the little drama queen?'
child, takes bite of snack, thinks for a moment, looks other mom up and down, says: 'Drama queen?' pause 'Oh! I'm sorry did my hunger bring up food issues for you?' child (with lots of *tude*) turns on heel, flips hair, and walks away.
~Nancy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
aplan4life
Wow, must be something in the water! Happened to me twice today. We
went to NAS Pensacola's FT. Barrancas with some friends. It wasn't
9:30 a.m. yet and we were the ONLY ONES THERE. Anyway, while we
waited for the place to "officially" open my friends son asked if he
could ride the scooter in the parking lot. This lady comes marching
out with a pamphlet saying, "Welcome" with the most see through,
clinched teeth smile and says, "Um, you need to go ahead and put that
scooter up, we have ALOT of elderly people that visit here and we do
not want anyone to get hurt." There are no "No scooter/skateboard"
signs at this place and it was the parking spot not the sidewalk and
no one else was there. Then my dd was sitting in the hatch part of
our car eating a sandwhich and she looks at Brooke and then me and
says, "You need to eat that at the picnic tables, you cannot take food
into the Fort area." WTH?!? She was totally mean, a very grumpy
person and not just disrespectful to the kids but us too. I'm not
used to people treating me this way, so I just bit my tongue, so did
my friend.
Just a few minutes at the ago at the Winn Dixie, I was in the check
out line. I had grabbed one of those little $1.49 dollar magazines.
Zak asked if I had grabbed "People Magazine" to which I told him, "No,
I'm not sure what it is just grabbed it to read." Then this bitter
cashier pipes in and says, "Your mom has to have something to read,
she can't be reading baby books to you all the time. She's probably
sick of reading baby books. You guys should be reading to your mom."
I was pissed. I said, "Um, my children read to me all the time and
they read very well."
Why do people act like this? I just totally do not understand why
people are so hateful towards kids. Who knows, maybe the people at
the park had had their fill of field trip students or something but
the woman at the grocery store didn't know what the hell she was
talking about.
BTW...Is the Live and Learn Conference in Pensacola next year? Maybe I
misread it being in NM but at SandraDodd.com it says Pensacola. I
want so badly to meet you all!
~Sandy Winn
went to NAS Pensacola's FT. Barrancas with some friends. It wasn't
9:30 a.m. yet and we were the ONLY ONES THERE. Anyway, while we
waited for the place to "officially" open my friends son asked if he
could ride the scooter in the parking lot. This lady comes marching
out with a pamphlet saying, "Welcome" with the most see through,
clinched teeth smile and says, "Um, you need to go ahead and put that
scooter up, we have ALOT of elderly people that visit here and we do
not want anyone to get hurt." There are no "No scooter/skateboard"
signs at this place and it was the parking spot not the sidewalk and
no one else was there. Then my dd was sitting in the hatch part of
our car eating a sandwhich and she looks at Brooke and then me and
says, "You need to eat that at the picnic tables, you cannot take food
into the Fort area." WTH?!? She was totally mean, a very grumpy
person and not just disrespectful to the kids but us too. I'm not
used to people treating me this way, so I just bit my tongue, so did
my friend.
Just a few minutes at the ago at the Winn Dixie, I was in the check
out line. I had grabbed one of those little $1.49 dollar magazines.
Zak asked if I had grabbed "People Magazine" to which I told him, "No,
I'm not sure what it is just grabbed it to read." Then this bitter
cashier pipes in and says, "Your mom has to have something to read,
she can't be reading baby books to you all the time. She's probably
sick of reading baby books. You guys should be reading to your mom."
I was pissed. I said, "Um, my children read to me all the time and
they read very well."
Why do people act like this? I just totally do not understand why
people are so hateful towards kids. Who knows, maybe the people at
the park had had their fill of field trip students or something but
the woman at the grocery store didn't know what the hell she was
talking about.
BTW...Is the Live and Learn Conference in Pensacola next year? Maybe I
misread it being in NM but at SandraDodd.com it says Pensacola. I
want so badly to meet you all!
~Sandy Winn
[email protected]
> -=-BTW...Is the Live and Learn Conference in Pensacola next year? Maybe IDOH!
> misread it being in NM but at SandraDodd.com it says Pensacola. I
> want so badly to meet you all!-=-
>
I am SO SORRY.
I've known for months Pensacola was out. Hurricanes, lack of standing
hotels, Ren moving to Tennessee...
Albuquerque in 2006.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
aplan4life
> DOH!standing
>
> I am SO SORRY.
> I've known for months Pensacola was out. Hurricanes, lack of
> hotels, Ren moving to Tennessee...:-( Well, I will try my darndest to save in order to get there.
>
> Albuquerque in 2006.
>
> Sandra
We've never been to that part of the country, what a perfect place to
take a vacation. However, if we can't, maybe I'll be come such a
great and seasoned unschooler by then that I can help with a
conference in Pensacola. :-)
Heartbroken Still....Sandy
m59z85
I love you people and your wonderful replies.
Thanks for all of the sharing and support. I feel better just
reading them all and I am very interested in the adult-to-adult
interaction. I should have turned this event in to that and will
try to next time. It sounds like a lot of people have experienced
similar times with their children.
Food Issues! I'll bet that was it--I never thought of it! (BTW,
this same woman told me on another occasion that if her kids don't
finish their dinner they get it for breakfast the next morning!
Yuck! If mine don't finish their dinner I happily do it for them--
wait, that's another issue!)
Thanks gang,
Linda Maggioncalda
hunger bring up food issues for you?' child (with lots of *tude*)
turns on heel, flips hair, and walks away.
Thanks for all of the sharing and support. I feel better just
reading them all and I am very interested in the adult-to-adult
interaction. I should have turned this event in to that and will
try to next time. It sounds like a lot of people have experienced
similar times with their children.
Food Issues! I'll bet that was it--I never thought of it! (BTW,
this same woman told me on another occasion that if her kids don't
finish their dinner they get it for breakfast the next morning!
Yuck! If mine don't finish their dinner I happily do it for them--
wait, that's another issue!)
Thanks gang,
Linda Maggioncalda
> child, clutching stomach: 'I'm so hungry!'up and down, says: 'Drama queen?' pause 'Oh! I'm sorry did my
>
> mom, hands child snack of choice
>
> other mom, with venom: 'My! Aren't you the little drama queen?'
>
> child, takes bite of snack, thinks for a moment, looks other mom
hunger bring up food issues for you?' child (with lots of *tude*)
turns on heel, flips hair, and walks away.
>
>
>
> ~Nancy
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Cally Brown
Sensitive souls should not read on....
husband - whatever that is!). He insisted on everyone eating what was
put in front of them. My parents always had me sit between them so they
could eat the food I didn't want (one up for my parents!). But his
family... One time we were staying at their bach (holiday home) and my
cousin was sent to her room for 3 days, allowed out only to the toilet
and to sit at the table each day until she ate the dinner she didn't
want to eat - same plate of food served up at each mealtime. (She lasted
that long because she was determined - and because her mother and mine
sneaked food to her). One time at home apparently, he made her eat
porrige, which she hated, and when she vomited it up he made her...
well, let's not even put it into words.
He was an out and out bully and abusive parent. These days he wouldn't
get away with it but we are talking 40 - 50 years ago.
He had 7 children.
At his funeral the eldest son got up and told what a bastard his father
was. He said how glad he was that his father had lasted for two weeks
after the massive stroke that killed him, unable to move or talk,
because it had given the now adult kids the chance to tell him all the
stuff they had bottled up all those years, to tell him what a horrible
person he had been.
His widow stood up, beaming with joy, and told how one of her daughters
had given her and her brother airline tickets to go visit family in
Canada and England now her husband was dead - and talked about how she
couldn't wait, and what fun life was going to be now.
I haven't been a perfect parent, I've made a lot of mistakes - but I
KNOW my kids won't be saying that sort of stuff at my funeral!
What a sad, sad man. What a sad, sad death.
We need to protect our kids to the best of our ability - my parents did
what they could to the best of their ability at that time in history. I
know I have done better. But I think it doesn't do us any harm to think
about the sad lives these sort of people live, and once we are done with
protecting ourselves and our precious children, feel compassion for
people whose lives are so sad and bitter and twisted and, well, SAD.
Cally
PS. Personally I got over my fear of this man when I was about 19. He
came to dinner, and as I was helping my mother serve up, he said, "No
mushrooms for me thanks, I really don't like mushrooms." I paused a
moment, shocked. Then I put a huge spoonful of mushrooms on his plate,
handed it to him and said, "In this house, you eat what's put in front
of you." (Exactly how he used to say it to us.) There was a stunned
silence. My parents, and his wife froze, terrified. We waited - then R
picked up his knife and fork and ate. And I was never frightened of him
again. One of the few times my parents expressed pride in anything I did!
> Food Issues! I'll bet that was it--I never thought of it! (BTW,I'm 54. As a child I was terrified of a relation (my father's cousin's
> this same woman told me on another occasion that if her kids don't
> finish their dinner they get it for breakfast the next morning!
> Yuck!
husband - whatever that is!). He insisted on everyone eating what was
put in front of them. My parents always had me sit between them so they
could eat the food I didn't want (one up for my parents!). But his
family... One time we were staying at their bach (holiday home) and my
cousin was sent to her room for 3 days, allowed out only to the toilet
and to sit at the table each day until she ate the dinner she didn't
want to eat - same plate of food served up at each mealtime. (She lasted
that long because she was determined - and because her mother and mine
sneaked food to her). One time at home apparently, he made her eat
porrige, which she hated, and when she vomited it up he made her...
well, let's not even put it into words.
He was an out and out bully and abusive parent. These days he wouldn't
get away with it but we are talking 40 - 50 years ago.
He had 7 children.
At his funeral the eldest son got up and told what a bastard his father
was. He said how glad he was that his father had lasted for two weeks
after the massive stroke that killed him, unable to move or talk,
because it had given the now adult kids the chance to tell him all the
stuff they had bottled up all those years, to tell him what a horrible
person he had been.
His widow stood up, beaming with joy, and told how one of her daughters
had given her and her brother airline tickets to go visit family in
Canada and England now her husband was dead - and talked about how she
couldn't wait, and what fun life was going to be now.
I haven't been a perfect parent, I've made a lot of mistakes - but I
KNOW my kids won't be saying that sort of stuff at my funeral!
What a sad, sad man. What a sad, sad death.
We need to protect our kids to the best of our ability - my parents did
what they could to the best of their ability at that time in history. I
know I have done better. But I think it doesn't do us any harm to think
about the sad lives these sort of people live, and once we are done with
protecting ourselves and our precious children, feel compassion for
people whose lives are so sad and bitter and twisted and, well, SAD.
Cally
PS. Personally I got over my fear of this man when I was about 19. He
came to dinner, and as I was helping my mother serve up, he said, "No
mushrooms for me thanks, I really don't like mushrooms." I paused a
moment, shocked. Then I put a huge spoonful of mushrooms on his plate,
handed it to him and said, "In this house, you eat what's put in front
of you." (Exactly how he used to say it to us.) There was a stunned
silence. My parents, and his wife froze, terrified. We waited - then R
picked up his knife and fork and ate. And I was never frightened of him
again. One of the few times my parents expressed pride in anything I did!
Denise Thomas
--- NANCY OWENS <nancy-owens@...> wrote:
Nonviolent Communication, something like:
"when I hear you calling me a drama queen I fell sad.
I need to feel safe knowing I won't get insulted by
the people we chose to spend time with, would you be
willing to find a different way to express your
feelings about my telling my Mom that I am hungry?"
I know it sounds a little bit contrived, but with
practice, it can be made to sound better and can get
easier to say. I'd love to see us teach our children
to stop the meaness, and open a dialogue. What if we
taught them to be examples to people like this woman?
I am just starting to learn about NVC, so I am by no
means an expert, but it has helped us a great deal
already, so I thought I'd bring it up. I highly
recommend Marshal Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication
Videos (I got them at the library.)
Denise
Denise
Please visit Symphony Sam, an exciting upcoming TV show for children about Classical Music that we are creating:
http://www.hotmusic.org/SymphonySam
__________________________________
Yahoo! Music Unlimited
Access over 1 million songs. Try it free.
http://music.yahoo.com/unlimited/
> child, takes bite of snack, thinks for a moment,Or, the child could say, if they had learned
> looks other mom up and down, says: 'Drama queen?'
> pause 'Oh! I'm sorry did my hunger bring up food
> issues for you?' child (with lots of *tude*) turns
> on heel, flips hair, and walks away.
Nonviolent Communication, something like:
"when I hear you calling me a drama queen I fell sad.
I need to feel safe knowing I won't get insulted by
the people we chose to spend time with, would you be
willing to find a different way to express your
feelings about my telling my Mom that I am hungry?"
I know it sounds a little bit contrived, but with
practice, it can be made to sound better and can get
easier to say. I'd love to see us teach our children
to stop the meaness, and open a dialogue. What if we
taught them to be examples to people like this woman?
I am just starting to learn about NVC, so I am by no
means an expert, but it has helped us a great deal
already, so I thought I'd bring it up. I highly
recommend Marshal Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication
Videos (I got them at the library.)
Denise
Denise
Please visit Symphony Sam, an exciting upcoming TV show for children about Classical Music that we are creating:
http://www.hotmusic.org/SymphonySam
__________________________________
Yahoo! Music Unlimited
Access over 1 million songs. Try it free.
http://music.yahoo.com/unlimited/
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/13/05 5:34:06 PM, mjcmbrwn@... writes:
It's kind of sad they waited that long, but maybe they were still afraid of
him.
-=-What a sad, sad man. What a sad, sad death.-=-
As sad as the stories are, I'm afraid to even think of what had been done to
him when HE was little to make him so mean.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> -=-At his funeral the eldest son got up and told what a bastard his fatherWOW.
> was. He said how glad he was that his father had lasted for two weeks
> after the massive stroke that killed him, unable to move or talk,
> because it had given the now adult kids the chance to tell him all the
> stuff they had bottled up all those years, to tell him what a horrible
> person he had been.-=-
>
It's kind of sad they waited that long, but maybe they were still afraid of
him.
-=-What a sad, sad man. What a sad, sad death.-=-
As sad as the stories are, I'm afraid to even think of what had been done to
him when HE was little to make him so mean.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
nellebelle
>>>>>>>>>>As sad as the stories are, I'm afraid to even think of what had been done tohim when HE was little to make him so mean>>>>>>>>>>>>
We just finished two months of Lisa being in the cast of a play with our local children's theater. I couldn't believe some of the condescending things that were said to children AND adults during the course of putting it on! Overall, though, I guess it was worth it. Lisa LOVED the expericence and managed not to be a direct target of any of the adults running the show. In a cast of 63 (which included half a dozen adults), 13 were homeschooled.
I've been thinking about something that I heard recently. It may have been Joyce, I'm not sure and I may not have the exact quote.
The sentiment was, What if the only thing they learned was, Can I help you with that?
What a neat idea! Of course it would be impossible for a child to learn nothing else. But, what if? What if millions of children grew up with the idea "Can I help you with that?"
Too often well-meaning adults believe that children benefit when made to do things on their own.
Or they raise children with the idea that "someday you'll have to do X so you may as well get used to it now". I've thought of a response for the next time I hear that.
"Yes, someday they will need to have sex, so let's have them practice it while they are children!"
Mary Ellen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/13/05 6:56:56 PM, nellebelle@... writes:
broken leg later?"
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> -=-Or they raise children with the idea that "someday you'll have to do XMy analogy has been "would breaking his finger now prepare him for a possible
> so you may as well get used to it now". I've thought of a response for the
> next time I hear that.
>
> -=-"Yes, someday they will need to have sex, so let's have them practice it
> while they are children!"
>
>
broken leg later?"
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Cally Brown
>yeah, that's what I feel about him too. And that's why I hope I can
> As sad as the stories are, I'm afraid to even think of what had been
> done to
> him when HE was little to make him so mean.
always feel some compassion for twisted bitter people - once I have
protected me and mine.
Cally
Cally Brown
>or sooner or later he'll come in contact with alcohol, so why not put it
> > -=-"Yes, someday they will need to have sex, so let's have them
> practice it
> > while they are children!"
> >
> >
> My analogy has been "would breaking his finger now prepare him for a
> possible
> broken leg later?"
in a bottle and give him while he's a baby so he can get adjusted to it
early?
Cally
katherand2003
I agree that people sometimes just aren't appropriate in their
behavior to children. Read Jan Hunt's article on Child Advocacy
(http://www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/intervention1.html). Children
need special protection because they are learning and need a safe
place to do that, not to be punished for getting things wrong and
certainly not for being themselves though a child! I like the idea
Jan Hunt presents because all people need to be treated well whether
adult or not. I would love to be able to think on my feet and
practice Hunt's suggestion but I have to admit I'm very uncomfortable
in situations where I feel the need to advocate for children. It's
too easy for me to feel anger above the need(s) of others, and I see
this as my own immaturity at work. :(
Kathe, in need of maturity, and all I seem to get is older
--- In [email protected], "Kim J. Flowers"
<kim@t...> wrote:
behavior to children. Read Jan Hunt's article on Child Advocacy
(http://www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/intervention1.html). Children
need special protection because they are learning and need a safe
place to do that, not to be punished for getting things wrong and
certainly not for being themselves though a child! I like the idea
Jan Hunt presents because all people need to be treated well whether
adult or not. I would love to be able to think on my feet and
practice Hunt's suggestion but I have to admit I'm very uncomfortable
in situations where I feel the need to advocate for children. It's
too easy for me to feel anger above the need(s) of others, and I see
this as my own immaturity at work. :(
Kathe, in need of maturity, and all I seem to get is older
--- In [email protected], "Kim J. Flowers"
<kim@t...> wrote:
>to my
> This is kind of like the thread I posted a couple weeks ago about people
> being rude to my kids when they talk to them. I basically just talk
> kids about how some people just aren't nice, or whatever thesituation might
> be. I try to make them feel like it isn't their fault someone wasn'tnice to
> them. Which it isn't.time, but
>
> It is really hard for me to bite my tounge, and I do most of the
> sometimes it just slips out and I say something to the adult. I trynot to
> let my kids think I am picking a fight, but I want them to know that itwonderful
> isn't ok for people to treat others (even kids) like that.
>
> Kim Flowers - Wife to Nolan for 10 years Stay at Home Mama of 4
> boys
>
>
katherand2003
And it works whether you show anger or not. Not too long ago,
relatives were carrying on about ds nursing still (26 months old) and
asking him if he were a "baby" and I said "Don't talk to Karl about
nursing. That's our business." I said it lightly but they knocked it
off because they knew I meant it.
Kathe
--- In [email protected], Princess
<neat_and_pretty@y...> wrote:
relatives were carrying on about ds nursing still (26 months old) and
asking him if he were a "baby" and I said "Don't talk to Karl about
nursing. That's our business." I said it lightly but they knocked it
off because they knew I meant it.
Kathe
--- In [email protected], Princess
<neat_and_pretty@y...> wrote:
>
> But then one day, a woman spoke to my son and I must have been having
> an off day. I blasted her, please do not address my child unless your
> comment is a friendly and discussion based one. Kindly refer all
> snide and vaguely rude comments about any of my children towards me
> then I can comment back to you on the same level, adult to adult.
>
> Naturally this went down like a lead balloon but as we were in public
> and I, normally calm and placid, raised my voice in a firm manner,
> this has not happened again and my children all said how proud they
> felt that they mother had spoke up for them when they did not know
> how to react nor understand what the other woman was going on about.
>
> Hope this helps.
>
> Helen J.
elainegh8
Hi
I've not heard the term snipping and I live in England, I'm
guessing it's probably a regional variation of the language. I have
heard the term sniping but that's not quite the same thing.
Have to say though that in our part of the country (Midlands) if
someone tries to jump in in front of a queue it is considered
extremely bad manners, I mean really really really Baaaad manners.
Everyone waits their turn, this is across the board.
It's not universal but for some people (me included) it's still
seen as good manners to let an elderly or disabled person get on to
a bus before you. Also if I'm queuing at the checkout in a
supermarket and I have a trolley full and someone is behind and has
only a couple of items I'd let them go before me. Seems fairly
common practice. I still say thank you to the bus driver when I get
off, I am not the only one that does this, it's fairly common.
If someone gets on the bus with a baby,or is pregant or elderly or
disabled then I'd give up my seat to let them sit down. This is a
disappearing thing.
I don't think many of these manners exist in London at all. Often it
seems that people visiting London assume the rest of the UK is like
London. It's not at all like London and people, manners and language
can be very very different even if it's two towns 20 miles away from
each other.
Have to say that if someone tried to queue jump in front of me I
would probably say something to them about it. If you don't stand
in the queue then you have to go last.
BWs Elaine
I've not heard the term snipping and I live in England, I'm
guessing it's probably a regional variation of the language. I have
heard the term sniping but that's not quite the same thing.
Have to say though that in our part of the country (Midlands) if
someone tries to jump in in front of a queue it is considered
extremely bad manners, I mean really really really Baaaad manners.
Everyone waits their turn, this is across the board.
It's not universal but for some people (me included) it's still
seen as good manners to let an elderly or disabled person get on to
a bus before you. Also if I'm queuing at the checkout in a
supermarket and I have a trolley full and someone is behind and has
only a couple of items I'd let them go before me. Seems fairly
common practice. I still say thank you to the bus driver when I get
off, I am not the only one that does this, it's fairly common.
If someone gets on the bus with a baby,or is pregant or elderly or
disabled then I'd give up my seat to let them sit down. This is a
disappearing thing.
I don't think many of these manners exist in London at all. Often it
seems that people visiting London assume the rest of the UK is like
London. It's not at all like London and people, manners and language
can be very very different even if it's two towns 20 miles away from
each other.
Have to say that if someone tried to queue jump in front of me I
would probably say something to them about it. If you don't stand
in the queue then you have to go last.
BWs Elaine
> There is, though, in England, a thing we don't have here (andmaybe it's
> fading there, and maybe we have it here but it just doesn't have aname).
> "Snipping." I was warned the first time I visited that I reallyneeded to queue
> at the bus stop, and not lounge around like Americans do, or theolder women
> would "snip" me. They don't limit it to kids, but if there's anexpectation
> that someone will say "Queue up" or "Stop running" to adults, thekids must
> expect it.]
>
> Sandra
>
Princess
Hi Elaine
In Tyne & Wear, just about six miles outside of Newcastle we live.
The manners are disgusting. Everyone thinks that our children are so
well mannered as they do all the things that you do. Always say
please, thank you etc. Let people go in front of them in the
supermarket queue if they are queuing with lots of things in a
trolley and the person behind has one or two things.
When we first moved here from London, it was shocking. Kids spitting
everywhere you look, even the adult males do it. We find this foul.
Little kids as young as eight smoke and you see ten year olds with
cans of beer while their mothers sit tanning themselves or smoking pot.
The kids get their rudeness around here and vocabulary from the
mothers. We have heard the way that some mothers speak to kids
outside and it is highly insulting even swear words are used. The
way that they speak to each other leaves a lot to be desired too.
Having said all that though, it seems to be in patches around the
North East that we have found this. On the whole the people are
genuine and friendly. But then its always the small groups like the
ones described above from where we live that spoil the atmosphere for
everyone else.
I would not accept adults speaking to my children in an insulting or
degrading tone of voice. I think people know that where we live now
and keep their distance.
Helen J.
In Tyne & Wear, just about six miles outside of Newcastle we live.
The manners are disgusting. Everyone thinks that our children are so
well mannered as they do all the things that you do. Always say
please, thank you etc. Let people go in front of them in the
supermarket queue if they are queuing with lots of things in a
trolley and the person behind has one or two things.
When we first moved here from London, it was shocking. Kids spitting
everywhere you look, even the adult males do it. We find this foul.
Little kids as young as eight smoke and you see ten year olds with
cans of beer while their mothers sit tanning themselves or smoking pot.
The kids get their rudeness around here and vocabulary from the
mothers. We have heard the way that some mothers speak to kids
outside and it is highly insulting even swear words are used. The
way that they speak to each other leaves a lot to be desired too.
Having said all that though, it seems to be in patches around the
North East that we have found this. On the whole the people are
genuine and friendly. But then its always the small groups like the
ones described above from where we live that spoil the atmosphere for
everyone else.
I would not accept adults speaking to my children in an insulting or
degrading tone of voice. I think people know that where we live now
and keep their distance.
Helen J.
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/14/05 7:02:48 AM, katherand2003@... writes:
"BACK OFF" isn't unreasonable. I like questions, though. "Do you do this
with everyone, or just children?" is a good one. I don't need an answer, but
they might need to take the question home and sleep with it.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> -=-I have to admit I'm very uncomfortableDepending how mean the other people have been to our kids, though, sometimes
> in situations where I feel the need to advocate for children. It's
> too easy for me to feel anger above the need(s) of others, and I see
> this as my own immaturity at work. :(
>
> -=-
"BACK OFF" isn't unreasonable. I like questions, though. "Do you do this
with everyone, or just children?" is a good one. I don't need an answer, but
they might need to take the question home and sleep with it.
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 10/14/05 9:37:50 AM, elainegh8@... writes:
I got in that line and stayed very still.<g>
-=-
Have to say though that in our part of the country (Midlands) if
someone tries to jump in in front of a queue it is considered
extremely bad manners, I mean really really really Baaaad manners.-=-
Here too, only we're less likely to queue. At a bus stop in Albuquerque,
some people will sit on the bench, some will stand around, some will lean on
poles or be reading window signs. When the bus is in view some might line up
but most won't. Generally, a person will make eye contact with those who were
there before he was, offering for them to go on ahead of him. So it's not
that we don't know what the order of arrival is, it's that it's not that
pressing. People with bags or impediments will probably be allowed on first or
helped out. Sometimes the person who got there first will hang back and get on
last, but maybe because he just doesn't like crowds, or is getting off soon.
I don't know that it's that way everywhere in the country.
At the video store by my house, if there aren't many people there, we make
one line for all the windows. When it's very crowded, one line would keep
people from moving around the store, so several lines might form, but not necessari
ly one per cash register. And if I'm in the front of my line and I know the
person at the front of the other line was there before I was, I might gesture
for her to go ahead when it's "my turn."
-=-It's not universal but for some people (me included) it's still
seen as good manners to let an elderly or disabled person get on to
a bus before you. Also if I'm queuing at the checkout in a
supermarket and I have a trolley full and someone is behind and has
only a couple of items I'd let them go before me. Seems fairly
common practice.-=-
Same here, "here" being New Mexico.
-=- I still say thank you to the bus driver when I get
off, I am not the only one that does this, it's fairly common.-=-
Lots of people say something. "Thank you" or "Thanks" or "See ya!" or "Have
a good day."
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> I've not heard the term snipping and I live in England, I'mI was in Cambridge, 1979 or so.
> guessing it's probably a regional variation of the language.
>
I got in that line and stayed very still.<g>
-=-
Have to say though that in our part of the country (Midlands) if
someone tries to jump in in front of a queue it is considered
extremely bad manners, I mean really really really Baaaad manners.-=-
Here too, only we're less likely to queue. At a bus stop in Albuquerque,
some people will sit on the bench, some will stand around, some will lean on
poles or be reading window signs. When the bus is in view some might line up
but most won't. Generally, a person will make eye contact with those who were
there before he was, offering for them to go on ahead of him. So it's not
that we don't know what the order of arrival is, it's that it's not that
pressing. People with bags or impediments will probably be allowed on first or
helped out. Sometimes the person who got there first will hang back and get on
last, but maybe because he just doesn't like crowds, or is getting off soon.
I don't know that it's that way everywhere in the country.
At the video store by my house, if there aren't many people there, we make
one line for all the windows. When it's very crowded, one line would keep
people from moving around the store, so several lines might form, but not necessari
ly one per cash register. And if I'm in the front of my line and I know the
person at the front of the other line was there before I was, I might gesture
for her to go ahead when it's "my turn."
-=-It's not universal but for some people (me included) it's still
seen as good manners to let an elderly or disabled person get on to
a bus before you. Also if I'm queuing at the checkout in a
supermarket and I have a trolley full and someone is behind and has
only a couple of items I'd let them go before me. Seems fairly
common practice.-=-
Same here, "here" being New Mexico.
-=- I still say thank you to the bus driver when I get
off, I am not the only one that does this, it's fairly common.-=-
Lots of people say something. "Thank you" or "Thanks" or "See ya!" or "Have
a good day."
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Schuyler Waynforth
--- In [email protected], Princess
<neat_and_pretty@y...> wrote:
I'm only 20 miles or so south of you.
Schuyler
<neat_and_pretty@y...> wrote:
>I thought your e-mail looked familiar. Even though we've never met,
> In Tyne & Wear, just about six miles outside of Newcastle we live.
I'm only 20 miles or so south of you.
Schuyler
Joy
Hi
I've not heard the term snipping and I live in England, I'm
guessing it's probably a regional variation of the language. I have
heard the term sniping but that's not quite the same thing.
It is amazing to me sometimes how only 20 miles here in the UK or even less
sometimes <g>
people have such regional differences. I've personally never known people
anywhere else
who so enjoy confounding others with slang? words. <g> My parents came to
visit me once here in
the UK years and years ago. They stayed in a B&B.
The lady who fixed them breakfast must have called the fried eggs
"splashed". For the rest of our time
visiting all over the UK they often requested "splashed" eggs!! at breakfst
even though I did tell them it was very
possibly a regional thing or maybe even just a word that lady used. I do
wonder now how many people out there
might now tell others that the 'Americans' call fried eggs- splashed. <g>
Joy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I've not heard the term snipping and I live in England, I'm
guessing it's probably a regional variation of the language. I have
heard the term sniping but that's not quite the same thing.
It is amazing to me sometimes how only 20 miles here in the UK or even less
sometimes <g>
people have such regional differences. I've personally never known people
anywhere else
who so enjoy confounding others with slang? words. <g> My parents came to
visit me once here in
the UK years and years ago. They stayed in a B&B.
The lady who fixed them breakfast must have called the fried eggs
"splashed". For the rest of our time
visiting all over the UK they often requested "splashed" eggs!! at breakfst
even though I did tell them it was very
possibly a regional thing or maybe even just a word that lady used. I do
wonder now how many people out there
might now tell others that the 'Americans' call fried eggs- splashed. <g>
Joy
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Schuyler Waynforth
I know a man who was born in Peterlee (just a hop, skip and a jump
from us) who can tell specifically which town someone is from based on
relatively subtle differences in their accent. But, last night,
while watching a show on UFO's Channel 4 used a southeastern American
accent when dramatizing an event that occurred in the southwest. I
was horrified :>
Schuyler
from us) who can tell specifically which town someone is from based on
relatively subtle differences in their accent. But, last night,
while watching a show on UFO's Channel 4 used a southeastern American
accent when dramatizing an event that occurred in the southwest. I
was horrified :>
Schuyler
--- In [email protected], "Joy" <joyerin@g...> wrote:
>
> Hi
> I've not heard the term snipping and I live in England, I'm
> guessing it's probably a regional variation of the language. I have
> heard the term sniping but that's not quite the same thing.
>
> It is amazing to me sometimes how only 20 miles here in the UK or
even less
> sometimes <g>
> people have such regional differences. I've personally never known
people
> anywhere else
> who so enjoy confounding others with slang? words. <g> My parents
came to
> visit me once here in
> the UK years and years ago. They stayed in a B&B.
> The lady who fixed them breakfast must have called the fried eggs
> "splashed". For the rest of our time
> visiting all over the UK they often requested "splashed" eggs!! at
breakfst
> even though I did tell them it was very
> possibly a regional thing or maybe even just a word that lady used.
I do
> wonder now how many people out there
> might now tell others that the 'Americans' call fried eggs-
splashed. <g>
>
> Joy
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>