Re: Dumbest thing.... choices & guilt
deedeanne
I'm sort of going off on a tangent here, but the topics were really
hitting home with me. Sandra just
wrote:
<<Doesn't matter whether it was your child's choice, from her point
of view.
And objectively, either. If that turns out to have been "a bad
choice," then
it's the mom's fault for allowing him to make a bad choice.
Without choices, people don't risk as much guilt or failure.
People can have a measure of innocence and guiltlessness, but it
costs
freedom and choice. And it DOES risk failure and disappointment
every time, at
every turn.
Bummer about the prevalance of homeschooling is that it made school
a choice
and spreads the guilt. And the better unschooling works, the more
guilt
seeps into having chosen school at home.
I don't think it can be helped.>>
My mother has really been pressuring me about my oldest son entering
High School next fall. After being out of school since 5th grade,
and knowing he has always had the option to return, and being
specifically asked if he wants to "try it", he said, "No." This
past year has been a difficult one for our son and us, as he has
wanted to do less of the activities that I do with his younger 2
siblings, but he hasn't found lots that he likes to do with the time
he would have been involved with us. He does have interests, but is
often saying he is bored and wants to go somewhere. We usually go
somewhere new at least once a week, but he rarely admits that it's
fun, even if I see him enjoy the activity.
Anyhow, some of the dumbest things I've heard about homeschooling,
or the "choice" to homeschool, have been made by my mother in her
desperate attempts to convince me to "send him to High school." She
said, "Do you think he's really old enough to make that kind of
choice?" "Maybe he wouldn't be so bored if he went school, where he
could be exposed to all kinds of things, and trying new things that
you can't expose him to because you have the other two little ones
there." (The "little ones" are 8yo and 5yo) I told her that how can
school expose him to more than the world outside of school, besides
the fact that he's already been to school and he knows what they
have to offer.
On a more personal note, my mother said, "It's (homeschooling) is
fine for the younger ones because it's working. I don't see it
working with him (my 13yo). He's not doing anything. He's unhappy
and he resents you." I was too defensive to even think to ask her
how she knew he resents me! But it immediately filled me with such
GUILT! I'm pretty sure that he is past the point where he would give
up his freedom to jump through the hoops of traditonal school. We've
talked about it. But could he be resenting me for starting us all
down this path? I can't really talk to him right now, because he is
on his first trip to a sleepover camp!!! Ugghhhhh!!
Maybe none of this is remotely related. Maybe I'm just grasping at
straws because I'm panicky, with no one to talk to right now. It's
so true, "with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
that?) I thought I had courage in making the choice to unschool, but
I think I need to review the risks of NOT unschooling. I think I
could use some backup here, if anyone is so inclined (or not too
worn out from reading this post!)
Deanne
(counting the days until the L&L conference -- 117)
hitting home with me. Sandra just
wrote:
<<Doesn't matter whether it was your child's choice, from her point
of view.
And objectively, either. If that turns out to have been "a bad
choice," then
it's the mom's fault for allowing him to make a bad choice.
Without choices, people don't risk as much guilt or failure.
People can have a measure of innocence and guiltlessness, but it
costs
freedom and choice. And it DOES risk failure and disappointment
every time, at
every turn.
Bummer about the prevalance of homeschooling is that it made school
a choice
and spreads the guilt. And the better unschooling works, the more
guilt
seeps into having chosen school at home.
I don't think it can be helped.>>
My mother has really been pressuring me about my oldest son entering
High School next fall. After being out of school since 5th grade,
and knowing he has always had the option to return, and being
specifically asked if he wants to "try it", he said, "No." This
past year has been a difficult one for our son and us, as he has
wanted to do less of the activities that I do with his younger 2
siblings, but he hasn't found lots that he likes to do with the time
he would have been involved with us. He does have interests, but is
often saying he is bored and wants to go somewhere. We usually go
somewhere new at least once a week, but he rarely admits that it's
fun, even if I see him enjoy the activity.
Anyhow, some of the dumbest things I've heard about homeschooling,
or the "choice" to homeschool, have been made by my mother in her
desperate attempts to convince me to "send him to High school." She
said, "Do you think he's really old enough to make that kind of
choice?" "Maybe he wouldn't be so bored if he went school, where he
could be exposed to all kinds of things, and trying new things that
you can't expose him to because you have the other two little ones
there." (The "little ones" are 8yo and 5yo) I told her that how can
school expose him to more than the world outside of school, besides
the fact that he's already been to school and he knows what they
have to offer.
On a more personal note, my mother said, "It's (homeschooling) is
fine for the younger ones because it's working. I don't see it
working with him (my 13yo). He's not doing anything. He's unhappy
and he resents you." I was too defensive to even think to ask her
how she knew he resents me! But it immediately filled me with such
GUILT! I'm pretty sure that he is past the point where he would give
up his freedom to jump through the hoops of traditonal school. We've
talked about it. But could he be resenting me for starting us all
down this path? I can't really talk to him right now, because he is
on his first trip to a sleepover camp!!! Ugghhhhh!!
Maybe none of this is remotely related. Maybe I'm just grasping at
straws because I'm panicky, with no one to talk to right now. It's
so true, "with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
that?) I thought I had courage in making the choice to unschool, but
I think I need to review the risks of NOT unschooling. I think I
could use some backup here, if anyone is so inclined (or not too
worn out from reading this post!)
Deanne
(counting the days until the L&L conference -- 117)
Tracy Mckenzie
-
"with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
That was a "quote" from the Spider Man movie !!! LOL
Tracymc
"with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
> that?)Deanne,
That was a "quote" from the Spider Man movie !!! LOL
Tracymc
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: Tracy Mckenzie <ptjcs52@...>
"with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
That was a "quote" from the Spider Man movie !!! LOL
-=-=-=-=-
Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes great
responsibility."
Ben altered that a bit for last year's conference and said (and he may
have stolen it from somewhere else for all I know!), "With great
freedom comes great responsibility" because that's what he was talking
about.
Deanne was there, so it probably stuck! <g>
~Kelly
From: Tracy Mckenzie <ptjcs52@...>
"with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
> that?)Deanne,
That was a "quote" from the Spider Man movie !!! LOL
-=-=-=-=-
Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes great
responsibility."
Ben altered that a bit for last year's conference and said (and he may
have stolen it from somewhere else for all I know!), "With great
freedom comes great responsibility" because that's what he was talking
about.
Deanne was there, so it probably stuck! <g>
~Kelly
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: kbcdlovejo@...
-=-=-=-=-
Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes great
responsibility."
Ben altered that a bit for last year's conference and said (and he may
have stolen it from somewhere else for all I know!), "With great
freedom comes great responsibility" because that's what he was talking
about.-=-=-
Reply to my own post:
Ben said that it was a Winston Churchill quote---the
freedom/responsibility one.
~Kelly
From: kbcdlovejo@...
-=-=-=-=-
Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes great
responsibility."
Ben altered that a bit for last year's conference and said (and he may
have stolen it from somewhere else for all I know!), "With great
freedom comes great responsibility" because that's what he was talking
about.-=-=-
Reply to my own post:
Ben said that it was a Winston Churchill quote---the
freedom/responsibility one.
~Kelly
deedeanne
--- In [email protected], kbcdlovejo@a... wrote:
to check it out. (I love that movie.) I thought it was, "With great
POWER..." or something like that, because it had to do with
Spiderman's powers. Now that was Uncle Ben speaking that time, not
your Ben right, Kelly? But where did you're Ben get his quote from,
any idea? I seem to remember hearing it in connection with voting,
or some talk aimed at kids to make "wise" decisions.
Deanne
> -----Original Message-----great
> From: Tracy Mckenzie <ptjcs52@y...>
>
> "with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
> > that?)
>
> Deanne,
>
> That was a "quote" from the Spider Man movie !!! LOL
>
> -=-=-=-=-
>
> Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes
> responsibility."may
>
> Ben altered that a bit for last year's conference and said (and he
> have stolen it from somewhere else for all I know!), "With greattalking
> freedom comes great responsibility" because that's what he was
> about.This is too funny. I was scrounging around for our Spiderman II DVD
>
> Deanne was there, so it probably stuck! <g>
>
> ~Kelly
to check it out. (I love that movie.) I thought it was, "With great
POWER..." or something like that, because it had to do with
Spiderman's powers. Now that was Uncle Ben speaking that time, not
your Ben right, Kelly? But where did you're Ben get his quote from,
any idea? I seem to remember hearing it in connection with voting,
or some talk aimed at kids to make "wise" decisions.
Deanne
Elizabeth Hill
I found this on quotations.about.com
***Winston Churchill: Quotes: Power*
The price of greatness is responsibility.**
Quotes do seem to mutate. Like playing telephone. (and any quote out
of context on the internet may not be the original.)
Betsy
***Winston Churchill: Quotes: Power*
The price of greatness is responsibility.**
Quotes do seem to mutate. Like playing telephone. (and any quote out
of context on the internet may not be the original.)
Betsy
[email protected]
In a message dated 6/13/2005 6:32:37 PM Mountain Daylight Time,
ptjcs52@... writes:
"with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
That was a "quote" from the Spider Man movie !!! LOL
================
That was power, not freedom.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
ptjcs52@... writes:
"with great freedom, comes great responsibility." (Who said
> that?)Deanne,
That was a "quote" from the Spider Man movie !!! LOL
================
That was power, not freedom.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
In a message dated 6/13/2005 8:34:56 PM Mountain Daylight Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
Ben said that it was a Winston Churchill quote---the
freedom/responsibility one.
I think John F. Kennedy said he dad or grandfather used to say that with
privilege comes responsibility---that their family had a duty to serve others.
(Not a direct quote, and it wasn't freedom or power.)
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
Ben said that it was a Winston Churchill quote---the
freedom/responsibility one.
I think John F. Kennedy said he dad or grandfather used to say that with
privilege comes responsibility---that their family had a duty to serve others.
(Not a direct quote, and it wasn't freedom or power.)
Sandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
K Krejci
I grew up with 'For every right, there is a
responsibility.' That was probably my parents'
version of the Kennedy family version of the Churchill
version?
Kathy
--- SandraDodd@... wrote:
http://www.good2bdognutz.com
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responsibility.' That was probably my parents'
version of the Kennedy family version of the Churchill
version?
Kathy
--- SandraDodd@... wrote:
>http://us.click.yahoo.com/ig21TC/isnJAA/HwKMAA/0xXolB/TM
> In a message dated 6/13/2005 8:34:56 PM Mountain
> Daylight Time,
> kbcdlovejo@... writes:
>
> Ben said that it was a Winston Churchill
> quote---the
> freedom/responsibility one.
>
>
> I think John F. Kennedy said he dad or grandfather
> used to say that with
> privilege comes responsibility---that their family
> had a duty to serve others.
> (Not a direct quote, and it wasn't freedom or
> power.)
>
> Sandra
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been
> removed]
>
>
>
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In a message dated 6/13/2005 9:23:08 PM Central Standard Time,
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes great
responsibility."
~~~
It's a Biblical principle. Probably way farther back than that. "To whom
much is given, much is required."
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kbcdlovejo@... writes:
Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes great
responsibility."
~~~
It's a Biblical principle. Probably way farther back than that. "To whom
much is given, much is required."
Karen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tracy Mckenzie
Well, the Spiderman quote is actually, "With great POWER comes
great
I just watched "Spider Man" not four nights ago, I should have
remembered that !!!
Oh well...chalk one "Opps" up for me !!!
Tracymc
---
great
> responsibility."Kelly....you are correct !!! LOL..as my son would say,"My Bad".
>
>
I just watched "Spider Man" not four nights ago, I should have
remembered that !!!
Oh well...chalk one "Opps" up for me !!!
Tracymc
---