Tracy

Hi Everyone....I'm new to the list and I wanted to introduce myself.
My name is Tracy and my husband and I are raising our only child (6
year old daughter, Jocelyn) in NE Indiana, on our farm. We grow corn
and beans, and have a stable where we board horses. My husband works
a day job for half the year usually, though it looks like he will
work all year this year.

I stumbled across "unschooling" when looking for homeschooling
information when my daughter was only 3...I had her in preschool for
6 weeks and yanked her out immediatly after we visited and observed
the class inconspicuoisly. Shortly after that I read the Unschooling
Handbook and, well, never looked back.

From time to time I get hung up on "homeschooling" because part of
me really feels like she will really enjoy life more if "she'd just
learn to read!"...but she is teaching herself to some degree - site
reading many words and even sounding out a few. But she has a speech
hang up (impediment, whatever) and it really seems to impede her
understanding of word structure. I keep waiting for *that* to
magically fix itself because the alternative is speech therapy.
AND....that would mean taking her to the school district and it
would mean getting her shots up to date (I'm not crazy about it and
frankly neither is Jocelyn - my husband on the other hand is crazy
with anxiety that she hasn't had all of her shots *sigh*).

Aside from running the stable, I was running a small business
selling handmade soaps and lotions. That business really took off
and I became so busy that recently it occurred to me that I
was "working" and my daughter, house, diet, health, and sanity were
all suffering because of it. My house became a pig-sty, I became
anxious and resentful (my hobby was taking over my life and ruining
my day...even the horses were suffering because of my lack of time
and organization). So last month I quit...closed up shop. Jocelyn
was so glad when I made the decision that she ran up to her daddy
when he walked in and said "Mommy's not going to sell soap anymore,
so now she can spend time with me!"...pretty clear that I made the
right choice.

So we have spent the last month playing with the horses (no big
surprise that as Unschoolers we also practice Natural Horsemanship,
which is basically Unschooling for horses), working in the garden,
and TRYING to get the house organized. But I've lost something over
the last 2 years since my business overwhelmed me:
direction and motivation. I still can't seem to get the house
organized and I'm not used to focusing on "play" with Jocelyn. I
need something to motivate me again, and to get me using my other
brain again. I was so fired up about life before, and now it's a
miracle if I get dinner on the table.

So I'd love some inspiration! A good book to read. A great story,
website, anything! Maybe reading the archives on this list will be
all I need? Maybe posting this novella will be all I need (so sorry
*b*)....but I feel like the excitement about living an unschooling
life has been put out. I want it back!

Any ideas?

If so, I'll be forever grateful :)

Tracy in Indiana

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: Tracy <scott.hutchins@...>

So I'd love some inspiration! A good book to read. A great story,
website, anything! Maybe reading the archives on this list will be
all I need? Maybe posting this novella will be all I need (so sorry
*b*)....but I feel like the excitement about living an unschooling
life has been put out. I want it back!

Any ideas?

-=-=-=-

Reading here will be a big help---and the archives will keep you busy
for MONTHS!

By the time you've read it all,.....<g>.....it will be October and time
to pack for the Live and Learn Unschooling Conference in the St Louis
area.

It's a great shot in the arm: a hotel (or two) FULL of unschoolers. All
ages. Inspirational speakers. Funshops. A Raffle. And lots of surprises!

A MUST-attend!

~Kelly


Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
October 6-9, 2005
http://liveandlearnconference.org

arcarpenter2003

--- In [email protected], "Tracy"
<scott.hutchins@m...> wrote:
==
== But I've lost something over
> the last 2 years since my business overwhelmed me:
> direction and motivation. I still can't seem to get the house
> organized and I'm not used to focusing on "play" with Jocelyn. I
> need something to motivate me again, and to get me using my other
> brain again. I was so fired up about life before, and now it's a
> miracle if I get dinner on the table.==

I often feel the same way after a busy couple of *days* (not to
mention 2 years). So for a few days I let the housework go, I make
sure the kids are happy, I order out for dinner and I hole up and do
something that probably seems aimless and "unmotivated": watch TV,
read a People magazine, bounce a ball against the garage door, wander
around the neighborhood, sit in a coffee shop and stare out the window.

I think it's called *resting*. <G>

Resting and letting things go may be what your mind, body and soul
need to do in order to get in tune with the rhythm of your life and
your daughter's life again. Rest. Flow. It can feel quite
uncomfortable, but I find that if I relax into the discomfort, I can
learn from it, too.

Also, you said that your soap business turned from a hobby -- playing
-- into something that ruled your life. I wonder if you've become a
bit wary of play? Or forgotten how? Just a thought. I think if you
were in a more playful state of mind, your lack of direction and
motivation wouldn't bother you so much -- you'd be too busy having fun.

Peace,
Amy

Danielle Conger

Tracy wrote:

>Hi Everyone....I'm new to the list and I wanted to introduce myself.
>My name is Tracy and my husband and I are raising our only child (6
>year old daughter, Jocelyn) in NE Indiana, on our farm. We grow corn
>and beans, and have a stable where we board horses. My husband works
>a day job for half the year usually, though it looks like he will
>work all year this year.*****
>
>So I'd love some inspiration! A good book to read. A great story,
>website, anything! Maybe reading the archives on this list will be
>all I need? Maybe posting this novella will be all I need (so sorry
>*b*)....but I feel like the excitement about living an unschooling
>life has been put out. I want it back!
>
>
Hi Tracy,

Sounds like you put a great deal of careful thought into your decision
and ended up with a solution that puts your family as your first
priority after seeing how it had been slipping into the background.
That's wonderful! And it sounds like your daughter is just thrilled with
the decision.

This list is truly inspirational, and I would strongly encourage you to
attend the Live and Learn Conference Kelly mentioned--you will leave
thoroughly inspired and recharged after spending several days in a hotel
full of other Unschoolers!

I'd also like to invite you to join the AlwaysUnschooled e-list (
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlwaysUnschooled/ ) as well where you'll
be able to chat with lots of moms and a dad or two who Unschool young
children. It's great to "hang out" with a bunch of parents dealing with
the same joys and the same struggles, and it compliments the veteran
wisdom you'll find here at UnschoolingDiscussion very nicely, I think.
For me, it's nice to hear both the "I'm going through that now, too, and
here's how I'm dealing with it" as well as the "I've been there done
that and it will all work out if you just relax and trust them."

You're also welcome to check out my webpage and my blog linked from it (
http://www.danielleconger.com/Homeschool/Welcomehome.html ) where you
can read lots about my three children, Emily (7), Julia (6) and Sam (5).
We're getting ready to move to a 5.24 acre farmette, and we're very
excited! But I will heed your warning and be very careful not to let my
hobby take over my life! ;)

My almost 8 year old can "read" but isn't reading. Her journey has been
incredible to watch, and she's doing such amazing things and making all
kinds of great connections. I have no doubt it will all fall into place
over night when it becomes important to her. My 6 year old is no where
close to reading, but she likes to "work" at it. She likes to sit down
and *do* things, but often in fleeting bursts. Again, I trust that her
approach is exactly what *she* needs and that it will all fall into
place for her as well when she's ready. There's still lots of time!

Hope to see you on the AlwaysUnschooled list!

--
~~Danielle
Emily (7), Julia (6), Sam (5)
http://www.danielleconger.com/Homeschool/Welcomehome.html

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"With our thoughts, we make the world." ~~Buddha

Elizabeth Hill

**

But she has a speech
hang up (impediment, whatever) and it really seems to impede her
understanding of word structure.**

What you describe could be a hearing problem, a problem with what's called "auditory discrimination". Some kids, apparently, can't process the difference between brief sounds.

With really common speech problems, like not pronouncing R's, I would think that kids still can come close to phonetic spelling, as they still hear the words clearly. Real confusion about spelling could be an input issue (clear hearing), not an output issue (speech or sequencing with writing).

Do read Sandra's links on reading. "Late" reading is quite common, and outside of school it doesn't lead to frustration and failure, really. Learning *slowly* and learning when one is ready to learn make learning less confusing and more lasting. Confusion is not the desired outcome. :-)

Betsy

soggyboysmom

--- In [email protected], "Tracy"
<scott.hutchins@m...> wrote:
But she has a speech
> hang up (impediment, whatever) and it really seems to impede her
> understanding of word structure. I keep waiting for *that* to
> magically fix itself because the alternative is speech therapy.
> AND....that would mean taking her to the school district and it
> would mean getting her shots up to date (I'm not crazy about it >and
> frankly neither is Jocelyn - my husband on the other hand is crazy
> with anxiety that she hasn't had all of her shots *sigh*).>
> Tracy in Indiana

school district - not necessarily. Speech issues and appropriate
therapy are not the sole province of the school district. A good
alternative is a college or university with advanced courses in speech
pathology - the grad students need patients to try out their book
learning on (there's always someone overseeing their work) and they
often have free or low cost options which help if insurance coverage
isn't available. Likewise, an ENT (to check the hearing issues - DH
spent time getting serious testing done a year or so ago - a nasty ear
infection caused scarring which took away the higher pitches in one
ear) is/can be an independent agent - if it was a hearing issue, the
school would probably have to refer you outside anyhow - they can't do
the kinds of detailed testing involved. All this mostly to say if you
think there's a problem and it is interfering/comes to
interfere/frustrates your DD, you don't "have to" get involved with
the school system - there are alternatives available.

my3sonsinva

If you are worried about speech, you can buy materials to use at
home. I bought earobics for my middle child and my youngest begs to
use it. They think it's fun because it is game based.

www.earobics.com
superduperinc.com - has some free materials and a big catalog with
everything you could ever need

Oh, I bought a phonics game that can be used for speech therapy.
It's called Color Phonics. I don't force the kids to use this
software, just leave it out in case they want to play with it.

Barb in VA


>
> So I'd love some inspiration! A good book to read. A great story,
> website, anything! Maybe reading the archives on this list will be
> all I need? Maybe posting this novella will be all I need (so
sorry
> *b*)....but I feel like the excitement about living an unschooling
> life has been put out. I want it back!
>
> Any ideas?
>
> If so, I'll be forever grateful :)
>
> Tracy in Indiana

Tracy

>What you describe could be a hearing problem, a problem with what's
>called
>"auditory discrimination". Some kids, apparently, can't process the
>difference
>between brief sounds.

Would this be different than being hard of hearing? Because Jocelyn
can hear extremely faint sounds. For instance, she once put her ear
to an egg that we removed from a chicken and she could hear
the "peck" inside because it was ready to hatch...this is a very,
very faint sound and it wasn't promted by me - I didnt tell her that
she be able to hear anything if she listened. She described the
sound too. And just last night she heard dad whisper a word he
didn't want her to hear. She was 20 feet away and it wasn't a word
she'd ever heard so she didn't just figure it out (oh no, she
said, "What's a f****** bastard?").

I have always felt that the muscles in her mouth/brain connection
don't jive. Because when she concentrates she can say the difficult
sounds. It takes practice though, and she gets better
with "exercising" the mouth with that sound.

Tracy

Tracy

> Also, you said that your soap business turned from a hobby -- playing
> -- into something that ruled your life. I wonder if you've become a
> bit wary of play? Or forgotten how? Just a thought. I think if you
> were in a more playful state of mind, your lack of direction and
> motivation wouldn't bother you so much -- you'd be too busy having
fun.
>
> Peace,
> Amy

Amy, thank you for responding. You really hit on something for me to
focus on. I've noticed that I really don't know what to do without
something to do. I did "nothing" very well when Jocelyn was a
baby/toddler and nursing. That was my focus and when she quit nursing
I started doing other things...I felt sort of "freed up" having more
opportunity to start a project or whatever. That lead into the
business.

So now, when I start playing with Jocelyn I can actually hear myself
saying "Okay, mommies got stuff to do!" in my head, yet there's
nothing to do (besides barn chores and the horses but that is
something she very willingly participates in).

It's just the transition and I need to remind myself that I really
don't have anything better to do than hang out with the kiddo :). I
think it's like when I go to the strore without Jocelyn and I keep
looking to see that she's near, even though she's at home with dad.
It's a habit and I will break it.

We're going down to the lake today to build a slide off the dock.
She's thrilled and it will be a perfect time to practice not having
anything *else* to do :)

Thanks again for pointing it out for me.

Tracy

Tracy

Danielle...I've bookmarked the sites and can't wait to look them
over tonight. THANKS so much.

And congratulations on your new property! I hope you enjoy living in
the country as much as I do. I find my daughter knows so much about
nature...she loves to talk to people about it and surprises me what
she picks up on living on this farm (well, I'm not really
surprised). I loved it when she explained a boy at the zoo we were
visiting, what a placenta was. the mother thought she was being
crude and I was just beaming with enthusiasm. *g*




--- > I'd also like to invite you to join the AlwaysUnschooled e-
list (
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlwaysUnschooled/ ) as well where
you'll
> be able to chat with lots of moms and a dad or two who Unschool
young
>> You're also welcome to check out my webpage and my blog linked
from it (
> http://www.danielleconger.com/Homeschool/Welcomehome.html ) where
you
> can read lots about my three children, Emily (7), Julia (6) and
Sam (5).
> We're getting ready to move to a 5.24 acre farmette, and we're
very
> excited! But I will heed your warning and be very careful not to
let my
> hobby take over my life! ;)
>

Elizabeth Hill

**

What you describe could be a hearing problem, a problem with what's
>called
>"auditory discrimination". Some kids, apparently, can't process the
>difference
>between brief sounds.


Would this be different than being hard of hearing? Because Jocelyn
can hear extremely faint sounds. **

Yes, it is different. You can find info by googling "auditory discrimination" with quotes around the phrase.

**I have always felt that the muscles in her mouth/brain connection
don't jive. Because when she concentrates she can say the difficult
sounds. It takes practice though, and she gets better
with "exercising" the mouth with that sound. **

OK, you've got a lot of observations to go on. Your understanding of what is going on is clearer than mine.

Betsy

Anna Wolfe

hi Tracey,
if I were you, this is what I would do (I am a veteran
of more house-moves and room-moves and changes of plan
than I can remember)...
Have your daughter help you with a day or 2 --no
more!!!--of moving everything not of immediate use
into one room or closet or shed and leaving it there.
When you pick up an item, you don't have to actually
even know what it is. You just have to decide if you
have an immediate use for it. (you know: toothbrush,
hairbrush, pen, a glass, etc.) If you don't, I like to
put it in the designated zone by size. You can use
whatever sorting system works. The key is to make it
quick. then, close the door.
Next, give every other room a good dusting.
then, start over. As you think of things you need for
whatever projects you will dream up, you can go and
fetch them then. On some days you will be hit with a
fever of sorting out those things, and you can do that
then. Don't worry about it until it happens.
My son is 12 and I still have a few drawers I haven't
sorted out yet. So what? I know where they are, and
that's all I need to know.
Anna

__________________________________________________
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Tracy

Well I was motivated by your advice! I didn't move things into a
special area - though I started. It made me realize though, that my
problem had become those special accessory rooms were wiped out so
cleaning anything else became impossible. So I spent the wwekend on
the laundry room, mud room and pantry (all places where I would pile
when I was too lazy/tired/hurried). My husband was quite helpful by
keeping Jocelyn occupied so I could just zone out and get it done.
Once those rooms were tidied, everything else sort of "fell into
place! The fact was that I couldn't put anything away,
because "away" meant going into one of those rooms which meant
cleaning them (and I wasn't motivated).

So I am proud to say that everything is tidy enough today, that I
can now get back to a regular "cleaning" (mopping, dusting) schedule
and not avoid it because of the disorganization.

What a releif! It's amazing what reading a post from a stranger can
do for motivation!

I didn't get to the drawers yet...ther are a couple of them....;)

> My son is 12 and I still have a few drawers I haven't
> sorted out yet. So what? I know where they are, and
> that's all I need to know.
> Anna
>
> __________________________________________________
> Do You Yahoo!?
> Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around
> http://mail.yahoo.com

Robyn Coburn

<<<<<I stumbled across "unschooling" when looking for homeschooling
information when my daughter was only 3...I had her in preschool for
6 weeks and yanked her out immediatly after we visited and observed
the class inconspicuoisly. Shortly after that I read the Unschooling
Handbook and, well, never looked back. >>>> snip

So I'd love some inspiration! A good book to read. A great story,
website, anything! Maybe reading the archives on this list will be
all I need? Maybe posting this novella will be all I need (so sorry
*b*)....but I feel like the excitement about living an unschooling
life has been put out. I want it back! >>>>>

I just wanted to second Danielle's invitation over to Always Unschooled. We
also have an informal book discussion once a month and a list of oft
recommended books in the Database section of the home page at Yahoo.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlwaysUnschooled/database

Robyn L. Coburn





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