Re: [unschoolingbasics] Digest Number 720
Sandra Zires
Good evening all,
I am new to this group, Nashville, homeschooling and unschooling. I have three children, 7, 5, & 2. I pulled my 7 yr old from ps after the winter break. He had been in various public and private PT schools since he was 2 1/2 and hated EVERY moment. His behavior at home was TERRIBLE, at school, however, he was an angel. When I inquired about his behavior his teachers always raved that he was a model student. I knew that he hated it though. Deep down I feared that he was better off in school due to the fact that I had such trouble with his impulsiveness and aggression toward his smaller siblings.
To make a LONG story short I started some serious work on my own spiritual growth. I devoured all the books that I could that pertained to Peace, parenting and the journey of the soul. I learned quite a bit. I am now strong and feel ready to unschool my children. I handle our conflicts & challenges with a sense of patience I never knew. My son is LOVING life!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So am I. Thank you all for participating on this site. I have finally found a place I can talk about my beliefs without fear of ridicule.
Good night.
Peace & Blessings,
Sandra
PS... I found The Family Virtues Guide: Simple Ways to Bring Out the Best in Our Children and Ourselves. (Linda Popov) a wonderful tool. I highly recommend it. It helps parents and children learn and use the language of the virtues.
I am new to this group, Nashville, homeschooling and unschooling. I have three children, 7, 5, & 2. I pulled my 7 yr old from ps after the winter break. He had been in various public and private PT schools since he was 2 1/2 and hated EVERY moment. His behavior at home was TERRIBLE, at school, however, he was an angel. When I inquired about his behavior his teachers always raved that he was a model student. I knew that he hated it though. Deep down I feared that he was better off in school due to the fact that I had such trouble with his impulsiveness and aggression toward his smaller siblings.
To make a LONG story short I started some serious work on my own spiritual growth. I devoured all the books that I could that pertained to Peace, parenting and the journey of the soul. I learned quite a bit. I am now strong and feel ready to unschool my children. I handle our conflicts & challenges with a sense of patience I never knew. My son is LOVING life!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So am I. Thank you all for participating on this site. I have finally found a place I can talk about my beliefs without fear of ridicule.
Good night.
Peace & Blessings,
Sandra
PS... I found The Family Virtues Guide: Simple Ways to Bring Out the Best in Our Children and Ourselves. (Linda Popov) a wonderful tool. I highly recommend it. It helps parents and children learn and use the language of the virtues.
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-----Original Message-----
From: Sandra Zires <sandralzires@...>
His behavior at home was TERRIBLE, at school, however, he
was an angel. When I inquired about his behavior his teachers always raved that
he was a model student. I knew that he hated it though. Deep down I feared
that he was better off in school due to the fact that I had such trouble with
his impulsiveness and aggression toward his smaller siblings.
-=-=-=-
Any chance he was "acting out" at home because he felt safe enough *there* as opposed to at school,
where he *knew* they didn't love and respect him? He used up every bit of his energy being a model
student during the day, so that by the time he got home there was nothing left? Yet he still knew you
would love and accept him, so he could blow off steam and take things out on you and his siblings without
being sent to the principal's office?
Poor kids in school. I think that's a common problem. They try to be on their best behaviot there because
parents ask them to and because it's what's expected. But they are given no time to wind down and get rid
of all the pent up anger and frustrations they have. The younger sibling, the dog, and Mom become the
resipients because they're safe and they'll love him anyway.
~KellyKelly LovejoyConference CoordinatorLive and Learn Unschooling Conferencehttp://liveandlearnconference.org
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
From: Sandra Zires <sandralzires@...>
His behavior at home was TERRIBLE, at school, however, he
was an angel. When I inquired about his behavior his teachers always raved that
he was a model student. I knew that he hated it though. Deep down I feared
that he was better off in school due to the fact that I had such trouble with
his impulsiveness and aggression toward his smaller siblings.
-=-=-=-
Any chance he was "acting out" at home because he felt safe enough *there* as opposed to at school,
where he *knew* they didn't love and respect him? He used up every bit of his energy being a model
student during the day, so that by the time he got home there was nothing left? Yet he still knew you
would love and accept him, so he could blow off steam and take things out on you and his siblings without
being sent to the principal's office?
Poor kids in school. I think that's a common problem. They try to be on their best behaviot there because
parents ask them to and because it's what's expected. But they are given no time to wind down and get rid
of all the pent up anger and frustrations they have. The younger sibling, the dog, and Mom become the
resipients because they're safe and they'll love him anyway.
~KellyKelly LovejoyConference CoordinatorLive and Learn Unschooling Conferencehttp://liveandlearnconference.org
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
patrick morris
hi
first wanted add to a comment of someone saying waldorf schools
don't begin reading till 7; R. Steiner the creater of this curiculum
said kids really should not begin school at all until at least 12
years of age, but that the waldorf method was a compromise with the
german govt requirements. as a former class teacher I found waldorf
has deteriorated into a mere art tinged venture.
some one wrote about college for unschoolers and asked for replies;
we have been unschooling for 2 years now , my son is 13 and the whole
concept of college as a given has crashed for me as of late. I have
13 years of college level education and my wife 12. these have given
some oppurtunities and plenty of debt. My experience is that income
producing structures shift throughout ones lifetime. Many things are
caged out requiring degrees and other formalized hoops, but many are
not.
I am hoping my son will find some way to make a living at some time
in his 20's , but I am more interested that he engage his experience
of life with a level of intent constructed by him and less as a
reaction to what the "others" dictate as a necessity. I feel I have
wasted too much of my decision making on finding a way to live within
a defensable posture of what a man is supposed to do in life. College
seems to be a 'working world lite' indoctrination, offering a taste
of the good life, and hooking one on the anxieties of our culture,
learning to figure out where you fit in and honing an ability to be
perjoritive to others as a defense to feeling vulnerable and needy.
It doesn't seem to have much difference to the lower levels of
eductional rigidity.
I think if you have to go through an experience that is unpleasant
due to an artifice designed with little validity, just to get to the
other side, then your likely to be infected with a veiw of reality
that will continue to propogate. its hard to turn paradigms around,
what you think is important now will determine how you understand
life. Our constructions of life , of our past influence our
constructions of the present and future. I think every step is
important and college seems pretty loaded with a labyrinth of
compromise solutions that it is going to be incredibly difficult to
analyse, deconstruct and create a reality that isn't stifling.
just an opinion at the moment
patrick
first wanted add to a comment of someone saying waldorf schools
don't begin reading till 7; R. Steiner the creater of this curiculum
said kids really should not begin school at all until at least 12
years of age, but that the waldorf method was a compromise with the
german govt requirements. as a former class teacher I found waldorf
has deteriorated into a mere art tinged venture.
some one wrote about college for unschoolers and asked for replies;
we have been unschooling for 2 years now , my son is 13 and the whole
concept of college as a given has crashed for me as of late. I have
13 years of college level education and my wife 12. these have given
some oppurtunities and plenty of debt. My experience is that income
producing structures shift throughout ones lifetime. Many things are
caged out requiring degrees and other formalized hoops, but many are
not.
I am hoping my son will find some way to make a living at some time
in his 20's , but I am more interested that he engage his experience
of life with a level of intent constructed by him and less as a
reaction to what the "others" dictate as a necessity. I feel I have
wasted too much of my decision making on finding a way to live within
a defensable posture of what a man is supposed to do in life. College
seems to be a 'working world lite' indoctrination, offering a taste
of the good life, and hooking one on the anxieties of our culture,
learning to figure out where you fit in and honing an ability to be
perjoritive to others as a defense to feeling vulnerable and needy.
It doesn't seem to have much difference to the lower levels of
eductional rigidity.
I think if you have to go through an experience that is unpleasant
due to an artifice designed with little validity, just to get to the
other side, then your likely to be infected with a veiw of reality
that will continue to propogate. its hard to turn paradigms around,
what you think is important now will determine how you understand
life. Our constructions of life , of our past influence our
constructions of the present and future. I think every step is
important and college seems pretty loaded with a labyrinth of
compromise solutions that it is going to be incredibly difficult to
analyse, deconstruct and create a reality that isn't stifling.
just an opinion at the moment
patrick