teaching vs. learning
Ren
"That poster was talking about her intentions to continue to direct the
teaching of her children. "
Yes, I agree with Robyn.
I kind of figured we had a newer member to the list, that is definitely interested in unschooling, but not actually unschooling yet. That's ok. This list is to help people learn about unschooling, we don't expect everyone to have the same understanding. But if someone posts about her teaching units she's got planned, it WILL be questioned here. That's what the list if about.
In the guidelines we specifically remind people to not post about that which they don't want to discuss...if you post it here, it's open to discussion.
So let's discuss how teaching never needs to happen in an unschooling home. Let's talk about how teaching implies the power is with the teacher, not the learner, and how unschooling kids KNOW they have the power to learn anything in their own way, because they've not had the notion crammed into their heads that they NEED someone else (with all the answers/power) to teach them.
My dear, sweet stargirl..Sierra, informed me that she didn't need gymnastics class anymore. She told me to call them and tell them she won't be back, because she can teach herself gymnastics just fine.
We called for a refund yesterday.:)
Teaching and learning do not go hand in hand, as we've all been taught to think (imagine that!) We don't need to "delve into history" because history is all around us, everyday and we explore it with the same interest that we pursue all else. Not in units, not in packages, not in a curriculum of any kind, just real life as it naturally swirls into our paths.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
teaching of her children. "
Yes, I agree with Robyn.
I kind of figured we had a newer member to the list, that is definitely interested in unschooling, but not actually unschooling yet. That's ok. This list is to help people learn about unschooling, we don't expect everyone to have the same understanding. But if someone posts about her teaching units she's got planned, it WILL be questioned here. That's what the list if about.
In the guidelines we specifically remind people to not post about that which they don't want to discuss...if you post it here, it's open to discussion.
So let's discuss how teaching never needs to happen in an unschooling home. Let's talk about how teaching implies the power is with the teacher, not the learner, and how unschooling kids KNOW they have the power to learn anything in their own way, because they've not had the notion crammed into their heads that they NEED someone else (with all the answers/power) to teach them.
My dear, sweet stargirl..Sierra, informed me that she didn't need gymnastics class anymore. She told me to call them and tell them she won't be back, because she can teach herself gymnastics just fine.
We called for a refund yesterday.:)
Teaching and learning do not go hand in hand, as we've all been taught to think (imagine that!) We don't need to "delve into history" because history is all around us, everyday and we explore it with the same interest that we pursue all else. Not in units, not in packages, not in a curriculum of any kind, just real life as it naturally swirls into our paths.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
[email protected]
Great idea -- I think we can encourage people to this way of thinking about
learning. It is not a change that happens overnight, however. Like most big
changes.
If someone mentioned unit studies to me, I might ask something about what
their child enjoyed during the unit, how they took off from there, etc.
One example of using a structured learning tool in my house was the book I
bought for DD when she demanded to learn how to read -- "Everyone but me knows
how to read! I want to know NOW!" She was about 6, had some smattering of
reading ability, recognized letters/sounds, a very beginning reader I would say but
did not have a firm grip on reading and was frustrated.
We went online and browsed books and together we chose the "100 Easy Lessons"
book. Now, if you have seen this book, you will know it is not particualrly
unschooling. In and of itself. If I told you I was using this book to help my
daughter learn to read, you'd blink hard if I said it was unschooling.
But for us, it was.
We opened the book and realized that about the first 1/3 was stuff she
already knew, we jumped ahead to things she did not know, and proceeded from there.
We did about the middle 1/3 of the book and then stopped. We stopped because
she could then read well enough to do what she wanted to do and has since just
read everything in sight, going to the library all the time, picking out her
books, etc. She is 9 now and an excellent, confident reader.
So, there are ways and there are ways, imo, to use material. I think people
may rely on schoolish things for a while as they transition to more unschoolish
ways. Or, like us, they may use a schoolish tool when it is appropriate to
learn something -- not all such tools are useless.
Encouraging others to see that using whatever tool works, but owning the
knowledge and the decision to use the tool; seeing a positive step when it is
taken, a step toward learning and away from rigid hierarchical learning setups;
supporting people along the bumpy road as they individually get as far as they
need to -- these seem helpful to me in supporting unschoolers.
Nance
In a message dated 6/23/2004 4:33:54 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
So let's discuss how teaching never needs to happen in an unschooling home.
Let's talk about how teaching implies the power is with the teacher, not the
learner, and how unschooling kids KNOW they have the power to learn anything in
their own way, because they've not had the notion crammed into their heads
that they NEED someone else (with all the answers/power) to teach them.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
learning. It is not a change that happens overnight, however. Like most big
changes.
If someone mentioned unit studies to me, I might ask something about what
their child enjoyed during the unit, how they took off from there, etc.
One example of using a structured learning tool in my house was the book I
bought for DD when she demanded to learn how to read -- "Everyone but me knows
how to read! I want to know NOW!" She was about 6, had some smattering of
reading ability, recognized letters/sounds, a very beginning reader I would say but
did not have a firm grip on reading and was frustrated.
We went online and browsed books and together we chose the "100 Easy Lessons"
book. Now, if you have seen this book, you will know it is not particualrly
unschooling. In and of itself. If I told you I was using this book to help my
daughter learn to read, you'd blink hard if I said it was unschooling.
But for us, it was.
We opened the book and realized that about the first 1/3 was stuff she
already knew, we jumped ahead to things she did not know, and proceeded from there.
We did about the middle 1/3 of the book and then stopped. We stopped because
she could then read well enough to do what she wanted to do and has since just
read everything in sight, going to the library all the time, picking out her
books, etc. She is 9 now and an excellent, confident reader.
So, there are ways and there are ways, imo, to use material. I think people
may rely on schoolish things for a while as they transition to more unschoolish
ways. Or, like us, they may use a schoolish tool when it is appropriate to
learn something -- not all such tools are useless.
Encouraging others to see that using whatever tool works, but owning the
knowledge and the decision to use the tool; seeing a positive step when it is
taken, a step toward learning and away from rigid hierarchical learning setups;
supporting people along the bumpy road as they individually get as far as they
need to -- these seem helpful to me in supporting unschoolers.
Nance
In a message dated 6/23/2004 4:33:54 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
So let's discuss how teaching never needs to happen in an unschooling home.
Let's talk about how teaching implies the power is with the teacher, not the
learner, and how unschooling kids KNOW they have the power to learn anything in
their own way, because they've not had the notion crammed into their heads
that they NEED someone else (with all the answers/power) to teach them.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Maybe so -- but it still seems contrived to have to never use a word -- like
the word has more power than it does. If, in an unschooling home, teaching and
learning are good things, why fight it?
Nance
In a message dated 6/24/2004 4:43:47 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
Maybe instead of thinking that your son taught you, as in a thing that
can be done to someone, think of it as you learned from him, as in you
accepted his help and knowledge freely, and he offered it freely for you
to take or leave as you chose. That emphasizes your control over your
own learning while still acknowledging his generosity.
Jenny
<I haven't given up the word teaching or even left it to those who would
use
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
the word has more power than it does. If, in an unschooling home, teaching and
learning are good things, why fight it?
Nance
In a message dated 6/24/2004 4:43:47 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
Maybe instead of thinking that your son taught you, as in a thing that
can be done to someone, think of it as you learned from him, as in you
accepted his help and knowledge freely, and he offered it freely for you
to take or leave as you chose. That emphasizes your control over your
own learning while still acknowledging his generosity.
Jenny
<I haven't given up the word teaching or even left it to those who would
use
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Krisula Moyer
In a message dated 6/24/2004 4:43:47 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
Maybe instead of thinking that your son taught you, as in a thing that
can be done to someone, think of it as you learned from him, as in you
accepted his help and knowledge freely, and he offered it freely for you
to take or leave as you chose. That emphasizes your control over your
own learning while still acknowledging his generosity.
I think the word teaching is fine to use. One needs to really examine ones
attitude when sharing/ teaching so that we can catch ourselves if we become
too controlling or condescending. Once the mutual respect is in place in
the relationship, there is no need to wory about whether we are teaching,
instructing, facilitating learning, pointing out something interesting,
whatever. It's all good in the context of a mutually respectful
relationship. I say Trayton taught me something. And truly, I was not
interested in Mario per se except that it's something that interests him. A
lot. And I love *him*. So having him teach me that level was enjoyable for
me because I got to admire how beautifully he communicates and enjoy his
passion. I think to say I learned from him instead of he taught me does rob
a little of the due credit from him.
I do think the underlying message of Ren's first response is really
important though. That is, as I understand it, We as the big people are not
here to drive the learning that takes place in our children. They get to
drive. We are guides and facilitators not dictators and controllers. I
think teaching can be done in a controlling relationship but that is not the
only place it is done. Many of us take private lessons in one form or
another and are taught the basics of piano or ice-skating or marshal arts.
Some instructors are bad, unkind, or ineffective others are wonderful
empathic people for whom teaching is their highest calling. The word is
loaded because of the many times it is used to mean "making someone learn."
So if I have gotten past that particular prejudice I'm inclined to reclaim
the word for my own altruistic purposes.
[email protected] writes:
Maybe instead of thinking that your son taught you, as in a thing that
can be done to someone, think of it as you learned from him, as in you
accepted his help and knowledge freely, and he offered it freely for you
to take or leave as you chose. That emphasizes your control over your
own learning while still acknowledging his generosity.
I think the word teaching is fine to use. One needs to really examine ones
attitude when sharing/ teaching so that we can catch ourselves if we become
too controlling or condescending. Once the mutual respect is in place in
the relationship, there is no need to wory about whether we are teaching,
instructing, facilitating learning, pointing out something interesting,
whatever. It's all good in the context of a mutually respectful
relationship. I say Trayton taught me something. And truly, I was not
interested in Mario per se except that it's something that interests him. A
lot. And I love *him*. So having him teach me that level was enjoyable for
me because I got to admire how beautifully he communicates and enjoy his
passion. I think to say I learned from him instead of he taught me does rob
a little of the due credit from him.
I do think the underlying message of Ren's first response is really
important though. That is, as I understand it, We as the big people are not
here to drive the learning that takes place in our children. They get to
drive. We are guides and facilitators not dictators and controllers. I
think teaching can be done in a controlling relationship but that is not the
only place it is done. Many of us take private lessons in one form or
another and are taught the basics of piano or ice-skating or marshal arts.
Some instructors are bad, unkind, or ineffective others are wonderful
empathic people for whom teaching is their highest calling. The word is
loaded because of the many times it is used to mean "making someone learn."
So if I have gotten past that particular prejudice I'm inclined to reclaim
the word for my own altruistic purposes.
pam sorooshian
On Jun 25, 2004, at 1:46 PM, marbleface@... wrote:
try really hard not to think about "teaching" - but to replace it with
"learning."
My mom used to get so irritated with me because I said I never taught
my children to read. She said I did ALL the right things to create a
print-rich environment so that they would learn to read happily and
easily when the time was right for them - and that THAT was the best
teaching there is.
She was right. But - still - if you're new to unschooling it will
benefit you greatly not to think about teaching, just learning. It is
looking at it from a different perspective and it is helpful to do
that.
-pam
National Home Education Network
<www.NHEN.org>
Serving the entire homeschooling community since 1999
through information, networking and public relations.
> Maybe so -- but it still seems contrived to have to never use a wordIt is a very very useful "exercise" for people new to unschooling to
> -- like
> the word has more power than it does. If, in an unschooling home,
> teaching and
> learning are good things, why fight it?
>
try really hard not to think about "teaching" - but to replace it with
"learning."
My mom used to get so irritated with me because I said I never taught
my children to read. She said I did ALL the right things to create a
print-rich environment so that they would learn to read happily and
easily when the time was right for them - and that THAT was the best
teaching there is.
She was right. But - still - if you're new to unschooling it will
benefit you greatly not to think about teaching, just learning. It is
looking at it from a different perspective and it is helpful to do
that.
-pam
National Home Education Network
<www.NHEN.org>
Serving the entire homeschooling community since 1999
through information, networking and public relations.
Fetteroll
on 6/26/04 2:33 AM, Krisula Moyer at krisulam@... wrote:
But I think they should be aware when sharing on a list what effect their
words will have on someone who isn't in the same place they are. If someone
is stuck thinking of teaching as force fed learning and reads unschoolers
discussing "teaching their kids math naturally by living life" it's not
going to help them understand unschooling.
Joyce
> So if I have gotten past that particular prejudice I'm inclined to reclaimI think people should do whatever they feel comfortable with.
> the word for my own altruistic purposes.
But I think they should be aware when sharing on a list what effect their
words will have on someone who isn't in the same place they are. If someone
is stuck thinking of teaching as force fed learning and reads unschoolers
discussing "teaching their kids math naturally by living life" it's not
going to help them understand unschooling.
Joyce
Fetteroll
on 6/25/04 4:46 PM, marbleface@... at marbleface@... wrote:
a greater understanding of unschooling.
But even at home, if we're using teaching to mean learning, when our kids
are immersed in a world where learning means being taught, it has the
potential to not help them think clearly during the times when the
distinctions are important.
That's not a given or a mandate. No one can reach into your home and make
you stop. And obviously I have no way of knowing even what goes on in my own
daughter's head ;-) It's just an idea to try on and turn over and examine.
Joyce
> If, in an unschooling home, teaching andBecause the list isn't our home. It's where we use words to help others gain
> learning are good things, why fight it?
a greater understanding of unschooling.
But even at home, if we're using teaching to mean learning, when our kids
are immersed in a world where learning means being taught, it has the
potential to not help them think clearly during the times when the
distinctions are important.
That's not a given or a mandate. No one can reach into your home and make
you stop. And obviously I have no way of knowing even what goes on in my own
daughter's head ;-) It's just an idea to try on and turn over and examine.
Joyce
[email protected]
In a message dated 6/25/2004 6:15:55 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
marbleface@... writes:
If, in an unschooling home, teaching and
learning are good things, why fight it?
<<<<
But do you understand the difference? Between teaching and learning?
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
marbleface@... writes:
If, in an unschooling home, teaching and
learning are good things, why fight it?
<<<<
But do you understand the difference? Between teaching and learning?
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
sandrewmama
on 6/26/04 9:48 AM, kbcdlovejo@... at kbcdlovejo@... wrote:
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?
Chris
>I have a question. How would you go about explaining to a teen, who expects
>
> But do you understand the difference? Between teaching and learning?
>
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?
Chris
Ren
"I have a question. How would you go about explaining to a teen, who expects
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?"
Gently....very gently.
If a teen is used to the idea that she must be told what/when to learn, it's going to be a bit scary to have the idea thrown at her that SHE is now responsible for her own learning.
Don't make her feel she's on her own, be her partner in this. Talk, talk, talk...about what she loves, what she would love to do (help her plan the PERFECT day) and show her that you are there to help her get where she needs to go. There is nothing worse than feeling like you're on your own with no idea of where to go.
Be her access to the world and her partner in learning.
Maybe she'll want to pursue some schoolish looking things for a while, if that helps her get through the transition..fine.
But point out the lovely, meandering side paths you could check out.
Do things for the pure joy of it, help her reclaim that childlike joy of discovery.
Great healing happens when joy is the focus, you can help her with this.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?"
Gently....very gently.
If a teen is used to the idea that she must be told what/when to learn, it's going to be a bit scary to have the idea thrown at her that SHE is now responsible for her own learning.
Don't make her feel she's on her own, be her partner in this. Talk, talk, talk...about what she loves, what she would love to do (help her plan the PERFECT day) and show her that you are there to help her get where she needs to go. There is nothing worse than feeling like you're on your own with no idea of where to go.
Be her access to the world and her partner in learning.
Maybe she'll want to pursue some schoolish looking things for a while, if that helps her get through the transition..fine.
But point out the lovely, meandering side paths you could check out.
Do things for the pure joy of it, help her reclaim that childlike joy of discovery.
Great healing happens when joy is the focus, you can help her with this.
Ren
Learn about unschooling at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingbasics/
sandrewmama
on 6/26/04 5:59 PM, Ren at starsuncloud@... wrote:
Chris
> Do things for the pure joy of it, help her reclaim that childlike joy ofThanks Ren.
> discovery.
> Great healing happens when joy is the focus, you can help her with this.
>
> Ren
>
Chris
[email protected]
I do.
Nance
In a message dated 6/26/2004 4:01:06 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
From: kbcdlovejo@...
Subject: Re: teaching vs. learning
In a message dated 6/25/2004 6:15:55 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
marbleface@... writes:
If, in an unschooling home, teaching and
learning are good things, why fight it?
<<<<
But do you understand the difference? Between teaching and learning?
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Nance
In a message dated 6/26/2004 4:01:06 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
[email protected] writes:
From: kbcdlovejo@...
Subject: Re: teaching vs. learning
In a message dated 6/25/2004 6:15:55 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
marbleface@... writes:
If, in an unschooling home, teaching and
learning are good things, why fight it?
<<<<
But do you understand the difference? Between teaching and learning?
~Kelly
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Gently....very gently.
"meeting" about every 2-3 weeks. We'd go out to a coffee place or something
and order frappacinos or whatever and we'd talk. We'd talk about what she was
interested in doing and learning. She would bring a notebook and write down
ideas and how she wanted to pursue them. She always had GREAT ideas, it was as
if she just needed a sounding board to get it clear in her mind. It was
something we both looked forward to. I would make some suggestions from time to
time, usually in keeping with her train of thought, but they were JUST
suggestions. I didn't do anything like evaluate or things like that.
Just an idea,
Jamye
>One thing I did with my daughter that seemed to work for her was we would have a
> If a teen is used to the idea that she must be told what/when to learn, it's
> going to be a bit scary to have the idea thrown at her that SHE is now
> responsible for her own learning.
>
> Don't make her feel she's on her own, be her partner in this. Talk, talk,
> talk...about what she loves, what she would love to do (help her plan the
> PERFECT day) and show her that you are there to help her get where she needs
> to go. There is nothing worse than feeling like you're on your own with no
> idea of where to go.
"meeting" about every 2-3 weeks. We'd go out to a coffee place or something
and order frappacinos or whatever and we'd talk. We'd talk about what she was
interested in doing and learning. She would bring a notebook and write down
ideas and how she wanted to pursue them. She always had GREAT ideas, it was as
if she just needed a sounding board to get it clear in her mind. It was
something we both looked forward to. I would make some suggestions from time to
time, usually in keeping with her train of thought, but they were JUST
suggestions. I didn't do anything like evaluate or things like that.
Just an idea,
Jamye
cris
Chris said:
that SHE is now responsible for her own learning.
am!
Also, read _The Teenage Liberation Handbook_ together. Talk about
freedom, and her "responsibility" to be the best "herself" she can be.
namaste,
cris
> "I have a question. How would you go about explaining to a teen,who expects
> to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it isRen said: > Gently....very gently.
> their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?"
>
> If a teen is used to the idea that she must be told what/when tolearn, it's going to be a bit scary to have the idea thrown at her
that SHE is now responsible for her own learning.
> Don't make her feel she's on her own, be her partner in this...Ren said what I was about to say, only she's waaay more poetic than I
am!
Also, read _The Teenage Liberation Handbook_ together. Talk about
freedom, and her "responsibility" to be the best "herself" she can be.
namaste,
cris
Deb Lewis
*** How would you go about explaining to a teen, who expects
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?***
I wouldn't. If a person has come to believe, through public schooling or
school at home, that learning is something must be imparted by a teacher
- someone trained - an expert, it could be very intimidating to be told
"learning" is now their responsibility. I wouldn't talk about it in
those terms at all.
I would talk about my own developing ideas about learning. I would
explore with that person, my new view of learning and teaching and the
value of self discovery. I would try to find examples of people who
pursued a passion and ended up doing the things they love. I would talk
about the way humans learned before there was school. I would talk
about the fact that each child is born already suited to life as a human,
and will naturally be interested in the things humans are interested in.
I would try to let go of any expectation I might have that the person
needed to be making progress toward a goal. The stress of other people's
expectations of us, especially when we're young, can be stifling to
imagination and creativity and possibility. They might be making
progress in ways that aren't visible. They might be gaining self
confidence, adjusting to new freedom, exploring feelings, etc. I would
work at trusting their process.
I would offer to help them find the things they'd like to do. I'd be
sympathetic if they had trouble deciding. I would try to give them more
exposure to things they like and I'd take them to new and interesting
places.
I would not say the equivalent of "It's all up to you now." I think that
could be intimidating if someone had always believed they needed the help
of an expert in order to learn. They could feel unprepared and
unqualified.
Deb Lewis
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?***
I wouldn't. If a person has come to believe, through public schooling or
school at home, that learning is something must be imparted by a teacher
- someone trained - an expert, it could be very intimidating to be told
"learning" is now their responsibility. I wouldn't talk about it in
those terms at all.
I would talk about my own developing ideas about learning. I would
explore with that person, my new view of learning and teaching and the
value of self discovery. I would try to find examples of people who
pursued a passion and ended up doing the things they love. I would talk
about the way humans learned before there was school. I would talk
about the fact that each child is born already suited to life as a human,
and will naturally be interested in the things humans are interested in.
I would try to let go of any expectation I might have that the person
needed to be making progress toward a goal. The stress of other people's
expectations of us, especially when we're young, can be stifling to
imagination and creativity and possibility. They might be making
progress in ways that aren't visible. They might be gaining self
confidence, adjusting to new freedom, exploring feelings, etc. I would
work at trusting their process.
I would offer to help them find the things they'd like to do. I'd be
sympathetic if they had trouble deciding. I would try to give them more
exposure to things they like and I'd take them to new and interesting
places.
I would not say the equivalent of "It's all up to you now." I think that
could be intimidating if someone had always believed they needed the help
of an expert in order to learn. They could feel unprepared and
unqualified.
Deb Lewis
[email protected]
In a message dated 6/27/2004 1:47:20 AM Eastern Standard Time,
[email protected] writes:
*** How would you go about explaining to a teen, who expects
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?***
*****************************
I wouldn't exactly do that either. What I'd probably ask is, "If you had all
the time and resources you needed, what would you do? What would you learn
about?"
I'd listen, maybe even take notes if it would help get it all. Then I'd say,
"I'll help you, if you like."
As adults we have resources and experiences that our kids and teens don't
have. We can drive. We have money. We know more people and know more about what's
in the world. We can be a major resource for our kids.
Barbara Sher is going to one of the speakers at the Live and Learn
Unschooling conference. Her book, Wishcraft, has influenced my own unschooling journey
more than any other, and it's not a book about unschooling.
Here is an excerpt from the book (available online and free, by the way, at
http://wishcraft.com/) that made me an unschooling mama (although I didn't know
it at the time):
That means when you came in at the age of 7 and said, “Mama, I am going to be
a movie star,” she said, “You know, you might be good at that.” Then she got
out the Super-8, let you put on her makeup, took a movie of you, let you see
it, and showed you and your best friend how to use the camera. And two days or
two months later, when you announced, “I’m given up my career as an actress.
I’ve decided to be a fireman and rescue people, “ she said, “Sounds good to
me. Want to go over to the firehouse and look at the engines?” The key word is
explore. Childhood is a great time for trying out all the myriad
possibilities of your being. (Adulthood isn’t a bad time for doing that either, as you’ll
find out as we go along.) And taking a child’s talents and interests “
seriously” does not mean expecting a 7-year-old to choose her lifetime career.<<
Even if you just read that one chapter of Barbara's book, it can change
everything.
Kathryn
Come to the Live and Learn Unschooling Conference August 27-29 in Peabody, MA!
For more information, go to www.LiveandLearnConference.org
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected] writes:
*** How would you go about explaining to a teen, who expects
to be taught, that the reigns are being turned over to them? That it is
their responsibility to learn, not your responsibility to teach them?***
*****************************
I wouldn't exactly do that either. What I'd probably ask is, "If you had all
the time and resources you needed, what would you do? What would you learn
about?"
I'd listen, maybe even take notes if it would help get it all. Then I'd say,
"I'll help you, if you like."
As adults we have resources and experiences that our kids and teens don't
have. We can drive. We have money. We know more people and know more about what's
in the world. We can be a major resource for our kids.
Barbara Sher is going to one of the speakers at the Live and Learn
Unschooling conference. Her book, Wishcraft, has influenced my own unschooling journey
more than any other, and it's not a book about unschooling.
Here is an excerpt from the book (available online and free, by the way, at
http://wishcraft.com/) that made me an unschooling mama (although I didn't know
it at the time):
>>4. Were you encouraged to explore all your own talents and interests evenif they changed from day to day?
That means when you came in at the age of 7 and said, “Mama, I am going to be
a movie star,” she said, “You know, you might be good at that.” Then she got
out the Super-8, let you put on her makeup, took a movie of you, let you see
it, and showed you and your best friend how to use the camera. And two days or
two months later, when you announced, “I’m given up my career as an actress.
I’ve decided to be a fireman and rescue people, “ she said, “Sounds good to
me. Want to go over to the firehouse and look at the engines?” The key word is
explore. Childhood is a great time for trying out all the myriad
possibilities of your being. (Adulthood isn’t a bad time for doing that either, as you’ll
find out as we go along.) And taking a child’s talents and interests “
seriously” does not mean expecting a 7-year-old to choose her lifetime career.<<
Even if you just read that one chapter of Barbara's book, it can change
everything.
Kathryn
Come to the Live and Learn Unschooling Conference August 27-29 in Peabody, MA!
For more information, go to www.LiveandLearnConference.org
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
sandrewmama
Dear Ren, Jamye, Cris, Deb, and Kathryn:
Thank you very much for your responses to my question about handing over the
reigns to a teen. You've given me a lot to consider.
I'd love to hear stories of anyone else who has experienced this transition.
Chris
Thank you very much for your responses to my question about handing over the
reigns to a teen. You've given me a lot to consider.
I'd love to hear stories of anyone else who has experienced this transition.
Chris