Mindful parenting
Ren Allen
"The discussion between Ren and Sandra Dodd made me realize
that I NEED to attend the conference. I will definitely be ordering a
few of the CD's from the 2005 conference!"
I'm SO glad it inspired you to make plans for attending. The
conference is truly a life changing experience for so many of us.
The handbook talk you gave the link for, is more about the healing
benefits of unschooling, while the CD talk is actually about mindful
parenting....just to avoid confusion if anyone else visits that link.:)
Kelly would love to have you all buy CD's!! You can also get an MP3 of
all the talks for only $75, and it will play on your computer (it's a
CD disc in MP3 format, won't play on a CD player, but computers work
fine).
Oh, and there is a conference email list for any of you that want to
stay informed: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/LiveandLearnConference/
The website will be updated soon, I've been told:
LiveandLearnConference.org.
And it will take place in NM, not AZ! Minor difference for those of us
traveling from TN.:)
Ren
that I NEED to attend the conference. I will definitely be ordering a
few of the CD's from the 2005 conference!"
I'm SO glad it inspired you to make plans for attending. The
conference is truly a life changing experience for so many of us.
The handbook talk you gave the link for, is more about the healing
benefits of unschooling, while the CD talk is actually about mindful
parenting....just to avoid confusion if anyone else visits that link.:)
Kelly would love to have you all buy CD's!! You can also get an MP3 of
all the talks for only $75, and it will play on your computer (it's a
CD disc in MP3 format, won't play on a CD player, but computers work
fine).
Oh, and there is a conference email list for any of you that want to
stay informed: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/LiveandLearnConference/
The website will be updated soon, I've been told:
LiveandLearnConference.org.
And it will take place in NM, not AZ! Minor difference for those of us
traveling from TN.:)
Ren
Mother Earth (Tyra)
Ren,
I just want to go to AZ, so I thought I would just move the conference their with me! LOL! Thank you for the correction because I would have been working on going to AZ. What part of NM will the conference be in? Thank you for the link. I will join the group to stay abreast of conference news.
Peace and Thanks!
Tyra
And it will take place in NM, not AZ! Minor difference for those of us
traveling from TN.:)
Ren
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I just want to go to AZ, so I thought I would just move the conference their with me! LOL! Thank you for the correction because I would have been working on going to AZ. What part of NM will the conference be in? Thank you for the link. I will join the group to stay abreast of conference news.
Peace and Thanks!
Tyra
And it will take place in NM, not AZ! Minor difference for those of us
traveling from TN.:)
Ren
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
multimomma
quote:
Gradually, freedom for the children creates a new looseness in the parents, though. And as
one increases, the other does too. When a parent hits a hard spot, where they feel jealousy
and resentment, it's often a sign that there's a painful childhood memory that hasn't been
laid out to dry yet.
unquote
What a wonderful way to put it! In actuality, I think that's what drew me to homeschooling,
was I could feel that all of our closeness was disappearing, the stress over school was so high
that it was hard to cope with dealing with emotions, trying to address the kids needs as well
as mine while dealing with school. All I wanted to was to pull back out of society for a while,
reattach to my family, and feel the love again! the homeschooling wasn't working well, again,
too much stress in trying to do everything I thought should be done. I suddenly became
aware that not only my kids needed to decompress, I needed to as well! and that's what I'm
working on...the negativity, the whole "why not?"
thanks for posting the link, I don't know what I'd do without the support and knowledge base
here, muddle through somehow, but feeling lonely and unsure.
Melissa
Gradually, freedom for the children creates a new looseness in the parents, though. And as
one increases, the other does too. When a parent hits a hard spot, where they feel jealousy
and resentment, it's often a sign that there's a painful childhood memory that hasn't been
laid out to dry yet.
unquote
What a wonderful way to put it! In actuality, I think that's what drew me to homeschooling,
was I could feel that all of our closeness was disappearing, the stress over school was so high
that it was hard to cope with dealing with emotions, trying to address the kids needs as well
as mine while dealing with school. All I wanted to was to pull back out of society for a while,
reattach to my family, and feel the love again! the homeschooling wasn't working well, again,
too much stress in trying to do everything I thought should be done. I suddenly became
aware that not only my kids needed to decompress, I needed to as well! and that's what I'm
working on...the negativity, the whole "why not?"
thanks for posting the link, I don't know what I'd do without the support and knowledge base
here, muddle through somehow, but feeling lonely and unsure.
Melissa
[email protected]
quote:
Gradually, freedom for the children creates a new looseness in the parents,
though. And as
one increases, the other does too. When a parent hits a hard spot, where
they feel jealousy
and resentment, it's often a sign that there's a painful childhood memory
that hasn't been
laid out to dry yet.
unquote
****************
In reference to the other thread about husbands not getting on board with
the program, I was thinking that perhaps this is one of the reasons our
reluctant partners can get stuck on aspects of unschooling/mindful parenting. They
are either not willing or not able to get around that painful childhood
memory.
In Unconditional Parenting, Alfie Kohn discusses that we often parent as our
parents did because to be "better" would be disrespectful. I don't remember
if he says this, but I also think we have that inner child that NEEDS his
parents to be perfect. So by parenting "better" we expose a part of ourselves
that is a lie. Very painful. I need to unearth that book and get an exact
quote.
Oh, and excellent job, Ren (and Sandra). Forgot to say that before.
Leslie in SC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Gradually, freedom for the children creates a new looseness in the parents,
though. And as
one increases, the other does too. When a parent hits a hard spot, where
they feel jealousy
and resentment, it's often a sign that there's a painful childhood memory
that hasn't been
laid out to dry yet.
unquote
****************
In reference to the other thread about husbands not getting on board with
the program, I was thinking that perhaps this is one of the reasons our
reluctant partners can get stuck on aspects of unschooling/mindful parenting. They
are either not willing or not able to get around that painful childhood
memory.
In Unconditional Parenting, Alfie Kohn discusses that we often parent as our
parents did because to be "better" would be disrespectful. I don't remember
if he says this, but I also think we have that inner child that NEEDS his
parents to be perfect. So by parenting "better" we expose a part of ourselves
that is a lie. Very painful. I need to unearth that book and get an exact
quote.
Oh, and excellent job, Ren (and Sandra). Forgot to say that before.
Leslie in SC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Deb
--- In [email protected], "multimomma"
<autismhelp@c...> wrote:
feels so good to him to be able to say Yes, let's get that, do that,
try that, explore this, etc to DS when his growing up was all
about "do extra chores/get good grades/wait for your birthday or
holidays to earn this or get that", "no you can't do that it's
silly", "That's a waste of time/money" etc. He's even admitted to
feeling a little jealous at times of the freedom DS has to grow and
Be. Which is when I try to remember to encourage him to let that
part of himself Be free and do things too. He's getting to do now
all those things he wished he could do then - and having a great
time!
--Deb
<autismhelp@c...> wrote:
>I've seen this so vividly with DH (we've talked about it) - how it
> quote:
> Gradually, freedom for the children creates a new looseness in the
>parents, though. And as
> one increases, the other does too. When a parent hits a hard spot,
>where they feel jealousy
> and resentment, it's often a sign that there's a painful childhood
>memory that hasn't been
> laid out to dry yet.
> unquote
feels so good to him to be able to say Yes, let's get that, do that,
try that, explore this, etc to DS when his growing up was all
about "do extra chores/get good grades/wait for your birthday or
holidays to earn this or get that", "no you can't do that it's
silly", "That's a waste of time/money" etc. He's even admitted to
feeling a little jealous at times of the freedom DS has to grow and
Be. Which is when I try to remember to encourage him to let that
part of himself Be free and do things too. He's getting to do now
all those things he wished he could do then - and having a great
time!
--Deb
multimomma
--- In [email protected], Leslie530@a... wrote:
(my mother was horribly abusive, and neglectful). My husband on the other hand, honestly
sees nothing wrong with his childhood, regardless of the fact that his sister has shared some
of it with me. We're both the oldest child enablers of manipulative, obsessive-compulsive,
and domineering women, and mild-mannered, intellectual fathers who probably saved our id
and ego.
Gotta go, lunch is over!
Melissa
> In reference to the other thread about husbands not getting on board withInteresting point. I want desperately to get around the memories, I've buried them too long
> the program, I was thinking that perhaps this is one of the reasons our
> reluctant partners can get stuck on aspects of unschooling/mindful parenting. They
> are either not willing or not able to get around that painful childhood
> memory.
(my mother was horribly abusive, and neglectful). My husband on the other hand, honestly
sees nothing wrong with his childhood, regardless of the fact that his sister has shared some
of it with me. We're both the oldest child enablers of manipulative, obsessive-compulsive,
and domineering women, and mild-mannered, intellectual fathers who probably saved our id
and ego.
Gotta go, lunch is over!
Melissa