Now what
Ren Allen
"Also, I'm going to start re-reading all
my books on unschooling that I have now that we are through the de-
schooling stage."
She's not done deschooling.
Deschooling means you see that you can learn from anything and
everything, it means the school is mostly out of your head. It's not
for her yet.
That's ok....she is where she is. But the fact that she wants you to
tell her what to "study" is a sure sign that she's still deschooling.
Once a child de-schools, they are interested in things that make
them happy, they aren't needing someone to tell them what to do
(though they may need a lot of help with ideas, or finding new
places, people and things etc...).
I'd continue acting as though it's summer vacation. Point out the
things she's learned so far and help her channel her interests. Tell
her you are uncomfortable telling her what to "study" but more than
happy to bring new materials and experiences into her life.:)
Ren
my books on unschooling that I have now that we are through the de-
schooling stage."
She's not done deschooling.
Deschooling means you see that you can learn from anything and
everything, it means the school is mostly out of your head. It's not
for her yet.
That's ok....she is where she is. But the fact that she wants you to
tell her what to "study" is a sure sign that she's still deschooling.
Once a child de-schools, they are interested in things that make
them happy, they aren't needing someone to tell them what to do
(though they may need a lot of help with ideas, or finding new
places, people and things etc...).
I'd continue acting as though it's summer vacation. Point out the
things she's learned so far and help her channel her interests. Tell
her you are uncomfortable telling her what to "study" but more than
happy to bring new materials and experiences into her life.:)
Ren
nrskay
Thanks Ren. I thought because she was becoming interested in learning
she was through the stage of deschooling. I guess I need to be a bit
more patient with her.
We talked a little more about it yesterday. I pointed out to her that
she is learning all the time. I asked her if she was comparing
herself to her homeschooled and schooled friends and she
replied "maybe". I explained that they are learning things just to
pass a test and then they will probably forget it and move on the next
test. She seemed to be ok with that explanation.
She has periods where I do see some changes going on. We are playing
more games together, last night she beat me at chess again, we baked
cookies together in the afternoon, stuff like that. Before our change
in lifestyle of rad-unschooling, she rarely wanted to do stuff with
me. We weren't close, I was a controlling and demanding type of mom
with lots of stupid rules. Now that I have changed, she likes being
around me, she evens tells me that I'm cool now. I love that we have
grown close.
Kay
she was through the stage of deschooling. I guess I need to be a bit
more patient with her.
We talked a little more about it yesterday. I pointed out to her that
she is learning all the time. I asked her if she was comparing
herself to her homeschooled and schooled friends and she
replied "maybe". I explained that they are learning things just to
pass a test and then they will probably forget it and move on the next
test. She seemed to be ok with that explanation.
She has periods where I do see some changes going on. We are playing
more games together, last night she beat me at chess again, we baked
cookies together in the afternoon, stuff like that. Before our change
in lifestyle of rad-unschooling, she rarely wanted to do stuff with
me. We weren't close, I was a controlling and demanding type of mom
with lots of stupid rules. Now that I have changed, she likes being
around me, she evens tells me that I'm cool now. I love that we have
grown close.
Kay
Ren Allen
" Now that I have changed, she likes being
around me, she evens tells me that I'm cool now. I love that we have
grown close."
This is HUGE! Unschooling really can't unfold the way we all describe
it until there is healing in the relationships. The parent-child
relationship is absolutely crucial here. So definitely be patient with
her, the rest will fall into place. She LIKES being around you, the
learning and deschooling stuff is secondary to that! Very cool.
Ren
around me, she evens tells me that I'm cool now. I love that we have
grown close."
This is HUGE! Unschooling really can't unfold the way we all describe
it until there is healing in the relationships. The parent-child
relationship is absolutely crucial here. So definitely be patient with
her, the rest will fall into place. She LIKES being around you, the
learning and deschooling stuff is secondary to that! Very cool.
Ren