Just Sharing a Positive Unschooling Day...this is long
Donald and Sandra Winn
I want you all to know that I'm taking everything that
you've said in and it means so much to me that you are
offering such wonderful advice. In time, I hope to be
able to offer encouragement and advice as well. What
you all told me about my son and such, it really hit
me hard because I know that I and my husband are the
reason behind "what WE see as a problem", considering
our parenting of him for 11 years and being critical
and stealing his joy, we shouldn't be surprised. What
kind of life is it for him to be concerned about
messing up because mom and dad may make a callous
remark? Is it any wonder that he involves himself in
tv so much, when that is his only safe haven?
Although video games have much learning, is it really
great if the "main" reason he plays is because he can
do so without being scorned for a mistake? Seeing
things through his eyes and through the eyes of
unschoolers gives me a whole new outlook.
I cried yesterday while we were playing our card game
because he spoke about playing Poke'mon over six years
ago. I took those away from him because I THOUGHT, at
the time that they were bad and evil. When he was
teaching me the game described below, his eyes lit up
when talking about how he knew how to do this because
of Poke'mon. I told him how sorry I was for taking
those cards away and making him feel bad for playing
them. He told me it was okay, I still feel so
terrible about it. What an awful parent,
self-loathing pretty much describes how I feel about
myself back then, I wish I could take it back.
Anyway, here is my journal entry for yesterday and me
seeing things through his eyes and through the eyes of
an unschooler...................
______________________________________________________
Joyful
October 24, 2005
Today was one of those days where you just wish for a
second that it could be recorded and put on an
unbreakable memory disc. It was perfect; beautiful
weather (sunny, cool, breezy) and although I LOVE
clouds, there wasn't one in the sky, just blue as far
as the eye could see.
Our morning started off joyful, which is something I
desire for each and everyday. We had a small but
filling breakfast and did some minor housework.
Brooke was anxious to go to her friends Kasey's at 10
am and I was looking forward to spending some quality
time getting to know my son. Once we got one
obstinate bird back into his cage, we were off to
Kasey's. Brooke was so excited, she loves her friend
so much. On the way there she said that she would
miss us, I was like, "Yeah, right!" HAHA We dropped
her off and then Zak and I stopped at the store to
pick up a few lunch items and went home.
Donnie arrived for lunch just slightly after 11. He,
Zak and I laid on the bed together and just talked.
We had the birds out so we had some laughs as they
jumped from one of us to the next, pecked around,
bickered and sang. Those birds, Melvin and Gloria,
have us in stitches on a DAILY BASIS! After that, it
was time for Donnie to go back to work. Now Zak and I
had several hours in which to just be.
We went outside and played with the basketball and
played the games; h-o-r-s-e-s-h-o-e, around the World,
and one on one. Then we fiddled around while
dribbling and we laughed together when we made an
amusing shot, did the big sport event music, it was
just awesome.
After we got pooped out from basketball we came in for
awhile and I did the lunch dishes and Zak watched some
television. The mail came early today and boy did
that bring in some added joy. Several weeks ago I had
ordered Weird "n" Wild Creatures . It is a
subscription in which every 3 weeks, you receive
trading/game cards with animals under several
different titles such as "Of the Deep", "Small
Terrors", "Of the Mind (mythical creatures), etc.
Also included are these gorgeous, colorful, full cards
to go in a nice index box that are packed with little
tid-bits including; geography, characteristics,
dangers, class, etc. of each animal. On each trading
card there are points for Defense and Attack, Zachary
then taught me how to play, because over 5 years ago
he did the same type of thing with Poke'mon cards.
For instance, T-Rex has an Attack:10 and Defense is 8.
The Great White Shark has an Attack:8, Defense: 7.
If Zak laid down T-Rex, I would lose because his
attack is stronger than my defense and my Great White
would not have any life left. It get's more complex
than that and it took awhile for me to understand. I
did not realize all the math and memorization that
goes into these games. Anyway, we played and had more
laughs and more fun.
It was now about 3 and I had asked Zak earlier if he
wanted to cook dinner, he said, "Yes!" Zak has my
coordination but you have to learn sometime, right?
HAHA Dinner was to be Chicken 'n' Dumplins, Zaks
favorite meal. He did the whole meal on his own and
it was the best that I'd ever had. I told him what
goes in, boiling techniques, and let him play with
spices but only because he had never made it before,
he did all the cut-ups, dumping and even estimated how
much water he'd need to cover the vegetables. Zak is
a visual learner and also learns best by doing, I have
no doubt that he would be able to make this meal with
paper direction and/or no directions next time because
his memory (when something is REAL to him) is like
that of an elephant. Donnie loved this meal prepared
by our son also. We sat down together and gobbled up
Zak's delicious meal, while telling silly Mom and Dad
"love" stories and also that of Grandpa Buster and
Grandma Marian.... Those are the best kinds of
dinners. Afterwards, Zak went the Weird 'n' Wild
Creatures website and learned about Giant
Caterpillars, I hope I never run into one of those
things! Donnie fiddled around on his guitar.
After I finished with dishes it was time to go and
meet for coffee with Betsy. Kasey's art teacher said
that it was okay if Brooke stayed and so that is why I
was fortunate for this little "Ladies Night Out"
LOL... Betsy and I had a nice time together and also
had a great conversation. We then went to the Art
Studio to pick up the kids and part ways for the
night. Miss Diane had let Brooke paint (for free) a
couple of things, that was an added treat for the day.
On the way home Brooke went on and on and on about
all the fun she had had at her friends house. They
played on bikes, the trampoline, dress up, play acting
with acts, drawing cards and taking them to the
neighbors, visiting Kasey's Grandma, etc., etc. and
she pointed out that they didn't watch any TV. She
wore me out just talking about her day. That she had
a joyful day, added to the overall happiness. When
Donnie asked Brooke later, "So what did you do all
day..." She happily but firmly, "Dad, I had a great
time but I don't feel like repeating everything again
and I can't remember everything because we did so
much!" ROFLMBO...kids are something else!
When we arrived home, Donnie and Zak were playing an
intense game of the SpongeBob Squarepants version of
Life. As usual, Zak won another board game. I don't
know what it is with this kid but he wins these things
all the time. While they finished that I showed
Brooke that our Creature Cards had arrived, she was
into that in no time. Then Brooke decided that she
wanted to play the "War" version of the Creature Cards
with daddy so, they did. After that, I had to play
her and Zak taught us the super fun way to do it...
Raise your card high in the air and in a big way
pronounce (for instance) "T-Rex, attack!" Slam the
card on the table and slide it over to the opponents,
who has done the same thing. I must say that that
truly was a super fun version!
The day was winding down and I grabbed a snack and
went out to watch the Science channel with Donnie.
The kids played their creature cards and after that
they were glued to looking at the info cards. Later
the kids brushed their teeth and went to bed. What a
great day, what great memories, I'm looking forward to
tomorrow.
Peace and Joy,
~Sandy
www.homelearningnaturally.blogspot.com
__________________________________
Yahoo! FareChase: Search multiple travel sites in one click.
http://farechase.yahoo.com
you've said in and it means so much to me that you are
offering such wonderful advice. In time, I hope to be
able to offer encouragement and advice as well. What
you all told me about my son and such, it really hit
me hard because I know that I and my husband are the
reason behind "what WE see as a problem", considering
our parenting of him for 11 years and being critical
and stealing his joy, we shouldn't be surprised. What
kind of life is it for him to be concerned about
messing up because mom and dad may make a callous
remark? Is it any wonder that he involves himself in
tv so much, when that is his only safe haven?
Although video games have much learning, is it really
great if the "main" reason he plays is because he can
do so without being scorned for a mistake? Seeing
things through his eyes and through the eyes of
unschoolers gives me a whole new outlook.
I cried yesterday while we were playing our card game
because he spoke about playing Poke'mon over six years
ago. I took those away from him because I THOUGHT, at
the time that they were bad and evil. When he was
teaching me the game described below, his eyes lit up
when talking about how he knew how to do this because
of Poke'mon. I told him how sorry I was for taking
those cards away and making him feel bad for playing
them. He told me it was okay, I still feel so
terrible about it. What an awful parent,
self-loathing pretty much describes how I feel about
myself back then, I wish I could take it back.
Anyway, here is my journal entry for yesterday and me
seeing things through his eyes and through the eyes of
an unschooler...................
______________________________________________________
Joyful
October 24, 2005
Today was one of those days where you just wish for a
second that it could be recorded and put on an
unbreakable memory disc. It was perfect; beautiful
weather (sunny, cool, breezy) and although I LOVE
clouds, there wasn't one in the sky, just blue as far
as the eye could see.
Our morning started off joyful, which is something I
desire for each and everyday. We had a small but
filling breakfast and did some minor housework.
Brooke was anxious to go to her friends Kasey's at 10
am and I was looking forward to spending some quality
time getting to know my son. Once we got one
obstinate bird back into his cage, we were off to
Kasey's. Brooke was so excited, she loves her friend
so much. On the way there she said that she would
miss us, I was like, "Yeah, right!" HAHA We dropped
her off and then Zak and I stopped at the store to
pick up a few lunch items and went home.
Donnie arrived for lunch just slightly after 11. He,
Zak and I laid on the bed together and just talked.
We had the birds out so we had some laughs as they
jumped from one of us to the next, pecked around,
bickered and sang. Those birds, Melvin and Gloria,
have us in stitches on a DAILY BASIS! After that, it
was time for Donnie to go back to work. Now Zak and I
had several hours in which to just be.
We went outside and played with the basketball and
played the games; h-o-r-s-e-s-h-o-e, around the World,
and one on one. Then we fiddled around while
dribbling and we laughed together when we made an
amusing shot, did the big sport event music, it was
just awesome.
After we got pooped out from basketball we came in for
awhile and I did the lunch dishes and Zak watched some
television. The mail came early today and boy did
that bring in some added joy. Several weeks ago I had
ordered Weird "n" Wild Creatures . It is a
subscription in which every 3 weeks, you receive
trading/game cards with animals under several
different titles such as "Of the Deep", "Small
Terrors", "Of the Mind (mythical creatures), etc.
Also included are these gorgeous, colorful, full cards
to go in a nice index box that are packed with little
tid-bits including; geography, characteristics,
dangers, class, etc. of each animal. On each trading
card there are points for Defense and Attack, Zachary
then taught me how to play, because over 5 years ago
he did the same type of thing with Poke'mon cards.
For instance, T-Rex has an Attack:10 and Defense is 8.
The Great White Shark has an Attack:8, Defense: 7.
If Zak laid down T-Rex, I would lose because his
attack is stronger than my defense and my Great White
would not have any life left. It get's more complex
than that and it took awhile for me to understand. I
did not realize all the math and memorization that
goes into these games. Anyway, we played and had more
laughs and more fun.
It was now about 3 and I had asked Zak earlier if he
wanted to cook dinner, he said, "Yes!" Zak has my
coordination but you have to learn sometime, right?
HAHA Dinner was to be Chicken 'n' Dumplins, Zaks
favorite meal. He did the whole meal on his own and
it was the best that I'd ever had. I told him what
goes in, boiling techniques, and let him play with
spices but only because he had never made it before,
he did all the cut-ups, dumping and even estimated how
much water he'd need to cover the vegetables. Zak is
a visual learner and also learns best by doing, I have
no doubt that he would be able to make this meal with
paper direction and/or no directions next time because
his memory (when something is REAL to him) is like
that of an elephant. Donnie loved this meal prepared
by our son also. We sat down together and gobbled up
Zak's delicious meal, while telling silly Mom and Dad
"love" stories and also that of Grandpa Buster and
Grandma Marian.... Those are the best kinds of
dinners. Afterwards, Zak went the Weird 'n' Wild
Creatures website and learned about Giant
Caterpillars, I hope I never run into one of those
things! Donnie fiddled around on his guitar.
After I finished with dishes it was time to go and
meet for coffee with Betsy. Kasey's art teacher said
that it was okay if Brooke stayed and so that is why I
was fortunate for this little "Ladies Night Out"
LOL... Betsy and I had a nice time together and also
had a great conversation. We then went to the Art
Studio to pick up the kids and part ways for the
night. Miss Diane had let Brooke paint (for free) a
couple of things, that was an added treat for the day.
On the way home Brooke went on and on and on about
all the fun she had had at her friends house. They
played on bikes, the trampoline, dress up, play acting
with acts, drawing cards and taking them to the
neighbors, visiting Kasey's Grandma, etc., etc. and
she pointed out that they didn't watch any TV. She
wore me out just talking about her day. That she had
a joyful day, added to the overall happiness. When
Donnie asked Brooke later, "So what did you do all
day..." She happily but firmly, "Dad, I had a great
time but I don't feel like repeating everything again
and I can't remember everything because we did so
much!" ROFLMBO...kids are something else!
When we arrived home, Donnie and Zak were playing an
intense game of the SpongeBob Squarepants version of
Life. As usual, Zak won another board game. I don't
know what it is with this kid but he wins these things
all the time. While they finished that I showed
Brooke that our Creature Cards had arrived, she was
into that in no time. Then Brooke decided that she
wanted to play the "War" version of the Creature Cards
with daddy so, they did. After that, I had to play
her and Zak taught us the super fun way to do it...
Raise your card high in the air and in a big way
pronounce (for instance) "T-Rex, attack!" Slam the
card on the table and slide it over to the opponents,
who has done the same thing. I must say that that
truly was a super fun version!
The day was winding down and I grabbed a snack and
went out to watch the Science channel with Donnie.
The kids played their creature cards and after that
they were glued to looking at the info cards. Later
the kids brushed their teeth and went to bed. What a
great day, what great memories, I'm looking forward to
tomorrow.
Peace and Joy,
~Sandy
www.homelearningnaturally.blogspot.com
__________________________________
Yahoo! FareChase: Search multiple travel sites in one click.
http://farechase.yahoo.com
[email protected]
Thanks for sharing your wonderful day. It was such a great way to start *my* day by reading about someone else's gentle journey.
myself back then, I wish I could take it back.>>
Don't hold on to those feelings. That moment is gone. Isn't it wonderful that you have NOW to be the parent you wish you were then.
--
~Mary
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>>What an awful parent,self-loathing pretty much describes how I feel about
myself back then, I wish I could take it back.>>
Don't hold on to those feelings. That moment is gone. Isn't it wonderful that you have NOW to be the parent you wish you were then.
--
~Mary
"The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the
green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly
alive."
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Thanks for sharing, Sandy. It makes you wonder why everyone doesn't live
this way. :)
By the way, we have started getting the Weird and Wild Animal cards, too.
My son LOVES them.
Have another great day!
Leslie in SC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
this way. :)
By the way, we have started getting the Weird and Wild Animal cards, too.
My son LOVES them.
Have another great day!
Leslie in SC
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]