Re: [Norton AntiSpam] Re: [unschoolingbasics] Getting tired!
joanne
Hi Julie, Is that he may not be ready until he is older, his answer or my answer? What if we dont' agree? Joanne
I would not give in on me being in bed asleep. It is quite possible that he simply isn't ready to be up by himself and the answer is that he will choose try it when he is older.
Julie S.
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I would not give in on me being in bed asleep. It is quite possible that he simply isn't ready to be up by himself and the answer is that he will choose try it when he is older.
Julie S.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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<<What if we don't agree?>>
There are going to be times when it takes time to figure out an answer everyone can live with. But the fact that you don't agree doesn't mean that you have to give up your need (sleep)for his want (to stay up with company). You might tell him that you are asking other people trying to come up with ideas so this will work but in the mean time, you need to sleep. You might be willing to stay up with him a couple of nights per week. He might be willing to play quietly a couple of nights per week.
But unschooling doesn't mean that you don't get your needs met. It means that you are willing to keep an open mind, to try to figure out ways so everyone is happy, but sometimes people just have to "deal with it" for a bit while you try to figure it out.
What if your dh wanted to stay up watching tv everynight and felt left out if you went to bed? Would you stay up everynight and be exhausted or would you try to find a solution you were both happy with?
i think when dealing with kids, we want so much for them to be happy that we sometimes get blurry boundaries, get things mixed up over what is "his stuff" and what is "our stuff". You needing to get sleep is "your stuff". Him wanting to stay up is "his stuff". Him wanting you to stay up with him is a boundary between the two. It affects you both. Hopefully, you can find a win-win solution.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
There are going to be times when it takes time to figure out an answer everyone can live with. But the fact that you don't agree doesn't mean that you have to give up your need (sleep)for his want (to stay up with company). You might tell him that you are asking other people trying to come up with ideas so this will work but in the mean time, you need to sleep. You might be willing to stay up with him a couple of nights per week. He might be willing to play quietly a couple of nights per week.
But unschooling doesn't mean that you don't get your needs met. It means that you are willing to keep an open mind, to try to figure out ways so everyone is happy, but sometimes people just have to "deal with it" for a bit while you try to figure it out.
What if your dh wanted to stay up watching tv everynight and felt left out if you went to bed? Would you stay up everynight and be exhausted or would you try to find a solution you were both happy with?
i think when dealing with kids, we want so much for them to be happy that we sometimes get blurry boundaries, get things mixed up over what is "his stuff" and what is "our stuff". You needing to get sleep is "your stuff". Him wanting to stay up is "his stuff". Him wanting you to stay up with him is a boundary between the two. It affects you both. Hopefully, you can find a win-win solution.
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joanne
Thanks Mary :) Joanne
I don't think you need to change all of his habits all at once. And you don't need to give up your right to sleep for his right to choose to stay awake. It's all about balance. So you could remove the "you must be in bed by 8:00" part while still not leaving it open for him to challenge himself to stay awake as late as he can. We had routines instead of rules and that seemed to work very well.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
I don't think you need to change all of his habits all at once. And you don't need to give up your right to sleep for his right to choose to stay awake. It's all about balance. So you could remove the "you must be in bed by 8:00" part while still not leaving it open for him to challenge himself to stay awake as late as he can. We had routines instead of rules and that seemed to work very well.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]