Sleep thoughts
Cornelia
Hi,
I would love some imput - thoughts and ideas about sleep. Our 3 1/2 year old needs nine hours sleep a day, including any naps. This is his rhythm, so I'm not looking to try to interfere with that, more looking for strategies for my fatigue, and DH's. We have a little three month old too, she seems to be the opposite in terms of sleep ie sleeps loads, but it's still tiring, though I was actually more tired when I was pregnant than now, surprisingly.
Yesterday, for example, DS was up at 9am, had a nap from 4-6pm-ish, and finally fell asleep at just gone 2am which is exactly predictable according to his pattern timewise. The only thing we do is to usually (though not always) try to entice him to not nap longer than about two hours, as we've let the naps play out fully and ended up being awake from say midnight to 6 or 7am, after five or six hours of nap. He doesn't seem overtired at all, and lots of physical activity doesn't change his length of day or night's sleep, so I think he is really fine, it's just us (parents) who need a few ideas of how to make it through a fifteen hour day of intense present loving parenting while managing to keep our energy and also keep from getting overwhelmed. I'm trying out some Bach's flower remedies - Hornbeam, Beech, Pine & Larch. Id welcome other suggestions. We have a few activities which are low key & often end the day with an hour plus of watching Mighty Machines, Bob the Builder or YouTube construction etc videos. Puzzles and Lego are popular and somewhat relaxing, as is a 'read-in'. He is just transitioning into playing without our imput 100%, and has begun setting up his train sets and construction projects himself too so I imagine we will get some downtime at some point in the next year or so. But meanwhile I wondered if any one else had had this experience, and if so, if they had any tips or advice - practical or emotional or therapeutic - ie herbal remedies or such for energy etc. I can't do caffeine at the moment due to bfeeding. Any thoughts will be welcome. I really don't want to get overtired and grumpy, but I do on occasion, and I would like to help sidestep that if at all possible.
With thanks,
Cornelia
I would love some imput - thoughts and ideas about sleep. Our 3 1/2 year old needs nine hours sleep a day, including any naps. This is his rhythm, so I'm not looking to try to interfere with that, more looking for strategies for my fatigue, and DH's. We have a little three month old too, she seems to be the opposite in terms of sleep ie sleeps loads, but it's still tiring, though I was actually more tired when I was pregnant than now, surprisingly.
Yesterday, for example, DS was up at 9am, had a nap from 4-6pm-ish, and finally fell asleep at just gone 2am which is exactly predictable according to his pattern timewise. The only thing we do is to usually (though not always) try to entice him to not nap longer than about two hours, as we've let the naps play out fully and ended up being awake from say midnight to 6 or 7am, after five or six hours of nap. He doesn't seem overtired at all, and lots of physical activity doesn't change his length of day or night's sleep, so I think he is really fine, it's just us (parents) who need a few ideas of how to make it through a fifteen hour day of intense present loving parenting while managing to keep our energy and also keep from getting overwhelmed. I'm trying out some Bach's flower remedies - Hornbeam, Beech, Pine & Larch. Id welcome other suggestions. We have a few activities which are low key & often end the day with an hour plus of watching Mighty Machines, Bob the Builder or YouTube construction etc videos. Puzzles and Lego are popular and somewhat relaxing, as is a 'read-in'. He is just transitioning into playing without our imput 100%, and has begun setting up his train sets and construction projects himself too so I imagine we will get some downtime at some point in the next year or so. But meanwhile I wondered if any one else had had this experience, and if so, if they had any tips or advice - practical or emotional or therapeutic - ie herbal remedies or such for energy etc. I can't do caffeine at the moment due to bfeeding. Any thoughts will be welcome. I really don't want to get overtired and grumpy, but I do on occasion, and I would like to help sidestep that if at all possible.
With thanks,
Cornelia
mari teaches
hmm, i also cant do caffeine, not because of bf-ing but its a migraine
trigger lol.
anywyas, my boys are ages 14, 10, 6, and 2 and they all still want much
playtime/talktime from us, well moreso me than dad. i suffer insomnia, and
also have high energy too, maybe im just so used to it..
my 14 yr old can entertain himself of course, but he loves to talk about
things with me and inside he talks me to sleep, but outside i never show it,
i completely engage in his stories and conversations. my 10 yr old isnt so
much a talker, unless its about music, arts, & cooking, so we do lots of
that together. now my other 2 ages 6 and 2 they really cant play by themself
too much yet, either they are so used to me playing with them, or idk, but
they always want me there, even just next to them while they play with
eachother, so they are usually near me, or me near them or me playing with
them.
for relaxing, i use some bath salts that say stress relieve, lavender,
calming salts we also spray this sensual pillow mist in the rooms to help us
all calm down, i spray it towards the fan, i bought that at bath & body
works. i also use decaf teas to help relax me if needed. but usually the
baths are just enough.
mine are awake from 7-8am right through10pm-12pm depends on their day, and
none take naps. and yes they are over tired and they do show it, so
sometimes i do need to tell them to find quiet activities(since they refuse
naps) to do separately because they are tired and are fighting because they
are tired.
--
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http://sprinkle-of-fun.blogspot.com/2010/12/cant-wait-cards-give-away_16.html
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Mari
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Independent Homeschoolers Network
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
trigger lol.
anywyas, my boys are ages 14, 10, 6, and 2 and they all still want much
playtime/talktime from us, well moreso me than dad. i suffer insomnia, and
also have high energy too, maybe im just so used to it..
my 14 yr old can entertain himself of course, but he loves to talk about
things with me and inside he talks me to sleep, but outside i never show it,
i completely engage in his stories and conversations. my 10 yr old isnt so
much a talker, unless its about music, arts, & cooking, so we do lots of
that together. now my other 2 ages 6 and 2 they really cant play by themself
too much yet, either they are so used to me playing with them, or idk, but
they always want me there, even just next to them while they play with
eachother, so they are usually near me, or me near them or me playing with
them.
for relaxing, i use some bath salts that say stress relieve, lavender,
calming salts we also spray this sensual pillow mist in the rooms to help us
all calm down, i spray it towards the fan, i bought that at bath & body
works. i also use decaf teas to help relax me if needed. but usually the
baths are just enough.
mine are awake from 7-8am right through10pm-12pm depends on their day, and
none take naps. and yes they are over tired and they do show it, so
sometimes i do need to tell them to find quiet activities(since they refuse
naps) to do separately because they are tired and are fighting because they
are tired.
--
http://sprinkle-of-fun.blogspot.com/2010/12/cleopatra-literary-contest.html
FREE Birthday cards
http://sprinkle-of-fun.blogspot.com/2010/12/cant-wait-cards-give-away_16.html
HOAC
http://sprinkle-of-fun.blogspot.com/2010/12/hands-of-child-give-away.html
FREE childrens Progress Cards
http://sprinkle-of-fun.blogspot.com/2010/12/progress-cards.html
Mari
President~ http://www.ihn-brevard.com
Independent Homeschoolers Network
http://www.sprinkle-of-fun.blogspot.com facebook/twitter on blog.
http://sprinkle-of-fun.blogspot.com/2010/10/i-can-home-school-how.html
http://www.childworkboxes.blogspot.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tamara Shand
Hi Cornelia,
I feel your pain! I only have one 3 1/2 year old but I also find my energy flagging after an intense day of playing.
I found magnesium supplements helped me a lot. That was easiest as I figured out how to get more of it in my diet. You may need to experiment with how like it best: greens (green smoothies, stir fried Kale, spinach and walnut pesto are some examples); nuts, halibut.
I'm told B vitamins may also help with energy levels. That's worth checking out since you are breastfeeding and sharing your nutrients with your baby.
All the best,
Tamara
I feel your pain! I only have one 3 1/2 year old but I also find my energy flagging after an intense day of playing.
I found magnesium supplements helped me a lot. That was easiest as I figured out how to get more of it in my diet. You may need to experiment with how like it best: greens (green smoothies, stir fried Kale, spinach and walnut pesto are some examples); nuts, halibut.
I'm told B vitamins may also help with energy levels. That's worth checking out since you are breastfeeding and sharing your nutrients with your baby.
All the best,
Tamara
plaidpanties666
"Cornelia" <corneliablik@...> wrote:
With a 3.5yo and a baby, you're going to be short on sleep. Its not uncommon for moms in your situation to feel closer to zombies than parents! Overtired is probably inevitable, and maybe grumpy, too. You can practice not acting on "grumpy" and work on shifting your focus to more positive thoughts when you're tired, but with two little kids, you *will* be tired on a regular basis.
Rather then hoping for some impossible ideal, look for ways to set yourself up so you can function when you're tired. That includes meeting your essential needs proactively and considering what sorts of things you need mental clarity for. For instance, I'm not a "night person" so I'd put some extra energy into setting myself up for a mellow evening. I'd make sure that by the time "dinner time" was over all I needed to do was be present for my kids. Any evening snacks were made, games and toys ready, movies lined up - so I didn't have to think, just respond.
---Meredith
> I really don't want to get overtired and grumpy, but I do on occasion, and I would like to help sidestep that if at all possible.*****************
With a 3.5yo and a baby, you're going to be short on sleep. Its not uncommon for moms in your situation to feel closer to zombies than parents! Overtired is probably inevitable, and maybe grumpy, too. You can practice not acting on "grumpy" and work on shifting your focus to more positive thoughts when you're tired, but with two little kids, you *will* be tired on a regular basis.
Rather then hoping for some impossible ideal, look for ways to set yourself up so you can function when you're tired. That includes meeting your essential needs proactively and considering what sorts of things you need mental clarity for. For instance, I'm not a "night person" so I'd put some extra energy into setting myself up for a mellow evening. I'd make sure that by the time "dinner time" was over all I needed to do was be present for my kids. Any evening snacks were made, games and toys ready, movies lined up - so I didn't have to think, just respond.
---Meredith
plaidpanties666
and yes they are over tired and they do show it, so
---Meredith
> sometimes i do need to tell them to find quiet activities(since they refuseWoops, sorry, did you mean the Kids were overtired and grumpy? That happens - its part of how they learn what "tired" means. It does help to set up mellower activities, even to create a settling down routine for some kids much like a conventional "bedtime" but without the focus on the clock.
> naps) to do separately because they are tired and are fighting because they
> are tired.
---Meredith
Cornelia
Ah no, the little ones are peachy!! It's just the parents who get overtired and grumpy! It may have not been terribly clear in my post.
Thank you to everyone on and off line who took the time to respond. I appreciate your input! I think for now my best bet is to drink more nettle tea (thank you, Tamara!) to stock up on vit B and magnesium as you suggested, plus I love drinking them and all that earthy greeness, i just let them slide a little since DD was born.
And maybe focus on a thought or phrase to help center myself during those early early hours when DS is asking me to construct a Lego Technic with him, so I can be present and revel in his lust for life, rather than thinking about the Sear's book average sleep quota for a toddler (or such) heh heh..!
I think that will help. He isn't quite at the stage when my presence alone is enough yet, but I imagine that will come soon enough, and then I'll miss it.
Thanks again to all who replied, and I'm still open to other thoughts about mellow activities and support for the parents - ie thank you to any future posters too.
Cornelia
Thank you to everyone on and off line who took the time to respond. I appreciate your input! I think for now my best bet is to drink more nettle tea (thank you, Tamara!) to stock up on vit B and magnesium as you suggested, plus I love drinking them and all that earthy greeness, i just let them slide a little since DD was born.
And maybe focus on a thought or phrase to help center myself during those early early hours when DS is asking me to construct a Lego Technic with him, so I can be present and revel in his lust for life, rather than thinking about the Sear's book average sleep quota for a toddler (or such) heh heh..!
I think that will help. He isn't quite at the stage when my presence alone is enough yet, but I imagine that will come soon enough, and then I'll miss it.
Thanks again to all who replied, and I'm still open to other thoughts about mellow activities and support for the parents - ie thank you to any future posters too.
Cornelia
--- In [email protected], "plaidpanties666" <plaidpanties666@...> wrote:
>
> and yes they are over tired and they do show it, so
> > sometimes i do need to tell them to find quiet activities(since they refuse
> > naps) to do separately because they are tired and are fighting because they
> > are tired.
>
> Woops, sorry, did you mean the Kids were overtired and grumpy? That happens - its part of how they learn what "tired" means. It does help to set up mellower activities, even to create a settling down routine for some kids much like a conventional "bedtime" but without the focus on the clock.
>
> ---Meredith
>
The Coffee Goddess
I have a 2 1/2 yo and we have recently discovered that when she stays up late it
is often because she is hungry, but doesn't know how to express it. When I ask
if she wants food, she will say no, but if I get a yogurt and a spoon and offer
it to her she will eat it all quickly and then fall fast asleep. Even though
she nurses to sleep, having a little "other" food in her tummy seems to do the
trick for her. YMMV :)
Dana
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
is often because she is hungry, but doesn't know how to express it. When I ask
if she wants food, she will say no, but if I get a yogurt and a spoon and offer
it to her she will eat it all quickly and then fall fast asleep. Even though
she nurses to sleep, having a little "other" food in her tummy seems to do the
trick for her. YMMV :)
Dana
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Debra Rossing
Can you trade off small chunks of time? - rather than trying to find an
hour or two, look for 20-30 minute "snacks" of rest. For instance, can
your partner hang out watching Bob the Builder for 30 minutes while the
baby is asleep so you can go take a long, slow shower (or whatever it is
you find relaxing)? Then the next evening (presuming that one of you is
working outside the home, thus evenings are when both are available),
your partner gets a half hour "snack". Doesn't sound like a lot, but
sometimes just knowing that "I can get through this, I've got a 'snack
rest' coming up this evening/tomorrow/whatever". Use those little times
when the baby is asleep and your toddler is assembling his train tracks
to read a magazine article or just sit and look at the clouds go by,
rather than all those to-dos in your head. Yes, that needs to get done
eventually, but spending 20 minutes once or twice a day to rest yourself
takes priority over dishes. As you noted, rightly, this stage with a
toddler and infant will be gone in a flash, and your time will look
different.
--Deb R
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hour or two, look for 20-30 minute "snacks" of rest. For instance, can
your partner hang out watching Bob the Builder for 30 minutes while the
baby is asleep so you can go take a long, slow shower (or whatever it is
you find relaxing)? Then the next evening (presuming that one of you is
working outside the home, thus evenings are when both are available),
your partner gets a half hour "snack". Doesn't sound like a lot, but
sometimes just knowing that "I can get through this, I've got a 'snack
rest' coming up this evening/tomorrow/whatever". Use those little times
when the baby is asleep and your toddler is assembling his train tracks
to read a magazine article or just sit and look at the clouds go by,
rather than all those to-dos in your head. Yes, that needs to get done
eventually, but spending 20 minutes once or twice a day to rest yourself
takes priority over dishes. As you noted, rightly, this stage with a
toddler and infant will be gone in a flash, and your time will look
different.
--Deb R
**********************************************************************
This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential and
intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they
are addressed. If you have received this email in error please notify
the system manager.
This footnote also confirms that this email message has been swept by
MIMEsweeper for the presence of computer viruses.
www.mastercam.com
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