Kids won't sleep, deny being tired, overtired.
naturalmommyx2
Hi Christina here again, I have posted a couple times in the last few weeks. I am in the beginning of this unschooling shift and keep finding myself lost in transition not knowing what to do. I know that ultimately this is a good thing and is providing an opportunity to take a long hard look at myself. I apologize now for the long post!!
My 4 yr old DS has had sleep issues since he was 3 months old. He just doesn't want to sleep. He will keep himself awake until he can no longer do so. He will have all the classic signs of being tired, then overtired. We just moved almost 2 months ago and I think this could be part of the adjustment. Before we moved he would somtimes keep himself up till about 10 or 11 but now its 12 or even 1am! Now recently because he can't sleep he keeps his 3 year old sister awake playing. She is usually our by 7 and naps in the day, great sleeper:)In turn this keeps my 11 month old up since they keep barging in the room when I am nursing him to sleep or they are being so loud. Everyone in the house is tired and stressed out at night now. My DH and I can't even watch a movie at night together without being interrupted 50 times. I feel I have tried everything. I have provided them an array of choices such as playing in their room till they feel like going to sleep, sleep in my room, watch tv till they fall asleep(or not), separate them into different rooms,etc. But my DS, Sheamus just keeps going and going and going!!! He, by the third night of this, around 7pm says "I want to go to nap" (I love hearing him say that cuz it is not often he will admit he is tired) So we go get settled in to beds or floors or wherever he chooses and then it seems he has to go another round of playing!! I am really stressed about this for a few reasons. One is I don't have much 'me' time and all this staying up late is getting in the way of that, leaving me exhausted and not motivated to do the things I like to do such as get things cleaned up, spend time with DH, blog, whatever. Second is because DH is looking at me like I don't have a clue how to parent and that I am a doormat to our children. He works so much lately and is so tired he hasn't helped me put them to bed since we moved in. I do everything for the 3 of them, everything. Tonight I locked myself in my room with my 11 mo. and took a bath with him, playing, nursing, playing, nursing, hoping they would somehow be asleep or my husband would take over. I felt like i was going to lose it with anger, the bath helped but when I got out I could here my kids playing in the toilet in the other bathroom! Icing to the cake! DH either fell asleep or was choosing to do nothing. I sat in the hallway and cried. My DD said "mommy is crying cause she don't like us?" That obviously made me more sad. I don't want her to feel that way. My son told her "mommy is because what we're doing all night, playing around and not going to nap". I put my baby to sleep and put them in their beds, removed most toys and turned ALL lights off. They usually need the hall light on or they freak out. I laid by their doorway and much to my surprise within 10 min they were asleep. My son was out within 4 min, no crying, no fussing. It was midnight so not sure if it was how I handled it or cuz he was done. Does anyone know more about kids like this, that just flat out don't want to sleep no matter how tired they are and deny their tired feelings? What are some of the ways you radical unschoolers would handle this? I don't know what else to do but being up this late and not having 'me' time is taking a toll. Im usually in bed well before midnight. I have brought out the bounce house and they have jumped for hours and STILL they stay up till midnight raring to go! Sorry for such a long post, right now this is my only outlet and only place to be heard and given positive advice.
Thanks in advance I know this will give me some insight. I know what is going on must be something energetic I am sending out but I am not sure what.
-Christina
My 4 yr old DS has had sleep issues since he was 3 months old. He just doesn't want to sleep. He will keep himself awake until he can no longer do so. He will have all the classic signs of being tired, then overtired. We just moved almost 2 months ago and I think this could be part of the adjustment. Before we moved he would somtimes keep himself up till about 10 or 11 but now its 12 or even 1am! Now recently because he can't sleep he keeps his 3 year old sister awake playing. She is usually our by 7 and naps in the day, great sleeper:)In turn this keeps my 11 month old up since they keep barging in the room when I am nursing him to sleep or they are being so loud. Everyone in the house is tired and stressed out at night now. My DH and I can't even watch a movie at night together without being interrupted 50 times. I feel I have tried everything. I have provided them an array of choices such as playing in their room till they feel like going to sleep, sleep in my room, watch tv till they fall asleep(or not), separate them into different rooms,etc. But my DS, Sheamus just keeps going and going and going!!! He, by the third night of this, around 7pm says "I want to go to nap" (I love hearing him say that cuz it is not often he will admit he is tired) So we go get settled in to beds or floors or wherever he chooses and then it seems he has to go another round of playing!! I am really stressed about this for a few reasons. One is I don't have much 'me' time and all this staying up late is getting in the way of that, leaving me exhausted and not motivated to do the things I like to do such as get things cleaned up, spend time with DH, blog, whatever. Second is because DH is looking at me like I don't have a clue how to parent and that I am a doormat to our children. He works so much lately and is so tired he hasn't helped me put them to bed since we moved in. I do everything for the 3 of them, everything. Tonight I locked myself in my room with my 11 mo. and took a bath with him, playing, nursing, playing, nursing, hoping they would somehow be asleep or my husband would take over. I felt like i was going to lose it with anger, the bath helped but when I got out I could here my kids playing in the toilet in the other bathroom! Icing to the cake! DH either fell asleep or was choosing to do nothing. I sat in the hallway and cried. My DD said "mommy is crying cause she don't like us?" That obviously made me more sad. I don't want her to feel that way. My son told her "mommy is because what we're doing all night, playing around and not going to nap". I put my baby to sleep and put them in their beds, removed most toys and turned ALL lights off. They usually need the hall light on or they freak out. I laid by their doorway and much to my surprise within 10 min they were asleep. My son was out within 4 min, no crying, no fussing. It was midnight so not sure if it was how I handled it or cuz he was done. Does anyone know more about kids like this, that just flat out don't want to sleep no matter how tired they are and deny their tired feelings? What are some of the ways you radical unschoolers would handle this? I don't know what else to do but being up this late and not having 'me' time is taking a toll. Im usually in bed well before midnight. I have brought out the bounce house and they have jumped for hours and STILL they stay up till midnight raring to go! Sorry for such a long post, right now this is my only outlet and only place to be heard and given positive advice.
Thanks in advance I know this will give me some insight. I know what is going on must be something energetic I am sending out but I am not sure what.
-Christina
Schuyler
What things help him to relax? Does a warm bath, do quiet movies all cuddled up
with mom and dad and younger siblings in a darkened room in a darkened house?
Warm milk? Does the activity level in a day make a difference? If you spend
hours and hours at the park is he more likely to go to sleep in the evening? If
you go to a ball room, one of those indoor playrooms with balls and tunnels and
slides and spend all day playing is he more sleepy at the end? What about going
swimming? that's hugely enervating. Does nothing seem to impact his seemingly
infinite energy supply?
I'm guessing that the more you are active during the day, and I don't mean just
bouncing in a bounce house, but seriously going out to seek new and exciting
places to play all day long, the more likely he'll be tired by the end of the
day. And if you implement falling to sleep things, quieter house, quieter rooms,
darker rooms, cozy cuddle spaces, story reading, relaxing baths, gentle talking,
slower moments, I'm guessing a busy day and a quiet evening will really help him
to fall asleep. Try it out, see what works. See what things help to run off all
of this fabulous energy he has and what things help to relax him. Maybe back
stories or gentle massages with warm lotion would help. Maybe telling quiet and
calm stories would help.
One is simply changing the rhythm of your days so that there are breaks. The
likelihood that with 3 children under 5 that you are going to have really any
personal time is pretty small. But you can carve out breathable moments by
finding dvds that at least 2 of your children will enjoy during maybe your
littlest's naptime. When I was super tired with Simon and Linnaea I would set us
up in a room with a mattress by the door for me to lie on. And then I would set
up lots of things for them to do. And I would nap while they played. It meant
that I knew where they were. They weren't going out of the room without getting
me to move and that I could get a nap in. Sometimes, when they were older, David
and I would take them to Ikea where they had a creche. David and I would shop
while Simon and Linnaea played in the daycare creche. We had walkie talkies so
that if anything happened we could be paged and it gave us this little time to
ourselves. It wasn't an oft used tool, and they stopped wanting to go in there
at some point, but it did give David and I the occasionally date moment. I know
others have spoken of going to McDonalds playlands late at night so that their
kids could run themselves out a bit before bed.
Another thing you can do is hire someone to come and hang out with your kids
while you are home. See if you local homeschooling community has any teens
interested in making a little money co-watching children. You'd be home with
your family while bringing someone else to take some of the burden off of your
shoulders. It would also help you to be more engaged with your new community.
You could see about getting someone in to clean once a week. It may cost less
than you think and it would certainly take away your need to clean at the
expense of time spent with your children.
You could get a crockpot so that you can put food in when you have a moment and
have dinner ready much later without a huge amount of attention spent on
cooking. My dad adored our crockpot. It meant he could feed my brother and me
well even if he had to work later than he anticipated. Anything that frees up
more time is a good thing.
You have 3 children under 5 years of age. That's a lot of time investment. If
keeping them home with you is a priority there is really no way around the time
you have to invest to keep your house singing and playing peacefully, which
isn't the same as quietly. With every one of your requests for help I keep
giving you the same answer: time. You have to invest time. And I understand, at
least sort of, it's been a long time since I had two children under 5, it's been
a long time since I had to be everything to Simon and to Linnaea, what it is to
be tired all the time, what it is to have nothing left for yourself. There is a
trick of it. There is a meditative trick to finding the moments for yourself
within the moments for others. When you get it right, when you inhale and exhale
in the rhythm of your days, it's like nothing else, it's like walking on water.
It's about being present in that moment. Not thinking about cleaning, not
thinking about blogging, not thinking about when your time will start, not
looking outside and away for things to do, but being right where you are and
with who you are with. Oh, my gosh, it is so very powerful.
I got sent this wonderful video link this morning called
Moments: http://vimeo.com/8189067. Life is just a series of those. And if you
can figure out how to engage with those series of moments and not resent those
moments, oh, it is the most amazing skill.
clueless that you are pressing upon him this vision of yourself. I assume his
working is helping you to stay home. David works for that freedom for me. I can
remember really wanting him to know what hell it was to be home so that he would
appreciate all that I did. But it wasn't hell, it was hard, but I got to be
every moment where I most wanted to be. And I still do. I've gotten to see far
more moments of Simon's and Linnaea's lives than I've missed because of my very
generous and very supportive husband.
It's a gift, it's a luxury item this life, this unschooling life. I don't have
any promise that it will last any longer than it has. I would work very hard to
keep it going, but I don't have to because David has worked so diligently to
keep me in these diamonds and pearls that have been the moments with Simon and
Linnaea. That doesn't mean that I don't lose it, that I don't have moments when
I think of what might also have been, but it does keep me humble and grateful
outside of the stumbling. And when I have the moments of what might have been I
try and spin them out as far as I can, I try and see where it would have gone in
some sort of Scrooge ghost of future yet to come tale and it always has gotten
me to somewhere I wouldn't want to be nearly as much as where I am.
One of the ways to get you through bad moments are making sure that you are
eating well. Make sure that your energy levels are as buffered as they can
possibly be. Have lots of yummy foods around that you can grab and go with. Easy
to put together things. Lower your expectations of what you can start and finish
in a day. If the house is driving you nuts, look for smaller solutions to
cleaning. Put boxes or buckets around that you can throw toys into easily to
tidy out a room. Don't see it as a failed attempt if you start doing the dishes
only to be pulled away by the three children who so definitely need you and want
you. See it as a few dishes done. Get paper plates to use when days are too
hectic for dish washing.
Schuyler
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
with mom and dad and younger siblings in a darkened room in a darkened house?
Warm milk? Does the activity level in a day make a difference? If you spend
hours and hours at the park is he more likely to go to sleep in the evening? If
you go to a ball room, one of those indoor playrooms with balls and tunnels and
slides and spend all day playing is he more sleepy at the end? What about going
swimming? that's hugely enervating. Does nothing seem to impact his seemingly
infinite energy supply?
I'm guessing that the more you are active during the day, and I don't mean just
bouncing in a bounce house, but seriously going out to seek new and exciting
places to play all day long, the more likely he'll be tired by the end of the
day. And if you implement falling to sleep things, quieter house, quieter rooms,
darker rooms, cozy cuddle spaces, story reading, relaxing baths, gentle talking,
slower moments, I'm guessing a busy day and a quiet evening will really help him
to fall asleep. Try it out, see what works. See what things help to run off all
of this fabulous energy he has and what things help to relax him. Maybe back
stories or gentle massages with warm lotion would help. Maybe telling quiet and
calm stories would help.
>>I am really stressed about this for a few reasons. One is I don't have much 'me'There are a couple of things you could do to facilitate more downtime for you.
>>time and all this staying up late is getting in the way of that, leaving me
>>exhausted and not motivated to do the things I like to do such as get things
>>cleaned up, spend time with DH, blog, whatever. <<
One is simply changing the rhythm of your days so that there are breaks. The
likelihood that with 3 children under 5 that you are going to have really any
personal time is pretty small. But you can carve out breathable moments by
finding dvds that at least 2 of your children will enjoy during maybe your
littlest's naptime. When I was super tired with Simon and Linnaea I would set us
up in a room with a mattress by the door for me to lie on. And then I would set
up lots of things for them to do. And I would nap while they played. It meant
that I knew where they were. They weren't going out of the room without getting
me to move and that I could get a nap in. Sometimes, when they were older, David
and I would take them to Ikea where they had a creche. David and I would shop
while Simon and Linnaea played in the daycare creche. We had walkie talkies so
that if anything happened we could be paged and it gave us this little time to
ourselves. It wasn't an oft used tool, and they stopped wanting to go in there
at some point, but it did give David and I the occasionally date moment. I know
others have spoken of going to McDonalds playlands late at night so that their
kids could run themselves out a bit before bed.
Another thing you can do is hire someone to come and hang out with your kids
while you are home. See if you local homeschooling community has any teens
interested in making a little money co-watching children. You'd be home with
your family while bringing someone else to take some of the burden off of your
shoulders. It would also help you to be more engaged with your new community.
You could see about getting someone in to clean once a week. It may cost less
than you think and it would certainly take away your need to clean at the
expense of time spent with your children.
You could get a crockpot so that you can put food in when you have a moment and
have dinner ready much later without a huge amount of attention spent on
cooking. My dad adored our crockpot. It meant he could feed my brother and me
well even if he had to work later than he anticipated. Anything that frees up
more time is a good thing.
You have 3 children under 5 years of age. That's a lot of time investment. If
keeping them home with you is a priority there is really no way around the time
you have to invest to keep your house singing and playing peacefully, which
isn't the same as quietly. With every one of your requests for help I keep
giving you the same answer: time. You have to invest time. And I understand, at
least sort of, it's been a long time since I had two children under 5, it's been
a long time since I had to be everything to Simon and to Linnaea, what it is to
be tired all the time, what it is to have nothing left for yourself. There is a
trick of it. There is a meditative trick to finding the moments for yourself
within the moments for others. When you get it right, when you inhale and exhale
in the rhythm of your days, it's like nothing else, it's like walking on water.
It's about being present in that moment. Not thinking about cleaning, not
thinking about blogging, not thinking about when your time will start, not
looking outside and away for things to do, but being right where you are and
with who you are with. Oh, my gosh, it is so very powerful.
I got sent this wonderful video link this morning called
Moments: http://vimeo.com/8189067. Life is just a series of those. And if you
can figure out how to engage with those series of moments and not resent those
moments, oh, it is the most amazing skill.
>>Second is because DH is looking at me like I don't have a clue how to parent andMaybe he isn't looking at you that way. Maybe you are so afraid that you are
>>that I am a doormat to our children. He works so much lately and is so tired he
>>hasn't helped me put them to bed since we moved in. I do everything for the 3 of
>>them, everything.<<
clueless that you are pressing upon him this vision of yourself. I assume his
working is helping you to stay home. David works for that freedom for me. I can
remember really wanting him to know what hell it was to be home so that he would
appreciate all that I did. But it wasn't hell, it was hard, but I got to be
every moment where I most wanted to be. And I still do. I've gotten to see far
more moments of Simon's and Linnaea's lives than I've missed because of my very
generous and very supportive husband.
It's a gift, it's a luxury item this life, this unschooling life. I don't have
any promise that it will last any longer than it has. I would work very hard to
keep it going, but I don't have to because David has worked so diligently to
keep me in these diamonds and pearls that have been the moments with Simon and
Linnaea. That doesn't mean that I don't lose it, that I don't have moments when
I think of what might also have been, but it does keep me humble and grateful
outside of the stumbling. And when I have the moments of what might have been I
try and spin them out as far as I can, I try and see where it would have gone in
some sort of Scrooge ghost of future yet to come tale and it always has gotten
me to somewhere I wouldn't want to be nearly as much as where I am.
One of the ways to get you through bad moments are making sure that you are
eating well. Make sure that your energy levels are as buffered as they can
possibly be. Have lots of yummy foods around that you can grab and go with. Easy
to put together things. Lower your expectations of what you can start and finish
in a day. If the house is driving you nuts, look for smaller solutions to
cleaning. Put boxes or buckets around that you can throw toys into easily to
tidy out a room. Don't see it as a failed attempt if you start doing the dishes
only to be pulled away by the three children who so definitely need you and want
you. See it as a few dishes done. Get paper plates to use when days are too
hectic for dish washing.
Schuyler
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Schuyler
I wrote: "With every one of your requests for help I keep
giving you the same answer: time." which is wrong. I confused the poster with
someone else. So, to rectify, the answer to your request is time.
Sorry,
Schuyler
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
giving you the same answer: time." which is wrong. I confused the poster with
someone else. So, to rectify, the answer to your request is time.
Sorry,
Schuyler
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kelley C Smith
Our family just gave up on PS at the end of the quarter. We're trying to
sort out alternatives.
Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it
will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
Is there a yahoo group or something for teens?
Are there ways the teens can agree to read a book and discuss it online?
View a movie and discuss it?
Just wondering. We're somewhat bewildered and searching for good
possibilities.
Kelley
sort out alternatives.
Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it
will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
Is there a yahoo group or something for teens?
Are there ways the teens can agree to read a book and discuss it online?
View a movie and discuss it?
Just wondering. We're somewhat bewildered and searching for good
possibilities.
Kelley
atvannoy
Hi, Christina. My DD is 3.5 and DS is 5, so I understand quite a bit of what you're dealing with right now. DD has never been a good sleeper. She will go, go, go and never admit to being tired. In the past couple of weeks, DH has started lying down with her at night in her bed and staying until she goes to sleep. I do the same thing with DS at the same time. So, happily, they're both asleep by 9:15 pm (8:15 pm after the time change!).
Good Luck!
Good Luck!
plaidpanties666
Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...> wrote:
You can look for home/unschooling conferences, meetups and campouts in your area. The catch is, unschooling teens don't necessarily want to hang out with other unschooling teens. Some do, a lot of unschoolers are more interested in meeting people who share their specific interests - their true peers rather than their "age peers".
If your dd has friends who are still in school, look for ways for her to spend time with them. Their time will be a lot more restricted than hers, but maybe you can organize some movie-marathons or other kinds of small gatherings. But if she's looking for more friends in general, its time to think outside the "kids your age" school box. Most adults don't have same-age friends, after all. What does your dd like to do? Look for clubs or get-togethers of other people with similar interests.
Asking if unschooling is lonely is like asking if adulthood is lonely. How do adults make friends? Some people, with no more than school skills, struggle with that question life-long! So its worth the time and effort to help your dd explore new ways of meeting people now.
---Meredith (Mo 9, Ray 17)
>> Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it**********
> will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
You can look for home/unschooling conferences, meetups and campouts in your area. The catch is, unschooling teens don't necessarily want to hang out with other unschooling teens. Some do, a lot of unschoolers are more interested in meeting people who share their specific interests - their true peers rather than their "age peers".
If your dd has friends who are still in school, look for ways for her to spend time with them. Their time will be a lot more restricted than hers, but maybe you can organize some movie-marathons or other kinds of small gatherings. But if she's looking for more friends in general, its time to think outside the "kids your age" school box. Most adults don't have same-age friends, after all. What does your dd like to do? Look for clubs or get-togethers of other people with similar interests.
Asking if unschooling is lonely is like asking if adulthood is lonely. How do adults make friends? Some people, with no more than school skills, struggle with that question life-long! So its worth the time and effort to help your dd explore new ways of meeting people now.
---Meredith (Mo 9, Ray 17)
Kelley C Smith
Thanks. Maybe what we're doing will work out! She and my husband are
looking into more dog training activities. That's something she really
loves.
Maybe that will be OK. I think I just needed to have someone tell me that!
Thanks!
Kelley
looking into more dog training activities. That's something she really
loves.
Maybe that will be OK. I think I just needed to have someone tell me that!
Thanks!
Kelley
On 11/10/10 12:29 PM, plaidpanties666 wrote:
>
> Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...> wrote:
> >> Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it
> > will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
> **********
>
> You can look for home/unschooling conferences, meetups and campouts in
> your area. The catch is, unschooling teens don't necessarily want to
> hang out with other unschooling teens. Some do, a lot of unschoolers
> are more interested in meeting people who share their specific
> interests - their true peers rather than their "age peers".
>
> If your dd has friends who are still in school, look for ways for her
> to spend time with them. Their time will be a lot more restricted than
> hers, but maybe you can organize some movie-marathons or other kinds
> of small gatherings. But if she's looking for more friends in general,
> its time to think outside the "kids your age" school box. Most adults
> don't have same-age friends, after all. What does your dd like to do?
> Look for clubs or get-togethers of other people with similar interests.
>
> Asking if unschooling is lonely is like asking if adulthood is lonely.
> How do adults make friends? Some people, with no more than school
> skills, struggle with that question life-long! So its worth the time
> and effort to help your dd explore new ways of meeting people now.
>
> ---Meredith (Mo 9, Ray 17)
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
M H
I'm on the edge of unschooling and don't have teens, so my suggestions my not work. But What I would do if I were you is look for local homeschooling and unschooling groups in your area, by way of Yahoo and Meetup. And if you can't find a local group, try a state or county group then ask on those boards to see if there are others in your area.
My kids really enjoy having a variety of friends from public schoolers to homeschoolers, but for me it is important that they have access to other kids of all ages that are homeschoolers/unschoolers so they know they aren't alone.
As far as book groups and stuff. If your daughter is really interested in that, see if your public library has book clubs. The libraries in our area have multiple different book clubs for kids and adults.
Hope that helps.
~Megan~ (Mom of 3; ages 3, 4, and 7)
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/KitsapSecularHS/%c2%a0%c2%a0
http://bubblehead-ed.tumblr.com/
My kids really enjoy having a variety of friends from public schoolers to homeschoolers, but for me it is important that they have access to other kids of all ages that are homeschoolers/unschoolers so they know they aren't alone.
As far as book groups and stuff. If your daughter is really interested in that, see if your public library has book clubs. The libraries in our area have multiple different book clubs for kids and adults.
Hope that helps.
~Megan~ (Mom of 3; ages 3, 4, and 7)
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/KitsapSecularHS/%c2%a0%c2%a0
http://bubblehead-ed.tumblr.com/
--- On Tue, 11/9/10, Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...> wrote:
From: Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...>
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] Is unschooling lonely?
To: [email protected]
Date: Tuesday, November 9, 2010, 6:04 PM
Our family just gave up on PS at the end of the quarter. We're trying to
sort out alternatives.
Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it
will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
Is there a yahoo group or something for teens?
Are there ways the teens can agree to read a book and discuss it online?
View a movie and discuss it?
Just wondering. We're somewhat bewildered and searching for good
possibilities.
Kelley
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
[email protected]
Kelley,
If you are on facebook you can friend me (facebook.com/jeffnkelly) and I can virtually introduce you and your teen to my three teens :)
I have a 16 yo son, Wolf, a 14 year old son, Griffin, and my daughter Zoe is 13. We are (soon to be) traveling radical unschoolers.
We have found unschooling gatherings,like conferences, to be the most helpful for meeting kids. We also do local hs groups but the closest friends my 16 yo has made has been from unschooling circles.
Another thing to keep in mind is the idea of making friends with entire families. In most cases our best friends are other families...as opposed to one person.
You can find lots of ideas on my blog too, just search teens.
http://unschoolbus.com or http://unschoolingliberty.com
Peace,
Kelly
If you are on facebook you can friend me (facebook.com/jeffnkelly) and I can virtually introduce you and your teen to my three teens :)
I have a 16 yo son, Wolf, a 14 year old son, Griffin, and my daughter Zoe is 13. We are (soon to be) traveling radical unschoolers.
We have found unschooling gatherings,like conferences, to be the most helpful for meeting kids. We also do local hs groups but the closest friends my 16 yo has made has been from unschooling circles.
Another thing to keep in mind is the idea of making friends with entire families. In most cases our best friends are other families...as opposed to one person.
You can find lots of ideas on my blog too, just search teens.
http://unschoolbus.com or http://unschoolingliberty.com
Peace,
Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Maybe she would be interested in showing in Junior Showmanship classes? Training dogs in obedience, tracking, agility, field work/herding/coursing, rally?
Maybe raising a guide dog puppy? (Hard to give up, but a *wonderful* experience!)
If she has a breed she especially likes, join that breed club and ask online for a Junior's dog. They're often given (no $$$) to promising young handlers. Two sisters I used to work with had a string of Junior's dogs: between them, they had two vizslak, a Weimaraner, an English cocker, a basset hound, a Scottish deerhound, and a whippet.
Dog shows and other events are a lot of fun! And every major city has a breed and/or obedience club, with many breed specific clubs nearby.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
"There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children." Marianne Williamson
-----Original Message-----
From: Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...>
Thanks. Maybe what we're doing will work out! She and my husband are
looking into more dog training activities. That's something she really
loves.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Maybe raising a guide dog puppy? (Hard to give up, but a *wonderful* experience!)
If she has a breed she especially likes, join that breed club and ask online for a Junior's dog. They're often given (no $$$) to promising young handlers. Two sisters I used to work with had a string of Junior's dogs: between them, they had two vizslak, a Weimaraner, an English cocker, a basset hound, a Scottish deerhound, and a whippet.
Dog shows and other events are a lot of fun! And every major city has a breed and/or obedience club, with many breed specific clubs nearby.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
"There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children." Marianne Williamson
-----Original Message-----
From: Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...>
Thanks. Maybe what we're doing will work out! She and my husband are
looking into more dog training activities. That's something she really
loves.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kelly Lovejoy
Look for unschoolers in your neighborhood. More than likely you'll find a few who are also looking for unschoolers in their area. Just remember that your "neighborhood" is bigger than you think. I am in the center of my "nieghborhood"---and my "neighbors" are as far as a five hour drive away! But we get together more than you can imagine! A bunch are coming here for Thanksgiving!
Where do you live? I bet I know someone in your town---or at least a town or two over.
Have you considered East Tenneesee Unschoolers' Camp or Not Back to School Camp next year? Attending a conference or Non Con? There's one near you!
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
"There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children." Marianne Williamson
-----Original Message-----
From: Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...>
Our family just gave up on PS at the end of the quarter. We're trying to
sort out alternatives.
Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it
will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
Is there a yahoo group or something for teens?
Are there ways the teens can agree to read a book and discuss it online?
View a movie and discuss it?
Just wondering. We're somewhat bewildered and searching for good
possibilities.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Where do you live? I bet I know someone in your town---or at least a town or two over.
Have you considered East Tenneesee Unschoolers' Camp or Not Back to School Camp next year? Attending a conference or Non Con? There's one near you!
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
"There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children." Marianne Williamson
-----Original Message-----
From: Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...>
Our family just gave up on PS at the end of the quarter. We're trying to
sort out alternatives.
Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it
will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
Is there a yahoo group or something for teens?
Are there ways the teens can agree to read a book and discuss it online?
View a movie and discuss it?
Just wondering. We're somewhat bewildered and searching for good
possibilities.
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kelley C Smith
Live in Oklahoma City.
What's a Non Con?
Thanks!
K
What's a Non Con?
Thanks!
K
On 11/11/10 10:33 PM, Kelly Lovejoy wrote:
>
> Look for unschoolers in your neighborhood. More than likely you'll
> find a few who are also looking for unschoolers in their area. Just
> remember that your "neighborhood" is bigger than you think. I am in
> the center of my "nieghborhood"---and my "neighbors" are as far as a
> five hour drive away! But we get together more than you can imagine! A
> bunch are coming here for Thanksgiving!
>
> Where do you live? I bet I know someone in your town---or at least a
> town or two over.
>
> Have you considered East Tenneesee Unschoolers' Camp or Not Back to
> School Camp next year? Attending a conference or Non Con? There's one
> near you!
>
> ~Kelly
>
> Kelly Lovejoy
> "There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving
> the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children."
> Marianne Williamson
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Kelley C Smith <smithkc@... <mailto:smithkc%40riskiii.com>>
>
> Our family just gave up on PS at the end of the quarter. We're trying to
> sort out alternatives.
>
> Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid it
> will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
>
> Is there a yahoo group or something for teens?
>
> Are there ways the teens can agree to read a book and discuss it online?
> View a movie and discuss it?
>
> Just wondering. We're somewhat bewildered and searching for good
> possibilities.
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY
NON-Cons are non conference unshooling gatherings that happen pretty much all
over the US.
You can even organize one youself!!
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
over the US.
You can even organize one youself!!
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kelley C Smith
Hmmm.... organize one myself? Well, I guess I am still skeptical that
unschooling is going to work for my teen. We just gave up on PS at the
end of the quarter. I know she will need some time to get her bearings
(me too).
I hardly think I could advocate unschooling for others -- it would seem
that is what i'd be doing if I attempted to organize an "unschooling"
seminar. And where do you find potential attendees? OKC is such a --
well -- conservative place. The only support groups are for evangelicals
who believe children should respect authority -- any authority! I feel
like I am the only person in town who would entertain such an idea as
unschooling.
K
unschooling is going to work for my teen. We just gave up on PS at the
end of the quarter. I know she will need some time to get her bearings
(me too).
I hardly think I could advocate unschooling for others -- it would seem
that is what i'd be doing if I attempted to organize an "unschooling"
seminar. And where do you find potential attendees? OKC is such a --
well -- conservative place. The only support groups are for evangelicals
who believe children should respect authority -- any authority! I feel
like I am the only person in town who would entertain such an idea as
unschooling.
K
On 11/12/10 2:17 PM, BRIAN POLIKOWSKY wrote:
>
> NON-Cons are non conference unshooling gatherings that happen pretty
> much all
> over the US.
> You can even organize one youself!!
>
> Alex Polikowsky
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY
Non-cons are not seminars and not about advocating.
Non-cons are gatherings, get togethers, relaxing and gettig to know
othe unschooling families.
That way you can meet other unschoolers !!
Here is the one my wonderful friend Heather Brown from Iowa organzed for my
Minnesota
Unschooling yahoo group last year:
http://polykow.blogspot.com/2009/03/unschoolers-having-fun-in-minnesota.html
and here are links for a few more:
http://familyrun.ning.com/group/autodidactradicalgatheringofhomeschoolersargh
http://arghgatherings.blogspot.com/
http://zombieprincess.blogspot.com/2007/11/non-con-07.html
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Non-cons are gatherings, get togethers, relaxing and gettig to know
othe unschooling families.
That way you can meet other unschoolers !!
Here is the one my wonderful friend Heather Brown from Iowa organzed for my
Minnesota
Unschooling yahoo group last year:
http://polykow.blogspot.com/2009/03/unschoolers-having-fun-in-minnesota.html
and here are links for a few more:
http://familyrun.ning.com/group/autodidactradicalgatheringofhomeschoolersargh
http://arghgatherings.blogspot.com/
http://zombieprincess.blogspot.com/2007/11/non-con-07.html
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Kelly Lovejoy
Melissa is in OK---I don't know which city, but I'll ask her.
Her oldest is probably 13 or 14, maybe.
Sent from my iPhone
Her oldest is probably 13 or 14, maybe.
Sent from my iPhone
On Nov 12, 2010, at 2:27 PM, Kelley C Smith <smithkc@...> wrote:
> Live in Oklahoma City.
>
> What's a Non Con?
>
> Thanks!
> K
>
> On 11/11/10 10:33 PM, Kelly Lovejoy wrote:
>>
>> Look for unschoolers in your neighborhood. More than likely you'll
>> find a few who are also looking for unschoolers in their area. Just
>> remember that your "neighborhood" is bigger than you think. I am in
>> the center of my "nieghborhood"---and my "neighbors" are as far as a
>> five hour drive away! But we get together more than you can
>> imagine! A
>> bunch are coming here for Thanksgiving!
>>
>> Where do you live? I bet I know someone in your town---or at least a
>> town or two over.
>>
>> Have you considered East Tenneesee Unschoolers' Camp or Not Back to
>> School Camp next year? Attending a conference or Non Con? There's one
>> near you!
>>
>> ~Kelly
>>
>> Kelly Lovejoy
>> "There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving
>> the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children."
>> Marianne Williamson
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Kelley C Smith <smithkc@... <mailto:smithkc
>> %40riskiii.com>>
>>
>> Our family just gave up on PS at the end of the quarter. We're
>> trying to
>> sort out alternatives.
>>
>> Our daughter, sophomore, likes the idea of unschooling. I am afraid
>> it
>> will be very lonely. Where/how do teens meet other unschooling teens?
>>
>> Is there a yahoo group or something for teens?
>>
>> Are there ways the teens can agree to read a book and discuss it
>> online?
>> View a movie and discuss it?
>>
>> Just wondering. We're somewhat bewildered and searching for good
>> possibilities.
>>
>> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>>
>>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
> ------------------------------------
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>