Update on Bedtime and Transitions
griesellists
I spent some time thinking about my son (8 going on 9) and daughter (3)
and why we were having conflicts in the evenings. I realized where the
sticking point really has been. Andrew does not "need" a bedtime.
Daddy needs a bedtime.
Unlike the rest of us, Daddy has to get up at 6 in the morning to get
to work on time (It's a long commute on public transportation).
Unfortunately, we live in a small apartment in the first floor of a
house. Which means that the master bedroom doubles as the living room.
When he thinks about it as being courteous to Daddy's needs, he is much
more amenable to setting up his laptop in bed if he wants to stay up
after midnight, and he has been volunteering to have his dad read to
him earlier in the evening so he isn't disappointed that Dad has fallen
asleep and can't read to him.
We're still working on how to help his sister (with whom he shares the
one real bedroom) get the sleep she needs and let her Daddy get his
rest. Right now she's in that late napping stage a lot of 3 and 4 year
olds get into in which they're not quite on a 24 hour cycle. She falls
asleep after dinner (when I go to work), then wakes up around 8 p.m.
and isn't tired again until after midnight. The guys are loath to wake
her from those early evening naps because it's the one time of day they
can relax and have some uninterrupted time.
Tamara
and why we were having conflicts in the evenings. I realized where the
sticking point really has been. Andrew does not "need" a bedtime.
Daddy needs a bedtime.
Unlike the rest of us, Daddy has to get up at 6 in the morning to get
to work on time (It's a long commute on public transportation).
Unfortunately, we live in a small apartment in the first floor of a
house. Which means that the master bedroom doubles as the living room.
When he thinks about it as being courteous to Daddy's needs, he is much
more amenable to setting up his laptop in bed if he wants to stay up
after midnight, and he has been volunteering to have his dad read to
him earlier in the evening so he isn't disappointed that Dad has fallen
asleep and can't read to him.
We're still working on how to help his sister (with whom he shares the
one real bedroom) get the sleep she needs and let her Daddy get his
rest. Right now she's in that late napping stage a lot of 3 and 4 year
olds get into in which they're not quite on a 24 hour cycle. She falls
asleep after dinner (when I go to work), then wakes up around 8 p.m.
and isn't tired again until after midnight. The guys are loath to wake
her from those early evening naps because it's the one time of day they
can relax and have some uninterrupted time.
Tamara
Robin Bentley
On Mar 1, 2009, at 9:50 AM, griesellists wrote:
Daddy having to get sleep so he can get up early!
cuddle and a story? Maybe she'll fall asleep with him? Then, you could
gently move her to her bed when you get home. Just a thought.
> I spent some time thinking about my son (8 going on 9) and daughterSo cool! Kids are so often happy to work within real constraints like
> (3)
> and why we were having conflicts in the evenings. I realized where
> the
> sticking point really has been. Andrew does not "need" a bedtime.
> Daddy needs a bedtime.
>
> Unlike the rest of us, Daddy has to get up at 6 in the morning to get
> to work on time (It's a long commute on public transportation).
> Unfortunately, we live in a small apartment in the first floor of a
> house. Which means that the master bedroom doubles as the living
> room.
>
> When he thinks about it as being courteous to Daddy's needs, he is
> much
> more amenable to setting up his laptop in bed if he wants to stay up
> after midnight, and he has been volunteering to have his dad read to
> him earlier in the evening so he isn't disappointed that Dad has
> fallen
> asleep and can't read to him.
Daddy having to get sleep so he can get up early!
>How does Dad feel about laying down with your dd before midnight for a
> We're still working on how to help his sister (with whom he shares the
> one real bedroom) get the sleep she needs and let her Daddy get his
> rest. Right now she's in that late napping stage a lot of 3 and 4
> year
> olds get into in which they're not quite on a 24 hour cycle. She
> falls
> asleep after dinner (when I go to work), then wakes up around 8 p.m.
> and isn't tired again until after midnight. The guys are loath to
> wake
> her from those early evening naps because it's the one time of day
> they
> can relax and have some uninterrupted time.
cuddle and a story? Maybe she'll fall asleep with him? Then, you could
gently move her to her bed when you get home. Just a thought.
>Robin B.
>
Tamara Griesel
How does Dad feel about laying down with your dd before midnight for a
cuddle and a story? Maybe she'll fall asleep with him? Then, you could
gently move her to her bed when you get home. Just a thought.
It's just an awkward stage. I suspect when we get outside and run around more this spring she may tire out enough to nap a bit earlier, then be ready to go to sleep when I get home.
Tamara
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cuddle and a story? Maybe she'll fall asleep with him? Then, you could
gently move her to her bed when you get home. Just a thought.
>Robin B.
>Well, the thing isn't so much that she won't go to sleep when we'd like her to. It's that she falls asleep at 6:30 or 7 in the evening on nights I go to work, then wakes up around nine, usually a bit before I get home. So when we'd like to go to bed, she's ready to run around in circles and "Make it rain Legos". (Literally. Neither of my children are precisely sedate, even when sleeping.)
It's just an awkward stage. I suspect when we get outside and run around more this spring she may tire out enough to nap a bit earlier, then be ready to go to sleep when I get home.
Tamara
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