jessmiles07

Hi everyone!
I need some input on how to deal with my 5-6 yr old daisy troop. I have
been noticing as the year goes on that my girls are having some issues
with each other. I think it is in part due to school (my dd is the only
hsing child let alone radical unschooled child!)I am the leader of the
troop and I am trying to find ways to help the children deal with each
other.
A lot of the girls are being really mean to each other. I think it is
in part due to being around each other a lot. Secondly because of their
own family dynamics.
I think our next meeting is going to be about respecting each other and
ourselves etc. I am hopeing to show them that we should try and treat
everyone respectfully. Such a hard thing at this age with children that
I doubt are given much respect. My dd is having a hard time dealing
with a couple of girls because they are SO mean and she has never been
treated that way before. Tonight I talked her through some ways to
problem solve, one being to avoid them. (her idea) Another was to plain
tell them they are being mean and she doesn't like it. Thankfully she
isn't usually targeted (this is actually the first time) but it bothers
her when they are mean to others because she is so in tune with others
feelings.
So really the answer I would like is how to help them as a group to get
along. Any fun games we could play to instill respecting each other.
Also how to explain to our dd how to deal with others in these
situations because it is part of life. Any good tips?? :)

Thanks!
Jessica:)

Pam Sorooshian

On 2/19/2009 7:35 PM, jessmiles07 wrote:
> So really the answer I would like is how to help them as a group to get
> along. Any fun games we could play to instill respecting each other.
> Also how to explain to our dd how to deal with others in these
> situations because it is part of life. Any good tips??:)
>
>



Having been a girl scout leader for the past 20 years, I have to say
that you can't "teach" them to be nicer.

Set up the environment to support being nicer. Don't set up situations
where girls have to be "picked" by other girls, for example.

Don't even do small group things if that creates any conflict about who
is going to be in which group.

Tell us when the conflicts or meanness occur and we can give you more
specific ideas for setting things up to avoid it.

Keep them so busy and having so much fun that they are in too good a
mood and don't have time to be mean. That's the real solution.

-pam

Matt & Jessica

That looks like an awesome book!

I am going to get it. We don't play competition games though. It is mostly taking turns that bothers them right now.

I am thinking about making a chart of who has done certain things to make sure everyone gets a turn. I hate charts so I was REALLY reluctant to do this. But unless someone has a better idea, I think it might help in this situation.

I am also thinking of doing the wrinkled heart activity. Has anyone done that or read about it before? I thought that might be a good way to see how what you say affects the person you say it to. I really want to girls to respect their own feelings/boundaries while respecting the others in our group. It is a really hard thing to do with so many different personalities and this age. Mostly I don't like how they are hurting each others feelings. A few parents have just said it is normal for this age but I don't think it makes it right. I don't really think most of them realize how mean they are being. They are all GREAT girls. I really cherish each of their uniqueness. I think if they could work out the kinks they will all get along great (as much as groups do) and we will have a really fun group!

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