Introduction, Thanks & Questions
Latha Poonamallee
Hello all,
I am a lurker coming out to say 'Thank you' to those who ask interesting questions and to those who share their wisdom. Everyone of you have made me a better parent.
I have one son, Viyan (6 1/2) who wanted to drop out of school within the first few weeks of kindergarten. He is bright, curious, imaginative, conversational and a perfectionist - school just didn't work for him. I had to have him stay to complete the school year. I was a full time working mom, on the first year of tenure track and so had logistical issues. I am also a single parent. In any case, given the academic schedule and because I work in a research institution, my teaching demands are fairly low which gives me a ton of flexibility. We started homeschooling at the beginning of summer and I knew fully well that unschooling was the way to go for our family.
Not that there are not moments when I get panicky (if you know any East Indian family, you would know how psyched up we are about formal education, if you haven't met any, watch the documentary Spellbound), and I try to remind myself that my anxiety and panic is mine. And the more relaxed approach is what works for him and for both of us as a family. I would rather spend the energy that I would spending forcing him to do formal school on exploration and creating an interesting life for us. And of course, I have had to let the housekeeping standards go. My office has always been messy, piles of papers for my seventeen research projects and all that jazz. Now because we work all over the house, it is all messy. I am slowly learning to be okay with it, and not keep putting things away every half hour because everything will come out in fifteen minutes anyway.
In any case, I have no doubts at all about our unschooling decision. I believe it and have the evidence - he is learning a ton all the time - whether it is watching TV or being read to, playing on his computer, playing board games, helping me cook (occasionally!) he loves to crack eggs, play with dough for roti, playing with legos (both of us love legos) or taking a walk or whatever. I think he prefers being read to because it is a more of an interactive, social activity. Moreover, he wants more complex plots than Harold the Purple Crayons - so picture books are for looking at - Harry Potter and such is for reading:) But he is not ready to read these on his own.
He is also very deeply interested in math concepts rather than numerical exercises. So we have explored the concepts of multiplication, fractions, exponents, infinity, googol (also how it was misspelled by Larry Page). After watching CNN election coverage with me, he has shown interest in percentages, apart from many other history/civics conversations we have been engaged in during and post election.
We are not radical unschoolers though - more of organic homeschoolers - because I do have to be on campus a couple of days a week. I found a babysitter (an immigrant like myself) who gets our educational choice. And my classes are in the afternoon so I don't have to rush him out of the house. Next semester, I have scheduled two evening classes, hoping that it would be even better.
As I mentioned, thank you to all you guys! Now, here are the questions.
I love being with him all the time and both of us are learning so much together. But I need to establish a good rhythm to make my (professional) work and attention to Viyan reasonably balanced (not to mention my health). As I mentioned, he goes to a sitter when I have to be in school (class, office hours, faculty meeting) - say about ten to fifteen hours a week. I can do my class prep/grading and other teaching related stuff with him around. But my research work takes more focus than my teaching stuff. Right now, I am working nights (when he goes to bed before 11 pm) between 11 pm and 3/4 am. Or if I am too exhausted (which I am, because as a single parent to a single child, there is not much buffer for either of us) to work, I work from 4 am until 9 am or so (till he wakes up). But I am not a morning person, so most days, I find that I am not able to wake up at 4 am. I will be very interested to hear ideas on how to make this work. Because, I love my
job, need it, cannot go part time (will lose visa status), need to publish (plus love, love my research).
Another question: if unschooling implies no expectations about college, how do you guys save for college? Considering the current economic situation, I am worried about finances. I make reasonably good money, but still have debts to be paid off. Apart from the home mortgage and insurance, I have no real savings and would like to start saving for Viyan's future. Any ideas?
Thanks in advance for your consideration and support,
Cordially
Latha
I am a lurker coming out to say 'Thank you' to those who ask interesting questions and to those who share their wisdom. Everyone of you have made me a better parent.
I have one son, Viyan (6 1/2) who wanted to drop out of school within the first few weeks of kindergarten. He is bright, curious, imaginative, conversational and a perfectionist - school just didn't work for him. I had to have him stay to complete the school year. I was a full time working mom, on the first year of tenure track and so had logistical issues. I am also a single parent. In any case, given the academic schedule and because I work in a research institution, my teaching demands are fairly low which gives me a ton of flexibility. We started homeschooling at the beginning of summer and I knew fully well that unschooling was the way to go for our family.
Not that there are not moments when I get panicky (if you know any East Indian family, you would know how psyched up we are about formal education, if you haven't met any, watch the documentary Spellbound), and I try to remind myself that my anxiety and panic is mine. And the more relaxed approach is what works for him and for both of us as a family. I would rather spend the energy that I would spending forcing him to do formal school on exploration and creating an interesting life for us. And of course, I have had to let the housekeeping standards go. My office has always been messy, piles of papers for my seventeen research projects and all that jazz. Now because we work all over the house, it is all messy. I am slowly learning to be okay with it, and not keep putting things away every half hour because everything will come out in fifteen minutes anyway.
In any case, I have no doubts at all about our unschooling decision. I believe it and have the evidence - he is learning a ton all the time - whether it is watching TV or being read to, playing on his computer, playing board games, helping me cook (occasionally!) he loves to crack eggs, play with dough for roti, playing with legos (both of us love legos) or taking a walk or whatever. I think he prefers being read to because it is a more of an interactive, social activity. Moreover, he wants more complex plots than Harold the Purple Crayons - so picture books are for looking at - Harry Potter and such is for reading:) But he is not ready to read these on his own.
He is also very deeply interested in math concepts rather than numerical exercises. So we have explored the concepts of multiplication, fractions, exponents, infinity, googol (also how it was misspelled by Larry Page). After watching CNN election coverage with me, he has shown interest in percentages, apart from many other history/civics conversations we have been engaged in during and post election.
We are not radical unschoolers though - more of organic homeschoolers - because I do have to be on campus a couple of days a week. I found a babysitter (an immigrant like myself) who gets our educational choice. And my classes are in the afternoon so I don't have to rush him out of the house. Next semester, I have scheduled two evening classes, hoping that it would be even better.
As I mentioned, thank you to all you guys! Now, here are the questions.
I love being with him all the time and both of us are learning so much together. But I need to establish a good rhythm to make my (professional) work and attention to Viyan reasonably balanced (not to mention my health). As I mentioned, he goes to a sitter when I have to be in school (class, office hours, faculty meeting) - say about ten to fifteen hours a week. I can do my class prep/grading and other teaching related stuff with him around. But my research work takes more focus than my teaching stuff. Right now, I am working nights (when he goes to bed before 11 pm) between 11 pm and 3/4 am. Or if I am too exhausted (which I am, because as a single parent to a single child, there is not much buffer for either of us) to work, I work from 4 am until 9 am or so (till he wakes up). But I am not a morning person, so most days, I find that I am not able to wake up at 4 am. I will be very interested to hear ideas on how to make this work. Because, I love my
job, need it, cannot go part time (will lose visa status), need to publish (plus love, love my research).
Another question: if unschooling implies no expectations about college, how do you guys save for college? Considering the current economic situation, I am worried about finances. I make reasonably good money, but still have debts to be paid off. Apart from the home mortgage and insurance, I have no real savings and would like to start saving for Viyan's future. Any ideas?
Thanks in advance for your consideration and support,
Cordially
Latha
Debra Rossing
As for college savings, look into the 529 plans (you don't have to use
the plan that your state offers, you can pick whatever plan seems best
for your particular situation, I think every state offers them as well
as private financial institutions). A 529 is cool because it is a tax
deferred plan designed for education use. AND here's the biggie as
relates to your question, it does NOT have to be used by the proposed
beneficiary. For instance, we have a 529 for DS. If he chooses not to
use it, DH might use it for further work on his master's degree. Or, we
can 'gift' it to a niece or a nephew for their college expenses. It
doesn't have to be used for a standard 4 year college either - community
college, culinary school, and so on would all "count". So, if your DS
chooses something besides college, the money's not totally "lost" - you
can use it, you can gift it to a relative (I think the only requirement
is that it be a family member), he can use it for training in a field of
interest via a technical or vocational program.
Or, you could choose a non-specific savings vehicle such as a CD
(certificate of deposit) and just sock away the funds for anything in
the future. Any tax savings or whatever would vary depending on the
situation obviously (consult a professional if you have questions).
Deb R
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the plan that your state offers, you can pick whatever plan seems best
for your particular situation, I think every state offers them as well
as private financial institutions). A 529 is cool because it is a tax
deferred plan designed for education use. AND here's the biggie as
relates to your question, it does NOT have to be used by the proposed
beneficiary. For instance, we have a 529 for DS. If he chooses not to
use it, DH might use it for further work on his master's degree. Or, we
can 'gift' it to a niece or a nephew for their college expenses. It
doesn't have to be used for a standard 4 year college either - community
college, culinary school, and so on would all "count". So, if your DS
chooses something besides college, the money's not totally "lost" - you
can use it, you can gift it to a relative (I think the only requirement
is that it be a family member), he can use it for training in a field of
interest via a technical or vocational program.
Or, you could choose a non-specific savings vehicle such as a CD
(certificate of deposit) and just sock away the funds for anything in
the future. Any tax savings or whatever would vary depending on the
situation obviously (consult a professional if you have questions).
Deb R
**********************************************************************
This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential and
intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they
are addressed. If you have received this email in error please notify
the system manager.
This footnote also confirms that this email message has been swept by
MIMEsweeper for the presence of computer viruses.
CNC Software, Inc.
www.mastercam.com
**********************************************************************
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Pamela Sorooshian
On Nov 8, 2008, at 9:58 AM, Latha Poonamallee wrote:
into that - maybe develop it for where you teach, if it isn't
available now. Talk about flexibility! <G>
-pam
> And my classes are in the afternoon so I don't have to rush him outI've started teaching all online courses. You might be able to get
> of the house. Next semester, I have scheduled two evening classes,
> hoping that it would be even better.
into that - maybe develop it for where you teach, if it isn't
available now. Talk about flexibility! <G>
-pam
Meredith
--- In [email protected], Latha Poonamallee
<pclatha@...> wrote:
(professional) work and attention to Viyan reasonably balanced (not
to mention my health).
*************************
We've had a number of different rhythms around here, besides adding a
teenager to the family and me going to work ft it seems like every
time Mo (now 7) has another "developmental growth spurt" our rhythm
changes again. So I guess I'd say that rhythms *change* and that it
takes time to settle into a new one.
Maybe what you need is to find ways to streamline and/or reorganize
some of your life. Hard to say what that would look like for you, but
I'll throw out an example from my own life. I do a certain amount of
subcontracting, making small parts for player pianos. Some of that I
can do anywhere, some I need to have a place to set a hot iron (and
plug it in), some I need to be able to really concentrate on what I'm
doing. So every time I'd get a new job I'd take time to organize all
those parts of the job and design a sort of "flow" that allowed me to
maximize what little "shop time" I could get. Sometimes that meant
doing multiple jobs at the same time so I could do all the cutting at
once (say, at the playground).
You may be doing a lot of that sort of thing already! Its possible
you actually have a sort-of rhythm already, its just not a very
comfortable one right now :( Happily, as I said before, that will
change as your ds gets older - his needs and interests wont be the
same in a year!
---Meredith (Mo 7, Ray 15)
<pclatha@...> wrote:
>> I love being with him all the time and both of us are learning somuch together. But I need to establish a good rhythm to make my
(professional) work and attention to Viyan reasonably balanced (not
to mention my health).
*************************
We've had a number of different rhythms around here, besides adding a
teenager to the family and me going to work ft it seems like every
time Mo (now 7) has another "developmental growth spurt" our rhythm
changes again. So I guess I'd say that rhythms *change* and that it
takes time to settle into a new one.
Maybe what you need is to find ways to streamline and/or reorganize
some of your life. Hard to say what that would look like for you, but
I'll throw out an example from my own life. I do a certain amount of
subcontracting, making small parts for player pianos. Some of that I
can do anywhere, some I need to have a place to set a hot iron (and
plug it in), some I need to be able to really concentrate on what I'm
doing. So every time I'd get a new job I'd take time to organize all
those parts of the job and design a sort of "flow" that allowed me to
maximize what little "shop time" I could get. Sometimes that meant
doing multiple jobs at the same time so I could do all the cutting at
once (say, at the playground).
You may be doing a lot of that sort of thing already! Its possible
you actually have a sort-of rhythm already, its just not a very
comfortable one right now :( Happily, as I said before, that will
change as your ds gets older - his needs and interests wont be the
same in a year!
---Meredith (Mo 7, Ray 15)
pclatha
Pam,
Online classes are a great idea, this semester, I am running a hybrid form which reduces
face to face time and moving completely to online delivery will be fabulous! Could I just
email you offline if I want to pick your brains/experience?
Thanks
Latha
--- In [email protected], Pamela Sorooshian <pamsoroosh@...>
wrote:
Online classes are a great idea, this semester, I am running a hybrid form which reduces
face to face time and moving completely to online delivery will be fabulous! Could I just
email you offline if I want to pick your brains/experience?
Thanks
Latha
--- In [email protected], Pamela Sorooshian <pamsoroosh@...>
wrote:
>
>
> On Nov 8, 2008, at 9:58 AM, Latha Poonamallee wrote:
>
> > And my classes are in the afternoon so I don't have to rush him out
> > of the house. Next semester, I have scheduled two evening classes,
> > hoping that it would be even better.
>
> I've started teaching all online courses. You might be able to get
> into that - maybe develop it for where you teach, if it isn't
> available now. Talk about flexibility! <G>
>
> -pam
>
pclatha
Meredith,
I suppose I have one! that doesn't feel comfortable yet though, I am not moving on my
research as much as I should. But that it will all change is a good idea. Plus, soon we will
have the holiday break, if I keep the babysitter on for a few hours every week during the
break, I will probably be able to make some progress, since I wouldn't be teaching....
Latha
I suppose I have one! that doesn't feel comfortable yet though, I am not moving on my
research as much as I should. But that it will all change is a good idea. Plus, soon we will
have the holiday break, if I keep the babysitter on for a few hours every week during the
break, I will probably be able to make some progress, since I wouldn't be teaching....
Latha
--- In [email protected], "Meredith" <meredith@...> wrote:
>
> --- In [email protected], Latha Poonamallee
> <pclatha@> wrote:
> >> I love being with him all the time and both of us are learning so
> much together. But I need to establish a good rhythm to make my
> (professional) work and attention to Viyan reasonably balanced (not
> to mention my health).
> *************************
>
> We've had a number of different rhythms around here, besides adding a
> teenager to the family and me going to work ft it seems like every
> time Mo (now 7) has another "developmental growth spurt" our rhythm
> changes again. So I guess I'd say that rhythms *change* and that it
> takes time to settle into a new one.
>
> Maybe what you need is to find ways to streamline and/or reorganize
> some of your life. Hard to say what that would look like for you, but
> I'll throw out an example from my own life. I do a certain amount of
> subcontracting, making small parts for player pianos. Some of that I
> can do anywhere, some I need to have a place to set a hot iron (and
> plug it in), some I need to be able to really concentrate on what I'm
> doing. So every time I'd get a new job I'd take time to organize all
> those parts of the job and design a sort of "flow" that allowed me to
> maximize what little "shop time" I could get. Sometimes that meant
> doing multiple jobs at the same time so I could do all the cutting at
> once (say, at the playground).
>
> You may be doing a lot of that sort of thing already! Its possible
> you actually have a sort-of rhythm already, its just not a very
> comfortable one right now :( Happily, as I said before, that will
> change as your ds gets older - his needs and interests wont be the
> same in a year!
>
> ---Meredith (Mo 7, Ray 15)
>
pclatha
Debra,
Thanks for your suggestions. 529 sounds like a great option. I am definitely going to look
into it.
Latha
Thanks for your suggestions. 529 sounds like a great option. I am definitely going to look
into it.
Latha
--- In [email protected], "Debra Rossing" <debra.rossing@...> wrote:
>
> As for college savings, look into the 529 plans (you don't have to use
> the plan that your state offers, you can pick whatever plan seems best
> for your particular situation, I think every state offers them as well
> as private financial institutions). A 529 is cool because it is a tax
> deferred plan designed for education use. AND here's the biggie as
> relates to your question, it does NOT have to be used by the proposed
> beneficiary. For instance, we have a 529 for DS. If he chooses not to
> use it, DH might use it for further work on his master's degree. Or, we
> can 'gift' it to a niece or a nephew for their college expenses. It
> doesn't have to be used for a standard 4 year college either - community
> college, culinary school, and so on would all "count". So, if your DS
> chooses something besides college, the money's not totally "lost" - you
> can use it, you can gift it to a relative (I think the only requirement
> is that it be a family member), he can use it for training in a field of
> interest via a technical or vocational program.
>
> Or, you could choose a non-specific savings vehicle such as a CD
> (certificate of deposit) and just sock away the funds for anything in
> the future. Any tax savings or whatever would vary depending on the
> situation obviously (consult a professional if you have questions).
>
> Deb R
>
>
> **********************************************************************
> This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential and
> intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they
> are addressed. If you have received this email in error please notify
> the system manager.
>
> This footnote also confirms that this email message has been swept by
> MIMEsweeper for the presence of computer viruses.
>
> CNC Software, Inc.
> www.mastercam.com
> **********************************************************************
>
>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
Pamela Sorooshian
On Nov 14, 2008, at 4:31 AM, pclatha wrote:
I'm also teaching a hybrid class right now, along with an entirely
online class. Next semester I'm scheduled for only online classes.
-pam
> Online classes are a great idea, this semester, I am running aSure.
> hybrid form which reduces
> face to face time and moving completely to online delivery will be
> fabulous! Could I just
> email you offline if I want to pick your brains/experience?
I'm also teaching a hybrid class right now, along with an entirely
online class. Next semester I'm scheduled for only online classes.
-pam