Kelly Lovejoy

Joyce and I have both mentioned conferences recently.




I can't tell you how helpful they can be in actually SEEING it live, in action---and for convincing spouses.




Years ago when I started the Live and Learn Unschooling Conference, it was the "only game in town." People came from all over the country, Canada, Europe, Mexico, and Australia. Now, there's something almost ever six weeks or so. Either full-blown conferences, gatherings, Non-Cons (non-conferences), or parties. No joke! Something every month.




For example:




Last weekend, my family went to GA to visit friends. We're in TN for ARGH! next weekend. We go to Atlanta again (for Mannheim Steamroller) in Nov. Everyone's invited to SC (my house---Danny Schmidt house concert) in Dec. We're celebrating again at my house in SC in Jan ---Cameron's 21 birthday party!. Hundreds of families will be in OH at the Waterpark Gathering in Feb. And that's all BEFORE the conference "seasons" in the spring and fall. Oh---and my family is missing a Non-Con in the NW next weekend as well as the Costa Rica conference in Dec.




There's still room in Costa Rica. Contact Sharon at Pura Vida. There's still a cabin available at ARGH! in TN Nov 2-4. Ask Ren. Anyone's invited to my house for the Danny House Concert Dec 20. And we'd LOVE a houseful for Cameron's birthday Jan 23-25. PLENTY of rooms left at the Waterpark Gathering Feb 2-7---contact Carol or Kimberly.







Coming up we have:




ARGH! in TN

The Pura Vida Conference in Costa Rica

The WaterPark Gathering in Ohio

The Great Big Happy Life Conference in NJ


The Toronto Joyful Living Conference, Canada

The LIFE is Good Conference in WA state

The SHINE Gathering in Niagara Falls, Canada

The Good Vibrations Conference in San Diego, CA

The NE Unschooling Conference near Boston, MA

The Alphabet Soup Conference in Alberta, Canada

The Myrtle Beach Gathering in SC

and the Unschooling Adventure Cruise and Conference




I could be missing one or two. If you know of others I've missed or forgotten, please add them!




These are all spin-offs of Live and Learn or of each other.




In addition, Arizona, California, and Illinois also have *very* unschooly-friendly homeschooling conferences. NC has their FLT gatherings. Non-Cons are springing up all over the place. 

There are so many opportunities to meet unschoolers now---there's really no excuse NOT to!!!


~Kelly





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[email protected]

**I could be missing one or two. If you know of others I've missed or
forgotten, please add them!**

An easy way to keep up with conferences across the country is to join the
Unschooling Circuit Riders yahoogroup. You'll get an email every two weeks with
dates and links to the websites of every upcoming unschooling conference
opportunity (well, every one known to the list mama, anyway).

It's a VERY low traffic list, just conference announcements and the regular
upcoming listing.

And conference planners, if you send me information on your con as you know
it, I'll make sure it gets publicity on the Circuit Riders list.

Deborah in IL
Unschooling Circuit Riders list mama



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diana jenner

We're having a Halloween Non-Con in Corvallis, OR!!
We'll be dressing up for downtown trick-or-treating (it's the most amazing
downtown event, ever!) and then on to some neighborhood candy collecting. On
Saturday, 11/01, we're having a pot-luck & Hayden's breaking out his new
Rock Band for everyone to enjoy!
We've got kids from 4-19 already included, there's room for MORE!!
~diana :)
xoxoxoxo
hannahbearski.blogspot.com
hannahsashes.blogspot.com
dianas365.blogspot.com


On Sat, Oct 25, 2008 at 6:29 AM, Kelly Lovejoy <kbcdlovejo@...> wrote:

>
>
> Joyce and I have both mentioned conferences recently.
>
> I can't tell you how helpful they can be in actually SEEING it live, in
> action---and for convincing spouses.
>
> Years ago when I started the Live and Learn Unschooling Conference, it was
> the "only game in town." People came from all over the country, Canada,
> Europe, Mexico, and Australia. Now, there's something almost ever six weeks
> or so. Either full-blown conferences, gatherings, Non-Cons
> (non-conferences), or parties. No joke! Something every month.
>
> For example:
>
> Last weekend, my family went to GA to visit friends. We're in TN for ARGH!
> next weekend. We go to Atlanta again (for Mannheim Steamroller) in Nov.
> Everyone's invited to SC (my house---Danny Schmidt house concert) in Dec.
> We're celebrating again at my house in SC in Jan ---Cameron's 21 birthday
> party!. Hundreds of families will be in OH at the Waterpark Gathering in
> Feb. And that's all BEFORE the conference "seasons" in the spring and fall.
> Oh---and my family is missing a Non-Con in the NW next weekend as well as
> the Costa Rica conference in Dec.
>
> There's still room in Costa Rica. Contact Sharon at Pura Vida. There's
> still a cabin available at ARGH! in TN Nov 2-4. Ask Ren. Anyone's invited to
> my house for the Danny House Concert Dec 20. And we'd LOVE a houseful for
> Cameron's birthday Jan 23-25. PLENTY of rooms left at the Waterpark
> Gathering Feb 2-7---contact Carol or Kimberly.
>
> Coming up we have:
>
> ARGH! in TN
>
> The Pura Vida Conference in Costa Rica
>
> The WaterPark Gathering in Ohio
>
> The Great Big Happy Life Conference in NJ
>
> The Toronto Joyful Living Conference, Canada
>
> The LIFE is Good Conference in WA state
>
> The SHINE Gathering in Niagara Falls, Canada
>
> The Good Vibrations Conference in San Diego, CA
>
> The NE Unschooling Conference near Boston, MA
>
> The Alphabet Soup Conference in Alberta, Canada
>
> The Myrtle Beach Gathering in SC
>
> and the Unschooling Adventure Cruise and Conference
>
> I could be missing one or two. If you know of others I've missed or
> forgotten, please add them!
>
> These are all spin-offs of Live and Learn or of each other.
>
> In addition, Arizona, California, and Illinois also have *very*
> unschooly-friendly homeschooling conferences. NC has their FLT gatherings.
> Non-Cons are springing up all over the place.
>
> There are so many opportunities to meet unschoolers now---there's really no
> excuse NOT to!!!
>
>
>


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Sherri

I wrote the situation was resolved as I was okay. I do have vertigo and it
isn't going away. Can I politely ask her to pick up her wrapper off the
floor? She throws clothing everywhere, wrappers, leaves plates etc
everywhere. It comes to the point you can't walk. Prior to this if I were
ill and I am chronically ill I would have said I need you to help Mommy
there's lots of stuff on the floor.



I took my post back as I was feeling intimated by the way I had written it
and didn't want to get a lot of you're a bad parent advice.



Sherri being really honest.





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Joyce Fetteroll

On Oct 26, 2008, at 1:01 PM, Sherri wrote:

> and didn't want to get a lot of you're a bad parent advice.

I've never seen anyone tell someone on one of these lists they're a
bad parent. One sign of a good parent is recognizing where things
aren't going right and asking for help. A bad parent is selfish and
doesn't care. Anyone asking questions here obviously cares!

> Can I politely ask her to pick up her wrapper off the
> floor?

Of course.

Unless you mean "politely" as most conventional parents mean, when it
isn't a real question: saying "Would you please?" in a nice voice
when they really mean "Pick that up."

Ask means one acceptable answer is no.

> She throws clothing everywhere, wrappers, leaves plates etc
> everywhere.

My 17 yo can do that too. It's totally unconscious. Her mind is
elsewhere when she does it.

If you're there, say "Wrapper."

More trash cans around.

Hampers in the areas she's most likely to take off clothes.

What about one of those long reach grabbers? That would make it
easier for you to pick up when you need to. (And I bet she'd like to
use it too ;-)

> I would have said I need you to help Mommy
> there's lots of stuff on the floor.

My daughter has a hard time seeing what needs picked up too. I
rephrased it as "I'd like to be able to vaccuum." That translated to
something she understood.

Being respectful doesn't mean never asking. If you and a guest were
up and you were gathering dishes, would you hesitate to say "Hey, can
you grab that dish for me?"

When we retain ownership of the task, we will ask differently than
when we're trying to get someone else to see where they're falling
short. When we ask knowing they can say no, our tone is different.

Joyce

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Verna

Can I politely ask her to pick up her wrapper off the
> floor? She throws clothing everywhere, wrappers, leaves plates etc
> everywhere. It comes to the point you can't walk. Prior to this if
I were
> ill and I am chronically ill I would have said I need you to help
Mommy
> there's lots of stuff on the floor.

I dont think there is anything wrong with you asking.

Sherri

Thank you Joyce,



My husband and I have always given Faith choices. I have always insisted
Faith chose her own food or be actively involved in the dinner menu. We
have always had unlimited candy around and because we do so, it is rarely
touched. My sister feels we have created a very spoiled child, very self
centered. A friend actually told me that she thinks Faith should go to
school as she thinks the world revolves around her. I told her she needed
to understand, our world does revolve around Faith's needs and wants.



She is an only child and I think it is natural for that to happen. Last
night I watched the 3 year old across the street. We went over to her house
as it was easier for when she fell asleep. My DD was very happy about the
whole thing, until Sarah climbed on me and didn't want to share my lap and
fell asleep. Then she made it clear she didn't like it when another child
was on my lap. We have been discussing adopting another child and I told
her if that happened there would be occasions where I would need to hold the
other child and maybe not her could, how would she feel. Last night she
said she didn't want another child, she only wants my attention.



I personally feel she has the biggest right of all to say yes or no to
another sibling. She is the one who is going to have to share her Daddy and
me.



Sherri



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Joyce Fetteroll

On Oct 26, 2008, at 2:08 PM, Sherri wrote:

> I have always insisted
> Faith chose her own food or be actively involved in the dinner menu.

Perhaps by insisted you mean "stood firmly by your resolve to provide"?

If in your thoughts you're labeling what you do "insisting" by
putting it the "insisting" box you can end up treating it like
something to be insisted on. Just something to think about.

Not all kids like a lot of choices. It can be overwhelming. They'd
much rather hear "Do you want a hot dog or hamburger?" knowing that
neither is also a choice, than to hear "Have any of the dozen choices
you want."

That might not be your daughter, but it might apply to someone else
who is reading.

> I told her she needed
> to understand, our world does revolve around Faith's needs and wants.

Many parents come to radical unschooling with having had their needs
set aside for their parents "more important" needs. The arrive with
the vague question of "When *is* it my turn?" as they try to grasp
what they want by doing what their parents did to them: trivializing
their kids needs to get their own needs met.

This may not be what you mean, but I do know it's a point of
confusion for a lot of new unschoolers. It's helpful for kids to see
us working to get our own needs met. This can be hard because we *do*
need to set aside a lot of what we want in order to help our kids get
what they want and need. But no one should be thinking a child who is
asking for a banana at 10PM means mom drives to the grocery store at
that hour! Hey, it could be a fun adventure if you feel like it :-)
but it's not the only choice. You can say "Let's put that down on the
shopping list and make a run to the store in the morning. Let's see
if we can find a substitute that will work until then."

The key is balance. Let them know their wants and needs are being
taken serious and you have every intention of helping them. But do
let them see treating your own needs seriously too. Seeing others as
important is as important to model as seeing ourselves as important.
But it takes a lot of self examination to figure out where meeting
our needs is imposing on them.

Joyce

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