'Explaining unschooling'
Vickisue Gray
This post hit home for me as my doctor recently 'suggested' I refrain from using the word 'unschooling'. He said the term gave him images of child neglect even though he knows it to be a positive way for children learn.
Lol, the under statement of my day!
I've grown so comfortable over the last few years with unschooling, that I use the term whenever someone asks me about our homeschooling style. See, my son really blossomed under full blown radical unschooling. I LOVE all the advise this group gives and I've watched it work! Now I'm learning to curtail my enthusiasm as 'unschooling' implies 'neglect' to the narrow minded.
Yep!
Yep! We still have our moments on this one. My hubby has gone completely onboard then he'll revert to the disciplinarian, demanding bedtimes, proof of learning, etc. I send him positive information of how well older unschoolers are doing and such and he relaxes again.
Great advice! Thank you ladies for all the wonderful and helpful information you provide.
Vicki
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>>>>Explaining unschooling to an unsupportive family member can betricky. <<<<< (add Doctor, neighbor, friend, librarian .....most people....)
Lol, the under statement of my day!
I've grown so comfortable over the last few years with unschooling, that I use the term whenever someone asks me about our homeschooling style. See, my son really blossomed under full blown radical unschooling. I LOVE all the advise this group gives and I've watched it work! Now I'm learning to curtail my enthusiasm as 'unschooling' implies 'neglect' to the narrow minded.
>>>>>That might be best discussed as a separate topic, maybe evenby separating concerns. <<<<
Yep!
>>>>>Your husband really needs to be on board with the parenting style or your relationship can have problems which will also affect the children. <<<<
Yep! We still have our moments on this one. My hubby has gone completely onboard then he'll revert to the disciplinarian, demanding bedtimes, proof of learning, etc. I send him positive information of how well older unschoolers are doing and such and he relaxes again.
>>>>You might want to try slowing down the transition into total life unschooling. Read about it and discuss it with your husband. He'll be working through his own issues just like you're having to face and work through your own.<<<<
Great advice! Thank you ladies for all the wonderful and helpful information you provide.
Vicki
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Deb
--- In [email protected], Vickisue Gray
<vickisue_gray@...> wrote:
images of child neglect even though he knows it to be a positive way
for children learn.
community most of the time. We'll use life learning more often "DS
learns through living" If they want more info, I'll mention that up
until age 5 and after age 18, people follow their interests and learn
in a whole variety of ways, with parents or other older folks acting
as facilitators and mentors as desired. But, for some reason, from
ages 5 to 18 we think people have to do things a different way,
called "school". We've chosen to not change what worked before he was
5 and what will work once he's "an adult". Most folks (particularly
grandparent type people) 'get' this idea, particularly when we apply
it directly to them as in the good things they did with their kids
before they turned 5 and all the learning they themselves have done
as adults.
--Deb
<vickisue_gray@...> wrote:
>refrain from using the word 'unschooling'. He said the term gave him
> This post hit home for me as my doctor recently 'suggested' I
images of child neglect even though he knows it to be a positive way
for children learn.
>We don't use the term unschooling much outside the homeschooling
community most of the time. We'll use life learning more often "DS
learns through living" If they want more info, I'll mention that up
until age 5 and after age 18, people follow their interests and learn
in a whole variety of ways, with parents or other older folks acting
as facilitators and mentors as desired. But, for some reason, from
ages 5 to 18 we think people have to do things a different way,
called "school". We've chosen to not change what worked before he was
5 and what will work once he's "an adult". Most folks (particularly
grandparent type people) 'get' this idea, particularly when we apply
it directly to them as in the good things they did with their kids
before they turned 5 and all the learning they themselves have done
as adults.
--Deb
[email protected]
-----Original Message-----
From: Vickisue Gray <vickisue_gray@...>
This post hit home for me as my doctor recently 'suggested' I refrain
from using
the word 'unschooling'. He said the term gave him images of child
neglect even
though he knows it to be a positive way for children learn.
-=-=-=-=-
I thought the same thing when I heard the Germans using the word
"unerzogen" as a moniker for unschooling in Germany. It freaked me out
a bit. *I* translate it as "feral." It brings up very negative gut
reaction from me---but I *think* that was the point. <G>
Un-schooled *can* seem very negative---in that "well schooled" is
considered a good thing here. <G>
But since my car is a rolling advertisement for unschooling, I get
asked a LOT about it (one of the bumper stickers actually *says* "Ask
Me About Unschooling"---so...you know...I'm...ummmm... *asking* for it!
<BWG>). And I like describing it---and after eight years of describing
it, I'm pretty good at it. <G>
And since it's been in the news a lot lately, it's important to *me*
that folks don't get the wrong idea about it.
I haven't met anyone in these last five or six years who doesn't walk
away at least a *little* more...ummmm...."schooled" about it. More
educated. More informed. More knowledgeable. Wiser.
For *me*, it's important that I inform. I don't *want* all the
misinformation that swirls around unschooling. I d
on't want people
*afraid* of it. In fact, I usually open with "Yeah---we scare people."
Most folks think they're too "big" to be scared, so they're
automatically more open to hear more about it cause they want to *show*
me that they're tougher than that. That unschooling doesn't scare
*them*! <G>
Within a short bit of time---they may not "buy" it, but they aren't as
fearful either. And they've met someone who is confidently
unschooling---and proud of it. Even better is if one of the boys is
with me: I can show that they don't grow more three heads or anything.
They're not "sheltered" or "stupid." They can hold conversations and
look you in the eyes. That's pretty impressive for some folks.
Writing here and at the other lists before GAVE me that confidence. At
first, it's hard to do in person; but if you take the time to formulate
*your* words in writing, over time, it starts flowing more easily when
you're speaking too. Reading was one thing. But writing online helped
me *understand* unschooling better, so I could explain it better.
Like----if I can make my fingers write the words, I must have a better
grasp of what I'm thinking. That translates to the spoken word too.
It's easier to explain when it's solid in your head. Maybe it's just
me---but I've seen it happen again and again on these lists (Katherine
is the most recent example! <g>).
It's certainly not up to everyone to be a spok
esman for unschooling!
<G> But I'm comfortable talking about it to strangers---and DO---a lot!
And I want them aware that it IS an option---and a GOOD one. And to not
be afraid of it.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
From: Vickisue Gray <vickisue_gray@...>
This post hit home for me as my doctor recently 'suggested' I refrain
from using
the word 'unschooling'. He said the term gave him images of child
neglect even
though he knows it to be a positive way for children learn.
-=-=-=-=-
I thought the same thing when I heard the Germans using the word
"unerzogen" as a moniker for unschooling in Germany. It freaked me out
a bit. *I* translate it as "feral." It brings up very negative gut
reaction from me---but I *think* that was the point. <G>
Un-schooled *can* seem very negative---in that "well schooled" is
considered a good thing here. <G>
But since my car is a rolling advertisement for unschooling, I get
asked a LOT about it (one of the bumper stickers actually *says* "Ask
Me About Unschooling"---so...you know...I'm...ummmm... *asking* for it!
<BWG>). And I like describing it---and after eight years of describing
it, I'm pretty good at it. <G>
And since it's been in the news a lot lately, it's important to *me*
that folks don't get the wrong idea about it.
I haven't met anyone in these last five or six years who doesn't walk
away at least a *little* more...ummmm...."schooled" about it. More
educated. More informed. More knowledgeable. Wiser.
For *me*, it's important that I inform. I don't *want* all the
misinformation that swirls around unschooling. I d
on't want people
*afraid* of it. In fact, I usually open with "Yeah---we scare people."
Most folks think they're too "big" to be scared, so they're
automatically more open to hear more about it cause they want to *show*
me that they're tougher than that. That unschooling doesn't scare
*them*! <G>
Within a short bit of time---they may not "buy" it, but they aren't as
fearful either. And they've met someone who is confidently
unschooling---and proud of it. Even better is if one of the boys is
with me: I can show that they don't grow more three heads or anything.
They're not "sheltered" or "stupid." They can hold conversations and
look you in the eyes. That's pretty impressive for some folks.
Writing here and at the other lists before GAVE me that confidence. At
first, it's hard to do in person; but if you take the time to formulate
*your* words in writing, over time, it starts flowing more easily when
you're speaking too. Reading was one thing. But writing online helped
me *understand* unschooling better, so I could explain it better.
Like----if I can make my fingers write the words, I must have a better
grasp of what I'm thinking. That translates to the spoken word too.
It's easier to explain when it's solid in your head. Maybe it's just
me---but I've seen it happen again and again on these lists (Katherine
is the most recent example! <g>).
It's certainly not up to everyone to be a spok
esman for unschooling!
<G> But I'm comfortable talking about it to strangers---and DO---a lot!
And I want them aware that it IS an option---and a GOOD one. And to not
be afraid of it.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
Debra Rossing
> Even better is if one of the boys is with me:Yup, even better is if the question comes up AFTER whomever has spent
some time in the presence of DS. Sometimes he'll chime in with
"E=MCsquared" (and he'll tell them what the letters stand for and all)
then, with a grin say "that's just to show you can learn stuff without
going to school" (cause he learned it from Jimmy Neutron). That usually
gets a grin (his grins are contagious) and he roams away and I'll
continue the discussion if the other person wants to continue it.
Deb
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