swissarmy_wife

My oldest, almost 10 bought a bike pump yesterday. He blew up his
tires this morning and fixed his bike. Then told me where he was
going to ride it. I wasn't comfortable with that. I tried to engage
in a discussion of how he could ride his bike on the road, and I could
feel more comfortable about it. I'm uncomfortable because:

-my road is semi-busy
-there is no sidewalk
-he isn't a strong bike rider yet, not having ridden very often. he's
still a little wobbly and unaware of things around him.
-he wants to race down a street while I time him from home. (we do
that when he goes for walks) All the while crossing side streets.
-my husband's stepbrother was struck and killed by a car when he was a
kid. It wasn't his fault. But, if he had been wearing a helmet he
would have lived.

I offered to take him to buy him a new helmet (at that moment).

He says NO helmet. It's uncomfortable and and makes him look stupid.
This was beyond me. I didn't know he cared so much! I offered to
find him the coolest the helmet we could find and told him that I
understood that. Nope.

I'm not sure what to do here. Lately we have had lots of struggles.
3rd baby is due today. He is very stressed out. He has been acting
very differently. He has been pushing against me a lot. He's a high
needs child and very worried that his needs aren't going to be met
anymore. I would go as far to say that he's angry with me for being
pregnant.

I WANT him to ride his bike independently. Yet I want him to be safe.

Help please! Thanks.

Zoa Conner

Maybe the folks at the local bike shop (do you have one?) can help with the
comfort and cool issues. Maybe riding with a local bike club or other kids
will help with the riding issues.

Zoa
----------------
Zoa Conner, PhD
Physicist and Organic Learning Mother
zoaconner@...



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

BRIAN POLIKOWSKY

Is there a law requiring the use of bike helmets where you live?
My dh's helmed needed to be ordered ( he has a big head) and he went bking anyway 10 years ago.
He was going down a hill really fast on his road bike and a herd of dear jumped right in front of him and he
was knocked down, fractured his skull in little pieces and had a roof make a hole in his skull.
He was in the ICU for 6 days and now he cannot smell or taste.
Your kid is not going to be doing anything like that ...going 40 miles per hour down a hill.
When we where kids we never wore a helmet at all and biked everywhere and never had a problem.
Can you take him to a local park or trail without car traffic, look for really cool helmets.
Tour De France starteda a couple of days ago.
Myabe he would be interrested to see that. Some racers use helmets, some don't.
Some use for sprints and not climbing.
Lots to talk about.

 
Alex Polikowsky
http://polykow.blogspot.com/
 
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingmn/
 






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juillet727

Hi--
Reading about a thing like this always makes me feel all
self-righteous as a parent and want to pull some attitude like, "You
HAVE to wear a helmet! That's ridiculous not to do that! It's the
law!" And on and on. Not exactly conducive to a good relationship with
a kid. Good thing I have a filter on myself! My fears can make me
obnoxious. <g>

That said, I would first look to see if it was the law for a 10 yr old
to wear a helmet. Just because it's good to know the laws and what the
consequences are.

Maybe look for a safe area for your son to do a timed ride? Like a
race by himself? A loop around a big park or a large, empty parking
lot with obstacles. Talking to some friendly personnel at a bike store
might give him a chance to relate to "peers" with a common interest.
Especially if their older and experienced. And they might have some
ideas on natural loops around town or something. Information coming
from peers without mom's input can sound different and fresh. At least
for my son it does.

It sounds like, maybe, your son is needing some reassurance with the
baby arriving soon? Some extra snuggles? This is just a guess on my part.

I have an almost 9yr old who is very snuggly still and loves having
down time with me and talking time with me. And yet he really needs
his space too, a chance to stretch his boundaries and challenge
himself, so it's a matter of setting that up for him to do safely. Do
you know what I mean?

My son doesn't want my help at all (with his interactions) when he's
on xbox live, but he'll come to bed and ask me to "interview" him
about what he played that day. And it's then, in the course of
conversation, that he'll bring up situations that he needs help with
(mean players, friends who don't play fair, etc.).

I have to go right now--just got home from work, but maybe some of
this makes sense. It might be a little jumbled I think. :)
~~Juillet



--- In [email protected], "swissarmy_wife"
<heatherbean@...> wrote:
>
> My oldest, almost 10 bought a bike pump yesterday. He blew up his
> tires this morning and fixed his bike. Then told me where he was
> going to ride it. I wasn't comfortable with that. I tried to engage
> in a discussion of how he could ride his bike on the road, and I could
> feel more comfortable about it. I'm uncomfortable because:
>
> -my road is semi-busy
> -there is no sidewalk
> -he isn't a strong bike rider yet, not having ridden very often. he's
> still a little wobbly and unaware of things around him.
> -he wants to race down a street while I time him from home. (we do
> that when he goes for walks) All the while crossing side streets.
> -my husband's stepbrother was struck and killed by a car when he was a
> kid. It wasn't his fault. But, if he had been wearing a helmet he
> would have lived.
>
> I offered to take him to buy him a new helmet (at that moment).
>
> He says NO helmet. It's uncomfortable and and makes him look stupid.
> This was beyond me. I didn't know he cared so much! I offered to
> find him the coolest the helmet we could find and told him that I
> understood that. Nope.
>
> I'm not sure what to do here. Lately we have had lots of struggles.
> 3rd baby is due today. He is very stressed out. He has been acting
> very differently. He has been pushing against me a lot. He's a high
> needs child and very worried that his needs aren't going to be met
> anymore. I would go as far to say that he's angry with me for being
> pregnant.
>
> I WANT him to ride his bike independently. Yet I want him to be safe.
>
> Help please! Thanks.
>

logan_rose_porter

What about the kind of helmets skateboarders and bladers wear? The kind of punk style with
skulls, or flames or whatever. They dont stick of your head like regular helmets....and Im not
a 9 year old boy- but the teenagers seem to think they're pretty cool in them! :P

[email protected]

-----Original Message-----
From: BRIAN POLIKOWSKY <polykowholsteins@...>

Tour De France starteda a couple of days ago.
Myabe he would be interrested to see that. Some racers use helmets,
some don't.
Some use for sprints and not climbing.
Lots to talk about.

-=-=-=-=-

New rule in 2005 for Le Tour de France: riders can be fined for riding
without helmets at any time during the race (previously, they could
remove them on finishing climbs).

The death in 1995 of Fabio Casartelli was what prompted this change.

I doubt you'll see any riders helmetless anymore at the Tour.


~Kelly, Tour-junkie

Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org

BRIAN POLIKOWSKY

you are right! I forgot about it!
I have been watching for so many years and for so long many did not use a helmet.
It used to give me the creeps when they where going downhill....

 
Alex Polikowsky
http://polykow.blogspot.com/
 
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unschoolingmn/

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