Brushing teeth
Joyce Fetteroll
This is something I gathered for the No More Spanking list and
thought I'd share it.
This is *not* about ways to get kids to brush teeth. It isn't even
solutions to the problem of getting kids to brush teeth. What it is,
is how parents who practice mindful parenting and respecting their
kids go about finding ways to help their kids have clean teeth.
What's important is not the solutions (though there are several that
might work for people) but the process of being a child's partner.
If anyone has ideas to add, post them to the list :-)
Joyce
============ Question ============
Jamie
Does anyone have ideas to encourage my 4 1/2 yo to brush his teeth?
He has always resisted it and, because of this and acid reflux, has
had to have major dental work done. Just so you know, he HATES it
and it is a true battle of wills, with me holding him tightly and
brushing while he screams. (This was obviously before we started
unschooling and I just don't know what to do.)
============ Replies ============
Jodi Bezzola
Isn't it funny when a really big deal turns out to be about something
so simple?!? I laughed when I read this, because a few weeks ago
Jade (one of my 3 1/2 year old twin girls) told me she didn't ever
want to brush because the toothpaste is 'howibwe'...it was kids minty
something or other. After she told me that we went out and found
Tom's apricot flavour (tastes like jam) and she's been brushing non-
stop ever since. Oh, and they also got to pick out a fancy motorized
Dora toothbrush which delights them to no end :).
Nicole Willoughby
I encourage my girls to brush and buy them fun toothbrushes, child
friendly floss, moutwash etc. At their recent dental visits dd8 has 5
cavities shell be going back to have filled and dd 5 has 3.
Now my autistic son who almost never allows us to brush his teeth
went for his check-up last week and once again has 0 cavities.
Jeanette Crichton
I have always looked for cartoon characters in my kids mouth while I
brush their teeth. We have looked for Spiderman, Batman, Star Wars
characters, Backyardigans, etc. Sometimes it gets a little difficult
because the kids giggle so much : ) In the beginning I don't even
called it brushing teeth. I make up some sort of silly name for it,
and I very dramatically "play" with their teeth and the left over
"food" in their mouth. Tooth brushing is just another playful moment
in our house.
Schuyler
It is interesting, I've just been doing a quick and cursory
exploration of the world of oral bacteria via google and found this:
http://www.db.od.mah.se/car/data/kohlermut.html which shows that the
earlier you get mutans streptococci the more prone to caries/cavities
you are, with absolutely no discussion of how much you brush or floss
your teeth. Here's an abstract about the natural history of
Streptoccus sanguinis (a benign oral bacteria) http://iai.asm.org/cgi/
content/abstract/68/7/4018 I think I like it most because it refers
to oral bacteria as "indigenous biota of the human oral cavity". Oh,
how I love science!! There is this talk abstract: http://
iadr.confex.com/iadr/2002SanDiego/techprogram/abstract_18332.htm
which found no difference in colonization of mutans streptococci in
caries free Swedish teenagers and caries prevelant Swedish teenagers.
Similar finding here: http://jdr.iadrjournals.org/cgi/content/
abstract/77/10/1851 with the added comment that it isn't diet that
is doing it. Oh, I could do this for a long time.
It's really cool. It isn't scary, or something to be used to scare a
child with, they are cavities, holes in your teeth caused by acids.
The bacteria, the indigenous biota, are just living there, they are
indigenous. Well, they are indigenous from about 30 months old, on
average. Yes, toothbrushing makes a difference http://
content.karger.com/ProdukteDB/produkte.asp?
Aktion=ShowAbstract&ArtikelNr=\ 16503&Ausgabe=225458&ProduktNr=224219
(an old paper, 1999, but cool for the British social class stuff --
I'm assuming that's what the manual versus non-manual mention is
about). A big difference. But it isn't going to keep you clear of
caries if you are prone to getting them.
Hard cheese is supposed to be quite good for regulating the
population of mutans streptococci, quick search shows that
lactobacilli tends to keep populations of mutans streptococci in
check. Xylitol has been shown to reduce plaque and when mother's chew
it for the first couple of years of their child's life the
colonization of the child's teeth by mutans streptococci is delayed
and thus caries are less likely to occur.
Carron Armstrong
It turned out that he just didn't like the toothpaste. He had
switched from a fruit flavored kid toothpaste to a minty adult
paste. He discovered that he hates mint, but didn't realize that he
could just switch back to his old toothpaste. Now he uses that Crest
citrus flavor, which has some mint in it, but he doesn't seem to mind
that.
Jodi Bezzola
[She] told me she didn't ever want to brush because the toothpaste is
'howibwe'...it was kids minty something or other. After she told me
that we went out and found Tom's apricot flavour (tastes like jam)
and she's been brushing non-stop ever since. Oh, and they also got
to pick out a fancy motorized Dora toothbrush which delights them to
no end :).
Alex P
ow about using xylitol mints and gum instead of brushing?? check
xylitol.org
Zoa Conner
Or peelu gum...
Karen Swanay
if your child has weak enamel over-brushing can CAUSE cavitites as
well. I have strong enamel and take horrid care of my teeth. I just
turned 37 and have no cavities. Both my parents have full dentures
and both brothers have mouthes full of fillings. But I can't for the
life of me see telling a child that the "bugs" will bore through the
teeth until the child screams in pain will bring you closer or make
the child think you are nice. FWIW I'd leave the kid alone. Tell
the kid about brushing, why we do it and then leave it be. My kids
are not forced to brush their teeth. But they have several flavors
of toothpaste, different brushes, and gauze pads to use instead of
brushes if they wish. It's their mouth...I leave them alone about it.
Ulrike Haupt
To eat an apple or carrot or piece of fullcorn bread cleanses the
teeth good enough.
Jodi Bezzola
I have floosed and brushed every day for my entire 41 year old life,
and yet every trip to the dentist shows up yet another cavity or some
other form of decay. It's just the way I'm built. My husband on the
other hand never flosses, never brushes at night and has never had a
cavity.
Lisa B
I have a child in the exact situation.... I made sure to provide lots
of implements ... interesting power brushes, milder toothpaste (or
even no toothpaste!) and just modeled good dental hygiene. Making
it a battle isn't going to accomplish much other than proving to him
that you don't trust him and that he can't trust you. Forcing a
child who has what sounds like sensory issues and has a history of
dental issues is really setting him up for difficulty. My son has
gotten better about brushing now that he's noticed that sometimes
people have bad breath... he's 6 now and will say "wow mom you need
to brush" I always say "yes I had garlic for dinner " hoping that
he will connect that some foods make your breath stinkier and that
some things like poppy seeds, strawberries, blueberries etc make your
teeth look icky if you don't brush. Ultimately I leave it up to
him ....I can fix his teeth but his spirit might be trickier!
Ren
The point was that it often doesn't help to overstate consequences to
children, because it can erode trust if the outcome isn't what Mom
said it would be. I think the use of color tablets or other items
might be great for some people! The question is whether you should
tell children they'll get cavities and pain if they don't brush.
Because some will rarely brush and never get a cavity, others will
brush faithfully and get lots! We don't want to mislead children in
order to get them to do something. That's all.
Jodi
I just hand them their toothbrushes with toothpaste on them in the
tub and they brush. I suggest teeth brushing every morning/every
evening and sometimes they go for it and sometimes they don't.
Caren
I am 42. I can eat as much or as little as I please, of whatever I
please. I can brush my teeth or not. I can even DRIVE to the fast-
food place when I want, and eat what I want there. I'm the one with
the debit card, so I can buy what I choose at the grocery store. Why
aren't I choosing *only* sweets and Dorito's, and filling my cart
with stuff that's barely food? Because I prefer how I feel when I eat
food as close to the source as possible, mindfully. *I* feel *better*
when I eat that way. Why do I brush my teeth? Because my mouth feels
better when I do, and actually, I've found my mood is better, too. I
found that out by *not* brushing my teeth. I had to give *myself*
total freedom when we started this journey, too. Now - *everything*
is a choice. Everything. I don't do things because my mom told me it
would be good for me. I do things because I WANT to, because of how
my choices make me feel.
Joyce
When I was a kid I remember being sent to brush my teeth alone and it
took *hours*. Okay, not really ;-) It felt like hours!
So what I did with my daughter was to do it with her. We talked and
joked. I made sure she had a brush and toothpaste she liked. I'm sure
I must have mentioned preventing cavities in there at some point.
Eventually it became automatic. Sometimes she would say she didn't
feel like brushing. I'd say don't. And she'd say what if I get a
cavity and we'd talk about the difference between habitually not
brushing and skipping once. I can't remember her choosing not to
brush but it would have been okay if she had.
swissarmywife
For brushing teeth we've made it as easy as possible. We used to
brush our teeth together, now the boys prefer to brush together.
Some kids like a small mirror to watch themselves. Toothbrushes and
toothpaste can be moved. Another bathroom? Kitchen sink? We also
let the kids pick out their brushes. Right now they really like
their electric power ranger brushes! We also buy natural toothpaste
(Tom's of Maine kids strawberry) which has a mild flavor they don't
seem to mind. We also bought flossers, rather than using regular
dental floss. My older son has had experience with cavities, so he
doesn't seem to mind brushing and flossing so much anymore. for my
younger one (3) as long as I don't push he will let me help him out
once a week or so. the other times he does it himself. I know its
not perfect, but we have sort of made a game with the "EEEE!
AAAAAHHHH! OOOOHHHH!" mouth shapes. :-)
mimiphilomena
We use non foaming, non flouride toothpaste (no spitting required),
so brushing and flossing teeth happens in bed, right before story. I
read a story and maybe rub her back a bit, and she is out.
polykowholsteins
http://www.angelfire.com/az/sthurston/xylitol_natural_sweetener.html
"...Xylitol is a dentist's dream. It reverses all these destructive
effects of sugar on oral health. Xylitol is non-fermentable and
therefore cannot be converted to acids by oral bacteria, thus it
helps to restore a proper alkaline/acid balance in the mouth. This
alkaline environment is inhospitable to all the destructive bacteria,
especially the worst variety, Streptococcus mutans. It also inhibits
plaque formation...."
Susan
Ah, yes! My son frequently forgets where he was headed / what he was
going to do and it happens with teeth brushing, too. There is much
less stress if we go to do it together. I give him a piggyback ride
to the bathroom, sometimes he brushes his teeth and sometimes he
wants me to do it. I don't mind helping him brush at all, I think it
helps him figure out the sensations and movements of what a good
teeth brushing feels like. We talk about each part of his mouth and
he asks questions, etc. Since he's fiercely independent in many ways,
it's a treat for me to be able to do something *for* him. We pause to
chit-chat and giggle. Sometimes we'll brush our teeth together or
he'll want to brush mine for me.
If told him to go do it he'd make it halfway down the hallway and
start playing. I'd get frustrated, remind him again, direct him
toward the bathroom, spot him in the living room a few moments later
and discover he still hadn't brushed his teeth. I'd send him down the
hallway again with my patience rapidly decreasing, and so on until
eventually I was close to yelling and all but dragging him into the
bathroom or on the verge of making threats like "no bedtime story" etc.
There is a principal behind the act of teeth brushing - taking care
of ourselves so we stay healthy. Both ways are trying to meet this
goal. One way tries to figure out how to make it happen in the most
joyful, non-coercive way. There are no commands, rules or punishments
involved. It does, however, require me to be *present* and actively
engaged with him to accomplish the brushing of teeth.
The other way is the opposite. It starts with me thinking I can issue
a command and have it obeyed and that should be the extent of my
involvement. Every time he needs redirecting my frustration level
grows because I'm not suppose to have to intervene - I said "do it"
and that should have been it. I choose to turn it into a battle of
wills and to take his inability to complete the task on my timetable
as a sign of disrespect.
Which way is respectful towards the child and is more pleasant for
both of us? Which way is ultimately more hands-on? Which way honors
the relationship?
Meredith
**Of course, I kindly remind him to brush his teeth**
One alternative would be to talk about his breath without going
straight to the solution - I forget that myself and tend to go
straight to solutions. After all, my solutions are fabulous! Why
wouldn't anyone just want me to tell them what to.... oh, oops.
Part of supporting autonomy is giving our kids the space to think of
some of those fabulous solutions on their own - the other part is
then being willing to help them problem-solve if those "solutions"
aren't exactly what they hoped. To use a montessori truism: "kids
learn to make decisions by making decisions" and that includes less
than sucessful decisions, so they can experience the whole process
*with our support* backing them up, and helping them figure out the
"what now"? parts.
**So, again I remind him to please brush his teeth. Sometimes, this
happens several times.**
Try starting the conversation in a different place - hey, guy, your
breath is pretty stinky in the morning, but toothbrushing seems to be
a hassle for you... can we find a better solution? If he's not used
to this kind of problem solving (if mom jumps to solutions, why
should he be?) he might need some prompting. Can you set up the
toothbrushing somewhere different? Can y'all look into mouth rinses
for first thing in the morning? Gum? A tongue scraper? Maybe y'all
could look into some of the causes of bad-breath together and find
yet more possibilities - like a change of night-time snacks, or more
humidity in the bedroom or a nasal rinse? There are dozens of
possible solutions to morning breath and creating a healthier mouth
environment.
** I suppose I could give up on working with him**
Sometimes a break *is* a valuble solution to explore. Its good to
"red flag" situations where you seem to come up with only two
options, though. That's often a good sign that you've gotten stuck in
your thinking - and a good opportunity to go to your kids and say
"hey, I can't figure this one out, lets put our heads together". And
if that doesn't work, well, that's one of the things these boards are
great for - seeing a bunch of different perspectives and possibilities.
============ Question ============
Kelly
My 7 year old HATES brushing her teeth. Well she hates to have her
hair combed too. The hair thing.....well who cares, it can be one big
messy knot and it's of no consequence. The teeth.....well they are
gonna rot out of her mouth. She does not want me to do it, and she
refuses to do it herself. So I have let it go for a period of time
thinking it would start to bother her......NOPE, she has fur growing
on those babies and she could care less. I'm just not sure how to
approach this one.
============ Replies ============
Jodi
Actually, this is not true. Tooth rot has more to do with a genetic
roll of the dice than care. I am 36 yrs old and have on paper taken
horrible care of my teeth. As a child I did not brush for MONTHS.
Even now, I do not brush twice a day (mostly because I have mouth
ulcers and at times it's too painful to brush.) I have NO cavities.
No rot, no periodontal disease. Both my brothers take much better
care of their teeth but they have tons of fillings. I really think
it's just a matter of chance. So as uptight as I am about everything
else still <bg> on tooth brushing I sort of leave it alone. I remind
every now and again "Hey, have you brushed your teeth lately?" But I
don't ever bug them about it.
You can give other things a try...toothbrushes that make music, light
up, bubblegum toothpaste. Offer different options perhaps. Also gauze
on a finger tip works too. Not as good as a brushing but better than
nothing.
Aubrey
Absolutely. My grandmother used to say, "You either got good spit or
bad spit." I brush my teeth after every meal. I even carry a
toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse and have been know to give
myself a quick brush in the car. Last year I had to have 4 root
canals and 3 cavities fixed! My husband usually brushes once a day,
sometimes twice and very seldom has any problems. I can only remember
him having one cavity in the last 10 years. My dd was tremendously
influenced by our last trip to the dentist. He is very good with
children and took the time to show her with a plastic model how to
brush most effectively. He talked to her on her level and explained
all about dental care. I have also been able to find cute little
books about dental care that my kids enjoyed. This helped a great
deal. Sometimes if we are going out I will ask them if they
remembered to brush and try to remind them before bed but other than
that I don't worry too much about it. My own experiences have shown
me that it doesn't make a whole lot of difference in how many dental
problems a person has.
Kelly
I do agree with you by the way. I have one cavity and have not taken
the best care of my teeth. My father is the same way, and I'm pretty
sure genetically I got his teeth. Both of my girls are adopted. My
9 year old has the worst teeth ever. I lost count a long time ago on
the number of cavities she has. We go to the dentist every six
months and she has anywhere from 2-4 cavities every time, and she
DOES brush her teeth. Now my 7 year old is the one that does not
brush her teeth. She only has 1 cavity so far, but really I have no
history on how her birth parents teeth were.
Kendrah
I've made teeth brushing a priority. I've never forced it, EVER.
I've only made it fun and since I model good oral hygiene habits
myself, they seem to be fine with it. I've had at least 4 friends who
children (all of whom were under the age of three) had to be put
under to have cavities filled. One girl's teeth were literally
crumbling out of her mouth. None of these parents practiced
consistent toothbrushing. If my child starts to resist teethbrushing?
Well, I guess I'll have to lighten up a bit and hope for the best.
I'd buy different kinds of toothbrushes (electric do a better job in
a shorter time), and toothpastes. I'd hope they'd go to the dentist
so they'd get cleaned good at least twice a year! I'd continue to
model good oral hygiene habits.
Deb
For us, DS would sometimes comment on my (or DH's) "morning breath"
by saying our breath was "hot" and we'd go brush. So, when his breath
gets "hot", I'll mention it and ask if he wants help or wants to do
it himself (he's 9). I think that's another big area of the situation
too - just because a child is 6 or 7 or 8 or whatever doesn't mean
they "have to" brush on their own by themselves in the bathroom.
Sometimes we've had three tiered brushing action with DS, then me
looking over him into the mirror and DH looking over my head (which
usually occasions lots of silliness BTW). Often, DS will request I do
the brushing for him, so I do. Sometimes we'll take the toothbrush, a
small cup of water to rinse and another cup to spit into (and a small
washcloth) into the other room and brushing occurs while watching TV.
Sometimes brushing doesn't occur before bed and after breakfast but
at other times of the day when there's a convenient 'pause' in the
activity level of the day and that's cool too.
Melissa
One thing I did do was buy the ACT floride treatment, which they do
like to use, and I feel like at least they are strengthening their
teeth even if they don't brush as well. Eating apples and cheese is
supposed to be good, as well as a glass of water after meals. We also
play dentist sometimes, where we take turns brushing teeth. I'll just
say that it's been a while and ask if they want to play dentist.
We've also experimented a lot with brushes and pastes. For while,
Breanna would let us use a washcloth to clean her teeth, it works as
well without all the overwhelming sensory issues of the hundred
bristles and toothpaste flavor.
Shannon
There are things you can do besides actually brushing teeth: use Dr.
Ray's Spiffies wipes (http://www.drraysproducts.com/). These are
individually foil-wrapped wet wipes for teeth that have xylitol in
them. My younger ones chew them like gum and then spit them out; she
could wrap one around her finger or chew it. The great thing about
these is you can carry them around with you - she can clean her teet
whenever she gets the urge.
She can also rinse her mouth with a baking soda or xylitol wash,
instead of brushing. Some foods, such as cheese, are good for
teeth. She can chew xylitol gum or eat xylitol mints
(www.xylitolnow.com, http://homesteadmarket.com/about.html, or
www.xlear.com have good products).
You asked how we handle it: half of our family (my sons and I) have
the strep mutans bacteria that causes early childhood caries (ECC).
Early Childhood Caries (ECC) is the most infectious disease among
children younger than five and is usually transmitted by a parent or
caregiver (by biting a piece of food and giving it to the child). My
sons both had partial bridges by the time they were two. By the time
my youngest was two, he had 6 teeth pulled and had two lower molar
crowns. I could visibly see the teeth dissolving over a two week
period and could see a HOLE through one of his molars. I brush,
floss, and still was going in for a cavity repair every month or two,
and have 4 root canals and a couple additional crowns.
One of the changes we made was to brush before instead of after
eating. The bacteria must come in contact with sugar or
carbohydrates to acidify; even brushing immediately after eating
allows the bacteria to acidify. By brushing before eating one
removes the bacterial plaque, which takes twenty-four hours to
recolonize. We also eat foods to remineralize our teeth and take cod
liver oil, and use xylitol toothpaste and products.
My youngest has not had a single cavity in two years. One eye tooth
that had begun calcifying when we made our changes - has not
progressed AT ALL into any decay (I have an explorer and check for
sticky spots).
We do not have any resistance to tooth brushing, is just part of our
routine like washing hands after using the bathroom. We keep
toothbrushes in the kitchen, the bathroom, and the car, for
convenience (there is no adult looming over them - sometimes we feel
our teeth are fuzzy and are too busy to go to the bathroom to brush
them - kitchen is then more handy). My boys would much rather brush
their teeth than have emergency extractions for teeth that have
broken off at the gumline (this happened to my youngest and was
probably the most agonizing parenting moment I have ever gone
through; with the other son his top four teeth broke in half after a
fall onto carpet). For my boys, they lay on the bed at night and
"mommy robot" brings the robot brush - or they are frozen and the
tooth brush unfreezes them - whatever game they invent, I will do.
As you can see there are numerous alternatives to actually brushing,
I hope one of these works for you and your daughter.
Ren
My youngest has some sensory issues and doesn't like brushing very
often. He also has teeth that aren't especially healthy. We found
this mouthwash that has xylitol and no alcohol, so he loves it. We
also keep baking soda around.....
Krisula
I have one kid who neglected his teeth a lot and rarely gets a
cavity. I have another who is a good brusher and has had lots and
lots of dental issues starting when she was two. It does seem to be
a bit of a roll of the dice. Some things that helped here: I offer
a small piece of cheddar cheese at bed time to help remedy the PH of
her mouth. My kids like it and it is a really good way to keep the
acid down. Also, there are so many cool toothbrushes and flavors of
toothpaste and stuff, now and then we all go get new ones. It's
always fun. In fact we were at Target today and we each got a new
fancy spinning toothbrush and I bought a different flavor paste for
each kid. Plus we got those cool little plastic flossers. I spent
more than I normally would but they all had a blast and they were
excited to try it out when we got home.
Someone, and I can't remember who, once suggested:
Let the child brush your teeth. Then ask if you can brush his. Be
okay if he says no.
(I'd add you can give him some suggestions as to how, like "Hey, can
you get the back ones too?" but don't demand he do it a particular
way. -- It's likely you'll have to brush again so don't look for
perfection! -- The goal is to keep it fun.)
thought I'd share it.
This is *not* about ways to get kids to brush teeth. It isn't even
solutions to the problem of getting kids to brush teeth. What it is,
is how parents who practice mindful parenting and respecting their
kids go about finding ways to help their kids have clean teeth.
What's important is not the solutions (though there are several that
might work for people) but the process of being a child's partner.
If anyone has ideas to add, post them to the list :-)
Joyce
============ Question ============
Jamie
Does anyone have ideas to encourage my 4 1/2 yo to brush his teeth?
He has always resisted it and, because of this and acid reflux, has
had to have major dental work done. Just so you know, he HATES it
and it is a true battle of wills, with me holding him tightly and
brushing while he screams. (This was obviously before we started
unschooling and I just don't know what to do.)
============ Replies ============
Jodi Bezzola
Isn't it funny when a really big deal turns out to be about something
so simple?!? I laughed when I read this, because a few weeks ago
Jade (one of my 3 1/2 year old twin girls) told me she didn't ever
want to brush because the toothpaste is 'howibwe'...it was kids minty
something or other. After she told me that we went out and found
Tom's apricot flavour (tastes like jam) and she's been brushing non-
stop ever since. Oh, and they also got to pick out a fancy motorized
Dora toothbrush which delights them to no end :).
Nicole Willoughby
I encourage my girls to brush and buy them fun toothbrushes, child
friendly floss, moutwash etc. At their recent dental visits dd8 has 5
cavities shell be going back to have filled and dd 5 has 3.
Now my autistic son who almost never allows us to brush his teeth
went for his check-up last week and once again has 0 cavities.
Jeanette Crichton
I have always looked for cartoon characters in my kids mouth while I
brush their teeth. We have looked for Spiderman, Batman, Star Wars
characters, Backyardigans, etc. Sometimes it gets a little difficult
because the kids giggle so much : ) In the beginning I don't even
called it brushing teeth. I make up some sort of silly name for it,
and I very dramatically "play" with their teeth and the left over
"food" in their mouth. Tooth brushing is just another playful moment
in our house.
Schuyler
It is interesting, I've just been doing a quick and cursory
exploration of the world of oral bacteria via google and found this:
http://www.db.od.mah.se/car/data/kohlermut.html which shows that the
earlier you get mutans streptococci the more prone to caries/cavities
you are, with absolutely no discussion of how much you brush or floss
your teeth. Here's an abstract about the natural history of
Streptoccus sanguinis (a benign oral bacteria) http://iai.asm.org/cgi/
content/abstract/68/7/4018 I think I like it most because it refers
to oral bacteria as "indigenous biota of the human oral cavity". Oh,
how I love science!! There is this talk abstract: http://
iadr.confex.com/iadr/2002SanDiego/techprogram/abstract_18332.htm
which found no difference in colonization of mutans streptococci in
caries free Swedish teenagers and caries prevelant Swedish teenagers.
Similar finding here: http://jdr.iadrjournals.org/cgi/content/
abstract/77/10/1851 with the added comment that it isn't diet that
is doing it. Oh, I could do this for a long time.
It's really cool. It isn't scary, or something to be used to scare a
child with, they are cavities, holes in your teeth caused by acids.
The bacteria, the indigenous biota, are just living there, they are
indigenous. Well, they are indigenous from about 30 months old, on
average. Yes, toothbrushing makes a difference http://
content.karger.com/ProdukteDB/produkte.asp?
Aktion=ShowAbstract&ArtikelNr=\ 16503&Ausgabe=225458&ProduktNr=224219
(an old paper, 1999, but cool for the British social class stuff --
I'm assuming that's what the manual versus non-manual mention is
about). A big difference. But it isn't going to keep you clear of
caries if you are prone to getting them.
Hard cheese is supposed to be quite good for regulating the
population of mutans streptococci, quick search shows that
lactobacilli tends to keep populations of mutans streptococci in
check. Xylitol has been shown to reduce plaque and when mother's chew
it for the first couple of years of their child's life the
colonization of the child's teeth by mutans streptococci is delayed
and thus caries are less likely to occur.
Carron Armstrong
It turned out that he just didn't like the toothpaste. He had
switched from a fruit flavored kid toothpaste to a minty adult
paste. He discovered that he hates mint, but didn't realize that he
could just switch back to his old toothpaste. Now he uses that Crest
citrus flavor, which has some mint in it, but he doesn't seem to mind
that.
Jodi Bezzola
[She] told me she didn't ever want to brush because the toothpaste is
'howibwe'...it was kids minty something or other. After she told me
that we went out and found Tom's apricot flavour (tastes like jam)
and she's been brushing non-stop ever since. Oh, and they also got
to pick out a fancy motorized Dora toothbrush which delights them to
no end :).
Alex P
ow about using xylitol mints and gum instead of brushing?? check
xylitol.org
Zoa Conner
Or peelu gum...
Karen Swanay
if your child has weak enamel over-brushing can CAUSE cavitites as
well. I have strong enamel and take horrid care of my teeth. I just
turned 37 and have no cavities. Both my parents have full dentures
and both brothers have mouthes full of fillings. But I can't for the
life of me see telling a child that the "bugs" will bore through the
teeth until the child screams in pain will bring you closer or make
the child think you are nice. FWIW I'd leave the kid alone. Tell
the kid about brushing, why we do it and then leave it be. My kids
are not forced to brush their teeth. But they have several flavors
of toothpaste, different brushes, and gauze pads to use instead of
brushes if they wish. It's their mouth...I leave them alone about it.
Ulrike Haupt
To eat an apple or carrot or piece of fullcorn bread cleanses the
teeth good enough.
Jodi Bezzola
I have floosed and brushed every day for my entire 41 year old life,
and yet every trip to the dentist shows up yet another cavity or some
other form of decay. It's just the way I'm built. My husband on the
other hand never flosses, never brushes at night and has never had a
cavity.
Lisa B
I have a child in the exact situation.... I made sure to provide lots
of implements ... interesting power brushes, milder toothpaste (or
even no toothpaste!) and just modeled good dental hygiene. Making
it a battle isn't going to accomplish much other than proving to him
that you don't trust him and that he can't trust you. Forcing a
child who has what sounds like sensory issues and has a history of
dental issues is really setting him up for difficulty. My son has
gotten better about brushing now that he's noticed that sometimes
people have bad breath... he's 6 now and will say "wow mom you need
to brush" I always say "yes I had garlic for dinner " hoping that
he will connect that some foods make your breath stinkier and that
some things like poppy seeds, strawberries, blueberries etc make your
teeth look icky if you don't brush. Ultimately I leave it up to
him ....I can fix his teeth but his spirit might be trickier!
Ren
The point was that it often doesn't help to overstate consequences to
children, because it can erode trust if the outcome isn't what Mom
said it would be. I think the use of color tablets or other items
might be great for some people! The question is whether you should
tell children they'll get cavities and pain if they don't brush.
Because some will rarely brush and never get a cavity, others will
brush faithfully and get lots! We don't want to mislead children in
order to get them to do something. That's all.
Jodi
I just hand them their toothbrushes with toothpaste on them in the
tub and they brush. I suggest teeth brushing every morning/every
evening and sometimes they go for it and sometimes they don't.
Caren
I am 42. I can eat as much or as little as I please, of whatever I
please. I can brush my teeth or not. I can even DRIVE to the fast-
food place when I want, and eat what I want there. I'm the one with
the debit card, so I can buy what I choose at the grocery store. Why
aren't I choosing *only* sweets and Dorito's, and filling my cart
with stuff that's barely food? Because I prefer how I feel when I eat
food as close to the source as possible, mindfully. *I* feel *better*
when I eat that way. Why do I brush my teeth? Because my mouth feels
better when I do, and actually, I've found my mood is better, too. I
found that out by *not* brushing my teeth. I had to give *myself*
total freedom when we started this journey, too. Now - *everything*
is a choice. Everything. I don't do things because my mom told me it
would be good for me. I do things because I WANT to, because of how
my choices make me feel.
Joyce
When I was a kid I remember being sent to brush my teeth alone and it
took *hours*. Okay, not really ;-) It felt like hours!
So what I did with my daughter was to do it with her. We talked and
joked. I made sure she had a brush and toothpaste she liked. I'm sure
I must have mentioned preventing cavities in there at some point.
Eventually it became automatic. Sometimes she would say she didn't
feel like brushing. I'd say don't. And she'd say what if I get a
cavity and we'd talk about the difference between habitually not
brushing and skipping once. I can't remember her choosing not to
brush but it would have been okay if she had.
swissarmywife
For brushing teeth we've made it as easy as possible. We used to
brush our teeth together, now the boys prefer to brush together.
Some kids like a small mirror to watch themselves. Toothbrushes and
toothpaste can be moved. Another bathroom? Kitchen sink? We also
let the kids pick out their brushes. Right now they really like
their electric power ranger brushes! We also buy natural toothpaste
(Tom's of Maine kids strawberry) which has a mild flavor they don't
seem to mind. We also bought flossers, rather than using regular
dental floss. My older son has had experience with cavities, so he
doesn't seem to mind brushing and flossing so much anymore. for my
younger one (3) as long as I don't push he will let me help him out
once a week or so. the other times he does it himself. I know its
not perfect, but we have sort of made a game with the "EEEE!
AAAAAHHHH! OOOOHHHH!" mouth shapes. :-)
mimiphilomena
We use non foaming, non flouride toothpaste (no spitting required),
so brushing and flossing teeth happens in bed, right before story. I
read a story and maybe rub her back a bit, and she is out.
polykowholsteins
http://www.angelfire.com/az/sthurston/xylitol_natural_sweetener.html
"...Xylitol is a dentist's dream. It reverses all these destructive
effects of sugar on oral health. Xylitol is non-fermentable and
therefore cannot be converted to acids by oral bacteria, thus it
helps to restore a proper alkaline/acid balance in the mouth. This
alkaline environment is inhospitable to all the destructive bacteria,
especially the worst variety, Streptococcus mutans. It also inhibits
plaque formation...."
Susan
Ah, yes! My son frequently forgets where he was headed / what he was
going to do and it happens with teeth brushing, too. There is much
less stress if we go to do it together. I give him a piggyback ride
to the bathroom, sometimes he brushes his teeth and sometimes he
wants me to do it. I don't mind helping him brush at all, I think it
helps him figure out the sensations and movements of what a good
teeth brushing feels like. We talk about each part of his mouth and
he asks questions, etc. Since he's fiercely independent in many ways,
it's a treat for me to be able to do something *for* him. We pause to
chit-chat and giggle. Sometimes we'll brush our teeth together or
he'll want to brush mine for me.
If told him to go do it he'd make it halfway down the hallway and
start playing. I'd get frustrated, remind him again, direct him
toward the bathroom, spot him in the living room a few moments later
and discover he still hadn't brushed his teeth. I'd send him down the
hallway again with my patience rapidly decreasing, and so on until
eventually I was close to yelling and all but dragging him into the
bathroom or on the verge of making threats like "no bedtime story" etc.
There is a principal behind the act of teeth brushing - taking care
of ourselves so we stay healthy. Both ways are trying to meet this
goal. One way tries to figure out how to make it happen in the most
joyful, non-coercive way. There are no commands, rules or punishments
involved. It does, however, require me to be *present* and actively
engaged with him to accomplish the brushing of teeth.
The other way is the opposite. It starts with me thinking I can issue
a command and have it obeyed and that should be the extent of my
involvement. Every time he needs redirecting my frustration level
grows because I'm not suppose to have to intervene - I said "do it"
and that should have been it. I choose to turn it into a battle of
wills and to take his inability to complete the task on my timetable
as a sign of disrespect.
Which way is respectful towards the child and is more pleasant for
both of us? Which way is ultimately more hands-on? Which way honors
the relationship?
Meredith
**Of course, I kindly remind him to brush his teeth**
One alternative would be to talk about his breath without going
straight to the solution - I forget that myself and tend to go
straight to solutions. After all, my solutions are fabulous! Why
wouldn't anyone just want me to tell them what to.... oh, oops.
Part of supporting autonomy is giving our kids the space to think of
some of those fabulous solutions on their own - the other part is
then being willing to help them problem-solve if those "solutions"
aren't exactly what they hoped. To use a montessori truism: "kids
learn to make decisions by making decisions" and that includes less
than sucessful decisions, so they can experience the whole process
*with our support* backing them up, and helping them figure out the
"what now"? parts.
**So, again I remind him to please brush his teeth. Sometimes, this
happens several times.**
Try starting the conversation in a different place - hey, guy, your
breath is pretty stinky in the morning, but toothbrushing seems to be
a hassle for you... can we find a better solution? If he's not used
to this kind of problem solving (if mom jumps to solutions, why
should he be?) he might need some prompting. Can you set up the
toothbrushing somewhere different? Can y'all look into mouth rinses
for first thing in the morning? Gum? A tongue scraper? Maybe y'all
could look into some of the causes of bad-breath together and find
yet more possibilities - like a change of night-time snacks, or more
humidity in the bedroom or a nasal rinse? There are dozens of
possible solutions to morning breath and creating a healthier mouth
environment.
** I suppose I could give up on working with him**
Sometimes a break *is* a valuble solution to explore. Its good to
"red flag" situations where you seem to come up with only two
options, though. That's often a good sign that you've gotten stuck in
your thinking - and a good opportunity to go to your kids and say
"hey, I can't figure this one out, lets put our heads together". And
if that doesn't work, well, that's one of the things these boards are
great for - seeing a bunch of different perspectives and possibilities.
============ Question ============
Kelly
My 7 year old HATES brushing her teeth. Well she hates to have her
hair combed too. The hair thing.....well who cares, it can be one big
messy knot and it's of no consequence. The teeth.....well they are
gonna rot out of her mouth. She does not want me to do it, and she
refuses to do it herself. So I have let it go for a period of time
thinking it would start to bother her......NOPE, she has fur growing
on those babies and she could care less. I'm just not sure how to
approach this one.
============ Replies ============
Jodi
Actually, this is not true. Tooth rot has more to do with a genetic
roll of the dice than care. I am 36 yrs old and have on paper taken
horrible care of my teeth. As a child I did not brush for MONTHS.
Even now, I do not brush twice a day (mostly because I have mouth
ulcers and at times it's too painful to brush.) I have NO cavities.
No rot, no periodontal disease. Both my brothers take much better
care of their teeth but they have tons of fillings. I really think
it's just a matter of chance. So as uptight as I am about everything
else still <bg> on tooth brushing I sort of leave it alone. I remind
every now and again "Hey, have you brushed your teeth lately?" But I
don't ever bug them about it.
You can give other things a try...toothbrushes that make music, light
up, bubblegum toothpaste. Offer different options perhaps. Also gauze
on a finger tip works too. Not as good as a brushing but better than
nothing.
Aubrey
Absolutely. My grandmother used to say, "You either got good spit or
bad spit." I brush my teeth after every meal. I even carry a
toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse and have been know to give
myself a quick brush in the car. Last year I had to have 4 root
canals and 3 cavities fixed! My husband usually brushes once a day,
sometimes twice and very seldom has any problems. I can only remember
him having one cavity in the last 10 years. My dd was tremendously
influenced by our last trip to the dentist. He is very good with
children and took the time to show her with a plastic model how to
brush most effectively. He talked to her on her level and explained
all about dental care. I have also been able to find cute little
books about dental care that my kids enjoyed. This helped a great
deal. Sometimes if we are going out I will ask them if they
remembered to brush and try to remind them before bed but other than
that I don't worry too much about it. My own experiences have shown
me that it doesn't make a whole lot of difference in how many dental
problems a person has.
Kelly
I do agree with you by the way. I have one cavity and have not taken
the best care of my teeth. My father is the same way, and I'm pretty
sure genetically I got his teeth. Both of my girls are adopted. My
9 year old has the worst teeth ever. I lost count a long time ago on
the number of cavities she has. We go to the dentist every six
months and she has anywhere from 2-4 cavities every time, and she
DOES brush her teeth. Now my 7 year old is the one that does not
brush her teeth. She only has 1 cavity so far, but really I have no
history on how her birth parents teeth were.
Kendrah
I've made teeth brushing a priority. I've never forced it, EVER.
I've only made it fun and since I model good oral hygiene habits
myself, they seem to be fine with it. I've had at least 4 friends who
children (all of whom were under the age of three) had to be put
under to have cavities filled. One girl's teeth were literally
crumbling out of her mouth. None of these parents practiced
consistent toothbrushing. If my child starts to resist teethbrushing?
Well, I guess I'll have to lighten up a bit and hope for the best.
I'd buy different kinds of toothbrushes (electric do a better job in
a shorter time), and toothpastes. I'd hope they'd go to the dentist
so they'd get cleaned good at least twice a year! I'd continue to
model good oral hygiene habits.
Deb
For us, DS would sometimes comment on my (or DH's) "morning breath"
by saying our breath was "hot" and we'd go brush. So, when his breath
gets "hot", I'll mention it and ask if he wants help or wants to do
it himself (he's 9). I think that's another big area of the situation
too - just because a child is 6 or 7 or 8 or whatever doesn't mean
they "have to" brush on their own by themselves in the bathroom.
Sometimes we've had three tiered brushing action with DS, then me
looking over him into the mirror and DH looking over my head (which
usually occasions lots of silliness BTW). Often, DS will request I do
the brushing for him, so I do. Sometimes we'll take the toothbrush, a
small cup of water to rinse and another cup to spit into (and a small
washcloth) into the other room and brushing occurs while watching TV.
Sometimes brushing doesn't occur before bed and after breakfast but
at other times of the day when there's a convenient 'pause' in the
activity level of the day and that's cool too.
Melissa
One thing I did do was buy the ACT floride treatment, which they do
like to use, and I feel like at least they are strengthening their
teeth even if they don't brush as well. Eating apples and cheese is
supposed to be good, as well as a glass of water after meals. We also
play dentist sometimes, where we take turns brushing teeth. I'll just
say that it's been a while and ask if they want to play dentist.
We've also experimented a lot with brushes and pastes. For while,
Breanna would let us use a washcloth to clean her teeth, it works as
well without all the overwhelming sensory issues of the hundred
bristles and toothpaste flavor.
Shannon
There are things you can do besides actually brushing teeth: use Dr.
Ray's Spiffies wipes (http://www.drraysproducts.com/). These are
individually foil-wrapped wet wipes for teeth that have xylitol in
them. My younger ones chew them like gum and then spit them out; she
could wrap one around her finger or chew it. The great thing about
these is you can carry them around with you - she can clean her teet
whenever she gets the urge.
She can also rinse her mouth with a baking soda or xylitol wash,
instead of brushing. Some foods, such as cheese, are good for
teeth. She can chew xylitol gum or eat xylitol mints
(www.xylitolnow.com, http://homesteadmarket.com/about.html, or
www.xlear.com have good products).
You asked how we handle it: half of our family (my sons and I) have
the strep mutans bacteria that causes early childhood caries (ECC).
Early Childhood Caries (ECC) is the most infectious disease among
children younger than five and is usually transmitted by a parent or
caregiver (by biting a piece of food and giving it to the child). My
sons both had partial bridges by the time they were two. By the time
my youngest was two, he had 6 teeth pulled and had two lower molar
crowns. I could visibly see the teeth dissolving over a two week
period and could see a HOLE through one of his molars. I brush,
floss, and still was going in for a cavity repair every month or two,
and have 4 root canals and a couple additional crowns.
One of the changes we made was to brush before instead of after
eating. The bacteria must come in contact with sugar or
carbohydrates to acidify; even brushing immediately after eating
allows the bacteria to acidify. By brushing before eating one
removes the bacterial plaque, which takes twenty-four hours to
recolonize. We also eat foods to remineralize our teeth and take cod
liver oil, and use xylitol toothpaste and products.
My youngest has not had a single cavity in two years. One eye tooth
that had begun calcifying when we made our changes - has not
progressed AT ALL into any decay (I have an explorer and check for
sticky spots).
We do not have any resistance to tooth brushing, is just part of our
routine like washing hands after using the bathroom. We keep
toothbrushes in the kitchen, the bathroom, and the car, for
convenience (there is no adult looming over them - sometimes we feel
our teeth are fuzzy and are too busy to go to the bathroom to brush
them - kitchen is then more handy). My boys would much rather brush
their teeth than have emergency extractions for teeth that have
broken off at the gumline (this happened to my youngest and was
probably the most agonizing parenting moment I have ever gone
through; with the other son his top four teeth broke in half after a
fall onto carpet). For my boys, they lay on the bed at night and
"mommy robot" brings the robot brush - or they are frozen and the
tooth brush unfreezes them - whatever game they invent, I will do.
As you can see there are numerous alternatives to actually brushing,
I hope one of these works for you and your daughter.
Ren
My youngest has some sensory issues and doesn't like brushing very
often. He also has teeth that aren't especially healthy. We found
this mouthwash that has xylitol and no alcohol, so he loves it. We
also keep baking soda around.....
Krisula
I have one kid who neglected his teeth a lot and rarely gets a
cavity. I have another who is a good brusher and has had lots and
lots of dental issues starting when she was two. It does seem to be
a bit of a roll of the dice. Some things that helped here: I offer
a small piece of cheddar cheese at bed time to help remedy the PH of
her mouth. My kids like it and it is a really good way to keep the
acid down. Also, there are so many cool toothbrushes and flavors of
toothpaste and stuff, now and then we all go get new ones. It's
always fun. In fact we were at Target today and we each got a new
fancy spinning toothbrush and I bought a different flavor paste for
each kid. Plus we got those cool little plastic flossers. I spent
more than I normally would but they all had a blast and they were
excited to try it out when we got home.
Someone, and I can't remember who, once suggested:
Let the child brush your teeth. Then ask if you can brush his. Be
okay if he says no.
(I'd add you can give him some suggestions as to how, like "Hey, can
you get the back ones too?" but don't demand he do it a particular
way. -- It's likely you'll have to brush again so don't look for
perfection! -- The goal is to keep it fun.)
Jodi Bezzola
Thanks Joyce for the toothbrushing tips list, awesome compilation! And for the record, I didn't say this:
Jodi
Actually, this is not true. Tooth rot has more to do with a genetic
roll of the dice than care. I am 36 yrs old and have on paper taken
horrible care of my teeth. As a child I did not brush for MONTHS.
Even now, I do not brush twice a day (mostly because I have mouth
ulcers and at times it's too painful to brush.) I have NO cavities.
No rot, no periodontal disease. Both my brothers take much better
care of their teeth but they have tons of fillings. I really think
it's just a matter of chance. So as uptight as I am about everything
else still <bg> on tooth brushing I sort of leave it alone. I remind
every now and again "Hey, have you brushed your teeth lately?" But I
don't ever bug them about it.
You can give other things a try...toothbrushes that make music, light
up, bubblegum toothpaste. Offer different options perhaps. Also gauze
on a finger tip works too. Not as good as a brushing but better than
nothing.
Not sure who said this, but it wasn't me...although I wouldn't mind being 36 instead of 41! :)
Jodi
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Jodi
Actually, this is not true. Tooth rot has more to do with a genetic
roll of the dice than care. I am 36 yrs old and have on paper taken
horrible care of my teeth. As a child I did not brush for MONTHS.
Even now, I do not brush twice a day (mostly because I have mouth
ulcers and at times it's too painful to brush.) I have NO cavities.
No rot, no periodontal disease. Both my brothers take much better
care of their teeth but they have tons of fillings. I really think
it's just a matter of chance. So as uptight as I am about everything
else still <bg> on tooth brushing I sort of leave it alone. I remind
every now and again "Hey, have you brushed your teeth lately?" But I
don't ever bug them about it.
You can give other things a try...toothbrushes that make music, light
up, bubblegum toothpaste. Offer different options perhaps. Also gauze
on a finger tip works too. Not as good as a brushing but better than
nothing.
Not sure who said this, but it wasn't me...although I wouldn't mind being 36 instead of 41! :)
Jodi
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Joyce Fetteroll
On Jul 2, 2008, at 2:08 PM, Jodi Bezzola wrote:
Joyce
> And for the record, I didn't say this:Thanks! It was Karen Swanay.
>
> Jodi
> Actually, this is not true. Tooth rot has more to do with a genetic
> roll of the dice than care.
Joyce
Cornelia
Hello,
We're pretty new to unschooling, and to this list (as far as posting goes) and have found it very informative and helpful. I wanted to ask for people's thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushing teeth.
Many thanks in advance,
Cornelia
We're pretty new to unschooling, and to this list (as far as posting goes) and have found it very informative and helpful. I wanted to ask for people's thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushing teeth.
Many thanks in advance,
Cornelia
Joyce Fetteroll
On Dec 11, 2010, at 3:54 PM, Cornelia wrote:
slow for lists, so you can read through this while you wait:
http://joyfullyrejoycing.com/unschooling%20in%20action/brushingteeth.html
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
> I wanted to ask for people's thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushingI'm sure people will be along with stories, but weekends tend to be
> teeth.
slow for lists, so you can read through this while you wait:
http://joyfullyrejoycing.com/unschooling%20in%20action/brushingteeth.html
Joyce
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
plaidpanties666
"Cornelia" <corneliablik@...> wrote:
Knowing ages and other pertinent information could be helpful. In general, though, it can help you to think about your goals and your fears and work toward gaining a sense of perspective. There are options for oral hygiene besides brushing (rinses, wipes, specific foods) and a good more going on in the mouth than food=cavities. Genetics play a role. Overall health plays a roll. Stress plays a roll.
If your kids are little, you can look for ways to make oral hygiene fun and appealing, and that works with some kids. Other kids do better by parents not making an issue out if it, just making sure supplies are available. But some families will also do better for mom and dad to drop the matter entirely for a few years rather than creating a power struggle around a behavior of questionable value. It all depends.
---Meredith
> I wanted to ask for people's thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushing teeth.****************
Knowing ages and other pertinent information could be helpful. In general, though, it can help you to think about your goals and your fears and work toward gaining a sense of perspective. There are options for oral hygiene besides brushing (rinses, wipes, specific foods) and a good more going on in the mouth than food=cavities. Genetics play a role. Overall health plays a roll. Stress plays a roll.
If your kids are little, you can look for ways to make oral hygiene fun and appealing, and that works with some kids. Other kids do better by parents not making an issue out if it, just making sure supplies are available. But some families will also do better for mom and dad to drop the matter entirely for a few years rather than creating a power struggle around a behavior of questionable value. It all depends.
---Meredith
Three Mommies
Hey there :)
The grown-ups in our house brush morning and night. We often announce that
we are doing it and invite our guys to join us. Ryan (age 7) will often
decline, but sometimes will ask one of us to bring him a "ready toothbrush"
to him where he is and then will either ask one of us to brush his teeth or
do it himself. Ethan was never into teooth-brushing until one day when he
was about 9. He asked why we thought brushing was important. After hearing
our reasons, he just thanked us and then didn't brush. A few weeks later he
announced that when we brushed we should come to him and say "MAN." It was
very important that we say only that and nothing more. He said MAN mean
"Morning And Night" and that was his personal reminder that he wanted to
brush. After that, he has mostly brushed twice a day when one of us does.
Some days he doesn't feel like doing it, but then some days I skip it too ;)
And that's the story of tooth brushing in our house *grin*
Peace,
Jean Elizabeth
http://3mommies.blogspot.com
The grown-ups in our house brush morning and night. We often announce that
we are doing it and invite our guys to join us. Ryan (age 7) will often
decline, but sometimes will ask one of us to bring him a "ready toothbrush"
to him where he is and then will either ask one of us to brush his teeth or
do it himself. Ethan was never into teooth-brushing until one day when he
was about 9. He asked why we thought brushing was important. After hearing
our reasons, he just thanked us and then didn't brush. A few weeks later he
announced that when we brushed we should come to him and say "MAN." It was
very important that we say only that and nothing more. He said MAN mean
"Morning And Night" and that was his personal reminder that he wanted to
brush. After that, he has mostly brushed twice a day when one of us does.
Some days he doesn't feel like doing it, but then some days I skip it too ;)
And that's the story of tooth brushing in our house *grin*
Peace,
Jean Elizabeth
http://3mommies.blogspot.com
On Sat, Dec 11, 2010 at 3:54 PM, Cornelia <corneliablik@...> wrote:
>
>
> Hello,
> We're pretty new to unschooling, and to this list (as far as posting goes)
> and have found it very informative and helpful. I wanted to ask for people's
> thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushing teeth.
> Many thanks in advance,
> Cornelia
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tina Tarbutton
About twice a week I'll ask Draven (10 y/o) to take a shower within the next
24 hours, typically he brushes his teeth whenever he takes a shower. If
we're going someplace special within the next day I'll let him know the
night before and suggest a shower if it's been a few days, and at those
times I'll remind him to brush his teeth before we leave. Overall he drinks
a lot of water with meals, and he likes to chew gum (mostly sugarfree) so I
figure that takes care of most of it. He doesn't like being reminded daily,
so we don't do that.
He's pretty susceptible to having huge teeth problems when he's older
because his father's entire family has problems, but with them it really
didn't matter if they were religious 3x a day brushers or rarely brushed, so
I don't make a huge deal out of it. He knows about his fathers dental
problems, he knows not brushing could make them happen younger.
I know when I hit puberty I suddenly had a bad taste in my mouth every
morning and that's when I started brushing on a regular basis. I figure most
likely the same thing will happen to him.
Tina
24 hours, typically he brushes his teeth whenever he takes a shower. If
we're going someplace special within the next day I'll let him know the
night before and suggest a shower if it's been a few days, and at those
times I'll remind him to brush his teeth before we leave. Overall he drinks
a lot of water with meals, and he likes to chew gum (mostly sugarfree) so I
figure that takes care of most of it. He doesn't like being reminded daily,
so we don't do that.
He's pretty susceptible to having huge teeth problems when he's older
because his father's entire family has problems, but with them it really
didn't matter if they were religious 3x a day brushers or rarely brushed, so
I don't make a huge deal out of it. He knows about his fathers dental
problems, he knows not brushing could make them happen younger.
I know when I hit puberty I suddenly had a bad taste in my mouth every
morning and that's when I started brushing on a regular basis. I figure most
likely the same thing will happen to him.
Tina
On Sat, Dec 11, 2010 at 3:54 PM, Cornelia <corneliablik@...> wrote:
>
>
> Hello,
> We're pretty new to unschooling, and to this list (as far as posting goes)
> and have found it very informative and helpful. I wanted to ask for people's
> thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushing teeth.
> Many thanks in advance,
> Cornelia
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
kasia sokalla
Just so i understand - did Ethan NOT brush at all till 9?
Any cavities?
kasia
Any cavities?
kasia
On Dec 12, 2010, at 7:28 PM, Three Mommies wrote:
> Hey there :)
>
> The grown-ups in our house brush morning and night. We often
> announce that
> we are doing it and invite our guys to join us. Ryan (age 7) will
> often
> decline, but sometimes will ask one of us to bring him a "ready
> toothbrush"
> to him where he is and then will either ask one of us to brush his
> teeth or
> do it himself. Ethan was never into teooth-brushing until one day
> when he
> was about 9. He asked why we thought brushing was important. After
> hearing
> our reasons, he just thanked us and then didn't brush. A few weeks
> later he
> announced that when we brushed we should come to him and say "MAN."
> It was
> very important that we say only that and nothing more. He said MAN
> mean
> "Morning And Night" and that was his personal reminder that he
> wanted to
> brush. After that, he has mostly brushed twice a day when one of us
> does.
> Some days he doesn't feel like doing it, but then some days I skip
> it too ;)
>
> And that's the story of tooth brushing in our house *grin*
>
> Peace,
> Jean Elizabeth
>
> http://3mommies.blogspot.com
>
> On Sat, Dec 11, 2010 at 3:54 PM, Cornelia <corneliablik@...>
> wrote:
>
>>
>>
>> Hello,
>> We're pretty new to unschooling, and to this list (as far as
>> posting goes)
>> and have found it very informative and helpful. I wanted to ask for
>> people's
>> thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushing teeth.
>> Many thanks in advance,
>> Cornelia
>>
>>
>>
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
> ------------------------------------
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Cornelia
Thanks everyone for your replies - to expand a little - I wanted to know what people do for older children than our 3 and a half year old, and how it was for others toddlers too, since our little one is only two months. So far we have used an attached playful parenting vibe. Of course this is all done within the realm of trying to make our son brush his teeth happily and voluntarily kind of sort of ie following our agenda. That's why I was interested to know what radical unschoolers do, and if this is even considered a grey area or not, and if so at what age or always (if that makes sense!). It is the one thing on my agenda twice a day, and although we don't have a problem per se, and we use the same ideas as that very affirming link (thank you Joyce!), it still boils down to us parents negotiating a way to get our son to do what we think is best. It would never have occurred to me that there could be a different way to approach this, but then suddenly I thought you all might have some different views...so thank you to everyone who has replied and future posters - it is all food for thought and very helpful. I will keep thinking and reading.
Cornelia
Cornelia
--- In [email protected], "plaidpanties666" <plaidpanties666@...> wrote:
>
> "Cornelia" <corneliablik@> wrote:
> > I wanted to ask for people's thoughts/ideas/approaches to brushing teeth.
> ****************
>
> Knowing ages and other pertinent information could be helpful. In general, though, it can help you to think about your goals and your fears and work toward gaining a sense of perspective. There are options for oral hygiene besides brushing (rinses, wipes, specific foods) and a good more going on in the mouth than food=cavities. Genetics play a role. Overall health plays a roll. Stress plays a roll.
>
> If your kids are little, you can look for ways to make oral hygiene fun and appealing, and that works with some kids. Other kids do better by parents not making an issue out if it, just making sure supplies are available. But some families will also do better for mom and dad to drop the matter entirely for a few years rather than creating a power struggle around a behavior of questionable value. It all depends.
>
> ---Meredith
>
plaidpanties666
"Cornelia" <corneliablik@...> wrote:
Getting little kids to brush teeth is a pretty recent phenomenon, and there's plenty of controversy about the reaons and benefits. If you like a good conspiracy theory, there are some to be found around the topics of flouride and the tooth brushing industry as well as the dental industry in general.
Ray brushed his teeth frequently as a child and also had some cavities. Mo rarely brushes and doesn't seem to have noticeably more than he did. In terms of personal boundaries, Mo's are muuuuuuch firmer than Ray's so "getting" her to brush isn't really an option.
---Meredith
>************
> Thanks everyone for your replies - to expand a little - I wanted to know what people do for older children than our 3 and a half year old, and how it was for others toddlers too, since our little one is only two months. So far we have used an attached playful parenting vibe. Of course this is all done within the realm of trying to make our son brush his teeth happily and voluntarily
Getting little kids to brush teeth is a pretty recent phenomenon, and there's plenty of controversy about the reaons and benefits. If you like a good conspiracy theory, there are some to be found around the topics of flouride and the tooth brushing industry as well as the dental industry in general.
Ray brushed his teeth frequently as a child and also had some cavities. Mo rarely brushes and doesn't seem to have noticeably more than he did. In terms of personal boundaries, Mo's are muuuuuuch firmer than Ray's so "getting" her to brush isn't really an option.
---Meredith
The Coffee Goddess
My kids all have tooth brushes and pick out their own toothpaste, and sometimes they brush and sometimes they don't....same as me and my husband. It's one of those "big deals" made by the media that hasn't shown itself to be a big deal in my house. My 13 yo didn't brush his teeth really at all until he started to also care about hair and clothes, about 10 years old, and although he's had a few fillings, his teeth are gorgeous. He also didn't go to the dentist until 8 years old. I hear they are now recommending seeing a dentist at 1!! My 2 yo might put up with a dentist in her mouth (but we don't have insurance, so we'll save our money!), but none of my other kids would go along with that!
Dana Ellis
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Dana Ellis
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Tamara Shand
Meredith,
Briefly what are the option for wipes, rinses, specific foods? I take it magnesium rich foods help with tooth health?
I used to subscribe to the tooth brushing means healthy teeth philosophy until I was exposed to some of the ideas on this list. I encourage my 3 1/2 year old to brush with stories (peter pan fights the pirate bacteria, snow white toothbrush wants to come to the party in her mouth, etc), an assortment of novelty toothbrushes of her choosing and sometimes I ask her to rinse with water and xylitol.
My husband is more fixed on daily tooth brushing. Are there any good studies out there on tooth health that I might forward on to him?
Many thanks!
Tamara
Briefly what are the option for wipes, rinses, specific foods? I take it magnesium rich foods help with tooth health?
I used to subscribe to the tooth brushing means healthy teeth philosophy until I was exposed to some of the ideas on this list. I encourage my 3 1/2 year old to brush with stories (peter pan fights the pirate bacteria, snow white toothbrush wants to come to the party in her mouth, etc), an assortment of novelty toothbrushes of her choosing and sometimes I ask her to rinse with water and xylitol.
My husband is more fixed on daily tooth brushing. Are there any good studies out there on tooth health that I might forward on to him?
Many thanks!
Tamara
plaidpanties666
There are a couple yahoo lists that deal with alternative dental health care options - not unschooling lists, but helpful for some:
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/alternativekidsteeth/
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/veryyoungkidsteeth/
and a list called "Unschooling Nutrition" that *is* very definitely a radical unschooling list but is good for alternative health info:
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/UnschoolingNutrition/
That list has some current threads on preventing and even healing tooth decay - check it out!
I pick things up at health food stores and through my local organic buying club - tooth wipes and tongue scrapers and rinses are things I've found through those sources, along with saliva pH test stips (mouth pH plays a role in oral hygiene). Remineralization Paste is something I haven't found in my local shops, but toy with the idea of ordering.
Foods... depends on the philosophy. Food can be used as a surface cleaner, to modify pH or to improve gut/immune system health over all - I'm hoping Alex or someone else chimes in with specifics because I've lost those links and lists, I'm afraid.
---Meredith
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/alternativekidsteeth/
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/veryyoungkidsteeth/
and a list called "Unschooling Nutrition" that *is* very definitely a radical unschooling list but is good for alternative health info:
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/UnschoolingNutrition/
That list has some current threads on preventing and even healing tooth decay - check it out!
I pick things up at health food stores and through my local organic buying club - tooth wipes and tongue scrapers and rinses are things I've found through those sources, along with saliva pH test stips (mouth pH plays a role in oral hygiene). Remineralization Paste is something I haven't found in my local shops, but toy with the idea of ordering.
Foods... depends on the philosophy. Food can be used as a surface cleaner, to modify pH or to improve gut/immune system health over all - I'm hoping Alex or someone else chimes in with specifics because I've lost those links and lists, I'm afraid.
---Meredith
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY
Oh gosh sorry Meredith but I lost all those links when my laptop was replaced!
If you join those groups there are many awesome links in there to read.
I have not been active on those for about a year but if you read the links and
research the archives there isso much information!
As for brushing teeth I do help my kids brush at least once a day.
New tooth brushes, toothpaste they like, story, games, etc.
I do not force. They have at times said they did not want to brush.
I use xylitol and a remineralizing tooth gel.
All that info is in those groups.
We do drink raw milk but it is because we are Dairy Farmers.
Brushing is not a garantee that you will ave no cavities.
Mouth PH, presence of bacteria, genetics play a huge part in it togheter with
factores like dry mouth, mouth breathing, diet, position of teeth. Nothing is a
garantee.
There are many ways to help like using xylitol ( the make wipes, mints and gums)
and using
remineralizing pastes and much more.
My sisters kids have no cavities and she did not start brusing their teeth until
they were 3 or 4.
My kids had and I brushed their teeth since they were 6 months old!
I know my oldesthad cavities because he is a mouth breather. That kept the back
of his upper front teeth dry all night. IT is your saliva that helps reminerlize
your teeth at night while you sleep. There is also a big difference in people
that have an alkaline X acidic mouth PH.
Anyways, a lot of reading on those sites~!
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
If you join those groups there are many awesome links in there to read.
I have not been active on those for about a year but if you read the links and
research the archives there isso much information!
As for brushing teeth I do help my kids brush at least once a day.
New tooth brushes, toothpaste they like, story, games, etc.
I do not force. They have at times said they did not want to brush.
I use xylitol and a remineralizing tooth gel.
All that info is in those groups.
We do drink raw milk but it is because we are Dairy Farmers.
Brushing is not a garantee that you will ave no cavities.
Mouth PH, presence of bacteria, genetics play a huge part in it togheter with
factores like dry mouth, mouth breathing, diet, position of teeth. Nothing is a
garantee.
There are many ways to help like using xylitol ( the make wipes, mints and gums)
and using
remineralizing pastes and much more.
My sisters kids have no cavities and she did not start brusing their teeth until
they were 3 or 4.
My kids had and I brushed their teeth since they were 6 months old!
I know my oldesthad cavities because he is a mouth breather. That kept the back
of his upper front teeth dry all night. IT is your saliva that helps reminerlize
your teeth at night while you sleep. There is also a big difference in people
that have an alkaline X acidic mouth PH.
Anyways, a lot of reading on those sites~!
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
plaidpanties666
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY <polykowholsteins@...> wrote:
---Meredith (Mo 9, Ray 17)
>> I know my oldesthad cavities because he is a mouth breather. That kept the backOkay, just to add another "it depends" to the laundry list ;) I'm a chronic mouth breather (or I was as a child, yoga has helped a lot, but still, chronic sinus stuff) and have no trouble at all with my front teeth, and the backs of my teeth (the lingual side?) always gets compliments when I get my teeth cleaned. I only have cavities in the teeth with deep grooves, and Mo has the same deep grooves and the same spots for cavities. She's also something of a mouth breather but not as bad as I was as a child (I got the nickname Darth Vader!).
> of his upper front teeth dry all night. IT is your saliva that helps reminerlize
> your teeth at night while you sleep.
---Meredith (Mo 9, Ray 17)
Three Mommies
He brushed occasionally before he turned 9. He had one cavity when he was
about 7 or 8, but other than that, he's had no dental problems. Both guys go
to the dentist every 6 months. (Insurance=Good).
Peace,
Jean Elizabeth
http://3mommies.blogspot.com
about 7 or 8, but other than that, he's had no dental problems. Both guys go
to the dentist every 6 months. (Insurance=Good).
Peace,
Jean Elizabeth
http://3mommies.blogspot.com
On Sun, Dec 12, 2010 at 10:20 PM, kasia sokalla <kasia.sokalla@...>wrote:
>
>
> Just so i understand - did Ethan NOT brush at all till 9?
> Any cavities?
>
> kasia
>
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
BRIAN POLIKOWSKY
"
Okay, just to add another "it depends" to the laundry list ;) I'm a chronic
mouth breather (or I was as a child, yoga has helped a lot, but still, chronic
sinus stuff) and have no trouble at all with my front teeth, and the backs of my
teeth (the lingual side?) always gets compliments when I get my teeth cleaned. I
only have cavities in the teeth with deep grooves, and Mo has the same deep
grooves and the same spots for cavities. She's also something of a mouth
breather but not as bad as I was as a child (I got the nickname Darth Vader!). "
Absolutely.That is why genetics and other factors are important. I do not think
that MD's permanent teeth will have any problems. Baby teeth are not strong as
permanet and can even come in without the enamel. So many factors. Yes and MD's
dentist is always impressed how clean his teeth is now at 8 and getting his
permanent first molars. He only brushes at night. He does brush or 2 minutes
with his little times but we do not do the twice a day like the dentist tells us
too.
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Okay, just to add another "it depends" to the laundry list ;) I'm a chronic
mouth breather (or I was as a child, yoga has helped a lot, but still, chronic
sinus stuff) and have no trouble at all with my front teeth, and the backs of my
teeth (the lingual side?) always gets compliments when I get my teeth cleaned. I
only have cavities in the teeth with deep grooves, and Mo has the same deep
grooves and the same spots for cavities. She's also something of a mouth
breather but not as bad as I was as a child (I got the nickname Darth Vader!). "
Absolutely.That is why genetics and other factors are important. I do not think
that MD's permanent teeth will have any problems. Baby teeth are not strong as
permanet and can even come in without the enamel. So many factors. Yes and MD's
dentist is always impressed how clean his teeth is now at 8 and getting his
permanent first molars. He only brushes at night. He does brush or 2 minutes
with his little times but we do not do the twice a day like the dentist tells us
too.
Alex Polikowsky
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Andrea Catalano
Tooth brushing is part of our regular night time routine. My kids (3 and 4.5) watch a two to three minute you tube video of their choosing while we brush their teeth at night. We use spin brushes which help make it fast. In the morning when I brush my teeth I invite the kids to join me. They sometimes do, my 3 year old more often than the 4 year old. In the morning, they brush by themselves most if the time. I have little silicone bristle brushes intended for little kids to bite on to brush their teeth. My 4 year old likes to use that sometimes when he's playing or watching TV. Mostly they are happy to brush their teeth. At times when they don't want to (like when they are very tired) we don't push it.
Andrea
Sent from my iPhone
Andrea
Sent from my iPhone