Jennifer

My daughter just turned seven last month.

If she asks me what a word is, I tell her. I don't ask
her to sound it out or give her a mini-phonics lesson.

She's not interested in reading "beginner books," but
she does like to listen to Junie B. Jones books, and
Judy Blume's Fudge books, on audio, then later read a
chapter or two of the book herself.

Interestingly, she seems to struggle over reading
these, but she is not frustrated by it. What I mean
is, she doesn't seem to mind the struggle. She doesn't
say things like, "This is so hard, I can't do this!"

Now here's where I'm getting all weird and worried: Am
I making her struggle unecessarily because I'm not
spending time teaching her phonics rules and things
like that?

I'm thinking that they are "tools" that will help her
accomplish her goal (of reading Junie B jones books)
and when I think of it that way, it seems like it
would be only kind to give her the tools she needs.

I guess I just worry that I'm making things harder for
her by not giving her more information. Of course, if
she asked, I would tell her.

Any thoughts about all this?

Thanks
Jenny

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Joyce Fetteroll

On May 6, 2008, at 8:54 AM, Jennifer wrote:

> I guess I just worry that I'm making things harder for
> her by not giving her more information. Of course, if
> she asked, I would tell her.

It makes sense that handing people the information first so they can
do something would work best. But it isn't how human brains operate.
If they did, schools would work wonders and everyone would come out
as Harvard material ;-)

We learn best by figuring things out and reaching for information
when we can see the problem.

For most people it's much easier to mess around with something new
and then read the directions. Messing around gives us a structure to
hang new information on and since we've created the structure
ourselves and are reaching for information that goes in a particular
spot we want to figure out, it makes a lot more sense.

If someone is handing us answers to questions we aren't asking we
just have to memorize it. It isn't meaningful.

If people like the answers before the questions, we'd all just look
up the answers to the crossword puzzles without trying them ;-) We'd
look at the last chapter to see who did it.

Puzzling things out is fun :-) It's like a mystery story we get to
figure out for real. And we can test our theories out for real. And
we can interview experts to fill in gaps in our knowledge.

Joyce

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Kim Musolff

***What I mean
is, she doesn't seem to mind the struggle.***

I think this is the key! If she doesn't mind the struggle, then she is
doing just fine! She obviously doesn't see a problem. In fact, she's
probably enjoying "solving the puzzle," as Joyce put it!

Here's how I would go about this, if this were my child:
I'd notice that DD was enjoying doing what she's doing, and let her be. If
at any time I sensed (or she directly asked me) that she might be interested
in "phonics" or any other reading strategy (Remember, there are many more
ways to read than by just using phonics!), then I'd give her just a little
taste. If she liked it, I'd give her more. If not, I'd forget it. And the
most important thing would be to always stay in tune with her, and not hop
on the reading train with my own agenda, just because she showed a spark of
an interest.

She is enjoying reading right now, and that is the biggest thing that will
make her want to continue reading (and figure things out). If she wants
more guidance, you'll be able to sense that. She will either ask you
directly, or you'll notice, because you are in tune with her needs. Just
don't make decisions based on your fear that she is not going to learn if
you don't teach her something.

But that's just my opinion.
Kim


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Joyce Fetteroll

> If
> at any time I sensed (or she directly asked me) that she might be
> interested
> in "phonics" or any other reading strategy (Remember, there are
> many more
> ways to read than by just using phonics!), then I'd give her just a
> little
> taste. If she liked it, I'd give her more. If not, I'd forget it.

Even better, don't think in terms of some formal body of knowledge
that's outside of her that she needs inside of her. Forget that
there's some collection of rules out there that kids "need" in order
to read.

Picture it like this:

Teachers face this huge pile of bricks stacked up for them that
they're required to hand to the child in a specific order. They're
always facing that pile and handing off bricks and judging to see how
well they're transferring the pile.

Unschoolers don't have a pile. They have the world around them. But
instead of facing the world, they face the child. If the child asks
for a brick, you hand it to them. But you're confident the child is
running around picking up her own bricks because you've got her out
in the world (instead of locked up in the classroom with the bricks
controlled by the teacher). If you know of an interesting brick that
would go with the one she's asked for or picked up, point it out. If
she's interested, find more. If she's not, let it go.

So, just answer her questions. :-)

If you have something interesting to add -- eg, "Ph usually means the
word was originally Greek," "There's "a rat" in separate." -- add it.
It could start a conversation, one that might lead well away from
learning to read. That's how real learning happens. Things connect to
other things in seemingly random fashion, but that's how we learn, by
creating a huge multi-dimensional net of connections.

By her reaction, by her body language, by her other questions judge
if she wants more information. Get to know your daughter that way :-)

Joyce

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Kim Musolff

*** Teachers face this huge pile of bricks stacked up for them that
they're required to hand to the child in a specific order. They're
always facing that pile and handing off bricks and judging to see how
well they're transferring the pile.

Unschoolers don't have a pile. They have the world around them. But
instead of facing the world, they face the child. If the child asks
for a brick, you hand it to them. But you're confident the child is
running around picking up her own bricks because you've got her out
in the world (instead of locked up in the classroom with the bricks
controlled by the teacher). If you know of an interesting brick that
would go with the one she's asked for or picked up, point it out. If
she's interested, find more. If she's not, let it go.***

I like this analogy! I think it's what I was trying to say, but since I am
new to unschooling, it probably sounded schoolish. This is a great
unschooling way of looking at it! I love it! Joyce, you're awesome!

Kim


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