Karen Swanay

What I guess is that if you show her she will think you are crazy and
don't know how to play the game right. I'd go with her way. If you
want to show her the "right" way and it's eating at you, you can
always frame it as "Hey Pumpkin, I want to show you a game Mommy
played as a little girl just your age!" If she asks what it's called
just call it something other than what she calls her game. And show
her. She'll let you know which she prefers. But for a 3 yr old
traditional H&S is too hard and they often change the rules or cheat
to be successful. So were this my kid I'd let it ride. But that
doesn't mean I'm right.

Karen

On Mon, Mar 31, 2008 at 1:57 PM, Agnieszka <mama_agnieszka@...> wrote:
>
>
>
>
> My 3 year old is playing her own version of hide-and-seek and I've had
> this awful urge to show her "how it's done"!

Wendy McDonald

Try to enjoy that inventiveness.

My dds Penny & Emma (Our last name starts with "M") used to call M&Ms
"EmmaMs" -- and now that they've figured out the "right" way to say
it, I really, really miss having EmmaMs in my freezer. Now I only
have M&M's and somehow they don't taste as good.

Wendy M

--- In [email protected], "Agnieszka"
<mama_agnieszka@...> wrote:
>
> My 3 year old is playing her own version of hide-and-seek and I've had
> this awful urge to show her "how it's done"! My gut tells me that
> there is value in her playing the game the way she's figured (and
> deduced from watching children's dvd's)... but oh that urge! And,
> there is guilt, too - if I'm not actively teaching her things every
> day, "what kind of a mother am I"? A good enough mother, I know
> intellectually. But...
>
> Thoughts?
>
> Agnieszka
>

Joyce Fetteroll

On Mar 31, 2008, at 2:57 PM, Agnieszka wrote:

> My 3 year old is playing her own version of hide-and-seek and I've had
> this awful urge to show her "how it's done"!

Maybe it will help to picture a 3 yo who has memorized all the games
her mother has taught her but is totally unable to come up with a
game on her own.

Which is more valuable?

Joyce

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Debra Rossing

Play it the way it's FUN for everyone - there are almost as many ways to
play hide-and-seek as there are kids who've played it. If you know a few
people who grew up in different areas of the country (or other countries
even!), do a quick poll of the 'rules' for some common 'children's'
game. Odds are you'll get variations in the way they played.

Maybe it's time to work on losing that idea of "actively teaching".
Learning IS happening whether you're "actively teaching" or not.

Deb


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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

juillet727

Hi--
Enjoy your daughter's creativity! It makes it so much more fun! My 8yr
old son still does the same thing--we make up rules to all sorts of
games, pretty much all of them help him win easier and it can get
really silly and fun and we crack up a lot about the "new rules". When
he was really little, he would *place me* where I was to hide and then
he would go and count ("1,2,7,3,4,2,3...") and then look for me and
ultimately find me and we'd celebrate and whoop, "you found me!" It's
all good.

Have you ever read the cartoon Calvin and Hobbes? (a 1st grade boy and
his stuffed tiger who comes to life when there are no adults around)
They have an ongoing game called Calvinball where they each make up
the rules as they play the game and it is a riot. Totally fun and
absurd. We play monopoly like that, making up the rules as we play so
we can win in unpredictable silly ways.

Enjoy it! There will be plenty of times to learn to play (anything)
correctly later. You know how in society how people think kids should
learn things to prepare them for later things? If your daughter
doesn't learn "rules of play" correctly now, she'll learn them later.
It's not a big deal.
~~Enjoy,
Juillet


--- In [email protected], "Agnieszka"
<mama_agnieszka@...> wrote:
>
> My 3 year old is playing her own version of hide-and-seek and I've had
> this awful urge to show her "how it's done"! My gut tells me that
> there is value in her playing the game the way she's figured (and
> deduced from watching children's dvd's)... but oh that urge! And,
> there is guilt, too - if I'm not actively teaching her things every
> day, "what kind of a mother am I"? A good enough mother, I know
> intellectually. But...
>
> Thoughts?
>
> Agnieszka
>

keetry

--- In [email protected], "Agnieszka"
<mama_agnieszka@...> wrote:
>
> My 3 year old is playing her own version of hide-and-seek and I've
had
> this awful urge to show her "how it's done"! My gut tells me that
> there is value in her playing the game the way she's figured (and
> deduced from watching children's dvd's)... but oh that urge! And,
> there is guilt, too - if I'm not actively teaching her things every
> day, "what kind of a mother am I"? A good enough mother, I know
> intellectually. But...
>
> Thoughts?
>
> Agnieszka
>

I might ask the child if s/he wanted to play X game if I were
inspired by the moment to play the game but not because I wanted to
teach the game to the child. If the child showed interest, then I
would show and/or explain how it's done. But if the child is already
playing the game the way s/he wants, I wouldn't interfere. How very
cool and creative that she's come up with her own version of a game.

If you are actively involved with your child, you are being a "good"
mother. She will learn from being a part of your world.

Alysia