[email protected]

Valerie wrote:
<<<<<If you got the Teaching vs Learning speech, can you tell how
rattled I got when almost ALL of the people left when I
said "Teaching is about the teacher; Learning is about the learner."
>>>>>

They got up and left? Ouch.

That sure didn't happen at Live and Learn. I think most were
disappointed that you didn't get to finish all you had to say!

I loved the story about the spilled water in the restaurant. My
daughter and I have put that in our bag of tricks on how to distract
unruly parents. . .

Mercedes
who can't imagine unschooling in Louisiana - or anywhere in the deep
south really - in the early 80's. . .

Krisula Moyer

Mercedes wrote: (about Varie's speech at the conference)

>>I loved the story about the spilled water in the restaurant. My
daughter and I have put that in our bag of tricks on how to distract
unruly parents. . . <<

Ooh, Ooh, could you share that one with those of us who couldn't make it to
the conference? I just love new techniques for unruly parents!

-Krisula ...wishing she could've been there.

Jill Parmer

I'm not Valerie, but I was at breakfast with her.

We were having a lovely, unschooling, mindful parenting discussion at a cafe, when all of a sudden Valerie got a stiff, serious look on her face. Then I got quiet and listened to what was going on behind me.

A young girl (4 or 5 yrs) had spilled her coke, and her dad was berating her, how many times have I told you..., why can't you... Valerie and I just sat there ( I felt paralyzed) for a few nanoseconds. Then I said, "you think we ought to spill a few cokes over here?" I am usually not a quick thinker in those situations, the unschooling gods shone down on me for a moment. After a couple more reeeeeaaaalllly long nanoseconds, Valerie knocked over her coke. The waitress cleaning up the girl's spill said, "Oh that's OK, I've got the mop right here." It took the heat off the little girl for awhile.

The grandma sitting at that table was embarrassed by her son's (the dad) actions. She asked him several times to "please stop" his mean comments and behavior. He continued to be rude at different times throughout the meal. For whatever reason, sick or sick of her treatment, the little girl threw up on her plate. I think there was a bit more compassion for her for awhile.

Valerie, I hope you'll elaborate, if I missed anything.

Jill


----- Original Message -----
From: Krisula Moyer
To: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, September 09, 2004 9:31 AM
Subject: [unschoolingbasics] RE: Valerie Speeches WAS Karen




Mercedes wrote: (about Varie's speech at the conference)

>>I loved the story about the spilled water in the restaurant. My
daughter and I have put that in our bag of tricks on how to distract
unruly parents. . . <<

Ooh, Ooh, could you share that one with those of us who couldn't make it to
the conference? I just love new techniques for unruly parents!

-Krisula ...wishing she could've been there



[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

Valerie

I was disappointed that I didn't get to finish, but I know it
couldn't be helped.

I have to say that it was really exciting knocking my drink over in
the restaurant. Hell, it was worth it just to see the look on Jill's
face. <g>

Ya know, Mercedes... if I think too long about how I unschooled in
the early 80's and had no doubts, it scares me. lol I musta been
outta my mind! Thank goodness I didn't think too long about it while
it was happening!

love, Valerie
www.ubpub.com

> They got up and left? Ouch.
>
> That sure didn't happen at Live and Learn. I think most were
> disappointed that you didn't get to finish all you had to say!
>
> I loved the story about the spilled water in the restaurant. My
> daughter and I have put that in our bag of tricks on how to
distract
> unruly parents. . .
>
> Mercedes
> who can't imagine unschooling in Louisiana - or anywhere in the
deep
> south really - in the early 80's. . .

Valerie

> Valerie, I hope you'll elaborate, if I missed anything.
>
> Jill


***** You did fine, Jill. Our point (mine and yours) was to show the
dad that accidents happen to ALL of us; that his daughter wasn't
deliberately being a klutz, like he suggested.

After the trauma of the spills, the dad picked up his young son and
put him on his lap and hugged him. The little girl walked to his
chair and put her arm around the dad and said "I want a hug too." He
then told her in no uncertain terms that when she stopped being a
bad girl, he'd hug her. That's when the grandma looked at me with
sad eyes, then she appeared to get a bit stronger and asked him to
Please Stop Doing That to Her. He didn't, so she puked in her plate
and he was forced to be kind to her for a few minutes and wipe her
mouth.

I truly wished I had a copy of my book with me for him... not to
give it to him, but to hit him over the head with it. Ok, ok, I
would have begged him to read it and not hit him.. but I have angry
moments too.

It was a truly nauseating scene.

love, Valerie
www.ubpub.com

Jill Parmer

<<<I have to say that it was really exciting knocking my drink over in
the restaurant. Hell, it was worth it just to see the look on Jill's
face. <g> >>>

Oooh, I wonder what my look was; yahoo? excitment? awe? I *was* thinking: "Go Valerie!" I admire your courage.

And, Mercedes, thanks for telling the part about Valerie *tipping* the waitress for cleaning up the spill. I never know how much to write of a story, and I realize that was an important part, especially if people try *this trick at home*, since it causes more work for someone else.

~Jill

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]