Childhood is NOT a dress rehearsal
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The "tag line" of the accountability association I run in SC to allow
families to homeschool is "Childhood is NOT a dress rehearsal."
Unfortunately, I get reminded of this every now and then. Not that I
don't *need* to be reminded. It's just that I wish I weren't reminded
in such a harsh way.
I think most traditional, conventional parents think of something
different when they hear or read it. I think they start considering
that we only have this one chance to push our children to do better, to
be better, and to strive harder for that medical degree or career
choice or..."success" or whatever.
That's not the message I get.
I've been thinking about what to write now for several days to honor
the memory of Hannah Jenner, who died two years ago on February 24. I'd
wanted to toss out there that we really DO only have so much time to
spend with our children---and even though we *think* have the rest of
their lives to do and be with them, there's no guarantee that they
won't be taken from us a whole lot sooner than we think. The time they
spend with us should be full of joy and fun and happy, happy thoughts.
Their time with us should be filled with *our* joy in them---that they
know that our world is a better place *because* of them.
Hannah's short life is a tough reminder for me to enjoy the children I
have---and every single minute. And not a day goes by that I don't
think of Hannah (and Sam Wilkerson and Jacob Strebler). 'Cause I just
don't know what I would do without Cameron and Duncan. But sometimes,
when I'm not my best and my temper is short, I *need* that little
reminder---that this time is a gift.
Too often, parents can work so hard helping our children "become" that
we forget to enjoy Who They *Are*--right now, this minute.
Lisa Heyman's passing yesterday has stunned this community. And I just
can't imagine the pain and loss the Gauchmans are experiencing right
now. But I *know* that the girls, Roxy and Fire, will know that their
mom truly valued the time she had with them. She chose to keep the
girls close and let them grow "In Their Own Way, In Their Own Time."
That's a gift we can ALL give our children. To accept Who They
Are---and to revel in it!
We have that choice.
Lisa understood that childhood is not a dress rehearsal. Lisa worked
hard to give her girls he space they needed to grow. She gave them
inspired, joyful childhoods. There's not a doubt in my mind that Roxy
and Fire will thrive in spite of their huge, huge loss. And a big part
of that is the love and acceptance Lisa showered on them. They will
kept warm with her light.
Her passing will continue to be a reminder that *my* time with my kids
is limited as well. I can choose to make the most of each moment with
them as she did. Our world is brighter because of Lisa. And I'm glad I
got to know her.
Much Love and Many Hugs to Larry and Roxy and Fire.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
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families to homeschool is "Childhood is NOT a dress rehearsal."
Unfortunately, I get reminded of this every now and then. Not that I
don't *need* to be reminded. It's just that I wish I weren't reminded
in such a harsh way.
I think most traditional, conventional parents think of something
different when they hear or read it. I think they start considering
that we only have this one chance to push our children to do better, to
be better, and to strive harder for that medical degree or career
choice or..."success" or whatever.
That's not the message I get.
I've been thinking about what to write now for several days to honor
the memory of Hannah Jenner, who died two years ago on February 24. I'd
wanted to toss out there that we really DO only have so much time to
spend with our children---and even though we *think* have the rest of
their lives to do and be with them, there's no guarantee that they
won't be taken from us a whole lot sooner than we think. The time they
spend with us should be full of joy and fun and happy, happy thoughts.
Their time with us should be filled with *our* joy in them---that they
know that our world is a better place *because* of them.
Hannah's short life is a tough reminder for me to enjoy the children I
have---and every single minute. And not a day goes by that I don't
think of Hannah (and Sam Wilkerson and Jacob Strebler). 'Cause I just
don't know what I would do without Cameron and Duncan. But sometimes,
when I'm not my best and my temper is short, I *need* that little
reminder---that this time is a gift.
Too often, parents can work so hard helping our children "become" that
we forget to enjoy Who They *Are*--right now, this minute.
Lisa Heyman's passing yesterday has stunned this community. And I just
can't imagine the pain and loss the Gauchmans are experiencing right
now. But I *know* that the girls, Roxy and Fire, will know that their
mom truly valued the time she had with them. She chose to keep the
girls close and let them grow "In Their Own Way, In Their Own Time."
That's a gift we can ALL give our children. To accept Who They
Are---and to revel in it!
We have that choice.
Lisa understood that childhood is not a dress rehearsal. Lisa worked
hard to give her girls he space they needed to grow. She gave them
inspired, joyful childhoods. There's not a doubt in my mind that Roxy
and Fire will thrive in spite of their huge, huge loss. And a big part
of that is the love and acceptance Lisa showered on them. They will
kept warm with her light.
Her passing will continue to be a reminder that *my* time with my kids
is limited as well. I can choose to make the most of each moment with
them as she did. Our world is brighter because of Lisa. And I'm glad I
got to know her.
Much Love and Many Hugs to Larry and Roxy and Fire.
~Kelly
Kelly Lovejoy
Conference Coordinator
Live and Learn Unschooling Conference
http://www.LiveandLearnConference.org
________________________________________________________________________
More new features than ever. Check out the new AOL Mail ! -
http://webmail.aol.com
Robin Bentley
Kelly, you've written a beautiful tribute to Lisa (and to Hannah, Sam and Jacob). My thoughts
are with Lisa's dh and girls, as they are with the other families who lost their loved ones.
And thanks for the reminder about "In Their Own Way, In Their Own Time."
This came up just last night, after *I* had a meltdown. I thought, "I can't let this be our last
exchange," so I went back to dd's room and we sat and talked for almost an hour. This hardly
ever happens! Dd's not only very private, she feels cornered sometimes when I want to talk. I
write her a lot of letters <g>. So, it was a sweet, close time. Later on, she couldn't sleep and
asked to crawl into bed with me. I felt so lucky to have the opportunity to turn things around,
and to have my "big" girl physically close again, if only for a little while. I will remember that
our time is finite. And to allow her to grow in her own way, in her own time.
That mantra will be Lisa's legacy, at least for me.
Robin B.
are with Lisa's dh and girls, as they are with the other families who lost their loved ones.
And thanks for the reminder about "In Their Own Way, In Their Own Time."
This came up just last night, after *I* had a meltdown. I thought, "I can't let this be our last
exchange," so I went back to dd's room and we sat and talked for almost an hour. This hardly
ever happens! Dd's not only very private, she feels cornered sometimes when I want to talk. I
write her a lot of letters <g>. So, it was a sweet, close time. Later on, she couldn't sleep and
asked to crawl into bed with me. I felt so lucky to have the opportunity to turn things around,
and to have my "big" girl physically close again, if only for a little while. I will remember that
our time is finite. And to allow her to grow in her own way, in her own time.
That mantra will be Lisa's legacy, at least for me.
Robin B.